By FL, Registered Nurse and Midwife, Australia
I was never all that keen on work. For many years I saw it as a necessary evil and hoped the years until retirement would pass quickly and I could get into a laid back lifestyle that would suit me better. I had been nursing for years, really liked the patients and giving care, but felt burdened by the misery and problems I saw every day amongst patients and staff. How could I help them? I had no real clue. I was just as burned out by the ‘system’ as those that perpetuated it. From my university based training, I learned that I had to do everything right and have all the answers as often as possible, placing me under enormous pressure to be perfect. There was no discussion ever about the way in which I worked or the quality I offered to people when I walked through the door.
A few years ago I started attending the Universal Medicine (UM) clinic and met people who worked there who were incredibly dedicated and interested in their work and this was always the case at any session. I never once felt like they were watching the clock or bored out of their minds by clients. Never once did they appear to have “Monday I have Friday on my mind” syndrome. Instead I felt a steadiness; I could tell they actually understood me and they held a love very solid. Hmmm, how was this possible? Were they superhuman or very good fakes?
I attended UM retreats and workshops to discover exactly how this was possible.
I learned about self-love, choices and responsibility and how that impacts on my interactions with all others, whether I like it or not. I learned about my own state of being and how it is crucial to be aware of where I am at on any given day. I discovered that who I am when I walk through a door into a patient’s room actually affects the vulnerable person in there. So if I go to work stewing over what a colleague has done, then that goes with me into all of my interactions with others. “Oh dear – much to examine here!” I thought. But the best news of all, was that I didn’t have to beat myself up over the past, I could learn and gradually alter the way I was living so those issues did not recreate themselves every day.
I learned to enjoy building the love in me enough so I can actually bring it with me to work and my family. This was an amazing process, where I learned to say “No” for the first time ever and to honour how I felt. I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough. I have also noticed that I seem to be able to do my job more efficiently, effectively and safely when I am not wasting energy on trying all the time. I am freer to be more aware of what is going on with my patients, as my brain space is not congested with distractions. This has actually enhanced my performance of my clinical responsibilities, as I am far more alert and focused now. If I have a day at work that doesn’t feel so good, I trace it back to how MY day started…..and it usually makes perfect sense. No-one to blame, just more choices to consider.
I know with my own life now that what I am learning with Universal Medicine is very true as I see it constantly pan out in the world around me. I can see and appreciate how much people respond to me being very present with them. I notice how letting go of judgement of others frees them and reduces the tension between people. Hmmm…those UM practitioners are not superhuman or fakes, I have learned they are people just like me.
To this day, nursing students are not taught to care for themselves first and foremost before equally caring for others. It’s a sad omission from the university-based training and could probably explain the ongoing loss of the nursing workforce. For me, everything has changed. It truly is a joy to go to work now, every day gives me an opportunity to bring more presence and connection to the people I care for and work with. I no longer want to think about retiring when going to work has become such fun!
Medicine and Serge Benhayon 
‘There was no discussion ever about the way in which I worked or the quality I offered to people when I walked through the door.’ When a society trains its healthcare professionals but pays no attention to the quality of care it provides then there is something very clearly missing. Lack of consideration to our movements is the norm, but this hardens us and hardens others around us as we brace ourselves for the rough approach. How can we have dismissed something so fundamental as honouring our innate sensitivity and delicacy, especially when feeling extra fragile when ill?
FL your blog has such a wonderful openness to learning and making changes, not with recrimination or self bashing for the past or issues that come up, just more to look at, refine, change, and mostly…. to enjoy!
FL, this is an amazing sharing of how you transformed in your profession, so pertinent considering where the health care profession is going, burnt out and exhausted. I can totally relate to this, as I once was a statistic to this. I have observed many health care professionals, suffering obesity, exhaustion, and cannot wait to get out of the system – a sad state of affairs. What’s the whole purpose of working in a health care system? It is to care and serve people.
Maybe one day we will come to realise that true self care within the health care system is essential, a service provider of people in need of improving their health and wellbeing.
How we are at work is simply a reflection of the relationship we are in with ourselves. Learn to care and deeply nurture ourselves and work then becomes a by-product of the relationship.
Caroline, spot on, ‘how we are at work is simply a reflection of the relationship we are in with ourselves’. This is key to everything around us. We are so quick to blame others and yet, if we looked within ourselves, and healed the presenting issue, then work becomes a different ball game. Work then becomes fun and joyful, the tiredness is not the same, it then becomes a ‘by-product’.
For me this just highlights the importance of a reflection and having a reflection from someone in how to live differently. Just that alone brings a healing and gives another something they can work with in order to truly evolve.
There is nothing like feeling the purpose at work to bring enjoyment in.
After having a short break from being in the classroom for a little while I was back teaching in a school that I didn’t know as a supply teacher for the day. The school was intense and there was some behaviour difficulties… but I loved it. A few years ago, I would have probably come home from an environment like that and cried, but I can safely say that because of the inspiration that is Universal Medicine I have made changes to the way I live and therefore how I am at work has also changed.
And what I love about this is that it has nothing to do with things changing at work but all to do with our approach, relationship with and care for ourselves and accessing our true love for work and service. All of these things are in our hands, so there is no waiting for something else to change before we start having fun.
We can feel it if a nurse tends to us when they are taking care of themselves and has fun with work and the difference if they are ‘just doing what is necessary’ with no connection to themselves or the patients.
“No-one to blame, just more choices to consider.” This is beautiful to read and a super loving way to live.
“To this day, nursing students are not taught to care for themselves first and foremost before equally caring for others” Yes so true we are perpetuating illness an disease in the very same sector that is meant to promote wellbeing.
“I didn’t have to beat myself up over the past, I could learn and gradually alter the way I was living so those issues did not recreate themselves every day” – this is huge, and exposes the dishonesty when we go into self-critique and regretting, looking like we are being honest and sincere, holding onto the ‘I am not good enough’ thing, but actually, it is just an indulgence – if we truly cared, we would just start living differently. Simple.
The importance of awareness and responsibility are key to bringing presence to our work and through that awareness we no longer get distracted or daydream and focus on what is required and I have found we can be playful and light hearted because we know exactly what needs to be done.
It is amazing how simple things get when we are actually present in each moment. I have not mastered this yet and still get distracted by thoughts or external stimuli, but I am in no doubt where our strength and purpose lies and that is simply in being alive to and present in each moment.
Thank you FL, I once found it not so fun to go to work too. Now, I absolutely love the responsibility of what I bring and the purpose to my work. This is where the Joy comes in. Understanding the difference you can make through commitment and being fully present I am able to resolve things much sooner and support people also to be more of them. Seeing people change and light up is the greatest joy especially if they were stuck or had low self-esteem.
Learning to love the self is joy-full. I look back now and see how I would react to the littlest of things – life was miserable reacting all the time. However what I am learning at the moment is not to get pulled in to what another expects of me and to have all the answers for their gain. When we don’t get attached to what comes our way, living life is like water off a duck’s back – easy and flowing, getting on with life while breathing my own gentle breath.
The chances are, that if we wake up in the morning still feeling tired so not wanting to get up and into our day, especially if we have to go to work, the day will all be downhill from there, with misery kicking in once we hit the first traffic jam. But if we are caring for ourselves so deeply that we sleep restfully, wake up in joy ready for whatever comes our way during the day, and at work, even a traffic jam won’t dampen the joy that is in every cell of our body. And that joy is what we will be taking to everything we do and to every single person we meet.
This is a remarkable turn around! I think it really is an incredible moment when you realise that it’s not because someone is special that they live in a steady loving present way but rather that it is because they put in the true effort of choosing what they put thier energy into.
Self-care surely has to be a the fore front of any profession, for it to be carried out with true purpose that benefits all that are involved in it or are to benefit from it in some way. Without self-care, there is a breeding ground for resentment, frustration and anger that ends up afflicting anyone associated with the business/organisation.
When we can build the love enough to withstand the lovelessness in life/work without getting affected, then we know we are being of true service to humanity.
Doug it’s like nurses and other professionals in caring professions are set up to experience great difficulty, if not fail (burnout etc), because of the omission of self care.
It’s so important to share these changes because not wanting to be at work and burnout (especially in caring professions) is very high. We all deserve to deeply enjoy each day and self care is such an easy and practical way to enhance our own wellbeing and connection to ourselves. I loved the bit about moving from trying and having to know all the answers, to bringing a loving presence to people and letting them be without judgement – great wisdom there for everyone!
To know that when we walk through any doorway, literally or figuratively, what we take with us is everything we have been feeling up to that moment, is one big wake up call. No effort to put on a smiley face when you’re still feeling angry with the previous person, is going to fool the next person you are with, as on some level they will feel everything you are carrying. No wonder so many of us do not enjoy whatever it is we are doing as we are still carrying the weight of unresolved issues and trying to pretend we’re okay. Now that I know from my own experience, is very exhausting.
Thank you Ingrid for your comment, I especially noted this line about not enjoying work because “we are still carrying the weight of unresolved issues and trying to pretend we’re okay. Now that I know from my own experience, is very exhausting.” This is so common, we really aren’t taught how to understand how we are feeling and how to respond to it in a way that is healing and supportive for our wellbeing. By the time we are adults we enter the workforce very ill equipped to understand and care for our whole selves, as we have been given knowledge in education but are disconnected to the depths of ourselves as beings who are sensitive, feel hurts, carry imprints of trauma within us, and are more than just a mind and flesh. We are usually so disconnected to our essence we are also unaware of our beautiful qualities and make it all about gaining something from what we do. It’s an empty existence compared to the richness of living with and loving our whole selves.
‘I discovered that who I am when I walk through a door into a patient’s room actually affects the vulnerable person in there.’ This is something everyone should know and live, if we are affected by time or an argument etc. the quality of the care we will give when we have entered the room will be less and harming. The opposite would be walking in, in full presence of who we are, it will light up the room and will be healing for all.
Often I find, that misery at work occurs when a person or group of people feel a lack of purpose. And purpose does not necessarily mean achieving the highest goal, but rather, how each person has something valuable to offer, by their own expression, which is given the space to flourish. This is how purpose grows in the work place and how misery cannot take a foothold and control the lives of us who spend our time there.
We will see the ongoing results if self-care is not taught as a fundamental part of these professions… They are actually unsustainable
I think nurses are amazing, they have so much genuine care for people – imagine if they WERE taught to care for themselves first – that care would be even more incredible.
Yes when we start to care from the foundation of selfcare, like going to the toilet on time when we are at work, the quality of the care given will be exquisite, truly loving and graceful. Don’t underestimate the power of a nurse in the fullness who she is.
Yeh with that quality of care for ourselves it’s like our choices have a ripple effect that spreads out and touch everyone we come into contact with.
Meg it’s such a beautiful comment, what comes to me is the absence of equality, that we offer care to others but not ourselves. Yes agree in full, nurses are truly amazing people and their care is so supportive to experience, they would be incredible powerhouses of healing if they gave that same level of care to themselves!
Yes then the care would have a much deeper quality and I wonder what impact they would have on the patients recovery? Be an interesting bit of research.
Yeh true, I’m sure the benefit would not only be for themselves and the ripple effect could potentially be massive.
‘To this day, nursing students are not taught to care for themselves first and foremost before equally caring for others.’ It seems that this is a great omission in almost every professional training. Maybe it’s time to change the trend and start introducing this subject in the studies… or even in every school. Yes! that would be the best option.
It is very inspiring to feel how enriching life is when we make it about love, as it doesn’t matter if we are with just ourselves, at work or with friends and family, as wherever we are there is an opportunity to explore, feel and share with a greater connection to love.
If I am not caring for myself I feel horrible, then I take that horrible to those I work with. I don’t want to be with myself let alone share this with other people! When I take care of myself and love myself I can’t wait to be with people! and both states are infectious in a healing or harming way. It’s beautiful to see people light up when I walk through the door the more that relationship with me becomes more loving and is then shared with them.
“I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough.” To know that we are enough just by being us is something I am learning too. It makes a huge difference to working as it becomes more about just the simple things I have to know for my work and applying them with a quality of love and care. The tension and stress is way less in this way of working.
We take ourselves with us wherever we go (of course!) so if we don’t deeply love and value ourselves we may find certain work situations very difficult. I found my first months as a student nurse on the wards excruciating. However I didn’t truly learn what self love meant until I attended Universal Medicine presentations in my fifties. Just shows it’s never too late……
We ‘killed’ joy the moment we allowed a wedge to divide our work and our play. We were never designed to robotically conform to what needs to be done with all the fun sucked out of life, we were designed to bring our all, to all, in all that we do and there is an undeniable lightness of being that comes from living life in this way.
Love this Liane. Dividing our life into compartments doesn’t make sense, yet people talk about work-life balance. If we enjoy what we do we can live ‘one life.’
For some people work is for decades and play is at retirement, that’s a long time to wait to enjoy life. We can think that everything is tied to what we do, because we have lost connection to who we truly are in our soulful essence and the joy of bringing that to life in every moment.
‘I learned to enjoy building the love in me enough so I can actually bring it with me to work and my family.’ When we honour ourselves through the love that we are everything changes and it becomes a joy to be at work and be around people too, because we no longer take on other people’s issues.
It is awe-inspiring to feel and experience living the potential of who we are through developing an honouring relationship with our body and being. All that you have shared is a testament to the fact that living in connection to our Soul is what guides us to live what is innately normal and natural, bringing a quality of realness, of richness, of loving connection to our work, personal and all our relationships, one that continually offers us the opportunity to deepen and bring more of who we are to life.
To not judge people frees them and frees us … and to live in this way gives so much more space for each of us to express who we are. And I love what’s been shared here, in particular that we do not have all the answers but we just have to be present and loving with people and let each other be.
And not only that, to not judge people allows us to more deeply understand the truth of what is going on. Without judgement we are able to see with the ‘eyes of the heart’, but with it we live in ‘the land of the blind’.
Beautiful Liane, without judgement we have true sight.
“If I have a day at work that doesn’t feel so good, I trace it back to how MY day started…..” – This is a big one to accept in full, but nonetheless it is so true, as every day that I feel things are ‘off’ at work or otherwise, I can trace it back to a choice or choices I had made earlier in the day or previous night that lead to me feeling disconnected or in an anxious state. For example, not allowing enough time in the morning to prepare for work and having to rush to work on time sets one up for a day of anxiety right off the bat.
What a great sharing and huge turn around for not enjoying work. I once felt like this – i considered when i could retire to make things easier, but in this, I was not appreciating what work offers us and what we can bring to it. Only by understanding the purpose of work, can I start to appreciate each moment of it
The thing that struck me the most about all of the Universal Medicine practitioners was their solidness: their absolute knowing of who they are, their unwavering commitment to ‘being in the room’, being awake and aware and fully in the moment. Not many can say that this is how they live their lives, moment to moment, but equally, it’s not some kind of magic trick reserved for a select few. We can all decide to live like this if we want to, making self-loving choices that build that foundation of solidness and innate knowing of who we are – and Universal Medicine supports people worldwide with some great tools and people living this way as an inspiring example of what’s possible.
Years ago when training as a nurse and as a staff nurse afterwards I felt pretty miserable for a lot of the time in my hospital work. I got out, to become a Health Visitor in the UK which I loved. Interestingly I now volunteer – on a hospital ward – which I love, because I care for myself a lot more.Everyone should learn more about loving and caring for ourselves and the energetic aspect.
“To this day, nursing students are not taught to care for themselves first and foremost before equally caring for others. It’s a sad omission from the university-based training and could probably explain the ongoing loss of the nursing workforce.” Very possibly FL, as the workforce of both nurses and midwives are leaving in the UK in their droves. With the 12 hour shifts – sometimes with very little in the way of a break – it is no wonder they burn out. The same is happening in the teaching profession. There has to be another way – and there is. Voila the Ageless Wisdom teachings.
I love your student approach to life, it takes away all the sludge and heaviness and issues we make or face in life and turns each moment into an opportunity to discover more about life – rather than a problem.
When we deal with our issues we then can learn how to deal with any work issues and, once done so, it seems obvious that we will enjoy our work!
What a turnaround FL. Fellow nurses may not believe that this is possible, but you are living proof that self-care and presence works. How amazing to love your job in the way that you do, and that this is the same job that you wanted to escape from only a few years ago.
Yes, this would be a great case study, simply writing down a process that may seem, in hindsight, obvious.
I met a lovely person today who works in nursing, and from the moment this woman began talking I could see how much energy and enthusiasm she has for life and what a gift she is to her department at the hospital. There was nothing she needed to change, just her being her was enough.
It’s extraordinary really that nurses and other medical professionals are not taught to firstly care for themselves before they care for others. The system as it is, is set up for nurses to experience burnout, as no human body is designed to work in self neglect, no matter how ‘good’ or noble we feel the cause is. And I would imagine the stress and strain for all medical professionals dealing with the care of human life and seeing people everyday with pain and illness could be quite a burden in itself, so self care should really be a high priority in training.
It’s interesting this unfolding that happens when we commit to the Way of The Livingness. I used to think that I was nonjudgemental and detached from people’s stuff….and to a degree I was because I separated myself from others in such a way that I was always protected. This protection was a hard exterior that kept me even distant from myself. I was working on mental, emotional and spiritual levels but was ignoring my soul for the most part, confusing spirit with soul and getting involved in the miasma of creation.
While I was exploring the whereabouts and how abouts of Absolute Truth and Love I came across Serge Benhayon and the connection with my body became more and more to the forefront and the cerebral angle held less sway. It is taking me years to embody and embrace the love that I am from the inside and not as a concept (like a stance that I adopt) and years to begin to live this which is the Way of The Livingness. It really is like breathing new life into old bones and as those bones come to life I feel younger, more vital and more joyful and connect with a purpose for being on this planet.
“building the love in me enough so I can actually bring it with me…” Yes, wherever you go, this love is always there and life and whatever you do then has that sparkle of light and fun!
To switch our outlook from work being a slog to it being fun through simply applying self-care is a game changer. it makes sense for all industries, companies and work places to promote this way of being… we would end up with much more joy and productivity.
“I have also noticed that I seem to be able to do my job more efficiently, effectively and safely when I am not wasting energy on trying all the time.” This is so inspiring FL. When we ‘try’, are we basically doing it to please another? My feeling is yes. So by not trying and just getting on with something in a way that feels right for you, not only do we learn from any mistakes, but we also bring our own unique quality to whatever it is that we are doing for others to benefit from. It’s a win win!
This is so true Sandra… “When we ‘try’, are we basically doing it to please another? …” Catching out the behaviour of ‘trying’ is a great moment of realisation that then brings you back to you instantly. Posture changes, the breath changes, and a self empowerment returns. Giving you back to yourself.
Thank you Sandra for your comment, I was reflecting on how many times growing up and as an adult I had heard “Try your best”, “Just try”, and “Keep trying, you can do it”, etc. To constantly try and achieve something is very much championed, instead of ‘be you’ and bring that to what you do, with no trying necessary as it’s the quality of who you are that truly supports the world in whatever you choose to do.
I remember years ago Serge shared that he loved marmite on toast and that he loved connecting to people more, so he didn’t eat marmite on toast. And in that moment my world came crashing down as I realised he wasn’t special or super human, as you share but that he made a choice to put connection to others first, more than his desire to eat whatever he fancied.
It does certainly come down to what vibration it is we are willingly aligning to. Is it of love, of who we innately are, and all that it represents, or is it of all that is not of love and all that this represents? There is an effortless and flow when we are moved by the impulse of love, where we are guided to live in a way that supports and honours our willingness to live the sacredness of our connection with all.
It’s not so common today seeing people working with joy and vitality. When I use the public transport I see glances off, tiredness, exhaustion, sadness…no matter the age, this is very common to find out. So I wonder if the systems that we have created are supporting us or are actually deeply harming us. Maybe we need to review how we are living with honesty and from there make the needed adjustments to bring all of us at work, at home and everywhere…I feel blessed for having the support and inspiration from Universal Medicine in my life which invites me to live responsibly with myself, it’s this responsibility that brings me the joy of life.
Awesome FL. I really enjoyed reading your experience with Universal Medicine. It’s a wonderful unfolding path that have allowed you to really enjoy your work just by being with you and bringing a loving care to your body first and foremost. I’m sure your patients are very blessed for having you there offering them the true care that they deserve.
This could apply to any job. I particularly like the part that reminds us that how we walk into a room affects the person we are walking in to see and how we start our day affects how the rest of the day rolls. Self care is definitely an important part of living life if we are not to feel exhausted every day.
We have a health system that only is built on providing the best care for the patients and how we come to this care is not in the picture. What is the quality of the care when we don’t educate and train nurses in how they actually need to care for themselves in order to truly serve the patient. Now the focus is on getting the job done and reward ourselves afterwards to not feel how draining this way of working is. There is another way, a very necessary way to keep our health system healthy and this is what you have showed us.
We have set standards in life that are actually way below what we could easily be living if we would take more care of ourselves. It is now seen as normal to have a ‘blue Monday’ and a ‘midweek dip’ or ‘finally it is the weekend’ way of leaving work, even though a whole different way is possible which is enjoying work all the time.
If we can care for our bodies and that inner connection with our inner most, working becomes such a natural expression in our lives.
” I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough” This was brought home to me recently when I went to support a family who had suffered some intensely difficult circumstances. When we hold ourselves in love and truth we are capable of holding others in that same energy and others naturally align to the way we move and to the centredness we are living.
I says a lot about the quality of our education systems in general when those that graduate start work and despite all they know actually do not enjoy their job or in some cases the life in general.
It seems to me that when we love ourselves we love our work too – and the others around us, our home lives, our social lives etc. It all stems from our relationship with ourselves – this transforms everything.
I know if I take super good care of myself in the morning the quality of my work is so much higher – and – my ability to care for others is hugely increased. It’s like simple maths – the more effort I put into caring for myself, the more the care grows in every area of my life.
It is crazy that we have to be taught to self-care, but most of the population is living in a way that is exhausting and draining them so self-care makes perfect sense as it supports the body to work in any profession without burning out.
What we allowed to happen and perpetuate jobs that service us like; teachers, doctors and nurses that can all be demanding but do not promote or teach self care?
” From Misery to Fun at Work! ”
How beautiful this is worth writing about.
For a long time I never liked soup, but if only I’d known that all of human life is pretty much like that – a stew pot of energies we are never apart from. This means however we are affects everyone else, and the other way around too. So it’s up to us to read everyday the flavour of the broth being served up and decide if we really want to partake. This is the beginning of healthy living – not simply our nutrition or food choices. Thank you FL.
It’s funny how we are often one way at work and another way at home, but there is no off switch to love. It is only us that can turn away and in that turning allow the flooding in of all that is not of such love and thus seeks to detract from it. Thus the key to a joyous life is through the consistency of our love lived. It is both as simple and as difficult as that.
