Opening of my heart

By Irene Sheard, Aged care worker and grandmother, Goonellabah

We often hear the phrase “opening our heart” but what does it truly mean?

There are a lot of references about the heart such as hard hearted, mean hearted, cold hearted, and of course the one many aspire to, “open hearted”. I have always considered myself a fairly “kind hearted” person who cared about others and made myself available to help others whenever I could. It is easy and convenient to think of ourselves in this way as we then don’t have to change anything and can keep living our life in the same old way, but how true is this perception of ourselves?  Could what we think is our heart be an emotional part of us and not the original loving heart?

I have been unfolding this question for some years now by attending presentations by Serge Benhayon, the founder of Universal Medicine.

One of the first things I realised by attending these presentations is that I am already everything that is glorious and loving and that the parts of me that I think I am are only cover ups that I have learnt to live by, to literally cover up my hurts.  I then believe that I am this person, whether it be a positive belief, such as “I am loving and caring” or a negative belief that I am “a horrible person who hurts others”.

As I dug deeper into this I realised that my behaviours had developed in reaction to my past hurts and fears and that I wasn’t being as gentle and loving with others as I had previously believed and I especially wasn’t being gentle and loving with myself.

As I explored further I began to feel the harshness and hardness in which I lived.  It was quite shocking to me at first, but when I started to make those first steps towards gentleness (a bridge to love) I could then feel the depth of the hardness and how far away from love I was actually living. As I took these small steps I could feel a melting away of the hardness and a more connected way of being.  I was able to realise this by observing how I was feeling in my body.

I began to understand the teaching by Serge Benhayon that “The body is the marker of all Truth” and this allowed me, with the support of Universal Medicine practitioners, to feel deeper and deeper into my body and I started to understand its language.  I no longer felt a victim of my body and began to understand it was my friend and I began to take notice of its messages.

I started by practising gentleness in my daily actions in life, such as cleaning the house, cleaning my teeth, washing my face, drying my body after a shower, putting on makeup, washing up and putting myself to bed for the night.

My life started to change to a less chaotic way of living where I was able to feel a rhythm to my day and a lovely letting go at night for rest.

I was definitely feeling a more loving sense towards myself, but sometimes I chose to ignore the messages from my body, especially when I felt I needed to please others. I became more aware of my “helping” patterns and started questioning the reasons I did things for others and what energy I actually did them in. I realised the reasons I helped others was that I found it almost impossible to say “no” to requests and that I enjoyed the fact that I could be seen as “a good person”.

This was not an easy pattern to change.  There were reactions from the people who had experienced my willingness to “help” in spite of my own needs.  These reactions were mainly from family members whom I had taken on as a “rescue mission” for years and believed I could help them live a “better” life.  It allowed me to feel important and that I had all the answers, that they weren’t even searching for.  Suffice to say this was very exhausting on my body.  It tried to tell me by manifesting chronic fatigue, depression and anxiousness. In the past I had only used band-aid solutions to deal with these conditions but now felt I needed to explore the deeper causes.

I then began to feel how many “hurts” I had experienced over the years.  This was even harder to feel and admit but as I started to release these hurts from my body it felt lighter and more settled.  I learnt that I actually have a choice to allow someone else to so-called “hurt” me, or instead I can bring understanding to the situation and allow my heart to stay “open” and in connection with myself and others.

This was a process that took some time to unfold and is something I still deal with on a daily basis.  I started to feel a lot more energetic, a lot lighter and began to enjoy my life and take steps that I never would have imagined I could take when I was so bound by my old patterns of hurt and fear.

Part of this process was to start to take responsibility for my health and I began to have medical checkups, something I had neglected in the past.

In 2016, six years after I was introduced to Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine, I was diagnosed with chronic heart disease.  I had four blocked heart arteries, the main ones severely blocked.

This was a shock to me, to my friends and family and even the doctors, who were puzzled as I presented as a healthy, vibrant 71-year-old woman. A very different person than I had been six years previously. The angiogram pictures revealed to me someone who had been contracted for a long time by not allowing love to flow in and out of their heart.

I was offered a procedure where the cardiologist would drill the blocked calcium from my arteries and insert metal stents to hold the arteries open.   The blockages were so massive that the procedure ended up taking over three hours, an unusually long time.

It took me some time to come to terms with and accept this diagnosis and the subsequent procedure as I believed myself to be super healthy by this stage of my life, but because I had learnt to “read” what my body was telling me, I was able to understand that my heart was now showing me how contracted and harsh I had been living for so long.

I now have an opportunity with open arteries to live in a more “open hearted” way.

This process continues and expands as I learn to be more honest with myself and others and not live with the pressure that I need to be a “nice, caring” person so others will like me.

It is all here within my own heart, I just need to be open to listening to the true energy of the heart, not the false, emotional one that can overlie it.

I wonder what my other organs have in store to tell me?

