The Evil of Hope

by Fiona Lotherington, Registered Nurse and Complementary Health Practitioner, Northern NSW. 

You may think that the word evil is extreme when describing the effect of hope. Yet I define evil as anything that holds back our growth and development and anything which perpetuates the separation from the truth of who we are or which delays the healing needed to return to our essence. Defined in this way, evil and hope are perfect bedfellows.

I was recently listening to a friend talk about his experience with his partner who had died many years ago from breast cancer. As he shared the details of the events around her illness and eventual death, the word ‘hope’ came up several times. Each time I heard this word, I experienced a growing sense of dis-ease, as I became aware of what a detrimental role hope had played in her illness and death.

For a moment this surprised me, as hope is normally considered to be a virtue. Like a warm coat in winter, it is used to comfort ourselves or other people when we are ‘down on our luck’. It is common to hear people say, “I hope you get better soon” or “don’t give up hope” and consider this a kindness. We give generously to charities dedicated to researching medical conditions, in the hope that a cure will be discovered.

When I looked at the definition of hope, it spoke of having an expectation or desire for something to happen or wishing for a positive outcome. Reading these words confirmed for me the evil of hope and how it could wreak such havoc in our lives.

In the case of my friend and his partner, the hope they clung to prevented them from accepting the diagnosis or the reality of the rapidly growing breast cancer.  The searching and hoping kept them focused in the future, believing they would eventually find a cure. But in reality, this chase was a distraction from dealing with the severity and urgency of the situation. Like a magician’s trick, hope distracted them, drawing their attention away from what was really taking place before their eyes.

Hope allows us to stay stuck in a loop, repeating patterns and cementing beliefs that do not heal the root cause of our illness. In hoping that ‘something’ will change, we avoid taking responsibility for these patterns we are stuck in. Instead we place our hopes outside of us and wait for the elusive cure, the great healer or the latest treatment. This outward focus means that we never look inside to see what this illness means for us or the part we have played in it. We miss the opportunity to heal the root cause that this illness is presenting.

In the end, hope leaves us surprised and completely unprepared when the reality of dying inevitably hits home.  All the denial, all the hope is revealed for what it is; illusion and delay. Suddenly with only days left, my friend and his partner were met with everything they had avoided facing. Hope had prevented them from using the precious time leading up to her death to heal and prepare for her passing.

As a nurse and friend, I have seen that there is so much to be healed and gained through the palliative care process, not only for the person who is dying but everyone around them.  Surrendering to and taking responsibility for the process, supports the looking at, dealing with and healing of old patterns, deepening of relationships and completing anything left outstanding from this life.  In this way, we are released from these impediments and left free to move on.

What better way to prepare for our next life?

Read more:

  1. What is Evil? 
  2. The way we are living is killing us.
  3. What if reincarnation is true? 

 

 

405 thoughts on “The Evil of Hope

  1. Since reading this blog I am very aware of how often the word ‘hope’ is used in most conversations and the uncomfortable, dragging sense of ill energy it carries with it and observing that this is also noticeable in the posture of the person as they are saying the word hope.

  2. So many great points raised here by Fiona about the false allure of the word hope. To me, when people say they hope for this or that it feels careless and apathetic- like a careless throwaway term to not feel and deal with the issue or problem at hand directly.

  3. “Hope allows us to stay stuck in a loop, repeating patterns and cementing beliefs that do not heal the root cause of our illness.” The same could be said for any situation where hope is given, as we are left with a question of not knowing the truth. To give hope to another is actually very disempowering.

  4. Fiona what an amazing blog, and an amazing question to ask ourselves, are we in anyway living in hope therefore not addressing reality or are we facing reality and taking our next steps bravely with truth?

  5. I loved reading about hope this morning and felt an ouch as I realised I can still sometimes slip it into niceties in texts and emails. There is nothing ‘nice’ about hope as you have shared and reading your blog I am reminded of the importance of the choice of words we use. Thanks Fiona.

    1. Yes Jane, I slip into it as a default of using hope, but it is a nicety, and I have realised that niceness is a poison that seeps out and is often encouraged in our world as a good thing when it is not. When we are nice and we are hopeful we are escaping from the reality and the importance of being truthful. Truth is our way forward, so when I say “I hope you are well” maybe I could say “it would be a fine thing if you are making choices that leave you in wellness but ultimately that is your own responsibility and I must not have an investment in it”. Of course I would never say that, but the intent is definitely different and closer to a truth.

  6. The reality of hope is giving our power away not taking responsibility and allowing things to happen without this. Understanding the true energetic responsibility we all have for ourselves our lives and everything else is paramount to the world and is very beautiful and inspiring.

  7. I used to hang my life on hope, desperately hoping things would turn out better… it was hopeless. Until I stepped into my own driving seat, working with universal medicine, life was on a downward trajectory.

  8. Hope stems from keeping ourselves small and three dimensional, not acknowledging our multi dimensionality. If we start to feel who we really are and understand our immortality we no longer need the indulgence of hope.