Thank you FL, this really highlighted to me how we have dismissed self care, and that without it we are pushing our bodies against its natural rhythm, this blog is a great example of how when we reconnect to self care we have more energy, and we simply know what to do next in the work place.
Recently I read how there are more nurses working in the NHS system in the UK who have obesity than their patients with the same. The amount of nurses who are obese was about 60% of the workforce. I too feel that self care could easily be added to the nursing curriculum with interactive workshops to support the sessions. The Gentle Breath Meditation is something that could be hugely beneficial in this sector too.
Wow that is shocking, and it shows that adding self care to the nursing curriculum is not only important but vital for the health and well-being of the people who care for all of us when we’re sick.
Elaine the obesity in part may also indicate the emotional stress nurses face everyday seeing so many people ill and in pain and not know how to deal with the human suffering. Overeating can be a common way to seek comfort and to dull down our awareness and bury what we don’t want to feel. To me this indicates how vital self care is in the training of medical professionals as they face many things in their daily work life that the average person would find difficult to see.
How my day starts depends on how I was with myself the previous day so if I lose myself and say for example go to bed later than what I would normally do then this will definitely affect me the next day. I may get up later and then find myself trying to catch up which puts me out of sync the rest of the day! The responsibility I have towards myself and others is in every moment. I cannot get away with checking out even if it is for a brief moment… there will be consequences sooner or later!
‘There was no discussion ever about the way in which I worked or the quality I offered to people when I walked through the door.’ And in truth this should be the first thing that is worth considering and discussing, as our quality is what we bring and should always be discerned before anything else.
When you wake up feeling less than joyful, you know you have either taken something to bed with you, and/or not appreciated yourself and your life enough. These times are a great point of reflection.
Waking up looking forward to the day ahead is such an amazing feeling. Being in a body, in activity, with others around – it is joy.
It is a sorry story that we even have to be taught how to care for ourselves. Why would we not care for ourselves? We must have at some early point been taught to not care for ourselves hence the need to then teach us to care for ourselves!
Same convoluted story with trying. I used to try very hard and then realised how harmful that was and spent years trying not to try – it was all very trying until I stopped trying!
Yes, I agree Nicola. It does sound a bit crazy that we have to re-learn how to care for ourselves because this should be so natural to us, yet we have forgotten or more accurately agreed to disregard ourselves instead of loving who we are.
Great point Nicola, if we naturally care then obviously we pick up how to not care which means we have a great responsibility as families, parents and people to reflect back to the next generation a depth of care and love which means they don’t need to unlearn caring to relearn it later in life.
Indeed it is totally crazy when we consider that people have to put so much energy into learning something that harms them and then unlearning it again which is even harder – no wonder so many people are exhausted!
It’s ironic how much energy gets wasted when we ‘try’, rather than allowing what is already there to be.
We cannot try to be something we already are – love.
Nature is an excellent example of how not to waste energy. We are a part of this process, but, we continue to ‘try’ and improve something that is never needed.
Simple and powerful Vicky, ‘allowing what is already there to be’.
Beautiful FL, we are raised with the ideal that we are here to say ‘yes’ to life, but in my experience so often that yes is given to something that’s not right. We associate ‘no’ with rejection, reaction and disharmony, but actually as you show it’s essential we learn to say ‘no’ to specific energy that’s not true in others and ourselves as this is the path to saying yes to Love.
‘I notice how letting go of judgement of others frees them and reduces the tension between people’ I noticed myself yesterday fall into this one and it was my non acceptance of what I saw as selfish and harmful behaviour in someone who is very close to me. It triggered a hurt, the hurt of separation and everything we do to keep ourselves from being soulful. I reacted with anger when now I realise this was a gift and a cue for me to deepen my connection .
FL I love how you’ve turned your work around from misery to fun, after all work is a huge part of our life and its so important that we enjoy it and in turn offer so much to it.
It’s a great study on self caring choices Felicity, and how these influence our day to day working life. We accept so many things as the “norm”, yet by changing how we are with ourselves we can have a really great day including during work hours.
“There was no discussion ever about the way in which I worked or the quality I offered to people when I walked through the door.” When we do not care for ourselves we are actually very selfish, we don’t consider how we are meeting the other person and our work is more about us as in ‘when can I go back home?’ or ‘when is it weekend?’. Getting to know ourselves and taking care of ourselves does really make a difference and I found the most mundane things can be very fun and joyful because I do it with me now.
I love working and the consistency and steadiness that it supports. There is never a dull day when we approach everyday with an openness to learning and continually setting new standards within ourselves and our work.
The shadow of perfectionism completely compromises the expression of our true care and true qualities.
‘I have also noticed that I seem to be able to do my job more efficiently, effectively and safely when I am not wasting energy on trying all the time.’ I love this FL, this is my experience too, trying is a very exhausting exercise and it is very easy to go in self doubt or doubt which makes it even worse and has caused me a lot of anxiety in my work and overall in my whole life.
For so much of my life I have felt overwhelmed and as though I am being asked to give more than I have ‘in the tank’. No wonder I am moody and upset then when I set about what I have to do. The more as you suggest FL, I take care of and honour myself, the more buoyant I become. Like a balloon of self-love inside of me – every day I’m getting a bit bigger, more expanded and with plenty to share. But all this flows from looking after me, without this I find nothing truly works successfully.
It is almost criminal that self care can be an omission from any training that can result in high turnovers due to the stress and demands of the job. People are suffering and those who step up to care should truly live the care they provide before being able to offer the quality of service necessary for best practice and healing to occur. Thank goodness there are workers such as yourself in the industry to shine a light and reflect a different way to work and be with people that is deeply healing.
Ah FL, thank you – today I am feeling how everything you present applies equally to relationships too. For we can see them as difficult and tricky, full of inevitable struggles we have to navigate through. But why do we have to have all the answers anyway? Is it possible we are being crushed by the beliefs we have been supplied with of how we think life should be? We push and rail against our partners – instead of simply and contentedly living each moment from our heart. It’s great to read what you say and know if we do the work, change is not only possible but inevitable.
I have always loved working, since I was very young I was always keen to work and help others. It changed at some point, where I started looking at what I was getting out of work and not just enjoying the work and how it felt. Universal Medicine supported me to bring this back, simply working for the joy of working. Yes there are more parts to work but the overriding part is how supporting work is for me, I love it and always have. I got lost at one point but now I am back to seeing how healthy work is and it’s simply a normal part of my everyday.
I have found that what is more important is not knowing the answers but knowing that there are things I don’t know and then asking for help when needed. It’s when we don’t know that we don’t know that we run into problems.
Who wouldn’t love serving all their brothers and sisters across the globe?? The shame is that this is not what we are educated to understand; that work is precisely that.
Medical professionals are affected by this lack of self care right across the board, not just nurses. They perform miracles and give their all but very rarely to themselves.
Well worth turning our attitudes to work around. We can spend our lives complaining about everything and continuing to offload responsibility to everyone else to entertain us and give us something worth living for, but we all know that’s not sustainable. I used to drag my heals to work, for years…feeling the drudgery every day. I no longer feel this way as I accept that work isn’t about ‘have to’. It’s about connecting with people and contributing to something that is needed in the world. With this perspective we get to realise we are all part of something much bigger.
It was only when I began to really self honour and nurture myself did I truly begin to like going to work, and indeed honour what I was doing and delivering at work. In the past, it was aways about proving myself or wanting recognition, but now it is all about, service, what I am able to do and clear energetically just by way of me living me!!
Ah yes FL it’s like we’ve got our job description so wrong. It’s not the things that we do that we need to account for but the quality we hold ourselves and others with. Just turning up and letting our Love emanate out uninterrupted is simply all we need to do. So appropriate that your field of practice is nursing, for nurturing us in every moment with care and attention is great medicine for us all to live, whatever our vocation.
When we start to make self-loving choices, and change the way we are with ourselves, we become more aware of what is going on within and around us, letting people in becomes easier because we feel more confident within ourselves, and meeting and being with people becomes much more fun.
What a turn around, and what a difference this has made to your whole life. To go to work and know it as a joy is not normal these days but is actually totally natural. It just takes a little self-love and dedication and everything looks different.
Who we are in essence is ever-present as love can never be conquered. We can mask our connection to love but it truly never leaves us. And so in saying ‘no’ to what we are not, we expose the false layers that hinder our true way of being, allowing who we are to re-emerge once again, bringing to life our presence and power through our connection to love, as is our natural way.
You show us here a very different way of working attitude than we we are used to.
It should be our normal. Why it is not? Is it that many people gave up on themselves?
Without purpose anything can be boring and meaningless. With purpose everything comes alive and has depth and meaning.
This is truly amazing what you have shared here from being burned out in your job to then feeling more committed, having more energy, more awareness of how you are and what you bring to your work matters etc. I know for a fact many many people have had similar changes with their lives, including myself, from the teachings, presentations and reflections of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine and I will be pleased when we see more inspiring and integrity filled models such as theirs in all workplaces and professions, not only within nursing as you have started to bring.
Thinking we need all the answers is such a rigid way to work and live and the weight of the expectation can be suffocating. The lightness that comes from knowing we have people to call on, google to look things up and that we don’t have to know everything is such a joy to experience.
Judging others comes from how we are with ourselves. I used to place enormous pressure on myself to get things right; hence when I slipped up I found it very difficult to accept that I had messed up. Having this attitude meant I also found it hard to accept others when they made mistakes too. As I started to be more loving with myself and accepting that I was not perfect, I noticed changes towards others; I was becoming less judgemental and reactive. So if I find myself being critical and judgemental towards another it simply means space needs to be created for more love to be accepted towards myself.
“I can see and appreciate how much people respond to me being very present with them. I notice how letting go of judgement of others frees them and reduces the tension between people.” These are great points to share for any profession.
“There was no discussion ever about the way in which I worked or the quality I offered to people when I walked through the door.” This is so simple and yet so profound.
The theme you touch on here about not trying too hard or needing to come up with all the answers or solutions to a problem as a health care practitioner is a big one and a big cause of burnout I reckon. The understanding that me being me is actually great medicine in itself alongside the technical skills that I learnt in my profession has been a a game changer for how I work myself as a health care practitioner.
This approach spans over many workplaces and professions. The need to offer answers and solutions is the auto pilot that we are often trained to go into in or to put out the small fires in fear of the big fires erupting. What is powerful in this blog is recognising that solutions are not needed just quality reflections that don’t impose or expect another to be, but offers them more if they choose.
I recognize how we in our world have been choosing to build resentment more than actually loving our jobs.. it is a sad fact that many have replaced their inspiration of joy and care for pains and dispair after having experienced the cold enviroment one can come into and have experienced within themselves (by lack of care and love within their lives itself).. Hence what this blog is showing us is that we have this tendency to block it out – check out, increase our distractions and move through life, no longer truly enjoying, but actually stop committing to life to whatever reason. But, now to look from it from a bright side, we can turn that around – as your blog is sharing with us. Once we connect to ourselves again and make this our living – getting to know what we truly want and care for (very much including ourselves) – we can explore that actually all we want to do is express the love we are – naturally – and that simply can let go of that which we do not belong to – all that is not love and care we deserve.
It is the most important thing in nursing to care for yourself first and it is a shame students are not taught to care for themselves first and foremost in their education. I work as a nurse myself and the health-related absenteeism is going through the roof, this makes the pressure in the workplace even higher and it becomes a cycle of abusing our body to keep the care for our patients going. It is quite a challenging work environment but my experience is just like yours when I take care for myself I love my work, I am able to stay with myself. and inspire my colleagues.
This is an amazing transformation, and very interesting that the more self-care you introduced the more attentive and aware you are during your time at work and the more vital and self-loving you feel, which then feeds back again to the people you are with each day. This is a gorgeous cycle that just seems to grow and expand constantly.
What a shift in your attitude and a complete turn around FL .I would agree that the first thing to teach Nurses is how to self nurture. As you say we affect everyone we come into contact with by our attitude and mood.
What I have learnt is to allow others to be, I do not need to fix them or have all the answers. What I have found is as I have worked on my own commitment to love, consistency and self care, I have brought a solid presence to work. This has been a reflection and inspiration to others to build on their commitment to self love.
A nurse, or anyone who cares and nurtures themselves and enjoys knowing who they are shares this healing presence with everyone wherever they are.
Burnout from taking on stuff on from work can be very draining. Unless we care for ourselves first the care that we offer others is empty and draining.
Well said Jenny. This should be the first thing taught within all professions.
It so makes sense that nurses should learn about self-care while they learn about caring for others. Not to offer this almost makes a mockery of the profession. How do burnt-out nurses offer support to others?
‘Down time’ is a time where we lose purpose and head towards a less aware state of being. Moments in our life when we basically put ourselves to sleep for a period of time. What we have to be careful of however is that work can also be a very checked out state, depending on how we are at work. If, when we are at work we put ourselves into a ‘head down, shut down, motor through the day’ state, then we can be as checked out and disconnected as someone who is on the couch watching telly. The key in discerning whether we are checked out or checked in, is measured by the level of interaction that we have with ourselves because this will determine the level of interaction that we have with life.
Doug that’s such an interesting point that you make about how packing masses into our days could potentially lead to dementia because it is actually a more sophisticated form of checking out from life than vegging out in front of the telly and yet so many would see it as a preventative strategy from ending up with dementia.
As human beings we love to categorise everything. We portion and divide everything and everyone in our lives up. We see work as different to home and it is as a result of this categorisation that we allocate different values to everything and everyone. We often value our ‘recreation time’ more than the time we spend at work, we care more about ‘our families’ than we do about the people that we work with, in fact any-thing with a ‘me, mine or my’ gets seen differently to anything with a ‘not mine’ in front of it but that’s all part of the game of the spirit because from the soul’s perspective there is simply One Life of which every-thing and every-one is an equal part and so learning to see every-thing and every-one with equal value is an integral part of our evolution.
It is amazing how much simpler working life is when we don’t feel like we have to have all the answers. It is so much fun to just enjoy being who we are at work, and know that is all we need to do, its already everything.
Every job I have done has been joyous where I have connected with people and loved them for being who they are.
‘I learned to enjoy building the love in me enough so I can actually bring it with me to work and my family.’ I love this line FL. Its what I have learned also and I too now love a job that I used to hate. The job hasn’t changed, if anything it has become more demanding, but I have changed. Taking small steps each day to build how I care for myself is the way I did it too.
Learning to care for and nurture ourselves is critical to the quality of our work, whatever that work may be. It is also critical to the quality of our presence and connection, with ourselves and with others. Joy and fun at work, and in life, is such a gift to all. Thank you FL.
When I don’t define work to what I do between the hours of 9 to 5pm then all the parts of my day feel so much more meaningful. I also don’t have to define what I do as ‘work’ and instead it is simply what is there to do next.
How simple life is when we can let go of needing to be perfect and feeling we have to have all the answers to everything in order to be seen as doing well. It is a beautiful experience to be with someone who is super present and caring with themselves and thus equally so with all – as is, Serge Benhayon.
“I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be”.
To build and re-develop a deeper level of love and self care for oneself and say ‘No’ when it is not honouring, brings a quality within that changes that dull feeling of ‘getting through’ at work to one of joy in life.
“I learned to enjoy building the love in me enough so I can actually bring it with me to work and my family. This was an amazing process, where I learned to say “No” for the first time ever and to honour how I felt”.
Recently I’ve been feeling a vibrancy in me, as I take each step around the office. Every now and then as I enter the kitchen, I get a strong sense how awesome I am and the beauty of the day. I look around and appreciate the choices I have made to come to this point and the choices that are to come. I appreciate my purpose in being in my work place – to reflect God’s flair, colour and care. From here, it doesn’t seem to matter what task I am asked to do, my work is already done – just letting the real me shine. Thank you FL for this chance to reflect. Your words continue to do their job still today.
Allowing others to be, whether it is in the family or at work, is what I call true love. I went for my hair cut yesterday and I met a person with whom I immediately felt uncomfortable. I clocked it and paused to feel what was going on. I felt me and I felt them and realised I had left myself and gone into judgement. I also could feel the arrogance of what I had created. Being present and catching myself when I leave me is a work in progress, but when I do, it gives me an opportunity to let it go and to be loving and accepting of others.
For me learning to look after myself has transformed how I am at work and means that I rarely get overwhelmed with my clients problems’ as I no longer feel that I have to provide answers/solutions but rather by being fully present with them I can support them to work things through for themselves and let go of the outcome. This allows for so much more fun and joy in my everyday interactions and has deepened my appreciation for having work that brings me into contact with so many people at challenging times in their lives.
That old saying ‘keeping it light’ goes a big way in a workplace, especially when there are demands, deadlines, pressure and a mix of all different people who may not ordinarily choose to spend so much time together. And then if we can appreciate that we are in the perfect position, surrounded by the people that give us the perfect reflections, with work and projects that are specifically designed to draw out our best, then every day is one huge opportunity.
I agree Vicky, to see every day as an opportunity opens us up to the bigger picture, we can feel a part of a flow instead of trying to control and micro-manage life.
When our heart is not in our work, it can feel really exhausting. I have found the more present I am with myself the easier my job becomes because I am no longer fighting a fatigued body, and I am moving with a natural flow.
“I no longer want to think about retiring when going to work has become such fun!” not so many people can say that! Awesome you have discovered a way to be at work where you can bring all of you. Of course you will never want to retire when you are bringing all of you, there is just to much fun to had.
When you love the work you do, can feel that although it may be very challenging at times your commitment and consistency holds the quality that is offered to all those around you that is far greater than the product your are there to support or produce.
Yes when we bring all of us to work, we have so much fun, that there is no moment to think about retirement, but instead what’s next, what’s new, what’s the next project or plan. It just becomes an unfolding path of evolution.
How life changing it is when we are able to stop beating ourselves up “over the past”; it is the most liberating feeling, one that allows us to observe what was going on at that time, acknowledge it and then to make the choice to let it go. Holding on just ensures that the issue sits and festers and so our body is always affected and with it the quality of our lives. Now that really doesn’t make sense, does it?
When we connect to that inner core, that lives in us all, we connect to an abundance of love that will express itself though our bodies and with that, share this love with all we are with through the day. What a blessing it is to live like such, just by constantly choosing for love to be our guide in life.
Re reading this today brings with it the beauty that joy is to live. Everyone feels it, and even when things go astray, the remembered feeling of joy tugs us back again. A living way that is governed by our essence, not our mind.
It is such a relief to feel that I don’t have to have all the answers and this allows me the freedom to just be when I am with clients and thus I am no longer drained by these interactions and am free to enjoy my work and appreciate the fun that is there to be experienced in so many situations. Teaching students about self-care should come first before any practical skills are learnt because only in this way will we address the increasing issue of ‘burnout’ out in so many professions.
‘From my university based training, I learned that I had to do everything right and have all the answers as often as possible, placing me under enormous pressure to be perfect. There was no discussion ever about the way in which I worked or the quality I offered to people when I walked through the door.’
This offering is a sad indictment of our education system, which appears to be dedicated to the attainment of academic perfection rather than the gentle human touch required everywhere in life – and especially in an arena which is all about people. Yes, we need to know the nuts and bolts of our work, particularly in medicine, but not at the expense of staff and patients. And there’s little point too in churning out staff who can’t last in their jobs because of the pressure either – that’s just crazy.
Yesterday I was struggling with something at work. It was something quite complex and I had gone into struggle with it and simply wanted it to be complete. My gorgeous work colleague made a passing comment “have fun with it”. And why not? Why was I approaching it with struggle? Even if it was challenging, I could still have fun with it.
The first thing I noticed in this article was the phrase… being bored out of your mind by clients… And how, when you take the simple steps of conscious presence, this can literally never happen. Imagine what would happen if this became the norm for all counsellors, psychologists, and all health Care workers
‘To this day, nursing students are not taught to care for themselves first and foremost before equally caring for others. It’s a sad omission from the university-based training and could probably explain the ongoing loss of the nursing workforce.’ I feel you have really hit onto something here. Who wants to go in to a profession where there is so much stress and so little pay? Bringing self care and the quality that we hold ourselves in into nursing is so needed. There is a wellness incentive in hospitals in England at the moment so it is a perfect time to offer support in this area. This needs to start as early as possible in our education so having self care brought into schools by those who know and live this would be awesome.
25 years ago I took out a private pension plan. I decided that it would be great to retire at 55. At the time 55 seemed very old to me and one of the things I looked forward to then was the idea of no longer working. Well 25 years have passed and here I am at 55 with absolutely no plan to retire. Making self-care a priority has been instrumental in this turnaround.
Nurses and Doctors do an incredible job, self-care definitely needs to be taught during University and after they have left too .. it is never to late to learn how to truly and deeply love and care for ourselves. I used to have that Monday to Friday ground hog day thing going on but not anymore. Every day seems like the same, another opportunity to heal and evolve, I have so much to both learn and put in place. The one line that stood out for me in your blog was ‘I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be.’ It is that simple. If we only just do this and nothing else, huge changes within our world would happen.
Often today I hear of people who would prefer to not work than to work – or they go to work to do the ‘necessary and no more’ – this is pretty huge to consider that we have ‘given up’ on the potential of what work can be – an enriching part of our lives. It is awesome to read this blog and the turn around here FL – as it shows that when we connect to the purpose of work, then everything changes and we can actually appreciate that work can be a place of vitality, relationships and purpose.
This is so fundamental FL, ‘I learned to enjoy building the love in me enough so I can actually bring it with me to work and my family’, and it changes the whole dynamics of each situation.
I love coming back and reading your post FL as it shows that work does not need to be “the way to meet ends” or a “necessary evil” but that in truth it is something our whole essence is pulling us towards, it is however the way we are with ourselves that is key. What a great inspiration to society that work and life can be fun and joyful.
Work is meant to be enjoyable and fulfilling but I know that many jobs are totally draining Instead. There surely needs to be loving support and self loving nurturing practices put into place when the Nurses or any other health Practitioners do their training.
It is very difficult to bring joy and fun to work if we are exhausted burnt out and dislike work. How many people do we know who feel this way? It is very rare to meet people who genuinely love what they do, but through Universal Medicine I am meeting more and more people like you who are bringing fun to work life because of how you are choosing to live. I too am shifting how I work, due to being inspired by blogs like yours and people I meet at Universal Medicine.
I am sure that like you, once we know and truly feel our bigger purpose at work then work can never be dull, it can never be boring. In fact work is not only fun but it is a great joy as you see people and situations evolve and grow. I’ve certainly felt this and even though their is a far bigger picture of what I really bring its already changed my outlook on life.
Every day at work I learn so much about life. One day is never ever the same even though on the outside it may all look similar and the same tasks are repeated.