Read more:

  1. The way we are living is killing us. 
  2. The Roseto Effect – A lesson on the true cause of heart disease. 

641 thoughts on “Opening of my heart

  1. Truly beautiful to read this and learn from as I have lived very hard and harsh. Time to love whole heartedly!!

  2. It’s a lot of pressure to be a ‘nice, caring person’, it’s in fact liberating to realise that to do so, especially if it is against one’s own needs, and for recognition, is not true care and is actually not love at all.

  3. Amazing to feel how you changed your life around. Our bodies are marvellous at telling us how we have been living. We need to stop viewing illness and disease as the enemy and instead learn to appreciate the wisdom in the message given.

  4. I still have no real concept of how much I hold back the love that is available, I know I live a lot of love, but I can feel that it is still measured on what is occurring around me, less so but it still occurs and it is well worth being honest about where we are at with that and what we choose to not express that love.

  5. Brilliant Irene – our culture is full of of hearts and so many mentions of Love, but scarce it seems in descriptions of what this actually feels like in our body. It’s easy to talk about it at length but do we feel this warmth, connection and openness in our body then? If not it’s ok to say so, so much better to honestly stop than continue on pretending everything is ok, even though your heart is shut down to the truth.

  6. I did not realise you were in your 70s, it is amazing to look at your life today, the changes you have made, how you live, your commitment to work and then to also read the health problems you have had but how you look and feel today is incredible.

  7. Our heart is one of our most important and vital organs, and though we have many expressions about having an open heart, or a broken heart, do we actually consider our heart on a daily basis? I think it’s worth investigating what it truly means to live with an open heart, what this looks like, what it feels like and what is possible if you choose such a way of life

  8. The true marker for an open heart is being able to say no to abuse but yes to the person, in the sense that we do not judge or condemn another for their unloving ways but neither do we condone these acts. We simply see that in this moment this person is choosing to behave in a certain way due to a variety of influencing factors in their personal equation and by bringing an understanding to this we remove ourselves from the hurt of it all thus being better able to remain in and with the love we are so that the other has a marker of love (the same love within them) that they can then choose to return to (or not) in their own time. The method is simple, the activity less so when we are invested in outcomes or wanting to stay stuck in our hurt and blaming the other for it.

  9. Irene you are so beautiful and sharing your open heartedness is profound and very simple to see how taking care and the quality and gentleness you brought to your every movement has changed your life and opened up your heart from the messages your body gave you. Inspirational

  10. Awesome sharing. Reading this makes me wonder about the extent of our health as a humanity, and in particular heart disease. And how we clog up the arteries of our hearts so that the flow of blood is restricted; which clearly shows us that we are contracted and not loving ourselves or others. It never fails to fascinate how we manifest these illness that clearly show us the unloving choices we are making.

  11. “… I realised that my behaviours had developed in reaction to my past hurts and fears and that I wasn’t being as gentle and loving with others as I had previously believed and I especially wasn’t being gentle and loving with myself….” It can creep up on you can’t it… how if we are bruised or feel hurt from an interaction or situation, that this has the capacity to disturb and change your movements in the body and consequently alter one’s natural expression. Just shows you how keeping your own heart open with yourself, to feeling any personal disturbances that occur, is the best medicine.

  12. Yes, you are right… when you start listening to the body, recognising that ..”“The body is the marker of all Truth” (Serge Benhayon) the body really does have a way of communicating that we do intimately understand. The amazing thing is, that once you begin to listen to the body’s signals, it is always presenting ways to support and deepen the care of you and your body.

  13. It’s only in the last few years that I have become aware of the difference between feelings and emotions and how emotions can really harm us. Honouring our true feelings gives us energy and leaves us feeling content and connected with ourselves, running with emotion leaves us drained and unstable.

  14. It is beautiful that you have dedicated time to understand your heart and your body’s communication in full, this is the true meaning of healing, as you are addressing things from the inside out.

  15. What if being deeply caring carries no emotion, emotion leaves us in a state that then makes us less able to discern and care and love for people. But for some that is too much, I guess it is for everyone to decide for themselves, but I know now that I am no longer regretful that I am not more sympathetic, as it used to be something I wondered why I struggled with, yet sympathy is yet another imposition and does not support another to deal with what is before them, but enjoins with another in the struggle.

  16. Given our behaviours stem from reactions from our past hurts and our hurts come from an expectation or picture we had that was not lived up to by others. If we expose the pictures and ideals we have then we can let go of the hurts, as we would see they were self created. Then as you are sharing here Irene we would reconnect with the truly loving being we naturally are.

  17. For me the “opening of my heart” has been more a process of letting what is not me fall away, and I am starting to appreciate more and more what that less is more actually feels like when I don’t buy into those old patterns. This is just as Serge Benhayon has clearly done and revealed more of himself to share with and inspire others.

  18. Thank you for sharing your experience of opening your heart. I’ve had the privilege of knowing you and observing, first hand, the changes that you write about. It isn’t always easy to make changes of behaviour, especially when the behaviour is deeply ingrained. However, when someone wakes up to the responsibility of their own well-being, miracles happen.

    Possibly many who read your article can make the necessary changes that they need to, deepening into a true open-heartedness, so that they don’t have to endure the medical procedure that you did. The body wants to be well. With just a little loving support from us, it will succeed.

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