Breaking free of the uncomfortable comfort

by Rachel Mascord, BDS, Sydney and Warrawong.

This has been an extraordinary week in my life…a point of endings and new beginnings that have left me raw and vulnerable in a way I’ve rarely allowed myself to experience before.

I submitted my resignation this week. This has been a momentous step because it is the first time I have left a job with no other job to go to. I had held this position for more than 16 years, and a very comfortable nest it became indeed. My comfort in this job lay in the “security” of its tenure, but an uncomfortable and damaging comfort it was. The price I was paying was high; its coinage the toleration of a constant level of low grade disrespect and the sort of subtle abuse that people learn to cope with, in some way or another. After all, it is quite the normal thing in this world…isn’t it? It is an abuse that does not mark the flesh, but rather more insidiously leaves its bruises deep and unseen upon the heart and the being.

Leaving it has felt like I imagine the baby bird must feel as it extends its wings for the first time, surrendering itself from the edge of the nest that has held it safe for so long…

Never have I allowed such a level of open vulnerability in my life. Never have I allowed such a level of surrender, never have I stated that I trust myself so deeply and all of the resource that comes, innate, rich and sourced from deep within me.

The extraordinariness of this time of my life cannot easily be laid out in word. My body, long tightened and tensed against the constant low bubble of tension and hurt has registered the release and celebrated with the release of its own in the form of a substantial health problem. “Here you go,” it has said to me, “take a look at how you have been negotiating your way through life. Do you see the way you have been gripping the reins for so long that your fingers no longer straighten and soften in tender supplication to the Divine Will? Do you feel the armour you have made of your chest to bear the hurts of disrespect others have sent your way – a disrespect you have not loved and respected yourself enough to ever address?

Do you feel the magnitude of the lack of trust you have had in yourself and consequently the lack of surrender to your Father’s Will? All of this I am revealing unto thee, the truth of your thus far Living Way…are you ready to release the fingers you have clenched hard, thus releasing us from the uncomfortable comfort you have made my home for so long? Are you at last, willing to let go that fearful control of circumstance that has felt like the only way to make your way through life? Are you willing to know that you are enough, more than enough? Are you yet willing to hand yourself unto God’s way, as he would live on Earth?”

How can I ignore such questions, asked of me, by my body, with such poignant and pointed clarity?

My response to it has been to harken myself, sharpen my ears and listen attentively. I have also been to see the most remarkable doctor of my life. No stone shall be left unturned medically, but I also know that even the greatest medicine can only treat that which I give it access to treat. The doctor can only play his part, the rest is up to me; is my part. It is the life I live and how I choose to live it.

So in consideration of this I ask myself: Shall I ever allow abuse again? What occurs to me in typing these words is that we humans have become so inured to abuse…the words “get over it”, “what’s wrong with you?”, “you’re too sensitive” fall from our lips so easily that they constitute our normal daily way of conversing with each other. Is this not how we have reached a point that it takes the most brutal of extremes of televised abuse to make us lift our heads from our evening meal and shake our heads before we take the next mouthful?

How many of us subsist in life, negotiating our way through the minefield of “hurt or be hurt,” that human life has become. Our fingers tighten on the reins of our lives, no longer able to straighten and soften in tender supplication to a Divine Will that we have long forgotten even existed.

It was Universal Medicine that reminded me, both of the Divine Will and inspired me to ignite again my willingness to live its Way…The Way of The Livingness. But to do so I have had to learn the greatest lesson of my life…that is to say no to abuse in its tiniest expression.

For even one drop of abuse is poison to the whole.

This bout of sickness, the grace of my very delicate body, has offered me the Truth of how I chose to exist for so very long. And now offers me a dare, if you will…if Love would ever offer such a thing…a dare to live with nothing but the greatest dedication to love, to my essence, my Soul. To live as God would live on Earth. Dare I ignore this firm directive to look within myself and see the glorious kernel of God’s Love that is my essence? How can I not, in the face of this truth, let go of the uncomfortable safety we call comfort and thus restore myself to the Living Son of God I am?

 

Read more:

  1. Why wait? Let’s discard out-of-date and abusive attitudes about gender now!
  2. Love – the missing link in gender equality. 

 

 

692 thoughts on “Breaking free of the uncomfortable comfort

  1. Sometimes we put ourselves under conditions with the best intentions and thereby not seeing the consequences these conditions have on our body and well-being. The good intention or sometimes simply complying with circumstances we consider to be normal and thus acceptable numb us for what is actually going on, but when we eventually experience the absence of the conditions we re-sensitize to what has actually occurred, like a veil being taken away and now seeing clearly again.

  2. There is so much more abuse in the world than we currently are seeing. Basically not honouring how we are divine and loving beings is abuse, if we could go there to say it. It is true though, don’t we not all want to be treasured and loved for who we are and seen as amazing in our essence?

  3. I so love this blog, most of us live in the comfort of a measured life that we have carved out for ourselves but it is time that more of us took the plunge into surrender land and fly off that cliff for the first time once again.

    1. I agree Kevin, and the comfort of a measured life which can seem safe is so limiting, keeping us small. Surrendering and taking the steps out of our comfort zone opens us up to the divinity of ourselves and the universe.

  4. There is so much harshness and roughness in this world that so many abusive ways are seen as normal that we treat ourselves and others in. But if we have a hard time knowing of the tenderness that we deserve we can simply ask ourselves the question in any situation if we would treat a new born child equally as we treat ourselves. We were all once very tender and delicate little babies and this preciousness never goes away.