During my nurse training so many people left within the first year it was quite shocking to see, many felt un supported, I am sure if we had learnt about self care and the importance of looking after and nourishing ourselves then the drop out rate would not have been so high.
This is very interesting Samantha, I wonder if these training courses would ever consider applying self-care and the importance of people looking after themselves as part of their teaching/training. I feel it would definitely make a huge difference to the dropout rate and not only that, I am sure it would improve people’s ability to learn and work more efficiently and harmoniously.
Work is work and it will always be work – the difference is do I choose to work and have fun being with me and who I am, not just what I do, or do I get caught by the images around me in how it should look.
Thanks FL, we have become so good at segmenting life and what is usually synonymous with work is the word ‘hard’. We work hard and have then earned the right to ‘play’. To me what you have described is a reconnection to joy in your life, something that comes from within, and not based on anything you are doing or not doing at the time. This blows the idea of ‘work hard, play hard’ out of the water… and what a delightful way to go through your days.
Where we went wrong as a society was in taking the play out of the work. They are one and the same and born from a love to serve all equally in all that we do. It’s inspiring to read F.L how you have been able to approach your work from the fullness of who you are rather than a box ticking exercise that makes the hours drag and the body lag. When approached this way we begin to see that we are all in fact super-human in a very human way.
When the nursing staff are stressed and not wanting to be at work this is felt by the patients who, as well as their illness, are left feeling they are a nuisance, but when a nurse takes responsibility for their own self-care and how they are with themselves, they take this love with them wherever they go and this is felt by patients and other members of the medical team as well. The teachings and presentations of Universal Medicine are a blessing for all.
“enormous pressure to be perfect”…this seems to be a major factor contributing to stress in life, not to mention in the workplace.
What an incredible story, to me, this is front page news. With the current pressures the medical system is under due to raising rates in illness and disease, a story of a nurse being re-inspired to work with joy and dedication to herself and others is exactly what we need more of. It’s not just Nurses, many of us are burning out in our industries, we need to remember the importance of the quality we are offering people in our interactions, for that is what truly supports all of us to grow and evolve out of the mess we have all got ourselves in. Universal Medicine, is a school of teaching that offers an education on self care and quality, supporting many people to look beyond their issues and remember the greater responsibility we all hold.
Can’t agree with you more with this statement Sarah Karam. Many industries are currently dealing with high levels of staff burnout and to be an example of having fun, bringing vitality and engaging with true connections with others show a level responsibility this medical worker is willing to bring to the workplace everyday. It is people like this that are inspiring to work with. Giving another the opportunity to see that there is another way to be.
It’s easy to slip into thinking that what we do is not important – a ‘just another day at the office’ type of attitude. This could not be further from the truth, for when we begin to view life from an energetic perspective, the activity becomes secondary to the quality that is lived whilst delivering the activity. Take cleaning a toilet for an example, if it is done with love, each person that sits on it is blessed and therefore you are changing the world as we know it. If every cleaner worked in that quality (and pretty much everyone goes to the toilet at some stage of the day) what if the love in the bathroom allowed someone to connect to themselves, rather than rush or check out and what if with that simple moment of connection each day they were able to shift a long standing life momentum and then their best friend noticed that change and got inspired, and now too is changing in their way etc. etc. etc…. what if everything matters?
Work is not the enemy we just focus on it being so so that we don’t have to feel what is really going on for us. Our attitude to work or any area in our lives can be the issue. When we bring it back to ourselves and our purpose and let go of the underlying issues driving our attitude life simply flows.
It is interesting because I think more and more people are talking about self care to avoid burnout, but actually, as you have illustrated here, we can do self care for vitality. Not just physically looking after our actions but also our thoughts – “So if I go to work stewing over what a colleague has done, then that goes with me into all of my interactions with others.”
It’s wonderful to realise we don’t have to be perfect or have all the answers, just to be ourselves in full, and bring the love and care we live for ourselves to others. People are benefitted more by the love and care anyway! Until Universal Medicine I never considered the quality of energy I’d do things in, but the focus on energetic quality and self love is a really beautiful way to live.
Our job description here in this world is not what we think. The definitions and requirements we sign up to are real as can be but there is so much more than just what we see. The simple fact is we are deeply interlinked, divinely designed to work together and to combine. We pass on and communicate to each other constantly like bubbles in water, ripples in the sea, stars in the sky. We are perfectly engineered to help each other fly. Every incident or situation is here as a gift, every move or action we make is here for us to lift and support each other to know, that underneath all Love is the truth and our God given way. In presenting this reminder, we have much work to do.
It’s great to feel the shift in how you now are in your working day FL. I agree – caring for and nurturing ourselves is the missing key ingredient in all of our daily interactions with others and part of our personal responsibility.
FL a point that is true of many industries but perhaps a glaring omission in nursing is “To this day, nursing students are not taught to care for themselves first and foremost before equally caring for others.”. Given we know lifestyle is one of the most critical components to our health then it would seem that this basic teaching should be taught and practiced by us all before the work we do?
Before I attended Universal Medicine presentations I had no idea how to self-care. The most I would do is not overdo it with food and alcohol. Nowadays self-care means so much more, in fact, self-care is now my foundation upon which I can do all that I do with vitality and love.
This article is awesome, what a great attitude towards life, it just shows that responsibility and quality are key to life, your style through this blog is so fresh and clear, such a pleasure to read.
“From my university based training, I learned that I had to do everything right and have all the answers as often as possible, placing me under enormous pressure to be perfect. There was no discussion ever about the way in which I worked or the quality I offered to people when I walked through the door.” There is so much that can be commented on in these two sentences alone. Our education system does not provide a model for nurture and care, or a heart filled approach. The current model operates in a separation that comes from the mind that constantly has to re-prove itself to gain recognition, which is exhausting! Once we have subscribed to this consciousness it it is hard to see the wood for the trees! It makes sense that the quality in which we live and work is felt by everyone around us. When we can self nurture and let go of our ideals and beliefs then we have the opportunity to be of real service to those we are in relationship with each day.
It doesn’t matter where we are, what role we perform or the task that is at hand – we have a choice to enjoy that moment. We actually don’t need to solve all our ills or be cured, just to see there is always a tension at play and a pull to be serious and attached in a way, and we have always the ability to come back and just play. This, as you show FL is our true job at the end of the day.
We need to learn to accept the grandness of who we are, and not be afraid to show this at work and at home.
a gorgeous blog FL. I sometimes feel relieved when I have my days off, and enjoy spending time time doing ‘house chores’ and generally things that are seen as mundane, I wonder if I applied myself in the same way at work I would not have any anxieties or resentments about going to work!
When we are truly with ourselves, most if not all things can be fun. This has been a big revelation for me in life – thanks to Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine. What we do is very much secondary to who we are being and whenever I find myself in that ‘misery’, it is returning to that connection to myself that makes the difference.
‘I didn’t have to beat myself up’, is a great awareness. Doing so just perpetuates the issue whereas learning from the situation so we do not recreate them is healing.
This article really made me consider what the purpose of life is and how I have previously looked forward to retirment as the end goal. But actually I know in times that I have had off from work that I miss work and actually get most satsfaction in life from helping other and being amongst others. So work is not the enemy but more our attitude and approach to being at work, for our bodys love to work and I know this from how expansive and open I feel in my body when I am working hard.
I can say that I have had a similar process in the way my relationship with work has changed since being introduced to Universal Medicine. When I bring the focus onto the quality of my work and how I feel at work rather than focusing just on the actions it makes work more fun. Making life about people before the end picture/result that we can conjure up makes life feel lighter.
“To this day, nursing students are not taught to care for themselves first and foremost before equally caring for others” This is equally true about doctors, teachers – also parents – and most people. Steeped in ‘putting others first’ this belief system has to be disentangled. It is possible to prevent burn-out with the introduction of self-love and self-care, as presented by Universal Medicine.
‘Having one of those days’, how often have we said this before. This is something I used to think happened because the world was out to get me. You’d wake up, stub your toe and then there would be a series of events that would guarantee you wished you’d never gotten out of bed that day. I still have those days from time to time where everything feels a bit much, but the difference is that now I have the awareness to change the chain effect. I know now that there is a choice I can make to come back to my body and be present in my next action which I can pretty much guarantee will not follow with something going wrong. Or, I can choose to wallow in self pity and pretty much ensure that the next move will trump the annoying or inconvenient thing that happened 10 minutes ago. When things start to fall apart, it’s my experience that it’s often because we have lost our connection to ourselves and given our power away to someone or something else. reconnecting back to who we are is a far simpler way of living.
What turn around FL. I love the changes you’ve made that have a knock-on effect on everyone you come into contact with. I have also definitely received a new lease on work life since attending Universal Medicine workshops and courses. I also used to feel that working was simply a means to an end and that that it was a necessary evil. I now welcome work and approach it very differently, and it makes a huge difference.
The title in itself would make a lot of people question how can you have fun at work? FL you have reminded us that it may not be work but an accumulation of all aspects of our life that we bring to the work place that stops the fun. You have obviously made choices to work through and bring this into your work place. A great inspiring blog about nursing and work responsibility.
This is great advice for an undergraduate nurse such as myself. The way we hold and behave once we are registered is determined in our training. We are so bombarded to know the answer and anything less is painful to part from our lips. This gives the reason why many teaching classes remain silient as every student remains in fear of saying the wrong answer.
Our professions are so much more then being right, they are about bringing a deeply caring individual who is willing to learn everything that needs to be known to get on with the job that needs doing. I say learning how to be right in our professions is secondary to the standard of love and care we bring to the people we serve.
How empowering and truely life-giving to learn about self-care, loving choices and responsibility; to live these three lessons is transformative. Thank you FL for sharing your inspirational story.
So many of us moan about work and look forward to getting to walk out the door, but what if work hours are not the issue at all? What if it is our ‘free time’, our ‘spare time’ our ‘me time’ that is where things go off? For what you remind me FL is that actually every moment of our life requires our presence, care and ‘hard work’. What if our view of our 9-5 would be transformed if we stopped trying to escape the rest of the time?
What Universal Medicine presents is quite extraordinary really as it has as one of its core understandings, that hard work, really applying yourself, is actually part of how to evolve as a truly holistic human being… Talk about being the opposite of putting your head in the sand.
Work should be fun and something to look forward to, instead of looking forward to the weekend. If the latter is the case, then that asks for a moment to stop and ask ourselves: do I bring all of me to work?
The most important message that I got from this blog is the fact that it is OUR day. Everything comes back to the choices that we make ourselves. I’ve experienced myself that there’s so much Joy in looking after myself. In fact it’s in every detail of our days. And the more I take care of myself, the more I feel how much people mean and how I love to be with them and take care of them.
It’s so lovely when work becomes about people and not just a necessary evil until we can plan our escape. Every day can be lived as something worthwhile and precious instead of wishing our lives to go faster.
I love being at work to FL. I have just started a new job, being in my 4th week and I love it. But what I know is that it’s not about the job but how I am living that supports and also confirms this. This is my foundation, which has been the basis for which what Universal Medicine presents and it works!
What a before and after FL! It makes sense to work back through our day when we find that things aren’t going well. Sometimes I find that something has been lingering for a few days or even weeks and I haven’t taken the time to really stop and resolve it. Recognising when this happens is a big reminder to me that everything is energy and is therefore interconnected. I take ‘me’ to work and there is no ‘on’ switch that I can flick – the foundation has already been laid long before I even arrive at my workplace.
‘For me, everything has changed. It truly is a joy to go to work now, every day gives me an opportunity to bring more presence and connection to the people I care for and work with. I no longer want to think about retiring when going to work has become such fun!’
This statement is absolute gold and a living testimony to the truth presented by Universal Medicine. How many employers are lucky enough to have their staff feel this way!
‘I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough.’ What you say here in this comment is something that I relate to too. Understanding that I don’t have to have all the answers has been very freeing.
A very inspiring blog Fiona Lotherington – sharing a beautiful transition from disliking being at work to loving being there by the choices you outline so well in this writing.
“I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough. I have also noticed that I seem to be able to do my job more efficiently, effectively and safely when I am not wasting energy on trying all the time”.
“If I have a day at work that doesn’t feel so good, I trace it back to how MY day started…..and it usually makes perfect sense. No-one to blame, just more choices to consider.” How freeing this is to live in this way as at the end of the day there can be no stories, blame or drama just simply self responsibility and reflection. Beautiful, Thank you FL.
When we go into blaming or drama etc, the main person that this affects is ourselves and our own wellbeing. So living in this way not only supports us at work, it’s great for our health. No wonder FL is full of joy at work.
I love the simplicity of this, its grace, ‘I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough.’ I sometimes forget this and get caught up in trying to bring about change – but fall into imposing and not allowing the space for myself or others to just be. It’s in that space magic lives.
Too often I can find myself wanting to give myself a super hard time about a past action or try and change or sweeten a response. But I have realised that I am not being myself, and in that I kept burying what my feelings were, which made it much harder to then get to the root to heal what needed to be addressed.
‘I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be.’ This is a very clear and true ‘mantra’ for all avenues of life, meaning that it makes sense and can be applied as a teaching to support people to understand life. We don’t need to be perfect or know it all, just by letting ourselves be and knowing that we are in fact all knowing is enough to offer what is needed at any given time. How beautiful.
A big learning for me has been that I don’t have to be clever and know the answers for things; if people feel they are heard, respected and appreciated, they can usually work out what they want to do as their next step. Yes, I do use my professional skills and knowledge but not before the first part has been put in place. It has been something that is role modelled to me through Universal Medicine and it’s something that I am learning to bring more regularly into my work and the results speak for themselves – this is definitely the true way of providing a service. Thanks Felicity for a blog that I’m sure has a lot of meaning in various ways for us readers.
I loved reading your blog FL. what an amazing transformation in how you used to feel about work and how you now come to work with joyfulness, learning about self care and bringing that love and care to others, truly beautiful.
It’s so inspiring Jill, I agree and it doesn’t matter what is going on around us, because of the care, love and dedication to our own self-care, the joy remains.
“I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough.”
That is certainly enough Felicity, I love what you have expressed. What a gorgeous presence and inspiration you would be for student nurses.
What Universal Medicine offers to humanity is so vast, so far reaching and all-encompassing, on any one subject there is a platform upon which society can pivot and change direction… Just imagine if what this writer is writing about became the ethos of work for all of us… Imagine we would all be serving together… Extraordinary.
Here here cjames2012. Imagine self-care as foundational education through school, through any education for that matter. I know in my area of nursing, it would change nursing completely.
Yes Jennifer, it would literally change everything if every industry and commercial venture had, as a foundation, self-care for all employees, managers, senior managers, and CEOs… I imagine that decision-making would be a very different experience.
My work for me has been my playground for learning self-love, how I move and how I connect. I have now got to such a consistency with work I find it holds and supports me to a point that I feel like I’m having a session on work days. I’m now at a point that I learning to bring this to all other aspects of my life. I definitely don’t have Friday on my mind any more, which feels pretty incredible.
Felicity your blog has once again reminded us all that self -care includes caring for others, firstly because it is modelled and secondly because self-care includes bringing more understanding to building loving relationships with our colleagues at work.
‘I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough.’, I would like to see this line on a giant billboard next to the highway. So simply true, everyone could benefit from pondering on this.
The ‘Monday I have Friday on my mind’ syndrome always perplexes me when I hear it now. Where once I would have sang it loud, now it doesn’t even come into my thoughts.
This is something the whole world needs to catch onto, the more love we pour into ourselves, the more there is to overflow for others.Work does get easier and easier the better we look after ourselves no matter what the job is.
Agreed kevmchardy. It simply isn’t the way the world currently operates but is definitely the answer to how we can enjoy every moment of our lives, including at work doing even the very mundane tasks that are involved in every job. I’ve been finding that the attention to the micro aspects of myself leads to the macro part taking care of itself.
I have a picture of overflowing joy coming out of a fountain and people playing in the water below, beautiful Kevin.
I agree Kevin, everything gets easier the more we care for ourselves is what I am finding. Love supports us.
“I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be”. Yes that is certainly enough FL.
I really enjoyed reading your blog, such a very powerful reflection, thank you.
It is a totally amazing thing to turn one’s life around from the doldrums of existence to engaging in and living a rich, full and loving life. It doesn’t mean there are not difficult things to deal with but as you say FL, it does make it all a joy to be in.
Lisa the simplicity of what Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine present compared to the incredible life changes that take place is a constant miracle. It can be easy to take for granted the incredible life changing steps but by taking the time to stop and reflect on these, appreciating the differences it is indeed a change from pure survival through life (in whatever shape) to a deeply loving and committed daily ritual/cycle. I am busier than ever before but enjoy each day with a greater depth.
That is really beautiful and inspiring David.
We are amazing because of who we, are not what we do – this understanding took the pressure off the what I do, and I now work six days a week and I love it, I love connecting with people and understanding what is needed. It has transformed the way I work.
I love that Nicole. “We are amazing because of who we are, not what we do” I recently began a new role and am seeing that very thing. Being new I am on a learning curve, but what is new for me (it’s been a while since I’ve had a new job) is that I do not feel less for what I don’t know. I simply see it as things I need to learn. But the best thing is that I see what I bring very clearly, I see who I am. It’s all about people and the way we care and nurture ourselves supports everything about this.
In answer to your question Gill, an enormous, enormous difference we will make.
I totally agree Gill and Dean- if selfcare and self nurturing was taught from a young age at home first and followed through at school, life would be so different, interactions with each other would become more honest. Also, self harm would be obsolete, bullying would not occur, cyberbullying would stop- the list is endless. What an awesome loving world it could be- true brotherhood, but we definitely have a way to go.
If we developed schools in which we learned to just be ourselves life on earth would become very simple. I see this simplicity growing in people’s lives when they choose to become students of Universal Medicine.
Universal Medicine, the school of life…
We spend most of our life at work, we might as well make it a joyful, playful experience, with the added bonus of connecting to people, and who knows? maybe inspiring them. A great work day indeed.
Love that Natalie, and it highlights that work is medicine if we choose it to be.
I agree. It has always been the days when I have had great connections with people that I come home feeling the day is complete.
Thank you, I too used to see work as a chore and hardship and after having children it took me many years to accept what going to work is really about and now I cannot imagine not not working again with this commitment and understanding!
I have always found it ironic that what we considered play when we were young becomes work as we get older.
I agree Adam. Once there is no distinction between work and play, when both are truly and equally enjoyable, life is enormous fun and enjoyable and so very productive.
I love what you have written here Adam. To take this comment and make it part of our work day would no doubt change the way we work and bring us the joy we know that is missing.
You raise a great point Adam. It has been a life question for me since I was a child to ask what is the impact that losing our natural playfulness has on our minds and our bodies as we grow older?
You raise a great point Adam. It has been life question for me since I was a child to ask what is the impact that losing our natural playfulness has on our minds and our bodies as we grow older?
That’s very true, I had not looked at it like that but each day we get the opportunity to meet, connect with and share our experiences with other people, to help support and connect with them. And we get paid for it. Work that can be truly enjoyable when looked at openly.
Yes, ironic indeed. The key is to turn work into play again!
This would have to be one of the most revolutionary aspects of what Universal Medicine presents, that we actually can evolve through the simple act of going to work, and being ourselves in our jobs… How simple and yet how profound.
Thank you Felicity and Chris, I agree, simplicity is a key, complexity only complicates, so let’s all simply ‘evolve’ together.
So true Greg simplicity allows for evolution as the space is created for true purpose.
“But the best news of all, was that I didn’t have to beat myself up over the past, I could learn and gradually alter the way I was living so those issues did not recreate themselves every day.” I have found this is key to my unfoldment. It totally takes the struggle out of changing the way I live (when I remember!).
That is such an important thing to remember, Lucy. We do not accomplish the far reaching, ground shifting changes in our lives by changing everything at once. It happens gradually, choice by choice. Otherwise, we set ourselves up for the struggle.
Yes I am learning this and the beauty of appreciating every littlest loving thing I do to confirm who I am. As someone brilliantly and humorously pointed out to me today, no-one person suddenly wheeled in the completed pyramids in one day. But sometimes that’s what I expect of myself – a crazy fantasy I’ve run to both give myself a hard time and negate irresponsible behaviours that I’ll correct in a day. I have resisted the daily commitment to building love in my body but now I feel the beauty of this as well as the undeniable science.
It is that expectation that is the most harming, Karin. We expect those pyramids to roll off the assembly line like magic, a perfect and gleaming end product without an appreciation for the work that has gone into them. And thus, we expect the same of ourselves. No building, no learning, just be perfect right away. As you have said, it is a science to build a body of love, one that must be built one step at a time.
This reminds me of the saying ‘one step at a time’ – otherwise the potential to fall is greater than ever.
Absolutely, nb. And add to that a big helping of understanding that it is very likely we will fall from time to time. But as you say, if we take those single steps, the fall is not as far and it is much easier to get up and keep going.
There is an untold health crisis in our health care professionals with huge amounts of stress, exhaustion, overwhelm and burnout as a result of ever increasing demand and rationalisation of resources. It is also because there is no provision in training for health care professionals for taking care of themselves and supporting their own bodies. There is very little recognition yet of how taking care of yourself allows you to better care for another. It is health care workers like you FL who are starting to change this and it has got to be the way forward.
It really does, andrewmooney26. The crisis that has been brewing in the health services in the UK is starting to bubble over, and soon we may see the end of the NHS as we know it.
I feel that there is a great root to this problem, and that is we have doctors who are not taking care of themselves trying to tell patients how to take care of themselves. It just does not work. A lifestyle change of the kind of magnitude that is needed right now needs to be inspired, not instructed. Inspiration will come from the likes of FL who are living their health and well being, it will not come from doctors and healthcare workers who are exhausted and burnt out.
I can not agree more Naren, this does need to be from inspiration and not from instruction as otherwise we fall into the same ill as what has been happening for eons ‘focusing on others so we do not have to focus on ourselves’ a deadly way of living that never makes any true change.
An amazing turn-around, FL! Work is so often seen as a ‘necessary evil’ or something that we must get through as quickly as possible in order to get to retirement and do what we really want to do. I love your observation of not only the effect of caring for yourself on your own life, but that it affects those who you work with as well in such a positive way. Such is the power of self-care and nurturing!
A great comment Naren, and I have found it incredible how many think in this way and also how many people really do not like their job or even know what job they want to do. I have had a very different experience over the years as I have always loved what I do and I have always loved working. For me it was school that I did not enjoy and as soon as I could leave I was so much happier. I have wondered why so many people dislike work or struggle to commit to work and I feel that working harmoniously with others and ourselves has a big part to play here.