  9. Hope is a sign that we are resisting the call to deepen our connection. It is a way of handing over our responsibility and believing that a situation will change or go away on its own. Which of course is never what happens, for the issue only gets buried deeper, to re-surface with many more complications at another time.

    1. True – hope shifts our focus from commitment as we hand over the responsibility for our lives to an unknown outside of us.

  10. Your blog has made me notice how often we use the word hope in our daily conversations and I find it interesting how much we actually seem to rely on hope, which in truth is a total disempowerment.

    1. It is interesting how much the word hope is used in daily conversation, we are not realising we are giving our power away. It is a word we have got into a habit of using and not realising the truth of it.

  11. “I define evil as anything that holds back our growth and development and anything which perpetuates the separation from the truth of who we are or which delays the healing needed to return to our essence.” This is a great definition of evil. And it shows that evil often isn’t obvious like a monster in children’s videos, but that it comes disguised as the thing we often see as good, positive or better in life.

  12. Hope for me feels a bit like burying your head in the sand and refusing to face the reality of what is going on and what we are actually reading and feeling in the situation we find ourselves in.

  13. This is amazing Fiona, and may I add one word to this mix, which will possibly bring an understanding of the power of words and there falsities they can deliver? Slavery “evil and hope are perfect bedfellows”. Because what is happening in the world is that it is “experienced a growing sense of dis-ease, as I became aware of what a detrimental role” of the ill use of words play and how they affect our health. Understanding that slavery is anything that keeps us from our Soul connection, words start to take on a true beauty in how they truly develop our expression so we can heal! So if society “allows us to stay stuck in a loop” we see no light at the end of the tunnel. With a True understanding of words “we are released from these impediments and left free to move on.”

  14. The more I read this blog the more clearer it becomes that reflections of those living a true and living life are oh so needed as they offer a real truth in the way they live. People do not need to hope in a better future when the reflection of true responsibility is so evidently clear.

  15. When we ‘hope’ it feels so lost, and in this energy we have no idea what natural constellations we shut out of our life.

  16. Holding onto ‘hope’ gives me a sense of giving our power away. The feeling of hope to me is like an excuse to not take responsibility for what is going on and it is a delay in embracing the truth.

    1. The epitome of inaction, apathy and comfort. From the stance of ‘hope’ we need do nothing. Interesting to hear so much about it when dealing with religions.

  17. I’m very grateful that you wrote this blog, as now I often catch myself saying I hope this or that and I stop it right there, whereas before I would carry it on and on and keep hoping which as we know doesn’t do anyone any good.

  18. It is true that living in hope leaves us completely ill-prepared and at the mercy of life rather than empowered, on the front foot and informed.

  19. Yes, it is true that hope is evil as when living in an imagined future rather than being fully present and taking responsibility in the moment.

  20. What a great simile to describe the way we use ‘hope’ – “Like a warm coat in winter, it is used to comfort ourselves or other people when we are ‘down on our luck’.” It is descriptive of how we don’t want to feel the reality of where we are living.

    1. Yes, the “things will work out anyway” philosophy that sometimes even works out but allows us to avoid dealing with what we need to deal with.

  21. When someone is living more their truth and has a strong sense of self and moves in that, others get to feel how settled and full these people feel and then are given an opportunity to ask how, or to feel themselves within it.

  22. Since reading this blog last week, I have caught myself using the word ‘hope’ a number of times. It’s been really supportive to look at it each time and see what is under the use of the word. Investment, playing ‘nice’..or more simply, a lack of connection to the person I am writing/talking to and thus a fall back into lazy language. Really appreciating this pull up and what it is showing me. Thank you. The ripple effect is that it has made me look at my use of other go-to words as well.

  23. I have experienced how hope can keep me in an illusion, therefore not dealing with what is at hand. My personal experience was around having a child, hoping I would fall pregnant, but that just kept me spinning rather than dealing with what was at hand. Now having dealt with my choices and how I lead myself to this place, I no longer have the need to give birth and have looked at other opportunity to parent.

  24. There’s no empowerment or responsibility in hope. Just the ‘hope’ that things will turn out the way we want them to…. it’s the desperate clinging to the pictures in our minds of what can be and ought to be, and not what actually is.

  25. I keep returning to this definition of evil Fiona, “anything that holds back our growth and development and anything which perpetuates the separation from the truth of who we are or which delays the healing needed to return to our essence.” And I can see how hope fits well into this category because it encourages us away from finding the true understanding when something is happening. Hope holds us back and delays us from accepting the reality and learning to move forwards.

  26. “…In the end, hope leaves us surprised and completely unprepared when the reality of dying inevitably hits home…” An awful feeling to deal with layered on top of dealing with the passing of a loved one.

  27. “Like a magician’s trick, hope distracted them, drawing their attention away from what was really taking place before their eyes” What a brilliant description of the word ‘hope’. Hope is a distraction away from a deeper truth.

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