  5. ‘Our fingers tighten on the reins of our lives, no longer able to straighten and soften in tender supplication to a Divine Will that we have long forgotten even existed.’ What a beautiful way to describe how the control of the mind has overruled the wisdom and love of the body for so long that we no longer dare to surrender, feeling that we will fall into a dark whole of nothingness when in truth if we let go the most solid of grounds is right beneath our feet.

  6. I can really feel Rachel the total responsibility you have taken for the choices you have made to allow abuse in your life. In this there is no blame projected to another just the facts that our need for security and the comfort in keeping things familiar is a prison of our own making.

  7. Comfort has always had a short life span for me; I was always running away! I never liked to finish anything completely and would regularly make life uncomfortable. That was my comfort and being uncomfortable at the same time. I still take the occasional calculated risk, generally affected by my experienced past disastrous ill choices as things not to do. My catalogue of trial and error efforts has lots of errors on record. I enjoy expanding and evolving how I am, I am no longer running away, but I am walking with myself.

  8. It is truly loving to allow ourselves to rock the boat of our comfortable lives and surrender to our wiser and divine selves and start to live and move from that deep love.

  9. It is interesting how being out of work really gives an “in your face” opportunity to develop a surrender to what is there for you in every moment.

  10. It is so interesting how we can get caught in comfort and not notice the abuse we have allowed in, especially when it is very subtle. We would say ‘it’s something small, doesn’t really matter’, but in truth it does, everything matters. When we start to respect our self and say no to even the smallest abuse, and surrender to the divine will, we get looked after by GOD.

  11. self-abuse is better known as a way of life these days where it has become so much the norm that for one to call it abuse is being thought of as ridiculous. For me it has a been a climbing scale of learning to recognise, (and still learning) abuse for what it is in all it’s details. All that goes against what our body is communicating with us is abuse, it is that plain and simple.

  12. It is so freeing when we let go of the control and surrender to the universal flow and allow our self to be guided by God and the Hierachy.

  13. There are so many amazing points and questions you’ve presented Rachel, all deeply inspiring and powerful.

  14. It seems life from day one sets upon us to start building protection, so often in my life I have heard the words “get over it”, “what’s wrong with you?”, “you’re too sensitive” so you try get over it , say nothing is wrong and deeply mask the sensitivity until you bury it so deep as to appear on the surface that nothing can touch us.We should be taught surrender from day one and treasure our sensitivity and be able to live in a world where that is honoured.

  15. What is extraordinary is how much subtle abuse we can take particularly in our jobs… And until we, eventually as you have done, free ourselves of this tyranny… To feel then the freedom in one’s body.

  16. A great blog that brings us to the truth of how harming any kind of disrespect or disdain for another human being is and how this is going on all the time but we have become so hardened to it that we ignore it. We don’t want to know what is happening. Our bodies though register everything and eventually our disregard catches up with us. You are setting a great example here for us Rachel and let’s speak out more about the underlying abuse that is running our world. There can be no love where this attitude of supremacy exists.

  17. “…a dare to live with nothing but the greatest dedication to love, to my essence, my Soul. To live as God would live on Earth. ” yes, yes, and yes again YES, YES, YES. With my whole being Yes.

  18. When will our humanness give way, so we can ‘live as God would live on Earth’? Is it possible that one day we all will, and through our divine Will, Thy Will be done? So when we bring a focus to our movements and be one with the harmony that can be experienced by our body, then by our Will, the connection to our Soul is assured. Then being Soul connected, we will ‘live as God would live on Earth’!

  19. This is an extraordinary blog that resonates deeply for me as there are so many areas of comfort that I have sat in that pain me when I know what the true potential is to live. Thank you for sharing how the pictures we have of the way life should be are often clouding where we truly need to be.

  20. Rachel, this is a very powerful article; a stepping up to live a truly loving, heavenly life, a big change from living in the comfort that so many of us settle for.

  21. The bird that leaves the nest for the first time is a great analogy. The bird will have little idea of what is beyond the nest but it just knows that everything it needs to do and have is beyond that edge, and it trusts that knowing. A great movement in nature to learn from.

  22. Reading this article makes me feel the abuse that we live with in our lives. It has been feeling our divinity that has helped me see the abuse. But it doesn’t stop there because then we have to do something about that abuse, and that often means standing out. Is this part of why we don’t want to see our divinity, because we will have to stand out? feels a bit like flying that nest- uncomfortable and yet a complete surrender to the truth of who we are which is very freeing.

  23. If we consider that building and maintaining security is the name of the game for most of us, it makes sense how little by little we can compromise our wellbeing by accepting and allowing less than true care in our lives.

  24. “Never have I allowed such a level of open vulnerability in my life. Never have I allowed such a level of surrender, never have I stated that I trust myself so deeply and all of the resource that comes, innate, rich and sourced from deep within me.”

    These words have an impact on the word ‘security’ as the patterns of life can keep us small when the potential to live our true potential comes with the trust.

  25. I love reading this blog. Your fragility and absolute surrender unto yourself is tangible and inspiring. Thank you for being so vulnerable and open Rachel.

  26. Where you talk of the low grade disrespect and subtle abuses people learn to cope with.. this has inspired me to ponder on this and take a look more deeply. Thank you.

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