That is a really good question, Amina. I feel that there is a well-meaning, but harmful pressure placed on a lot of people when they start looking at their plans for the future and what they want to do for work. The pressure can come from lots of different areas (parents, teachers, partners, society, etc.) and if it is accepted, it can have an influence on how we view our own worth and what we choose to do for work. I know that I struggled for quite a while with identifying with what I did, both in a positive and negative way.
But, the biggest difference came by, as you say, working harmoniously with others and myself, and realising that being me in my day to day life is my job above any other thing that I may do.
Enormously powerful Naren! I see how caring for yourself in your own life transforms literally everything. It is magical, alchemical and wonderful all at once.
It does indeed, Dean! I have experienced first hand the difference that caring for myself has made in my life, and the enormous change that has come from it.
So true Dean, even the simplest act of self-care and self-love has a deeply transformational effect on so many levels within us, it certainly is ‘magical, alchemical and wonderful all at once’.
Especially Lisa when the act comes from a place deep within that knows what will nurture life – no different to the wisdom found innately in nature, that keeps all things in perfect balance.
Beautiful Dean, it is all there within us, as part of our connection to nature. It is natural to self-care, any behaviour other than that is in disconnection to what is most natural about us.
It’s true Naren, as simple as it sounds, nurturing and taking great care of your self makes you the best worker possible. The alternative of working so hard that you practically flog yourself to death to make retirement or some other financial goal does not work. Sure everyone needs to make money to pay the bills, but if we’re doing it at the expense of our health, this means nobody wins in the end.
Exactly, Dean. And nobody wins for generations, either. Because parents who work themselves to death have children who work themselves to death.
Fantastic point Naren about how generations are suffering in the same rut over and over again.
It’s a sure way to get sick too. Yet many of us still do it… There is another way and that is to nurture ourselves dearly.
Great point you raise here Dean, of how we can be invested in work for the end gain of security or time off in retirement. It seems crazy to think we can ‘flog’ ourselves and then stop and do nothing but entertain ourselves in retirement. It feels so imbalanced and lacking a true purpose.
It’s true Jenny and I don’t want my life to go that way.
Very beautiful FL how you have come round to also discover like your Universal Medicine practitioners you are the same – no superhuman powers or faking it.
FL I think I enjoy the same parts of this blog each time I come back to it, how starting your day present with yourself enables you to go to work and be present with others and ‘let them be’, observing without reacting in a nursing situation when there are no shortages of pressures and emotions to ‘let be’ or respond to – I take my hat off to you.
I keep coming back to read your words FL. What you share relates to all of life, in that when we see it as a burden or something we still need to tick the box of, we are still trapped in a small picture of what is truly going on. The work we do is universal and so are you.
It is truly ironic that a child sees a shovel as a plaything and an adult sees it as a symbol of work. Such is the illusion we live in.
Loved reading your article Felicity what jumped off the page for me was the fact that you can now see the value of being present in your day and bringing that presence with you in every interaction. I find in my own life and work this is a developing quality and the more I choose to be present the more space I naturally create to connect with both others and myself. I love the fact that you have a renewed vigour and joy for the very valuable work that you do and that this in turn is now inspiring others like me to reconnect to the joy in their lives.
Thank you Felicity. The fact that nursing students are not taught to care for themselves is outrageous. It ought to be the first lesson that every student is presented with and then self-care ought to be practiced throughout his or her years of training as a very vital part of being able to work as a nurse. That way nursing students will be ready to work at the end of their training and not totally exhausted as I observe every day.
Yes! Along with being part of training self-care could be an equal part of continuing professional development – a reminder of the merits of self love. Just the sound of 24/7 shift work rotations that many nurses do is exhausting, to not be at the mercy of an irregular routine with the support of self care sounds vital if one’s life is going to be about more than surviving the shift work grind.
Great blog Felicity, It got me pondering on before I was going to Universal Medicine workshops how I couldn’t wait for the weekend and every day at work was a struggle. Now I love going to work, seeing my work colleagues and speaking with clients, every moment is filled with joy that I can be there and do what needs to be done. A huge turnaround.
That is a huge turnaround Natalie Misztal and Alisonmoir you make a good point about retirement too. Makes me think, what are we retiring from? Is work life so dreary, draining and awful that we spend a whole life doing it to save up so we no longer have to?
I have always liked to work but I never enjoyed it as I would find problems and issues that would make work more difficult. Knowing now that work has a purpose and that it is first and foremost about humanity makes a huge difference. I no longer make work just about myself it is now about people and how we are with each other, this brings a whole new dimension and responsibility that I am embracing and enjoying. Making work about people has changed my whole understanding of why I work and why retirement is something I no longer think about or wish to do, work is now an extension of my life and life for me is about people.
The difference in the quality of the service or product that we receive from someone who is living with true joy in their job is palpable over those who struggle to enjoy it without thinking about the when it is going to end. It is not about the functional quality that we have made quality to be, but also about the true energetic quality that gets weaved into every thread of what goes into the product or service in the first place.
Wise words Joshua. I recently went to a very busy, fashionable restaurant. It was right on the waters edge, hustling and bustling with life and great food, beautiful produce and flowers for sale, cool decor, it had it all. Except service. The staff didn’t connect with the customers, they didn’t care about us and it was palpable as you say Joshua. I felt neglected and dismissed, but when I studied them I realised they are overworked and unsupported in their jobs and their demeanours didn’t match the ‘joie de vie’ of the clientele. The business was possibly understaffed, as the toilets were in an incongruently disgraceful state and only just containable chaos reigned. This tainted my experience as no matter how awesome the view, the decor or the food was the ‘functional’ quality of the over-worked and unsupported staff was off putting to say the least.
The best way to promote your business is to have a solid foundation of true quality and care. People can feel it, and they gravitate to it.
If what you share here was taught to nursing students, what a huge difference that would make. Taking care of ourselves first before taking care of others, this should be the first lesson.
Thank you FL a blog I can relate to and am sure many others can especially those in the service industry. If we could apply this to every aspect of our lives how much less exhausted would we be? “I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough.”
“If I have a day at work that doesn’t feel so good, I trace it back to how MY day started…..and it usually makes perfect sense. No-one to blame, just more choices to consider.” Love it FL, responsibility brings healing and love. Thank you for sharing how you now have fun at work through a commitment to self-love first.
I too love these words shelleyjones44. Taking responsibility for how my day has been and not blaming someone else if it hasn’t gone too well. Such refreshing honesty and wisdom from FL.
How wonderful to read FL that you’re no longer thinking about retiring. Could it be that by making the simple change to bring more self care and connection with people could make the difference between choosing to love work rather than exiting as soon as possible.
So beautiful to re-read you blog again FL. You have described Nursing school to a tee, by the time they get qualified they are already working in a way that isn’t joy-full, and is exhausting. It’s so great to hear how you changed your relationship with work, and that it is possible for us all to change to a more loving, joy-full and enriching way of working. We can all take a leaf out of your book!
“I learned to enjoy building the love in me enough so I can actually bring it with me to work and my family… I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be.” The way you state this illustrates FL how responsibility isn’t something dreary and heavy but a beautiful building process that we can enjoy and have fun with. What a powerful antidote to the rigidity and hardness of workplace misery.
What you say FL about the ‘Monday – is it Friday Yet?’ syndrome, brings up for me how often we all are living with a dream for the future or another day. Consider our offices when everyone feels this way. How beautiful then, that you are able just like practitioners of Universal Medicine, to bring this simple presence and joy to what you do. A gorgeous blog to read for anyone about to embark on their day.
Yes Joseph it is beautiful to live this way, not needing to get somewhere for relief but rather being energised whilst going about our daily life.
Such a gem coming across your blog again FL. There are two invaluable keys that I’ve also found really supportive: “I learned to enjoy building the love in me enough so I can actually bring it with me to work and my family.” and “If I have a day at work that doesn’t feel so good, I trace it back to how MY day started…..and it usually makes perfect sense. No-one to blame, just more choices to consider.” It really is a case of Love you…Love your job. This is a great example in this regular, very everyday environment.
It was really lovely to read this blog again FL. Life really is about work and we really do have a choice to make this lifelong commitment a joy or misery. Everyone benefits when we joyfully go about our day committed to connect, feel and complete whatever is needed (and what is needed doesn’t exist on the checklist we created!). It is a very divine connection to come back to and I am forever inspired by the living example of this way of living and working I have observed for over 15 years now in Serge Benhayon and his ever expanding family.
This is music to God’s ears “I learned about self-love, choices and responsibility and how that impacts on my interactions with all others, whether I like it or not. I learned about my own state of being and how it is crucial to be aware of where I am at on any given day. I discovered that who I am when I walk through a door into a patient’s room actually affects the vulnerable person in there.” And there’s more….!
If I open up and connect deeply with my eyes to colleagues, work is so much fun and so full of Love and Adoring. But if I am stuck in my beliefs or ideals about work or how others will treat me, then work is full of anxiousness for me – hour after hour. I am learning to meet people with my True vision. Everytime I choose this, it’s like my whole life changing at that moment. It’s the choice between connection and oneness versus separation and individuality.
For a very long time I thought like most people did that work was a burden. Today I am keener than ever to go work and never think about retirement. I love sharing my day with other people, sometimes it is not always as we expect it to be but that also brings a learning every time. Thank you FL for sharing.
I love this line “this was an amazing process, where I learned to say “No” for the first time ever and to honour how I felt”. This was also a huge moment in my life too Felicity when I learned to say NO. Somehow it had never existed in my vocabulary before! To avoid saying NO I used to just avoid people. This has all changed for me and it is so freeing to just be honest and honouring of myself. Learning to say NO is really great medicine!
Learning to say “No” with love and without guilt has been life changing for me. It is crazy to think that such a little word is so hard for most of us to say, instead we say yes and then regret it, or suffer in some way from the consequences. As you say so beautifully Elizabeth: “Learning to say NO is really great medicine!” So very true!
This is an amazing blog and sharing FL. I know so many people are living like that, already on Monday looking forward to Friday and watching the clock until it is time to go home. I have never had it to this extreme but at times felt it too. What I noticed was that I felt like work time was not ‘me’ time, I had to be there for my employer or customers/patients but left myself home so to speak.
Through studying with Universal Medicine and also seeing how the practitioners of Universal Medicine are with work, I have changed my way. I am learning to care for myself in every moment wherever I am. So also at work I can be me, I feel more confident too and I now bring ‘me’ to the workplace and not only I benefit, but also my colleagues and customers.
That is so beautiful Lieke and I relate so strongly! I have often believed that there is no space at work for ‘me either’. How beautiful to realise that we don’t go anywhere, we actually go everywhere we go! Your sharing is so so so beautiful I just want to say it again!
Thank you harryjwhite, your appreciation is so lovely to receive. I love what I shared as well and I love it in my day to day life. It is amazing to realise life does not have to be an hardship but can be fully enjoyed every moment.
I agree Lieke, there is no joy in hardship, but there is joy in learning 😀
Yes so true harryjwhite, with allowing myself to learn instead of having to be perfect straight away, life has become so much more enjoyable.
FL you have highlighted two things that create so much ill in the world today, firstly the perfectionism and judgment that comes in the medical profession, and that you are supposed to know ‘everything’, in very busy and intense workplace – all that can contribute towards stress and burnout, and a lot of very guarded and uptight medicos. The irony is it is likely contributing to more mistakes getting made, and even worse, mistakes being covered up for fear of the consequences. Secondly behind that perfectionism, and ‘professionalism’ there is little to no consideration of the quality in which we actually work. What we bring to our clients, how we interact, not in the sense of ticking all the professional boxes, but in a genuine connection with the people we are working with. For the client, feeling the connection, respect and being held and supported in this way can be deeply healing at a time they are most vulnerable. Bringing that connection to ourselves first and foremost allows that connection with others, so that there is an understanding, an awareness and a sense of purpose that we bring with us throughout our day.
I have also really started to enjoy my job since attending the Universal Medicine courses. I am a teacher and although I liked my job, there was a always a feeling of trying to get through the day as quickly as possible. There were also many days when I felo so rough that the last thing I wanted to do was be around people.
But since then so much has changed. Firstly my energy and general health has improved, and secondly I love the job so much more. As a teacher I would often react to how students were with me, as I wanted to be liked and I had the belief that if they didn’t like me I was doing a bad job. But now I just observe the students and hold them in love regardless of them liking me or not. It’s amazing to see the students open up in this holding as well. It’s beautiful!
‘To this day, nursing students are not taught to care for themselves first and foremost before equally caring for others. It’s a sad omission from the university-based training and could probably explain the ongoing loss of the nursing workforce. ‘ This is a great omission as you say Felicity. And one that I also had in my life before I studied the work of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine. And it makes total sense, for how can we possibly know how to truly care for others, with love, delicateness and tenderness, unless we know how these qualities feel in our own body.
“But the best news of all, was that I didn’t have to beat myself up over the past”. This is such a great point you make, FL, about the healing journey. It can be so easy not to make changes because we feel it is not possible to achieve anything because of what we have done in the past. But it is not true and your example shows how achievable this is. Thank you.
Dear FL it was a great joy to read your awesome blog and I have to admit that if I have to stay in a hospital I would love it to be cared for by someone who had learned to care for themselves first. It is sad that “To this day, nursing students are not taught to care for themselves first and foremost before equally caring for others.” Your employer could be very lucky to have you there as a true reflection for all your colleagues.
Nurses are our unsung heroes. It is an incredible service they offer us all and have done so through all time. I can only say how much I appreciate their dedication and love of people.
Great point Amelia. Ridding ourselves of the need to be the perfect “student” or worker, which leaves us with a built in feeling of never being good enough so our work leaves us feeling drained and overwhelmed . When we come in as a team player ready and willing to work, the game changes and so does our attitude to work.
“I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be”. This has been a revelation for me too of late Felicity. Trying has been my natural state of being for so long, I had not realised how much it was really draining me – and that there was another option! Letting go of the need for recognition and allowing all of who I am to simply be – in the amazingness it is – has been life changing. And continues to change each day I allow myself to try a little less!
I have also experienced this in my working life and have done my fare share of ‘clock watching’ before beginning to change my way of living and my experince of work also changed. What is apparent to me now is that for those we work with who may be finding work different, a drain or monotonous we can offer a reflection of an alternative. There is therefore not only a case for taking responsibility for our own experience of work through our own choices but as we have developed this awareness to also reflect this to others as a possible alternative choice for them.
Like you Michael, I think most of us have experienced this at some point during our working career. It’s so awesome that not only have we managed to turn this around for ourselves, but we also radiate this reflection to others.
When we truly begin to care for ourselves, and then bring this quality to the bedside, just that presence of deep care, is offering true medicine to another. Thank you Felicity for sharing.
Being a single parent has at times felt like very hard work and up until recently I was really struggling with my 7 yr. old son who has autism.
However this week has been amazing! I feel completely with myself and committed to staying with my body. My son’s behaviour has not completely changed and no he has not turned into the dream child overnight, however the way that I meet him in response to his behaviour has.
I feel a letting go of judgement and expectation of how I would like him to behave. I continue to hold him in love and choose not to harden. If I feel myself contract, I remove myself from the situation and then return without holding any grudges or resentment. I feel clearer in my boundaries and I am communicating what is important for us as a family. His behaviour although still loud and a bit challenging is already changing in response to this more consistent love
I am approaching the job of parenting with. It is actually feeling not like a job, but a joy and a wonderful challenge to commit to love.
Nicole, your comment and experience is amazing and I am sure I am not the only one that would love to hear more about this. Whenever I read something along the lines of what you wrote “I feel completely with myself and committed to staying with my body” and then what has shifted in someone’s life, like in your example finding you could let go of the judgement and expectations, I can’t help but get a flash of Esoteric Yoga and how powerfully and specifically it supports us to be in our bodies. In fact everything offered by Universal Medicine supports us to be in and with our bodies. Being with my body has been the basis of any lasting changes I have made and thanks to Universal Medicine I now know there are many ways we can develop this, but I’ll call Esoteric Yoga the king when it comes to developing presence in our bodies.
Your entire sharing resonates in me, but there is one sentence it stands out for me: ” I notice how letting go of judgement of others frees them and reduces the tension between people. Hmmm…”. Once we stop judging, projecting on other people, no expectations any more, we just let go, I realized, then I can really meet people and it is so much joy – no hidden agenda or hidden thoughts. To enjoy the company of other people in this state of being is just wonderful.
This is a great description of how things are in nursing and how things can be. Nurses are amazing, they work hard and care deeply for people, caring for themselves should be taught at a University level, in fact to everyone from when they begin school or before. We all need to know how to truly care for ourselves, if we did perhaps there would be far less illness and disease in the world and then far less stress and strain on nursing and medical staff.
Thank you Felicity and Jeanette, to me the future is already here with students of the Livingness bringing up children with loving wisdom and how to be “caring for themselves” first. This transpires into a nurturing, caring upbringing where they are learning true responsibility in a loving discipline and a tender way to approach life! To meet these children it is to see someone in their true power that does not hold back what they feel!
Medicine (and lawyers) get it badly wrong when they teach students to always appear to be an authority figure, to always appear to be right. As that is not true, the student and later the practitioner has to create a veneer of false confidence that makes them permanently play a role. Acting a role that is not you is hard work and makes people exhausted which makes this a really silly thing to teach. True confidence is just that little bit better.
True authority comes from living our own truth, not polluted by any taken on image or belief, but just by being ourselves. Living life like that is simple and easy as we do not have to invest in anything that we are not. Therefore it flows naturally and with that the authority of being the masters of our own life we bring everywhere we go in life.
Thank you for this blog, I agree with and have lived everything you are sharing with us. I find that I can’t work effectively or efficiently if I have the troubles of the world on my mind, I need to come back to the presence in my body and from there I am more aware and clear about what I am doing and the world around me.
Yes Gretel I find that the greatest true success I have have had at work, has been when I am not carrying the troubles of the world on my shoulders but rather have been looking after myself with great regard and care. As a result I have felt very present and enthusiastic at work to such a point that it has been a joy to be completing my task after task and embracing the next job and the next job and playing my part to the max.
‘I no longer want to think about retiring when going to work has become such fun’! I love to think this could become the new normal if everyone chose to bring all of themselves to work. It ‘s crazy to think most people don’t enjoy their work, living most of their lives counting down the days till retirement. Many days are wasted on waiting for joy when it’s with us all along. What a nasty illusion.
We’ve forgotten that the most important part of every job is to bring ourselves. In truth no job is complete or done if this component is missing. By bring ourselves the enjoyment naturally comes, as how can there not be joy if our true selves are involved?
Imagine if all doctors, lawyers, check out chicks, shop assistants, hospitality staff, people working as carers, basically people in general, knew how to love and care for themselves, and to be present, it would then be impossible for them to treat their patients/clients/customers with anything less than love. Then not only would going to work become a joy, but also being the patient/client/customer would be a joy, as there would be healing for everyone with every interaction.
A great demonstration of the fact that it is not always about changing one’s job, but about examining how we are in the job that leads to the most profound changes.
Well siad Gabriele, I’ve experienced this myself first hand, and now have a profoundly different outlook and approach to my work.
That is absolute wisdom Gabrielle as the next job will only bring up the same challenges we swept under the carpet in the last.
Spot on Gabriele – simple yet profound.
Lovely expressed Gabriele. My feeling is more and more, my job and what I experience at work is a great reflection of me where I’m at – am I joyful in myself or miserable.
Exactly and precisely Gabriele. Not what you do but the way you do it.
Lovely to read about how you have changed and become more self loving at work Fiona. I am a student Nurse and what you have described I have also experienced, it is very hard, burned out and care is affected because there such a lack of joy and stillness on the wards. “From my university based training, I learned that I had to do everything right and have all the answers as often as possible, placing me under enormous pressure to be perfect” this is absolutely true. I have found that this is the case and it is an enormous pressure for students! I personally have felt this pressure from the hospital staff, university staff and fellow classmates. There must be a reason why Nurses are getting so exhausted, and I think you have given us a very awesome description of why this happens.
Great to read your story again FL, you are meant to write. I loved the quote “No-one to blame, just more choices to consider.” I’ve noticed for me how much easier life is becoming and how much more empowered I feel simply by repeatedly taking responsibility for myself in everything that happens. It’s an ongoing process but I’m learning a lot about myself and dropping the blame/victim saga. Everything that happens in life I have a hand in, taking responsibility for myself has simply shown me how powerful I am, whether that’s creating a supportive or non-supportive outcome my power is equal.
Yes Melinda. Knowing that our choices are about more than which flavour of potato chips we eat, that they make a difference is huge. It means we can change our life if we so choose. Once we realise that we can totally transform our life through our choices, it gets really interesting.
That is an excelllent observation Ariana, there are indeed many of us living like paupers here who could be millionaires if only they looked at their treasure chest within.
Work is most definitely about connection, feeling the connection to us as a living, loving, joyful being and nurturing ourselves is key to bringing this to everything we choose to participate in life. Life is purely about work and being of service to humanity, and when one lives it with every cell of their being you realise there is no such thing as a holiday or retirement. The light stays on always.
Retirement can be seen as an amazing time to give back to others on our own terms, or it can be a shutting down of connection with the wider community, and for some it may even be simply a time where some feel they need to rest and finally escape the pressures of working life. This is why the way we are at work is crucial, so that we can simply enjoy being there, being ourselves, and bringing our deep care for other people to the fore.
With climbing retirement age of 70 years expected to become the norm in the next 2 decades we need to really think about how we are at work, every single day.
It’s all about how we feel when we are there and how we feel in what we do. It’s well worth putting the time in to develop this.
Exactly Suzanne, there is actually no way of retiring from life as we are truly connected to our beingnes, the grandness of being the sons of God. There is a continuous learning of what it is living our lives on earth together, being in constant service of each other. How people go about retirement in our societies today tells us actually what the status of society is: disconnected and distracted from what life actually is about.
FL, I am 71, retired from previous positions, but enjoying a new ‘career’ as a cleaner, also involved in the local community and volunteer work in a hospice. As long as I keep the balance between work time, volunteer time and me time I feel fully enjoyed and enlivened. If I lose the balance, and allow one area to become unbalanced, my body soon tells me that adjustments are needed. I know that change is inevitable, but as long as my body is able to serve, I will.
Catherine, life is such a joy when we stay in connection with it and do not contract away from life. Life is there to be lived and to be in service for our fellow human beings. The joy that that brings will assist us in doing whatever is needed effortlessly.
Living in connection provides a totally different way to look at the world. Where there was once the division between work and leisure (with leisure often the relief for work) there is now simply the joy of bringing the fullness of self to everything that is in front of us to attend to, with each moment being about service. I’m not quite there yet but I’m “working” on it!
I love that Suzanne “the light always stays on” when we are truly being of service to humanity.
Suzanne perfectly said, work is about true connection, with self first and then others. As we are loving and nurturing to ourselves, we bring this to everything we do, including our work. This beauty is felt by all. Life is about being of service to humanity.
So well said Suzanne. I have come to understand work in the same way, that work is life and life is work. There is no difference between one and the other, other than the things we do within it. It is how we are with what we do that is key, and this should not change whatever it is that we do.
Keeping the light on Suzanne has inspired a lovely little thread of comments about retirement in particular. If I do retire it is still a long way off for me, although every day the ‘retirement’ consciousness sits on my shoulder tempting like the devil, the holiday ‘consciousness’ is the same, it is the tendency to switch off. It is not a switch off however from tension – ‘the off switch’ creates far more tension – it is switching off my clairsentience so I don’t have to be responsible and deal with what I feel. The off switch is akin to Alice going down the rabbit hole – nothing thereafter is real, reliable and it is hard to know what is true.
“I learned that I had to do everything right and have all the answers as often as possible, placing me under enormous pressure to be perfect.” That pressure to be perfect is so crippling. It robs us of that natural beauty that flows from us when we are just being ourselves. In my profession as an educator it is also a big pressure. What’s missing is that care for self and others. If that comes first, everything else falls more easily into place and we don’t get burnt out with all the trying and striving. So glad that you are now having more fun at work. I am too.
I agree Deb, without the care for ourselves as the most important factor, the care we can offer others is lesser. This is the real gift from Universal Medicine, the love of all others created from a foundation of loving oneself. There are no losers here.
Love the line ‘there are no losers here’ FL…it is indeed a true gift, that through self love, love for all others develops. How many workshops, presentations, organisations, businesses have this as their foundation? It is this that makes Universal Medicine stand out from the crowd.
I love your clarity and honesty in sharing your journey and experience with us. It is so simple to understand and so clear. Thank You. With love Nadine
I am not surprised University students are not taught about self care and about the power they hold in bringing all of who they are and holding that in every interaction. What a beautiful and healing environment this would bring to all patients/colleagues in this field. The education system encourages a person to give their power over to the system and thus control of everything that encompasses the lives involved. This blog will bring much insight and healing to those working in the system, or patients receiving care in the system. We can make loving choices to influence our own self care when involved in the health system, regardless of whether we are workers or patients.
The point that stands out to me Felicity is ‘No-one to blame, just more choices to consider.’, in reference to being honest about what is going on and just choosing to do things differently, if there was some sort of unloving behaviour going on. To do this without self flagellation, blaming another or even some inanimate object (this one makes me laugh) is all about presence, honesty and accepting things as they are, a little appreciation of how far we have come never goes astray either.
Since attending Universal Medicine, including observing practitioners and other students, I know I have I grown in my own self. I am constantly amazed at the difference it makes to my work environment. It’s hard to put into words but the reality is that my output at work correlates directly with how I am feeling within myself. Thank you Felicity for reminding me of the enormous responsibility I have that extends well beyond considering my own needs; I know it is worth every bit of the effort along the way.
Yes, we all deserve to be treated delicately and tenderly. Not only do we deserve it, it is actually very natural to be with each other in this Precious way. But because hardly anyone’s speaking up, we are still judged by what we do rather than firstly appreciated for who we are. If we would do so, the whole world would be so much more enjoyable. It would take the burden off all of us. It would save an enormous amount of energy not to perform anymore. We’ve accepted a world where we actually hardly know that indeed we are playing roles. What is that reflecting to us? Much to ponder on for every one of us. So inspiring to read that there is indeed another way, that we do have the Power to change. Thank you Felicity, Ariana and everyone’s contribution here.
To bring all of me to work is a gift for me and all who I am connecting to on that day. I consciously check each day what I may be bringing to the workplace before I go in. I feel that this is more loving and less draining on my body but also helps me to be consciously present in what is there for me to do each day.
Felicity that’s such a turn around… I know your presence and joy would be felt around your patient all from simply taking care of yourself first. It would seem like an obvious step but the burn out statistics speak otherwise.
This is a superbly practical blog with much wisdom and can be applied to all jobs as our every action, thought or word effects everyone. The more we love and care for ourselves, the more care and love we can share with others.
Reading your blog Felicity made me consider how I take for granted the extraordinary work ethics I learnt from Universal Medicine. In the 10 years I have worked with Serge Benhayon in the Universal Medicine Clinic I observed that he treats every-one who comes to see him the same, whether that be a cancer patient or someone who has a sprained ankle.
For Serge it is people that matter and he consistently meets each client and staff member and for that matter any-body with love and deep appreciation for who they are not what they do.
I could go on but you get the gist I have been fortunate to witness a true way of working and have taken this onboard and made it my way as I now see it as the only way if we are to truly serve humanity. Universal Medicine is living now how businesses in the future will operate.
Yes there is a quality that I bring when I am present and loving. When I have a connection with me first, I can connect with others in service.
Felicity thank you for your honest blog. I am too working in a hospital and I too can confirm that until now the nurses if male or female are not learning how to take care of themselves. How lucky are your colleagues to have you there because from you they can learn through observation how to work in an other more caring way on all levels.
Agree Ester, Felicity’s colleagues are lucky to have her there, as are the hospitals where those who are like-minded nurses work. However, it is not just those who work in hospitals who do not take sufficient time to care for themselves, we see this in all areas of society on a daily basis. Hence those who have now embraced the importance of self care and who take this into everything they do, can inspire everyone around them, no matter what the setting.
“I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough”
What you have written here Felicity is so simple, yet so true and powerful.
Yes, Felicity, the practitioners are doing extremely well, are people just like you and you are just like them!
If I have a day at work that doesn’t feel so good, I trace it back to how MY day started…..and it usually makes perfect sense. No-one to blame, just more choices to consider. Ha ha funny just saw Jenny picked this line out too, it is clearly a stand out line! It’s the ultimate responsibility and that is the opposite of how most of us live, we would rather blame something else, something external to be the cause for our ills and woes. It’s a choice is very much placing us in the drivers seat of how our day will be.
“No-one to blame, just more choices to consider.” Fantastic line, that is so true and so empowering.
I totally agree Jenny, when we stop blaming others we just have more opportunity to make different choices.
That’s quite an extraordinary transformation. I can only imagine how amazing it would be to be at a hospital where everybody practised what you have… it would take healing to a whole new level. Most people do view their work as a chore, so for you to reflect how you work and another way of being with yourself is an absolute blessing to your colleagues and patients alike.
I love the honesty and self-empowerment of your quote: “If I have a day at work that doesn’t feel so good, I trace it back to how MY day started…..and it usually makes perfect sense”. Although it is challenging to face this fact – even more it is freeing us to change our lives as well as we change and develop what we bring to everyone around us. I am so appreciative to people, who are working in the health care system – more than ever, if they – as you do through your choices and development – are aware of the power of self-care in the Health care system. Thank you for your blog and what you bring to your work, beautiful, because it is transferable to every life and every work.
When I came across Universal Medicine, the first thing I learnt about was self care, making choices and taking responsibility and how all of them impact others through our interactions with them. Therefore it is so important to know where we are each day, as our whole being will have an impact on others. When we are in our true connection and rhythm and we walk in our day, this is felt by others as we leave a loving foot print behind.
Very true Amita, the love we afford ourselves gives a quality to the way we are with others and the imprints we leave.
Felicity this is a remarkable turn around worthy of the celebration it is. All the people that will now get to feel the quality which you bring with you in all you do, that would have missed out on that had you retired early and never connected with that quality yourself, is priceless.
Part of what inspires people to keep coming back to Universal Medicine is the fact that the practitioners are dedicated to living that which they present and as such there is no hypocrisy in that regard.
Thanks Felicity for sharing this, being present and loving in everything we do will eventually be a requirement for any profession no matter what it is. As someone that maintains gardens for a living, it used to be just that, a way to make money, but now I realise the energetic imprint I leave behind and the responsibility I have to this imprint.
Thank you Felicity. Why is self-love not taught in universities, when it is easy to apply through such simple protocols as you describe. Especially when the health system is known for not coping, because of the lack of staff through burnout, and the increasing rates of disease! When life becomes a way of living and working that is one of joy, because of what we have done at work, work does not drain us.
“I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be”. Felicity, I love what you write here as it is a revelation which can be life changing once embodied. Like you I found that once I started to live this way “everything has changed’ and now “every day gives me an opportunity to bring more presence and connection” to everyone I meet. Life is now a joy!!
I pretty much worked most of my life, before I started presenting courses on sound and sound healing I worked pretty much full time… I was ambivalent about it, but nevertheless responded to some ingrained work ethic. What Serge Benhayon presents about work and what work brings to us is quite revolutionary, and if governments were in their right mind, they would be totally endorsing what Universal Medicine presents, as it would be so amazing for every countries economy. What is presented is that work is an amazing opportunity for us to evolve, to know ourselves, to practice conscious presence and the conscious living in day-to-day interactions, and to take full self responsibility. What is being presented is a boon for any society, and one day will be appreciated as such.
Wow Chris, ” work is an amazing opportunity for us to evolve, to know ourselves, to practice conscious presence and the conscious living in day-to-day interactions, and to take full self responsibility” – you make work sound as though it offers the opportunity to have a continuous healing session! Never stop working I say!
This should be an essential learning in our education system “I learned to enjoy building the love in me enough so I can actually bring it with me to work and my family. This was an amazing process, where I learned to say “No” for the first time ever and to honour how I felt. I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough. I have also noticed that I seem to be able to do my job more efficiently, effectively and safely when I am not wasting energy on trying all the time. I am freer to be more aware of what is going on with my patients, as my brain space is not congested with distractions. This has actually enhanced my performance of my clinical responsibilities, as I am far more alert and focused now. If I have a day at work that doesn’t feel so good, I trace it back to how MY day started…..and it usually makes perfect sense. No-one to blame, just more choices to consider.” Wouldn’t that change our world!
“I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be” – this sounds like amazing medicine to me Felicity. Thank you.
Ditto to all you share here Felicity…from resenting going to work to now loving the opportunity to go to work and connect with patients and staff, and everything in between. No longer am I drained and exhausted at the end of a working day, knowing the steadiness, joy and presence of being with each person throughout the day supports everyone, including myself. And its simply a choice of taking responsibility – no big deal, and yet its everything.
Thank you Felicity, this is an extraordinary turn around and one I can relate to very much. It would have been very easy to dismiss those Universal Medicine practitioners as either faking it, or special in some way, and hence not explore for yourself what this ease and joy with work was all about. What a great blessing for every patient you have dealt with since to have you looking after them.
Beautifully described Jenny. “It would have been very easy to dismiss those Universal Medicine practitioners as either faking it, or special in some way, and hence not explore for yourself what this ease and joy with work was all about” it should be like this more often, I know I have had a lot of joy and learning in the ‘exploring it for myself’.
Yes Harry exactly… and once you experience this, it seems boggling that it wasn’t more obvious before. Being in the ‘struggle’ of life, and railing against ‘work’ etc. seems so normal. Discovering joy comes from connection within, and not from a desirable outcome outside us, is key.
Absolutely Jenny, Joy comes from inside us, that will be one to remember forever! When we view things as tasks or ‘jobs’ in the way that classically means then it can be very tiring. But if we view it as something we can express Joy in, well then it won’t be a struggle but it will be rather full-filling.
Exactly Harry… watching you play drums is a great inspiration for bringing joy to whatever we do. I know you love to play, but I get your point… bring this same joy to everything and voila… a glorious life!
If the greater nursing community took a leaf out of your book Felicity, and developed a deeper relationship with their own self-care, we would see a transformation of an entire industry into the providing of real care (care that is lived as well as provided) – we will get there one day.
I could feel the joy you take to work Felicity and how that must feel for everyone you are with. A great inspiration to start my day!
It’s just so easy to blame others when we’re having a bad day, struggling with work….etc. but what are we really doing when we’re blaming another? We are absolving ourselves completely of any responsibility for the way things are when in fact we are solely responsible. By blaming we are able to keep the focus outside of ourselves, maintaining our ill-behaviours in the process because we think we have nothing to do with the situation presenting itself to us. I too am learning that it is only when I look inward, take responsibility for how I feel and respond in a loving way to myself that the cycle of irresponsibility is halted.
This is a power-full observation that everyone should hear about. In fact it is not just in nursing but in every single profession where self-love when brought to it can totally turn it around.
Creating the spaciousness for people to be themselves because they are not met with judgement but with love is beautiful Felicity.
Yes imagine where we allow people to be without reacting judging and controlling them.
When I consider how much time we spend at work, how many hours per day and week etc, then it makes perfect sense to explore why so many workplaces are nothing but drudgery, if not worse. And looking at our personal responsibility and how we contribute and or further the dilemma also makes perfect sense.
As a nurse to meet with those we care for from a place of love and connection, to be truly present so they feel they are safe to open up, trust, and express is in itself a great healing.
“It’s a bit like living like a pauper all your life and finding out that you always had a million pounds all along” Love that, it puts in the ludicrous context that not taking care of ourselves but caring for others is
Love your analogy Oliver – very powerful.
As an ex-nurse I can relate to your comment about the lack of self-care during our training. We also worked 12 hour night shifts for 7 days when on the wards and this was related monthly. Not much self care there! Learning about self-care and self-love was an alien concept to me when I came across Universal Medicine. It is now part of my daily rhythm and an integral part of my life.
So many gems in this piece thank you Felicity, I love, ‘I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough.’ That is beautiful and such a great reminder for me.
For me how I feel at work depends on where I am with myself. It is my responsibility to commit to myself first and the level of self-love I am living with. If something doesn’t feel ok for me at work, if I feel the slightest bit disinterested I look at what is going on for me, not my work place.
Excellent connection there Margaret, I too now know how important it is to bring as much love to myself as possible, because this will then support me at work. It makes a tangible, unmistakeable difference to the world around me, including home, family, friends and absolutely work. For many years I thought work was the problem, but it’s really so much more how I am with myself that makes it all come together. Big relevation when that is grasped! And could have saved so much suffering if understood decades earlier.
Thank you Felicity for the reminder of the love and joy that I have in my work, not because of anything I do but because of the quality I bring. This is so important to keep reminding myself as I continue to learn more and more every day in my work, relationships and life.
Yes true Felicity and also these people at work are just like us… we happen to share an office with them but they are still someone else’s brother or sister or mother just like us. So going to work and enjoying them can be just like enjoying our families at home, sharing the same love irrespective of the context, place or the people. I think this is the secret to having real love and joy at work.
Yes it is important to remind ourselves, because the systems aren’t supportive of this loving way of being, and hence it is our responsibility to bring all that we are to them.
This is such a great sharing Felicity. How great is it getting up in the morning and showing love and care for yourself before going to work to love and care for others. It really can be that simple 🙂
I have experienced patches of not enjoying my work. My remedy is to feel areas where I can deepen my commitment and to put this into action. As a result work always becomes a more enjoyable environment for me regardless of the environment I am working in.
I can very much relate here Abby and Felicity has definitely done an amazing job in presenting this in her article. I have always enjoyed my job to a certain degree but since I have been doing course with Universal Medicine this has heighten tremendously and now I see that there is no end to how much I can enjoy what I do which has allowed me to work many more hours with a true willingness and absolute joy.
Spot on Abby, deepening my commitment certainly brings me to be more present in the moment and the more present I am, the more I enjoy everything.
A lot of us are looking forward to a time in the future we don’t have to work anymore – be it holidays or retirement. But people without work are mostly unhappy…. Can it be that it is not about working, but how I am with me and others is the key. If I love to be with me, I love to bring me and what I offer to every meeting, work, relationship, doing. Life (and work) could be fun.
Great point Sandra, lots of people are not happy at work, but equally not so happy when not at work. There has to be another way, and your question is a great start – ‘Can it be that it is not about working, but how I am with me and others..?’
Yes Debra, I found that what I do is not so important – but how I do it. And when I feel the love that I am then I bring this love into what I do – whatever it is. Because then I also do not need the work to give me my identification or any fulfillment – then work is there to connect with people and let me express the love we all are.
Oh I know this clock-watching at work and I have to say: it brought me no joy. In fact it is a reflection of my disconnection, because if I am with me and -and in truth I am very amazing- I bring my amazingness everywhere in every moment and in every meeting and work. I learned that it is not so important what I do – but how I do it.
I too discovered this by the support from Universal Medicine.
‘I could tell they actually understood me and they held a love very solid.’ At its most fundamental, Isn’t this all that every human being craves? To be understood and loved, unconditionally, without judgment? It’s this very quality, this responsibility, that lies at the very core of Universal Medicine and differentiates it from anything else. It isn’t a ‘magic modality ingredient’ or a learned method, because neither of these hold true, lived integrity.
Awesome blog Felicity, I can’t single any line out as being the best, because so much of it was awesome and relatable. It’s awesome to have the feeling of wanting to work.
Felicity I just reread your blog and feel it has much to offer people, as there appears to be a lot of looking forward to not working, in the workplaces I have worked at. It’s incredible that your commitment to your own self care and self love can change everything about how you feel about work, and everything for that matter.
I totally love what you have shared here Felicity and agree, it is a sad omission of the University Education System that all Health Care Workers from doctors and nurses to physiotherapists and paramedics are not taught as a foundation to support best practice that to care for another you must first and foremost care for yourself equally.
Spot on Suse, it is such an obvious fact that one wonders why it has been missed? As Felicity shares, during her university based training “there was no discussion ever about the way in which I worked or the quality I offered to people”. Felicity’s blog is showing another way, which if adopted would radically change the health care system for patients and health professional alike!
It is quite extraordinary that there is no discussion ever about the way in which a nurse works or the quality offered to people in this industry. You would think that this would be a priority given that you can not truly care for another if you do not care for yourself. This is fundamental knowledge for any intelligent human being. You have to question what is really going on in the medical industry that this is not the first thing a nurse learns?
I agree Mary-Louise there should an understanding that you can not truly care for another until you have care for yourself.
I feel that change is on it’s way Anne, I know there are many who feel there has to be a truer way to work which supports our bodies rather than taxes us. Watch this space, because we all know we deserve a truly caring workplace and true care for ourselves comes first.
Whilst some education of health professionals do include self care, in reality the expectations of professional standards are often so unrealistic for everything to be accomplished that self-care goes out the window.
How we experience work is totally up to us. The choices we make affect our days deeply, and this will carry through to how we are with people and if we have to pull through the day or enjoy every minute of it.
Recently I have been thinking of my clients more as friends. It probably sounds a bit odd but I always used to think of them as, well jobs and billable time. Pretty heartless I know but that’s sometimes how I viewed it.
But something has changed and I am starting to enjoy these people, all of them. They are like new members of family and I love them more and more each time I see them.
That is really beautiful what you share Dean. Seeing your clients as friends or family even. That is a big change from seeing them as billable time and I can feel that this is making a big difference in how you experience your work, instead of working with billable time you now are extending your family and building lovely relationships with them.
Yes it’s no longer about billable time but build-able time. Time to build a connection and enjoy the wonderful people they are.
This is beautiful Dean, what a delight it must be for them now to work with you in this new paradigm.
This is beautiful Dean – such an expansive and all-encompassing view of life. I feel a real, tangible shift in myself after reading this. You have opened my eyes and my heart, thank you.
This is such a gorgeous change you have shared Dean. When more and more of us start to consider clients as friends and family rather than billable hours, the face of our business world will be very different.
Dean before coming to Universal Medicine I saw all of my work and clients the same as you, something to earn money from. Gosh it is awesome to see how this is not the case at all anymore. I see my work as my life, there is no separation and my clients are all family I deeply love and care for. I so appreciate the transformation that has happened for me in my attitude to work. Thank you Serge Benhayon and thank me for choosing to see another way and live it.
Mary-Louise it has been a pleasure to watch you change and evolve in all the years I have known you. You are an inspiration to me and many other people. You have demonstrated the art and the hard work at times required for learning to appreciate yourself more and more, which I can see now helps immensely with the appreciation in and of all other areas of life, including our clients and that at the end of the day, work, family, eating, healing, rest and play are all one life… no difference between people at work and people at home.. loving one just as much as the other.
I share your sentiments Dean, as I also feel that my clients are family that I love dearly. In facts once the protection is down, simply being out in the general public shopping or walking around is a lot of fun. It can also feel like conversing with friends and family.
What I am impressed by here Dean is looking at clients as whole human beings. I find in this way I can appreciate our commonality in essence.
Dean I have noticed a shift in my relationship with my clients really challenging the notion of hiding behind professionalism. Why would I have 2 different standards in my life? Everyone I come into contact with deserves the best of me – no perfectionism, but all of my presence.
What a great lot of comments your expression created Dean, you have shown how true brotherhood works. Viewing all equally, knocking down walls and barriers between yourself and the client. Seeing how the money is the bonus at the end and the connection is the true payment.
Ha ha, good one Kim ‘connection is the true payment’… not that we do it for payment of course (and I know you didn’t mean it that way). Connection is the most natural a person can be and do (though honestly I struggle with it at times).
So true Benkt. I have slowly been building my awareness on just how important my everyday choices are and how they impact on how I am at work.
I completely agree with you here Benkt, work is what we make of it. Just like getting upset about the weather, it’s not the weather’s fault we feel sad or depressed when it rains – it’s ours. I for one now love work (and the rain!) as I have learnt that it’s my choices and how I care for myself and relate to others that determine how I approach what comes my way each and every day.
“I notice how letting go of judgement of others frees them and reduces the tension between people”
This phrase really caught me today Felicity as I read your sharing. It is about making different choices and allowing others to make different choices. Much to ponder on for me so I am able to truly accept the choices my work colleagues and patients are making.
Thank you for sharing your experience Felicity. What a joy it would be to be cared for by someone who loves their work when you are sick. What an inspiration you offer for your colleagues and patients alike.
‘No-one to blame, just more choices to consider.’ I love this sentence it makes life a learning fun.
I love this too Esther. Taking responsibility, no indulging in self criticism, just the option to choose differently next time.
As a nurse too, Felicity I can relate to what you have experienced. I was burnt out by the system in my training and chronically exhausted and mildly depressed whilst working as a qualified nurse. It was not until I learnt about the importance of true selfcare and self responsibility from Serge Benhayon at Universal Medicine that my health improved, as I made more self loving choices.
Now I go to work vibrant and energised and looking forward to connecting to patients and staff, instead of dreading it. I now know I can give quality care because I am fully present and feel the love within me. I don’t need approval from others.
Brilliant sharing Felicity thank you. I can concur with all your discoveries and changes you’ve made since attending sessions with Universal Medicine Practitioners, as is clear hundreds would also. When love lived is felt, to live without it is most definitely a chore. Taking true responsibility for the choices I make, and committing to building a relationship of love with myself first, was the biggest turning point I have made in my life to date.
Really enjoyed your sharing Felicity and one I feel that resonates with many of us. It would be wonderful for all health training professionals to have guidance and a course on self care first before being allowed out into their professions as carers. As you mention ‘burning so much energy with trying’ I’ve observed some nurses/doctors who actually look more tired/exhausted’ than the patients in the beds they are caring for.
“It truly is a joy to go to work now, every day gives me an opportunity to bring more presence and connection to the people I care for and work with”. This is a powerful statement Felicity and one, which needs to be shared with all nursing students. It is indeed a sad omission from the university-based training that “nursing students are not taught to care for themselves first and foremost before equally caring for others”. Your blog should be prescribed reading for all in the medical profession.
Early education will one day include “building the love in us”, this is so crucial to learning to free ourselves of judgement and comparison.
It is life changing to discover we can be present, connect and love everyone we meet equally. Mine has………
Totally agree Felicity, taking care of oneself is really important in maintaining longevity in any work environment. And yes, this is an important aspect that needs to be introduced in to any job in the health care industry.
“I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be”. These words apply to every situation Felicity, and when we do this it allows space for the other person to also be present and to be themselves and to feel cared for.
Yes, I love these words as well. We don’t have to have all the answers, most of the time just being present is the answer.
The perfect marker for doing the job that I am meant to do: having fun. Thanks, Felicity, that is a good reminder for me today.
Felicity, I can really relate to the distraction of ‘trying’ and feeling that as a professional, I should have some sort of knowledge and answers that I can pass onto others. I am learning to trust that it starts with the quality of self love I hold and then from there, allowing myself to simply connect with others, confident that the rest will take care of itself. There is much less energy drain when I manage to do this and definitely something I am committed to developing further.
I look forward to the day when things are very different and our self care is seen as the corner stone of our working lives in all industries. The quality of products and service with be healing in it self!
Agree Vanessa, without a level of self-care we cannot truly serve another, as our disregard permeates every thing we do and affects everyone we meet, whether in the home or in the workplace. Many studies have shown the when a person cares for themselves, then that same level of caring is felt by others and can be transformational.
Thank you Felicity for a beautiful blog and pointing out that retirement is not the time when we could actually start living, that time is right now. I often wondered what we would actually retire from? Perhaps life or is it the misery that we feel that our ‘working life’ is? I suspect you are right that it is the misery and suffering that we empathise with others and take on as our own that we would dearly love to give up or retire from.
Great question: what are we actually retiring from?
A lovely piece showing how when present there is no need for trying we can simply be and that is a joyful way to live.
Felicity what a wonderful blog. I am looking forward to tomorrow’s work day and being even more present than I was today and letting people in. Sure sounds like fun to me 🙂
The “Monday I have Friday on my mind” syndrome is very revealing of us deciding to tip toe through life in the false hope that weekends we will be free to relieve all the tension accumulated during our tip toe time because of our lack of presence.
A fantastic blog. Thank you, Felicity. The feeling of ‘can’t wait till the end of the day/week’ was an attitude that I used to have, not only in relation to my working day, but largely for my life in general. I could have stayed like that, but with Universal Medicine, I have learnt there’s another way (as you have observed in the Universal Medicine practitioners) and that I may not be able to change the world, but I can change the way I experience the world and myself. Still learning.
As I re-read your beautiful blog again Felicity, I can feel how commitment in full to the job is what has been a big support for me to embrace and fully enjoy all the work I do.
This blog has really supported me to re-align to my inner truth this morning. I found this line particularly helpful ‘I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be.’ Thanks Felicity!
Agree Pernillahorne this is gold. Thank you Felicity.
It’s great how you take a look at how your day started if work isn’t going so well – I can relate to blaming work for having a bad day, but when it really comes down to it, I can also trace it back to how I have prepared myself for the day or even to several days before! It’s that next step in responsibility to really take a look at how we are living and how that affects everything, including work, in our lives.
This is an incredible turn around and one I too share, my work used to be a means to an end, I never really appreciated what I could bring to a job or what service I could be in, I was just interested in the pay packet. Today that’s the last requirement, though still important as I value what I do, I am still learning to fully appreciate myself and what really just being yourself offers the world and you in a day’s work.
What a great recipe for staff retention – it is not the job, the colleague or the boss, it is all about us and the quality we live and work in. So simple and yet, it can move mountains.
Felicity, your blog should be required reading for anybody in nursing. It is that good, clear and useful.
Thank you Felicity, this blog is super timely and AMAZING!! I felt very joyful as I could relate a lot of what you have shared to my life and experiences- confirmations!
I believe retiring is not it- as I have observed people become very depressed, disconnected and uncommitted to life, I have heard many stories when people actually go back to working due to feeling purpose and joy working!
“I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough.” This is a great learning Felicity that can be life changing as it was for you. Being present and loving with people is the first requirement in any job or indeed with every aspect of our lives. It not only ensures that we have more fun and joy in our lives but it also inspires others to be more present and loving.
Hi Felicity I love your great honesty in – I had no real clue. I was just as burned out by the ‘system’ as those that perpetuated it. If only we were all as honest and made a stand and knew something needs to change and I’m it.
Felicity I relate to you not thinking about retirement. I enjoy the company of my colleagues and my daily commitment to students. Work has an altogether different meaning since learning to care for myself and understanding the impact I have on others around me.
“I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough.”
Feeling and knowing this truth for me has been so liberating and empowering. It allows for true connection and acceptance without judgement. It is still a work in progress, but I have noticed a great shift in me and others when I embrace this.
How amazing that you have turned your life around from waiting for retirement, to enjoying your work. That is an inspiration that many would love to know about.
A great blog on the responsibility we hold to be with ourselves in presence, care and balance so we can bring that out to the world when we serve others in the work we do. As I feel we are all really serving others in one way of service or another all equally required to make temporal life work.
I also had a great resistance to work. But now that I am working, I deeply enjoy going to work everyday. It is great medicine. My attitude to work changed when I realised that nobody else was going to take responsibility for me (Duh?) and building this commitment has been a step by step process.
” I notice how letting go of judgement of others frees them and reduces the tension between people.” This is truly something to remember every day Felicity, thank you.
This is awesome Felicity how, with honest self-reflection, you were able to stop giving away your power at work. I have felt that a person who is very with themselves and present actually feels healing just to be around. So beautiful that you have chosen to take all of you to work, not only for yourself but all others as well.
How your patients must love your care Felicity, when you are dedicated and willing to connect with them. They would feel your confidence in yourself when there is no drive or trying to get it right. How liberating and healing for everyone, including those of us reading your blog!
How can we care for another if we at first do not learn how to care for ourselves? Self-care is such a fundamental cornerstone for a true and vital life, yet we are not taught nor encouraged to abide by such fundamental principles, much to the detriment of not only our own selves, but equally that of society.
I could relate to what you have shared here Felicity so much. When trying to fix or save people I lose sight of the fact that they have the equal ability to be love and in that reach their own understanding of their situation and at the same time lose sight of my place in the situation where ever I am needed. Like you wrote – we don’t have all the answers to the world around us, only the world within us and if that space is not clear then how can we see the clarity and understanding around us? How can we best help another in a true way when we are preoccupied with the muddiness and drama within us? Thank you for the reminder that holding our center, our inner-most quality and making that our focus is our best platform to stand from.
Thank you Felicity. Your blog is a timely reminder that my day is not one to get through, but an opportunity for me to be me and to meet people, just as they are. Beautiful.
You encapsulate with beautiful accuracy how so many people view work in the absence of a connection with themselves, Felicity. You could well be talking about 90%+ of the population, if not more. What a fabulous sharing to show how you transformed your own life from one where work was a necessity into a life where work is a joy. Totally inspiring!
Hi Felicity, I love what you have written here…
I can feel how as I deepen the responsibility I have for myself and my own care, this enables me to responsibly and truly care for others. When I am irresponsible with my livingness in some way I find truly and honestly giving care to others more difficult, I end up going into tasks mode and doing good rather than lovingly caring for another the way I care for myself.
A great sharing Felicity. ” I discovered that who I am when I walk through a door into a patient’s room actually affects the vulnerable person in there.” This sentence brings us right back to personal responsibility and highlights that how we are with ourselves affects others too. A great reminder, thank you.
Well said Beverley – a great reminder indeed: How I am with myself affects everybody around me. When I am loving and accepting of myself that allows others around me to be that too.
This is a very revealing article Felicity. When you are feeling unwell and vulnerable in a hospital bed you are very sensitive to how everyone is feeling who visits your bedside and cares for you. To be nursed by someone who feels a joy in their connection to themselves and others is a healing in itself.
‘From my university based training, I learned that I had to do everything right and have all the answers as often as possible, placing me under enormous pressure to be perfect’ This is such a great learning to unlearn and let go of. I can feel the lightness and joy as you share how this is for you. Thank you Fiona.
I so agree, Fiona! It took me ages to let go of the idea that I had to be everyone’s ‘Delphic oracle!’ It doesnt help the oracle seekers either, as it keeps them in a ‘less than you’ position. Such a mutually disempowering trap!
Here I am reading your blog again – and I feel that’s no coincidence! Thank you Felicity for more insight and a deepening. This passage felt really beautiful to read this morning ‘I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be’ – this sums up for me the beauty of living life simply, as it offers everyone the freedom to be present with themselves and to not become caught up in all the complications that occur when we try to live two lives at once – mine and the other person.
I guess that’s why we get so tired, Susan, when we try to live two ( or more ) lives at the same time! Thank you for exposing this simple truth.
Life has felt like that in the past, like I’m living several different lives, one way with one person, another way with another person and so on. But through my understanding gathered with Universal Medicine I see that I can become the same one person in all parts of my life and very, very become much more myself.
That feels so true Coleen. It does prompt me to wonder how we have come to live in such a complicated and complex way when simplicity serves us so well. When we begin to trust ourselves and realise that we are enough, we don’t need to know all the intricacies of how other people run their lives. We just need to understand and accept them as another Son of God.
Very true Susan, I have experienced when two identities are lived your life is also lived in a lot of ifs and buts. For example what would this side of my identify do, should I laugh at that joke?
Much more simple to be yourself and any interaction is natural and not draining.
What stands out from your article is that how we are in every moment impacts everyone. I brought self love into my life since finding Universal Medicine, it has greatly changed my life and how I am with others, knowing I have a responsibility with this with everyone.
Yes it’s true, it makes a huge difference to everyone how we conduct ourselves. Every single person makes a difference.
It’s lovely to read this Felicity and feel the power of your revelations and the changes you made as a result. It must have an impact not only on your patients but on your colleagues as well – I’m sure they must have been inspired themselves after witnessing the difference in you.
Your blog really hit the spot this morning, Felicity as I am looking for a part time job after having been retired for 10 years. At the time of finishing work I was looking forward to relaxing and having time for myself. In the beginning I needed that rest because of the way that I worked. Now I feel I am ready for a new start with a very different attitude and lifestyle. I feel I am now in a position where I will enjoy being part of a team that is serving the public and engaging with people, and it feels as though work can now be part of our life even after we have reached retirement age. If we can work in a way where we are not draining our energetic resources and can hold our energy at a more constant level there is no reason to give up working because we have reached a certain age.
This is awesome Susan – It will be great to take all that you have learnt into a new workplace.
It is awesome and none of these changes would have taken place if I had not met Serge Benhayon.
I enjoyed your work day along with you Felicity, as I read your blog. I was inspired hearing about how you have developed your presence with people and what is happening through that fact. I also love your observation that with lack of judgment people are freed and tension between people evaporates.
Felicity, I can truly feel the joy in you taking your presence and yourself to work now. I love how you share about just simply being present in the moment and then take yourself to people. That to me is how we should be living all the time, what quality we would bring in everything be it cooking breakfast, getting ready, going to work etc.. everyday things that just would feel amazing. We would not be clouded and distractions would not have a home to live in our heads 🙂 Much to ponder on with just being present in all we do. Thank you for this treasure of sharing. Yes, Universal Medicine really showed me that way, on what it means to be present in the moment that’s in front of you now, rather than living in past or future!
I loved coming back to your article Felicity and all the comments from peoples own experiences. I was reflecting on the difference in my work these days and how much more I enjoy being there regardless of the physical demands and the fact that it is constant and full on for the whole time I am there. The game changer for me was knowing there is so much more to work than just turning up. How I am with the customers,, my work colleagues how I am with myself, all make a difference to my day and in turn how other people will enjoy their day.
Thank you so much for sharing Felicity. Im on my clinical placement now as a Nurse and everything you have said is true. I’ve found that when I care for myself first and then bring that care to others, I can truly help them. We certainly aren’t asked to be loving and present when we do things, the norm is certainly being stressed, inflexible in your body and tough. I’ve found that’s not the Nurse I want to be, as I don’t want to wait another 50 or 60 years until I can have joy, I want it now.
There’s so much gold in this article! ‘I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be.’ I love feeling the truth of this in my day.
As a third year nursing student I can totally agree that University does little if anything toward preparing a nursing students self-care. The quality of our being is certainly not considered at university, only that we pay the money, show up to some classes, hand our work in on time and get a pass! They have done studies that actually show nursing students are one of the highest in stress and anxiety. I have seen many students become overweight and or lose their sparkle. And then you go into the system and many are exhausted and live on coffee and chocolate. Thank God for Universal Medicine and the many now walking living talking examples of bright dedicated hard working tender and warm people like yourself Felicity that show there is another way and it’s vital and fun!
As a health care professional I have in the past put so much pressure on myself to have all the answers for my clients all of the time. The more I bring a deeply caring and nurturing way of being to my body, the easier I feel it is to say to clients “I don’t have all the answers” and to appreciate that connecting and truly listening to a person brings much value to their situation.
So true Felicity – what you say about waiting for retirement to kick back and have fun is a common thing in society. And the Monday-itis! I see this all the time at work…Thankfully this is something that I have been able to turn around as well – I look forwards to work on Mondays and I actually have trouble seeing myself retiring too!? Yes changing perhaps the type of work I do so that it is less strain on the body as it eventually ages and needs such adjustments, but as long as I can be active and useful I see myself as continuing to play an important role in society. Every person brings something to us all that is invaluable and any time someone steps back and hides this from the world, we all miss out!
Living with the principles of self love and self care, honouring our bodies and treating all equally has so many benefits. Your changes are inspiring Felicity. And from the above comments, here is a group of people showing there is another way, and no retirement will ever be better than committing to life, staying engaged with learning and being dedicated to people.
This is great Felicity and very important actually how much enjoying what you do supports you and your day…. Work is Medicine is a quote by Serge Benhayon and just the other day I found myself saying this out loud while enjoying my day.
Yes Felicity, I see my work days as very different now. No longer a chore but part of the joy in living each day with me. I cannot always hold myself in presence but I don’t beat myself up about it- I move on to the next moment and feel what could be different. An amazing way to live!
If we are longing for the weekend it would be wise to ask ourselves why.
My observations in the building industry are that a super high percentage of the workers have the “Monday I have Friday on my mind syndrome”. I used to be in that percentage bracket and I thought it was because I didn’t like my job anymore but that was not the case. I also see it in some of my mates who don’t want to be at work, they take a lot of care in what they are doing and do great work, but work is seen as a means to an end, a necessary evil. When I was in my early twenties I wanted to retire when I was thirty five, I am nearing forty now and have no intentions of retiring, ever.
Tony, while you may one day retire from actively building and take on a different role in the building industry, it is very obvious to all who know you that you will never retire from life! Already you are a shiny light in the building industry and you have only just begun. If you can talk on self-care at a major building conference what more can you do?
It is so common to get stuck in the Monday to Friday mentality. So much power is given to the day of the week that it happens to be. Does it not make more sense to live and work in a way that means you feel joyful every day?
The workplace focuses so much on output and what we do but misses the point that there is a quality that needs to be present. When we focus on being connected to each other, as you point out Felicity, something happens that is far more incredible.
This is so incredible Felicity, and so so needed in the workforce. I used to go to work and just get it done.. couldn’t wait to get home and sit on the lounge. This has changed so much since attending Universal medicine. I now understand the enormity of what I bring to my job when I am actually there and present with people. It has totally changed my perspective knowing that the energy I work and live in affects everybody, so why not be clear, present and caring?!
I’ve also noticed that since taking more care with myself and how I start the day has had very real and positive effect on my relationship with work. Being at work is so vastly different these days thanks to the teachings of Serge Benhayon & Universal Medicine.
That it is possible to build a body of love in this day and age is amazing, that we can go and see practitioners who live this is truly a blessing.
We have walked so much the same path, Felicity. University trained me to deliver the goods. It left me empty, insecure and ragged as a human being. I lived for my hobbies, and interests. I can recall co-ordinating dance steps during the process of carrying out dental procedures…oh dear!
Universal Medicine is the only organisation that makes it clear no polish, no bright and cheery front, no snazzy presentation can deal with that ragged being. Suppresses it? Yes. Covers it up? Maybe. Heals it? Never.
With true healing, true joy in work bubbles up. All else is a draining pretence that leaves the practitioner and patient less.
Awesome Felicity it is the same for me too. I love going to work – a true Joy and loving experience. The opportunity to really connect with people and have the most amazing interactions. It feels like it is not work but just connections. Issues are resolved together and very simply from the connection.
I love this sentence “I’m now able to do my job more efficiently, effectively and safely when I am not wasting energy on trying all the time..” This is absolute gold and exposes how trying is really just a distraction we choose to not have to shine!
I love the down to earth expression Felicity! It really is a very practical step by step process that is taught by Universal Medicine, to bring self care and self love into our lives and work places. And as you say, a solid and steady loving presence is available equally to anyone who wants to consider Universal Medicines presentations, not just to a select “superhuman” few!
You should be teaching this Felicity in all medical schools, globally.
This is just as gorgeous music to my ears Felicity. How we are with other people matters. I found like you that to be able to be with other people in a loving way, I have to first deeply love myself and then it naturally comes out that way.
Yes Liekevanhaastrecht, that’s the simple truth. Love yourself first and then you will naturally be loving with others. I have found many profound life and relationship changes by testing this theory but it still feels that I could love myself much much more deeply and completely and I am looking forward to seeing what is reflected back to me the deeper I go.
I love what you have presented here Felicity, particularly the line “I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough.” Who knew that all the striving, stress, rivalry, exhaustion (…and the list goes on..) that consumes most workplaces, could be negated by such a simple approach?!
A beautiful sharing Felicity and on reading this for a second time I can really appreciate the level of responsibility with people that you are presenting with in this blog. A responsibility that we all have all of the time.
“I can see and appreciate how much people respond to me being very present with them. I notice how letting go of judgement of others frees them and reduces the tension between people.” These are awesome realisations Felicity and a great reminder for me to give all of me whenever I am listening or talking to anyone. Thank you.
I so agree with you Felicity. My working life has transformed through the support of Universal Medicine practitioners. A simple act of changing my rhythm to go to bed earlier and start work earlier and to take breaks where needed have provided a renewed freshness to my job of seven years. I absolutely love working there and the freshness that I now bring. I have so much more clarity and enthusiasm and more of a willingness to dive in and be co-operative. It would be so beneficial if we incorporated self-care into nursing training.
I love your line, ‘I didn’t have to beat myself up over the past, I could learn and gradually alter the way I was living so those issues did not recreate themselves every day.’ As I go to work I notice little things where I become anxious. These are becoming less so, the more I stay with myself, appreciate myself and look after myself.
I love my job and I find I am loving it more. Where in the past the tasks that cause me a little anxiousness, I would hide from – a great recipe for increasing my anxiety. Now these areas I see as opportunities to evolve. I’ll bring greater focus to them and be open to learning from.
It’s helped I’ve seen my habit of demanding perfection and not asking for help. Now I can recognise it for what it is – an unnecessary fabrication, me trying to make out life is hard and a struggle to justify me not expressing love. Universal Medicine has been instrumental in supporting me with all these new ways of being.
Beautiful to read how you are with your work now and how this changed, we can support others only when we care for ourselves first.
So many people go to work and as long as they get paid they’re happy. It is awesome that Felicity has made different choices and now enjoys her work showing us another way.
Self-care and self-responsibility make such a difference to how we engage with others and work. It creates a true choice of how we create our day. Thank you Felicity for your great blog.
A beautiful reflection of you Felicity. I feel bringing presence to each moment and connection in the day is so key and something I feel I am still learning to do. When I do my days indeed do flow as I find I feel more joy as I am actually in the moment and really connected to the people I am with. Thanks for sharing your inspiring story.
Reflecting on your words Felicity, I am aware that it doesn’t matter which line of work we are in or whether we work at home or already in retirement, we can be affected by or live by “going through the motions” which is exhausting. The moment I feel into connecting to me first and living self love and self care first I feel lighter. It makes so much sense to live this way first, everyone benefits. The joy you feel in your life now can be clearly felt. Thankyou for sharing.
Felicity, I love the way you write and can so relate to your questioning of the ‘super human practitioners’. I remember during my first sessions being somewhat mystified how the practitioners consistently met me and how they were never in the least bit flustered or stressed when I arrived for a session, there was never a sense of hurrying which as you say is not super human but is a way we all can be if we chose to connect to the stillness within.
Felicity, I love the way you write and can so relate to your questioning of the ‘super human practitioners’. I remember during my first sessions being somewhat mystified how the practitioners consistently met me and how they were never in the least bit flustered or stressed when I arrived for a session, there was never a sense of hurrying which as you say is not super human but is a way we all can be if we chose to connect to the stillness within.
It is a sad omission that University is not training their doctors and nurses to self care. It should be top of the list, but instead it is completely left out. I found your blog very inspiring as I am sure those around you at your work place are also inspired. I can even hear the question ‘how are you doing so well?’. Spread the love Felicity, because it only takes one to inspire another and eventually, self-care in the workplace and for all staff will become something that just cannot be ignored.
True Jo. It is an interesting predicament that we have so much in our education and vocational training about learning facts, learning techniques and learning systems. We are trained for being a nurse, an accountant, a plumber … but there is little training or focus about the quality of life we live. Felicity what you have shared in your article is Gold.
If every University degree course started with a foundation of self care the quality and number of sick days lost in the work place would be staggeringly different. It is no wonder that sick leave is such an issue in over stretched hospitals and businesses.
Living a loving way it wouldn’t matter what we do work, play, study its a joy to be with our self and other people connected in our divine rhythm.
I think it would also be hard for many others to imagine being so content, accepting and loving of themselves – that it is possible. It’s so great that you shared the wonderful turn around you’ve claimed in your life by living some principles you learnt studying with Universal Medicine. I hope many people get to read your words, they are very inspiring Felicity.
This is awesome, how many people live like that? Just getting through the days until retirement and then retirement needs to be the fix it all for what we miss in life. Yet what you describe is what we miss and what makes it hard is that we do not live this loving and caring way with ourselves, therefore many things become a task that needs be gotten out of the way. I used to live this way too and have learned that being with myself and watching the quality in which I work makes all the difference. I don’t think I ever want to retire!
Great point you are making here Felicity, that all we need to do is be present and loving with people and that is enough. How often do we forget this and try to be more? I certainly fall into this trap. I also love how Chris has added the importance of listening into the equation. Truly listening to someone brings a lot of acceptance and understanding, something I appreciate very much, in myself and others.
Thank you for sharing Felicity it is amazing the changes that we can make to ourselves and those around us once we learn to say no to extra demands placed on us and actually start to self care. Self care has to be the best ingredient for any health care worker.
Felicity introduces a very telling point. In our work we are often working with healthcare practitioners talking about the paucity of true listening in the healthcare industry in general, and it is generally acknowledged, and written about, that this is the case, and needs to be addressed. 60% of all complaints in the UK with regard to health care to governing bodies, were about communication and listening. In fact lack of listening is endemic, and a very large factor is due to the perceived pressure of time, for the lack of it. With Universal Medicine practitioners I have never ever experienced anything but total focus and a feeling of being fully listened to. This is indeed integrity in listening of the highest order.
‘I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. Felicity, I work in a caring role with elders and can relate to what you say. Each day I’m shown the value of stepping back and letting interactions unfold instead of stepping in and trying to control. Asking a client if they want my help instead of assuming they do and taking away their independence and right to choose. I feel blessed to be working, love each day and the opportunity I’ve been given to express myself as a carer.
Oh Felicity you are such a dear lady, your open honest and lighthearted expression is so real and relatable, I love it. I so love the turn around you describe with you in work, the difference is tangible and pretty profound and yet not out of reach in the way you present the everyday extraordinaryness of living it all from you first, and introducing self responsibility for quality via self care. Super gorgeous and needed for our nurses, and all of us.
So true Kate. I will never have a baby…but if I were to, I would be seeing Felicity in a heartbeat. That is the level of care and dedication that all of us deserve. And what a joy to be in the beautiful hands of a nurse who is glowing with health.
As you share Felicity every moment at work and everywhere does count. The old work mentality of watching the clock is so real! Wanting time to pass so quickly…to lunch/end of day/week/holidays and retirement. It is a little crazy to think how much physical time we spend in an environment and all the while thinking of the multitude of escapes so we can leave. And humans think they are the intelligent species.
Through what I have learned at Universal Medicine I too absolutely love my work and if you had seen me 13 years ago you would have not believed it was possible.
That is an extraordinary shift Elizabeth, and quite a remarkable statement. It is crazy so many of us have ‘work dread’ when there is another way that supports us to love our time at work.
Work is such a massive part of our lives that it makes sense to put the effort in to make it an enjoyable place to be. I used to run away from jobs once I felt I had gone as far as I could in them, or if they didn’t offer me what I felt I wanted, but now I am able to see that I can change my whole perspective on my work by how I am living and looking after myself. Thanks for sharing your experiences Felicity, great to hear how much you have changed.
This is such a great article. You have shown us that it genuinely is possible to enjoy work, no matter the circumstances, because we always have a choice of how we care for ourselves. Thank you so much for sharing.
How true Shami. A great article on how we can transform our approach to work and life by making more choices to truly take care of ourselves.
‘A great article on how we can transform our approach to work and life’ As I learn to lovingly take more care of myself I find the lines between work (as in paid) and work ( as in life) increasingly blurred and find the joy in both. There are’off’ days, but when I reflect on them I know its because my levels of self care have dropped – more work in progress!
When work and play and life become all one, and we become the same steady person in all of them then that is when true success starts to emerge.
Great comment Dean. The consistent human being…this is a beautiful way to live and so far from boring or any other label that is attached to it. Life becomes steady, rhythmic. People settle around you in trust. They are not braced against mood swings and explosions. That is gold.
That is also my experience Rachel, people respond so very well to consistency and steadiness. It is completely disarming and very supportive to be around someone like that.
Felicity, thanking for your sharing, I can relate to what you have shared, it really is about being present, letting go of judgement, allowing yourself to say no, honouring and respecting others views, there is so much we have learnt from Universal Medicine about ourselves that when we start living that our working place becomes a joy to be at. I truly love my work and as I commit to being present, open and honest the joy is felt amongst my work. Just the other day one of our staff said you make such a difference, your energy, your presence changes the energy around us, there is a feeling of joy and it just brightens up our day. For me this was a great confirmation, that energy is felt by all, and our livingness impacts all.
‘I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be.’ Your patients will feel nurtured and truly cared for Felicity, thank you for being such a joyful inspiration.
Alleluia, that is the truth… not having ‘to have all the answers to be of use’. Just being ourselves and allowing all that love we are inside to just be there with another person. That is the best feeling in the world.
This is something that can’t be overlooked and yes to more Nurses and people in the work force like you Felicity. If we look at the bigger picture and do a study on how people associated with Universal Medicine are at work and not even go into their output but just study their mood and attitude that already would be significantly different to what is considered ‘normal’. As Felicity and other described most of us consider work to be just a part of living, not a chore but really enjoyable. So much so you can hardly call it work because to many it is just part of life. I don’t say with resignation but more accepting the wonderful part of my life that is work and how enjoyable it is. It wasn’t always like this though, enter Universal Medicine.
Ray, you are spot on, there is a university doctoral study here that could save the world millions in lost productivity, sick leave and the rest. Regardless of the profession /vocation the transformation I see in people (including me) is amazing.
Spot on Ray and Joel. The title “from Misery to Fun at Work” itself says it all. There is Gold ready to be tapped into.
We do not take full account of the problem of the employee who is present in body, but they are a million miles away in their mind. They have given it the catchy title “presentiee-ism” i.e.: at work, but not really at work. The economic cost might be being factored….but what about the human cost of being absent from your own life for 8-9 hours per day? No economist can measure that. Boredom, disinterest, not caring, the “whatever” attitude…and Monday with Friday on the mind (love it Felicity) erode the human being until, you have to ask, who is left at the point of retirement?
Big questions and a big PhD in the making. Universal Medicine needs to set up a business institute in the the meantime.
It is a game changer.
It is a game changer Rachel and I agree with all of these comments. My whole attitude to work has shifted completely since coming across Universal Medicine and the drudgery that I used to get through my day with has lifted and I come with such a strong sense of who I am and a strong commitment to my colleagues and to the people I meet in my work day. And I know thousands of students are doing the same in their own workplaces. And gosh the workplace needs this – so many people are just ‘getting through the day, counting down the hours’….and whilst people may giggle and have a laugh about it, it is actually a devastating way to live. And I know that because I used to do it and on some days still slip into it and it feels horrible.
I so agree with all these comments about the employee who is present in person but away in their mind and how this affects us all. Growing up I never wanted to be living for the weekend and so rather than deal with how to be at work/ live in life I opted for shift work and working irregular patterns!!! Hilarious because I also couldn’t wait till it was the end of my shift.
Now I really look forward to work and seeing everyone I work with. And if I don’t, I know there’s something I’m not looking at. I know it’s not work that is the issue. Whatever work is presenting is an opportunity to grow. In the past I just blamed work for my troubles rather than, for me , face my insecurities about being in the world.
Absolutely Rachel. Entire lives are lost in this game of ‘presentee-ism’… A cost too great to ever be calculated.
We are also creating vacant ‘positions’ in life because we are not fulfilling our only duty – to be ourselves (a role that only we can play)… And so the whole world is at a loss when we aren’t present. How do we measure the cost of this to our wellbeing as a whole?
Yes Ray, you nailed it with your comment! Growing up I could never imagine myself in an office doing “9-5” but now, in my 30s, I find myself doing exactly that (as well as running my own business on the side) and absolutely love it! It is not about the work, but how I am with myself, and with everyone around me that has changed.
It is true Raymond, now enjoying work more then ever before I can say that it was not always like this….. Universal Medicine was key to making this change and to continue to make changes. “Work is Medicine” is one of Serge Benhayon’s quote, and what a true quote this is.
How many people can truly say, “It truly is a joy to go to work now” as clearly and without hindrance as you have Felicity.
A giant ‘hear, hear’ as to how Universal Medicine has, and continues to, inspire the way I work also, and the realisations that our day is about everything that we ‘do’, and how we are with it. THIS is the education our societies are screaming for – what is needed to effect real changes in regards to absenteeism, presenteeism (working with little productivity), and our whole approach to life…
What a joy it must be to be your colleague or a patient Felicity, an absolute joy… 🙂
What a top blog Felicity and I love your style of writing.
I too hated work and like you say “hoped the years until retirement would pass quickly and I could get into a laid back lifestyle that would suit me better.”
Now thanks to the work of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine I absolutely Love everything about my work and my life. I plan to work until my last breath and I cannot see any point of retirement when I know how valuable I am to others who would benefit if I carried on working and not lounging around or bopping around the world on some cruise for the elderly.
It brings me great joy and deep contentment to commit and dedicate my life to firstly taking great care of me and my body and then doing what I do best – helping others to not give up.
Beautiful Bina, very inspiring comment, can really feel the joy you have from your commitment to love, for you and others.
And, awesome sharing Felicity on the all too common phenomenon of not claiming our responsibility to ‘work’, brings much to ponder on, thank you.
Who would not want to employ someone like you Felicity? What a gift for any workplace where their employees have such integrity and responsibility that goes beyond the level of the job at hand. This is almost unheard of in any workplace where the general rule is to be at work, but as you said Felicity, to be distracted and clock watching. You are a real asset for the healthcare profession.
Awesome funny article Felicity, and so amazing how life can turn around with some gradual simple shifts in ourselves. At a time when there is more burnout, exhaustion and stress in the nursing and medical profession than ever, what you have learned through the UM presentations could not be more valuable or needed. Through applying the simple principles you have outlined, I have seen burnt out doctors, dentists and nurses come alive, regain their health and re-enter the workforce with renewed enthusiasm. And the flow-on effects and support to patients and work colleagues is amazing and truly supportive of everyone.
Love it Felicity. It sounds like you have only just begun your working life, and are enjoying every moment of it. Imagine how much fun the patients and your colleagues get to enjoy when they are around you… you take health care to a whole new level.
This article really shows that it depends on how we are, our quality that we bring to the workplace that makes a difference….but first it starts with our relationships with ourselves….if you can be you in nursing, a very stressful and pressured job at times, it can be lived in any workplace.
Great blog Felicity
I feel self love should be not only taught in every profession but also play a big part in what our kids learn at school and that everything we do has an impact.
I agree Kevin, including self love on the school curriculum would certainly have a hugely supportive affect on how we go in to adulthood and our working lives.
Gosh how many people must feel this way about their working life which you described when you said you “hoped the years until retirement would pass quickly and I could get into a laid back lifestyle”. But you clearly also shared your shift in this attitude by building a loving way in your day with yourself – enough so you could actually bring it with you to work…why would you not want to work when you can enjoy yourself in this way!
Living true responsibility – what does this mean? I have been exploring this since I started studying with Universal Medicine and it is something Serge Benhayon presents on often. I have made many changes in my life and have slowly taken more responsibility for myself and in turn my health and wellbeing has greatly improved, but recently I have been feeling there is a much deeper level of responsibility I can be living – the feeling to bring a deeper quality into my day by first allowing this quality to be in my body. For me this is the key, what is in my body I am responsible for because it is my body and no one else’s. This is what I then bring to all those around me and this is what I have come to know true responsibility to be – the quality of my being.
I find it interesting to reflect on how my day went at work, and if it wasn’t so good, to take my attention back earlier in the day to see what happened; to even sometimes, the day before, to see how it was set up. This isn’t to beat myself up, but to see exactly what has happened. It’s supportive to myself for how tomorrow will be.
Wow Felicity how inspiring to read here of your turn around at work from misery to joy. I regularly hear people grumbling about their jobs but what if they were to make it not about the job but how they were being in it, could this turn around then be possible for anyone? Imagine what our world be like if people actually enjoyed their work. For a start people on the buses, tubes, walking to work might be smiling! I can feel the pure joy and love you bring to your work in what you write here. What a blessing for all the patients you come in contact with and an amazing reflection for all your co-workers. I love that you point out that self-care in medical training is lacking and starting a much-needed conversation on the subject.
Beautiful that you asked the question Felicity of how the practitioners at Universal Medicine could be that way and then to find that way yourself and feel the difference in your own life is amazing. I have noticed that people in the workforce are so stressed and there is very little awareness of self-care out there. Since attending presentations by Serge Benhayon I have changed from not working for years due to exhaustion to now working in aged care and feeling that joy of connection with others. Love of humanity follows when we make self-loving choices first.
I love this line Felicity…”No-one to blame, just more choices to consider.” Wow! So when we have an off day, we simply look back and see where we made choices for it to begin to go off. Nail that and go ‘oops’ and make difference choices. Hmmm, so simple.
It sounds like true care Felicity. Imagine if every nurse, doctor – any health professional had this level of awareness. If what you have come to know through Universal Medicine and now take with you into nursing was a part of medical training. That would be revolutionary.
Having the belief that you have to have all the answers caused me a lot of anxiety at work. You nail it Felicity when you say simply being present and loving and to let people be is enough, thank you.
‘HI-5!” to you Felicity, Such a beautiful blog to read, sharing the way you work so you are not burdened by the ‘system’ or issues going on around within a workplace. Like yourself, I too have found a way of bringing self care into the way I work as a nurse. It is very possible to still feel your sparkle and not be exhausted at the end of a shift. Thanks to Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine presenting the concept of self care. Self care IS true medicine to all ailments and a way of living.
Totally agree with you, that “It’s a sad omission from the university-based training and could probably explain the ongoing loss of the nursing workforce”.
Introducing Self Care during any health science training (nursing, physio, medical, dental, psychology etc) is a very much needed topic, as it has the potential to revolutionize not just the way health care is delivered, but raise the quality of every healthcare institution. Imagine the level of healing possible if we all worked with this level of care and responsibility.
Thanks Felicity for your post and bringing humour and lightness to the topic, I am sure many can relate to feeling their work is making them miserable. There is much to draw on from reading this, I especially like the simplicity you found in being present and loving with others and letting them be, not feeling pressured to have all the answers and still feeling enough. Through your responsibility for your choices the whole way you work has changed –inspiring and true magic.
Lovely to read, expressing so clearly the importance of self-care and how it is so healing for others. “If I have a day at work that doesn’t feel so good, I trace it back to how MY day started…..and it usually makes perfect sense. No-one to blame, just more choices to consider” is great point you make here – that is up to us as to how we experience the world and our life.
As you state so clearly Felicity, our educational systems set us up to being perfect in everything that we will do in our profession, and it comes with the arrogance that through the education, we will have access to all the answers we will encounter in our lives.
But what is society showing us, is this working and do we have all the answers? As you say, Felicity “I was just as burned out by the ‘system’ as those that perpetuated it” confirms that this is not the case.
So thank you for showing me your experiences with Universal Medicine and how you have changed your life in general and your being at work by slowly implementing the way of living presented in the Universal Medicine courses, presentations and workshops.
This confirms to me that there is another way, the way that is already known by all of us, waiting to be rediscovered and lived.
This is a great story to read Felicity, and I think how amazing it will be when people learning the caring professions are taught in University to care for themselves first.
I know for myself the difference it makes when someone is really present with you and themselves without judgement. It certainly is a healing quality. All the practical skills and knowledge are still very much needed but alongside this greater understanding of energy rather than in isolation.
That’s awesome you love your work now Felicity. When someone truly loves working and loves their job it really shines through… You could only imagine what day-to-day life would be like if everyone made the effort to enjoy themselves at work… wow, that would be a different world, something so simple would make a huge difference.
Hello Felicity and this simple sharing is very powerful. How you can go from not really even liking work to now loving it and feeling it’s “fun”, truly amazing. The quality of how you are and not what you do is important. If the dedication is to ‘your’ quality then anything you do will carry that same quality, seems simple enough for me and makes perfect sense. I am glad there are nurses like you Felicity, thank you.
“Hmmm…those UM practitioners are not superhuman or fakes, I have learned they are people just like me”… Love this line, it captures the truth of it perfectly.
I really enjoyed reading your story Felicity, how much more we have to give when we take the pressure off ourselves and don’t expect we should have all the answers. Your approach must be worth considering, as most people want to retire sooner rather than later, and this seems like quite a transformation for you!
Love your blog Felicity, Sometimes I forget that most of humanity do not live like us…loving what we do, sometimes working up to fifteen-seventeen hours a day loving every moment of it, waking up looking forward to the workday ahead….they need to read your blog so as to know it is possible.
“I learned that I had to do everything right and have all the answers as often as possible, placing me under enormous pressure to be perfect. There was no discussion ever about the way in which I worked or the quality I offered to people when I walked through the door.” Since discovering Universal Medicine I have been learning that the quality in which we do things is as important as what we do. This has been life-changing for me. A great sharing, thankyou Felicity.
A great sharing Felicity. ” I notice how letting go of judgement of others frees them and reduces the tension between people.” This is a huge one and as you say, so freeing for us to be this way. Having an acceptance of others and being present with them is a great quality to develop, super supportive for them and us too.
A must read for people in nursing, a profession that is so sacred at its core but sullied by our lack of self-responsibility and lack of self-care. Thank you Felicity.
What awesome discoveries you have found. Maybe YOU can take what you have learnt to the nursing students as I am sure it would help support them. What I realised reading your article is that I used to dread work, it was a definitely this is just what I have to do feeling. Through Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine I learnt about committment to life and actually how great and empowering it was (I spent my whole life running away from committment thinking that if I committed to something I would ‘lose’ me. It is in fact the complete opposite, when you commit to life you actually start to build a deeper, stronger and more loving relationship with yourself.
I love your line, ‘I learned to enjoy building the love in me enough.’ This is amazing – it means that building love in my body doesn’t have to be a chore but can be something inspiring and wonderful. Thank you Felicity.
This is lovely Felicity, I was casually reading, until this line got me… “I learned to enjoy building the love in me enough so I can actually bring it with me to work and my family”
This is so true, such a powerful thing to learn…thank you for reconnecting me to this gift I have given myself.
This is a great read Felicity thank you. As I work on being present I am much more aware of when the brain chatter and distractions are and how I go into reaction, which takes me away from my presence. With presence I have much more clarity and efficiency in what I’m doing and greater awareness of others.
Top blog Felicity, thank you. This line sums it all up for me, ” No-one to blame, just more choices to consider”. With this thinking, there is no issue we can’t solve. Simply because we created the issue in the first place. It’s great to know you are now having fun when you go to work and that retiring is not the focus.
I can really feel Felicity how you have developed in your relationship with work in this article and when things go wrong you look back at the day and understand where you were present and not present and make different choices. Inspirational!
Wow I love reading this blog and all of the comments. I can certainly feel a pull to be perfect at work – it’s how I thought I survived in the world. But actually it’s so exhausting I know it’s untenable: the quality I spend with the people I meet harms rather than supports them and for me personally so much time is wasted on anxiousness and faffing I can see that I won’t get what is needed done, and I will become ill.
I shall keep coming back here for inspiration!
I agree that there is enormous pressure applied at work sometimes on ourselves to get things right, to strive to be more, or to fulfil others needs and demands. I used to work like this and I know that this creates a lot of tension and exhaustion in the body. These days I am learning that all I have to do is just be me at work, nothing more, nothing less, which involves as you say Felicity, simply being present and really meeting people without judgement. And knowing that all of this will not be perfect. I agree that it should be taught on day one of any college course of job orientation!
Learning to say no was a bit of a challenge for me too. Something I was able to develop more though by attending Universal Medicine events. It was a great point you made about how you are when you walk into the rooms affects the vulnerable person in there. When we are working with people we do have to be responsible for how we are with ourselves. I notice when I am not myself, it affects how I interact with the customers I have at work.
Great sharing Felicity, there is so much more we can offer when we are connected and present with the moment. I’ve had similar beliefs about work. I now enjoy going to work and find its a great time for me to practice being present and with myself. I can feel what a difference this has made on what I bring to my work, and the positive effects on the people around me.
Hi Felicity, what a beautiful turn around in how you approach work. And what a gift you now are to all the people in your workplace, staff and patients. I once used to live for the weekends but I realise how being present at work is so much more enjoyable in many ways. There is much more of me and my love on offer and so much more to experience when connecting with people. And in my experience l have also found (and I am sure we have all felt this to be true) that people can feel and enjoy when you are present with them. Thank you for sharing your new found fun in working and highlighting the responsibility we all have when we work with people, with each other.
Thank you Felicity for a very beautiful sharing. I can feel the love and care you bring to your self and those you care for, so much of this is missing in the medical professions.
I remember when I first started to say ‘no’, it was so uncomfortable at first, so many ideals and beliefs came around being a ‘yes’ person. I found when I became more honest and true to myself what a relief I felt, to just be me, to be honest and true to myself and others.
“Every day gives me an opportunity to bring more presence and connection to the people I care for and work with”. Felicity I have always had great admiration of nursing staff for the difficult work they do, but more importantly for the care that I have mostly experienced. A gentle voice, a light touch can heal us far more at times than procedures or medicines. Thank for being fully you, in your presence with the patients you encounter.
This line really speaks to me – “I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough.” Accepting ourselves as enough is a gateway to fuller expression and truer relationships. It feels wonderful to be open and real with others without the usual hangups.
Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about work – as I don’t have a permanent one – what is work for me? How is it possible not to think about retirement? How can some people work 10-12 hours a day without feeling tired?
I’ve been watching people in the esoteric community, how joy-full they are and how much they can fit in the same 24 hours. What’s their secret?
What I came to realize is everything is coming back to me – my relationship with myself, my commitment and mostly my own rhythm. When it is sorted there is no problem of working seven days a week, meeting people, doing what needs to be done.
There is still some resistance toward having a full time job but I am working at it.
Thank you, Felicity, for your encouraging and moving blog, confirming and loving.
I experience so much more joy these days when I do my work as a nurse in the community. Every day, no every moment, I can make the choice to take care of myself, my thoughts, the way I drive my car from one client to the other, the way I walk and how I am with clients and their family. This is a forever deepening process of love, love for myself and everybody equally.
Wow amazing change Felicity. So awesome to read, Thank you. It is the most wonderful feeling to want to be at work and bringing your love with it. I have found that when I work with resentment or frustration there is no joy in it. When I hold tension in my body I don’t perform well at work or at home. When I stay present and focused and not let distractions or negative thoughts take over I feel at ease and more joy in what I do. I can feel it in my body when I am fully focused giving my 100% or when I am not. By becoming more aware of my choices and my body I can learn to make more loving choices.
That is so true Chanly, when I have let myself go or been in a reaction to something work related, the joy leaves my body and work becomes a burden. When I let go and remember how precious every interaction is with others, especially in health care when they feel vulnerable, I bring all of my warmth, love and joy to my work, and work is a pleasure when I feel like that.
Thank you Felicity, you have raised a great point for me to reflect upon ‘reaction’. I have been caring for my elderly in-law for the past 2 weeks who just came out of hospital from a major surgery. It has been an amazing time for me to care for him and assist without imposing. I described it as ‘I was on holiday’ while I was staying with him. He was an easy patient because he wasn’t demanding or grumpy. We have an awesome connection.
But just a few days ago something changed, I went into reaction towards him internally. I began to distance myself from him and felt I needed to take a walk and feel why I was feeling hurt. I realised what was happening was I was in fact attached to wanting him to make more loving choices and I didn’t voice how I felt when he had reacted to what I had lovingly prepared for him. I realised that my reaction was from feeling attached to what I thought was good for his health.
When I let go of that I was able to reconnect with him again and stay open to supporting him with more awareness, to not impose or go into reaction.
Re-reading this blog really lets me feel the joy of responsibility, in taking care of how we are, how we move and speak etc. This is a beautiful rhythm to develop and live by.
I agree Janet and with that comes a deep appreciation that what I bring each day is felt and welcomed so lovingly with all the people that I work with.
There is such a treasure in what you write Felicity, and that it’s not about trying but just about being with others and letting them be, and allowing our interactions to unfold without any expectations and suddenly everyone is freed up, and there’s a space for something different, the joy of being ourselves with another.
Beautiful Monica – this is a treasure, I had such a surge of joy reading this – thank you Felicity. I have been working with people in health too, in physiotherapy – for the first 15 years it was pressure and trying and achieving. Over the last 15 years this has slowly changed, as it did for Felicity, as I stopped trying and let myself just be me with others and enjoyed the connection without any expectation on me or them. I was able to be more myself as I started to truly care for myself and appreciate myself, then I was able to appreciate others too. Work became a time for more connection, not a time to fix someone who had problems. I miss not being at work now when I have days off, and I love everything about my work and the people I meet every day.
Kate, this is so lovely to feel how we are all connected at work and outside and how when we connect to that purpose it becomes about that connection first and foremost and everything else falls along behind that with no trying.
Indeed Monica, it feels so absurd that we always calibrate and think about what to do or say or the reactions this might cause. When truly opening up and meeting others without expectations or judgement, but just as equals, suddenly an openness and freedom finds room that is just amazingly beautiful and brings such simplicity to everything.
What you say Monica, blurs the lines between ‘work’ time, and ‘down’ time., and helps me to see life as ‘opportunity’ time. No expectations, but a constant opportunity for connection and joy.
Lovely to read, how your connection to your self changed the way you are with your work. And how you actually only then can truly care for your patients.
Benkt great point I know I would also “do, do, do, do, do, do…” and then consider taking care of myself. In my own way it shows just how back to front we have things. By putting ourselves first we will naturally be putting everyone else equally with us. Therefore the more we care and build a love of ourself the more we can actually care and love another – be it in a medical situation or at the supermarket checkout.
Felicity I just wanted to say I really enjoyed reading your article again – there is much in there to ponder on – thank you.
Felicity I like the image of you entering a patient’s room with integrity and care. When we are tuned in to our inner heart there is so much we can offer patients, colleagues, students and ourselves. Thank you for your blog.
“To this day, nursing students are not taught to care for themselves first and foremost before equally caring for others”. – So very true and this can be said about all forms of training institutions. Imagine how the world would be if we started to train students to first and foremost lovingly care for themselves, to fill themselves up from the inside so that they are not drained by their day and therefore have a quality of true substance to impart as they go about their day.
Such an inspiring blog, Felicity. Self-care, responsibility and integrity should be the most important subject or lesson taught to all health care professionals. Caring and supporting themselves first, translates to better care for their patients, as you so beautifully share.
It’s great to read about a practising nurse writing about self-care. From the awakening process of realising how little true self-care was there, to the building of the connection with oneself that makes it possible. The 2013 White Paper from the Australian Medical Association made it very clear that this is now a priority with doctors, and it is equally as important for nurses. What Universal Medicine offers on a very practical and ongoing basis needs to be embraced and utilised in supporting all healthcare practitioners.
Felicity it is so true what you say that it is not taught in university that how we are when we walk through the door actually affects all the people that we see. People working in the health care industry (and most industries really) are there because they want to help people in some way. Knowing we can help or not hinder in any additional way, just by being who we are is powerful. It can bring up a lot too, as it makes us look at our true responsibility to be ultra self loving and caring in all that we do, so how we are at work is no less.
Congratulations, Felicity, a wonderful example of how you changed your perception of your work from it’s being a drudgery to a joy. Isn’t it great how we can alter the way in which we are living and working – slowly and lovingly!. Isn’t it a shame that we do not learn about this way at school and at university. What a great thing it would be for everyone if we did.
This is wonderfully poignant Felicity and for ALL professions and also life itself – “nursing students are not taught to care for themselves first and foremost before equally caring for others”. Self first before we then ‘do’ another, be that care, love, appreciate, celebrate, value.. the list is endless, allows the vitality for it to be there in great and full supply for everyone else. The other way round leaves us exhausted and as you say, always trying from such a diminished state, always then in pursuit of perfection.
It is common place to put the blame on the job and the job alone, we do not often stop to look at ourselves and how we are contributing to our own discontentment. Felicity your story of how we can enjoy our place of work and connect with those in it was very refreshing to read.
“I learned to enjoy building the love in me enough so I can actually bring it with me to work and my family.” Felicity reading your blog early in the morning before work shows me I have a choice to build love all day long and share it with all who cross my path.
Self-care should be in the curriculum of all nurses, doctors, teachers and all people who are working with people. You can not take care of another, if you don’t take care of yourself.
So true Mariette, this is something I am learning, the more I care for myself and am present with myself the more I am able to care for others.
I absolutely agree with you, Mariette: you have nothing to offer and therefore you cannot take care of another without taking care of yourself first. This should be part of everybody’s training, doesn’t matter which profession you have. The working gets more easy, more fun, more connected to one another, so everybody gains. I learned so much being a coach, on the importance of taking care of myself first and the topic comes up a lot in my coaching for the clients as well. We all benefit from taking care of ourselves.
Wow Felicity, what I hear you say is that our true job is to be aware of energy, then our work becomes simpler and much more fun.
Joseph you have summed it all up so well!
Thanks so much , that’s exactly the shift I have made as well as many others.
Joseph, Felicity, what a great way to approach things. I’ve found the same in that the more I allow myself to see that everything is energy then the less overwhelming work becomes and the greater understanding I have about everything that goes on. Naturally and without directly trying, it then becomes simpler and I really enjoy it.
How many literally can’t wait to retire and go to work with the attitude ‘I just want to get paid’? The connecting to and caring for others is not part of the equation. Thank you for sharing Felicity on how we can enjoy work and connect and care for others in the process, and actually enjoy our life rather than wait till we get near the end of it to enjoy it.
Imagine how different the world would be if not only nurses but everyone whether at work in any whatever capacity or at home, had the awareness that who they are when they meet any other, actually affects the other person. If humanity understood this level of responsibility, wars, conflict and the much illness and disease would be almost non-existent. Thank you for showing the way Felicity.
Beautifully written Felicity. I have also been inspired by the deep care and attention that I am always met with when I go for complementary healing sessions at Universal Medicine. It is a beautiful feeling that I absolutely treasure as the support of these sessions in my life has been monumental. It inspires me to bring a dedication and level of care to my life so that I can be in that presence and quality with others also.
Great blog Felicity, work is definitely more fun when we are feeling good! It’s a shame that it’s not taught in EVERY workplace that looking after ourselves is so important – not only for ourselves but for everyone we come across during our day.
You are AWESOME Felicity! Just had to say that. I can really relate to what you are saying and felt the same when I was an acupuncturist. Wanting to retire early even though I liked people and the people contact of the profession – I too was burnt out like the rest of them. Through the Universal Medicine courses and the Universal Medicine Modalities (which I now practise) working as a practitioner is NOT a drain and working all day every day with people is as enjoyable as ever . . The best actually.
I deeply love how simple you have presented responsibility to be. First with yourself and then with others. And so it turns out, living as a ‘super-human’ is not so ‘super-human’ but just a normal human living a very dedicated, responsible and committed life.
Felicity, you wrote “I discovered that who I am when I walk through a door into a patient’s room actually affects the vulnerable person in there.” This is an amazing revelation not to be overlooked by any means. To realise that you have the power to heal or harm is a beautiful gift for yourself and for others. Your blog is a great reminder of the responsibility that each of us holds.
Such a turnaround Felicity from having one eye on retirement to now loving being at work. That in itself is huge and is worth celebrating and appreciating.
It goes against everything I’ve heard in regards to nursing. Normally nurses can’t wait to retire – not from the people but from the systems. It’s great to see there is a way to be in nursing that is truly enjoyable.
I agree Sandra. An early retirement stops so many people from witnessing the joy we can all bring to our work place when we start to appreciate ourselves and all that we bring.
We spend so much time at work we may as well enjoy it ( and ourselves) while we are there. Caring for ourselves as we work is such a great way to be. You still get everything done but without all the stress and tension.
“No-one to blame, just more choices to consider” – I find this to be a very powerful statement. I too once wished for the ultimate skip-out, to just be independent from work or freed from any responsibility; now, I enjoy the prospect of never ending yoga in work.
Thank you Felicity, it is amazing to feel the significant shifts you have made with yourself and the affects that can be felt not only by you but by all those around you.
Felicity congratulations on the changes that you have made in your life after connecting to Universal Medicine Practitioners and Serge Benhayon’s workshops, courses and retreats. To know you can make a difference in the way you are energetically each day, must be amazing. The truth is that in any profession or in our lives generally, we are responsible for how we affect those around us as much as ourselves. So it seems that there is no other to blame if I don’t like what I am doing or how I feel and what effect I have on others – it is the energy I choose to be in on that day.
Felicity I am beginning to feel more and more how we are all constantly co-creating. As we each re-learn that this is what we are doing, we will take more responsibility until such time that we are all consciously and collectively continually raising the whole.
What a great reflection your choices will be for colleagues and patients.
Felicity what you share is so important … I love your palpable joy and in particular your sentence ‘If I have a day at work that doesn’t feel so good, I trace it back to how MY day started…..and it usually makes perfect sense. No-one to blame, just more choices to consider.’ This level of responsibility is definitely a life-changer.
How lovely it would like to be receive medical treatment from a nurse like you…to feel so relaxed and reassured without you having to voice this. Let’s have many more.
Choosing responsibility for how we are in our lives includes the willingness to look at how we are living that life, and not place blame on people or situations outside of ourselves. I have lived life in the past, waiting for my ‘real’ life to begin, when I can do what I want when I want – opportunities wasted. I now realise that I am the one missing out and just as you have articulated so beautifully there is another way and in any moment that way can be chosen…….Thanks Felicity for your reminder.
I love your sharing Felicity. Your work day, your work and relationships created all now feel very purposeful. It is lovely to read about your commitment to people and life.
That’s really inspiring! I have been out of steady work for a about a year now and whilst it has definitely gotten me down and also left me often feeling like I’m lacking purpose….It hasn’t felt too dissimilar to when I was working.
Over the last few months however, I’ve noticed a shift in me whereby I’m looking forward to working again. I feel like I actually do have something to offer and that working has so much to offer me in return. I also feel far less attached to the industry I’m working in and also what my job description might be. Being free of some the restrictions I have cemented firmly in place in the past is really opening me up to opportunity which I never expected. This approach I’ve been embodying has most definitely been inspired by the several Universal Medicine practitioners I have witnessed do the same.
What a great turnaround Felicity for you and your patients, all because you have learnt to self care and make more loving choices, so simple. Thank you.
Saying no to what doesn’t feel right is a very empowering choice to make and it stops resentment in its tracks because there is nobody to blame for what we have chosen..
Thanks Felicity. Loved reading about your amazing ‘turn around’ towards your work, now your patients are getting so much more of gorgeous YOU.
Thanks for a truly inspiring article Felicity. I can see where I still try to be perfect and get it right and fix at work.
That’s awesome Felicity. I too have experienced that as I have worked on my own self-love that how I feel about my work has completely changed. So often we can think that if we change what we do, that life will be better. What I too have learnt and experienced is that when I change how I am by building my self-love, there is no need to change what I do, because there is now ‘me’ in what I am doing and it becomes a whole different experience.
Beautiful Felicity, and something so many can relate to. I also see many people in the workplace who don’t enjoy their jobs and are exhausted, but just hanging out so they have enough money to retire. This is such a sad way of looking at work especially when we are often at work more than anywhere else… and the people we work with see us more than our family and friends. Thank you for sharing another more joyful way of working and truly supporting yourself and others.
“I learned to enjoy building the love in me enough so I can actually bring it with me to work and my family”. Very inspiring Felicity thank you!
It is lovely to have the knowingness that the more love and care we have for others, the more of this we can take to our workplaces where others can be inspired to do the same.
So true Francisco. And to add to that we then, just as Felicity now is – a solid and joyful reflection for others. As many have been inspired by the quality of the practitioners of Universal Medicine, so too are those who choose to take self responsibility and care to their work and daily life activities.
I can feel Felicity how much more open and less protected you are in your work now, having dropped the resistance to being there. Your patients and colleagues are indeed blessed to be able to receive all you have to offer, all of you…
It’s amazing how you have transformed the way you are by just being who you are….that in any given moment, by simply allowing others to be who they are, you present another way to live life. It’s also incredible that there is no credence given to the role of self-care in nursing. It is a “sad omission” and one you are, no doubt, transforming just by being you. Thanks, Felicity.
Felicity, I too remember that first time I was able to be courageous enough to say ‘No’ to someone, it is such a huge thing when your momentum has always been to say ‘Yes’. Thank you for this inspiring blog.
Very refreshing Felicity, and a great reminder that the way we start our day is what we are setting ourselves up with for the rest of the day.
Just love your transition from misery to fun at work, Felicity. What a huge difference the realisation: “I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be”, makes to the way we work and live. And like you, retirement is definitely not on my agenda.
An insightful and inspiring read Felicity. Thank you.
Your opening paragraph: “I was never all that keen on work. For many years I saw it as a necessary evil and hoped the years until retirement would pass quickly and I could get into a laid back lifestyle that would suit me better.” and your last paragraph: “I no longer want to think about retiring when going to work has become such fun!” alone shows how worthwhile it would be to learn from and adopt Universal Medicine’s teachings when training nurses – in fact this would be true in all industries.
Felicity, awesome changes you have made in your life – I am pleased you are not considering retirement in the near future. You have much to offer your colleagues and patients with the positive changes you have made and the joy in which you live your life.
So inspiring and wonderful turnaround Felicity!
I can so relate to how you have felt in nursing.
Lots of powerful gems to ponder upon such as- “I learned I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough”
Unfortunately workplaces filled with people waiting for retirement is becoming increasing more common. The given up mentality is well and thriving both for workers and customers/clients. What I have learnt is to also not judge these people for the choices they are making and find a way to come to work and live the joy naturally in my heart with every interaction and not hold back all that I am. I love working, always have and can’t even imagine retiring from giving all of me right up to my last breath. Thanks to Universal Medicine Therapies, presentations and workshops I have felt confirmed in the love I have for humanity and am learning how to walk into any environment, not holding back. This is truly an inspirational way to live and I am enjoying deepening my commitment to the truths I hold in my inner heart.
To those waiting for retirement I say: Don’t spend the next however many years waiting to have love and joy in your lives, do it now. It’s there just waiting for you to feel it.
I was just reflecting on your comment and words of wisdom Catherine about ‘waiting for retirement’ and it takes me back 40 or so years when a main focus that was put to us in the workforce was not necessarily be love and live in a loving way, but to ‘prepare for retirement’. It never felt right, and always felt to me a bit like “just you wait until your father gets home – then you’ll know what it’s all about” – like a cloud hanging over waiting to drop whatever on your precious self, and to this end when occupation in the office workforce was complete I could never write “retired” in the ‘occupation’ box that is always there to fill in on the endless forms presented here and there in life – being ‘retired’ from life didn’t seem to be quite right – so I always wrote something else like ‘student of life’. I have found there is so much joy in life if we but choose to connect to our inner heart.
I love working too but for me this has only come about as I have chosen to love me more, self care and nurture and connect with others presently so.
Johanna such a key point in all of this, I too am learning the importance of the love that I hold and develop for myself first will then help develop and expand the fun, love and enjoyment at work.
Thank you Felicity, very inspiring.
Felicity this is a great turn around. We so often here the words “One power ball and I’m out of here”. It is wonderful to hear someone choosing not to play the lotto game!
Felicity what a glorious turn around from thinking about retirement to truly loving your working life. If we all choose to be with ourselves and enjoy every moment of our lives could you imagine the healing?
I agree Kelly. It is a glorious turn around and a blessing for humanity that felicity now loves her work and may remain in it in her caring way longer.
That’s awesome Felicity how you are no longer burnt out and can now bring inspiration to your workplace, in every interaction and everything you do.
” I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough. I have also noticed that I seem to be able to do my job more efficiently, effectively and safely when I am not wasting energy on trying all the time.”
Having been such a ‘trier’ all my life, I am still tackling this one, but know that when I am present and connected with myself, life flows. There is then enough time and I can let go of outcomes. A great post Felicity.
Great to read this again today Felicity just before going off to my nursing day. It is so real and uplifting and joyful to read of your turn around. It also feels like I am reading my own autobiography! Like you I have come 360 degrees back to loving nursing again. Thanks to Universal Medicine and all the wonderful nurses, doctors, physios and allied health care workers I have met and been inspired by at the Universal Medicine courses.
Awesome blog Felicity, what a turn around. Most amazing, but not, just a beautiful natural state of being every person can choose just by being themselves in the livingness they are.
Felicity your insights and joy that I can feel in words/post take ‘responsibility at work’ to a whole new level. That we are responsible for our own enjoyment at work, and not anything else like the company itself, the profession we’re in, our boss or colleague providing it for us. Our enjoyment is down to us; it is something felt within us and what we bring to the job, not the other way round. Wonderful!
Your understanding of how letting go of ‘trying’ really frees you up to be there more in a caring and present way for your clients is so liberating Felicity! I can really relate to how all that trying to achieve outcomes is just a drain of energy or trying to control what colleagues do is such a waste of time and source of frustration. Thank you indeed Felicity.
I so love in your blog where you say that your mind space is much clearer, because you are not trying all of the time. I can so relate to this. I too can feel that my mind space is much more open and free. Free to spend its time with my body. This is really beautiful and allows me to be much more present with people when I am with them, because I am with me.
Your great blog demonstrates beautifully how self care and honest self observation, without self recrimination, can completely turn ones life around. Life then becomes a joy and that joy then becomes a part of everything we do. Thank you Felicity.
That’s a huge turn around Felicity, it must be a very nurturing experience for your patients to have you caring for them.
“If I have a day at work that doesn’t feel so good, I trace it back to how MY day started…..and it usually makes perfect sense. No-one to blame, just more choices to consider.” How empowering to consider how our own choices can impact on our day and of course that these choice run through our everyday life and into our life at work. A nurse and midwife working from a foundation of self care and love, an inspiration concerning true health and well being.
You raise a very important topic here Felicity, by mentioning that the way we live translates to the way that we are with our work.
This is a great account Felicity, of how you have applied self care to your life and how everything has turned completely around as a consequence. Bringing self care into nursing… into hospitals, now there’s true medicine!
Hear hear! I love this “Bringing self care into nursing… into hospitals, now there’s true medicine!” In fact, bringing self care into ‘any’ profession and to ‘every’ individual – now there’s truly true medicine!
Enjoying work is an essential.
I too understand the education of nursing to constantly performing miracles as demi gods. Very little is taught about self care at uni (as I’m a studying registered nurse at uni). There are glimpses of promoting self care, however it’s trumped by the fact that they want you to be functional and not because there is a natural call for it in the nursing profession.
And everyone who gets to experience your amazing work feels this (I say again) amazing integrity towards your work Tony.
Felicity your question “Were they superhuman or very good fakes?” and the fact that you responded by finding out for yourself, exposes those few who chose not to find out for themselves and just decide the latter on the spur of the moment in the hurt they were feeling. And it celebrates the many that have asked the same question (as I did) and chose to really look into it from their own integrity. I have not personally heard one ‘bad’ report from anyone who has looked into what it is to be superhuman as presented by Universal Medicine, who has genuinely made the link that yes, we all are capable of being superhuman!
I second that Simon. We all have a choice to discover who we are and our superhuman potential.
It’s amazing that what we feel like in our bodies reflects to us how we are or are not enjoying everything else… I know for me, when I am feeling great, I love my work- all the people I meet and the people I work with. This is what building a relationship with ourselves does… Let’s us enjoy everything.
Thanks Felicity –your beauty, delight and wonderful sense of humour shine through in your writing. I especially felt inspired by the responsibility you take to reflect and not let the same issues recreate themselves every day.
Beautiful sharing about your relationship with work Felicity. How lovely it is to go to work and truly enjoy it and not be looking at the clock waiting for time to go on a break or home or dreaming of being anywhere but at work. I am looking forward to there being more people who enjoy their work in many different fields as it is an absolute blessing to deal with someone who loves their work.
Deep appreciation to Serge Benhayon and the Universal Medicine Practitioners who demonstrate by their livingness that no matter what kind of work we are doing by changing our attitude and by being more loving and truly caring for our-self and others, work can be not only acceptable but a truly joyful everyday experience.
Hi Felicity,
Thanks for sharing that, it’s so true what you say, and my own experience mirrors what you have experienced.
And you know, it only gets better and better and better… Enjoy
What a joyous transformation for yourself. No longer wishing your life away for retirement but actively serving those around you. Inspirational!
Felicity I really recognise myself in many ways in what you have written about your earlier approaches to your work: the ‘trying’; the ‘perfectionism’; the wanting to ‘have all the answers’ and the subsequent burnout and my dis-harmony within my workspace. I am really appreciative of your words ‘I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough.’ My intention is to now carry this powerful package of words with me as I head off to work today.
Just what I would have said Helen.
I love the positiveness that seeps out of this article. I know many nurses who are so so run down and burnt out by the system, and running themselves ragged to try and take care of others. In these people I often look deep in their eyes to see someone who genuinely cares for people and wants to help humanity, but they do it at the expense of their own health, life balance and happiness. I agree with the author, that there’s nobody teaching young nurses that it can be another way – and thank God for Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine, who have given us a key to unlock a caring and self honouring way, to ensure that we feel strong and empowered at the end of the day!
To this day Felicity I still feel the pressures at work to do everything right. What I have realised is that by supporting the right person at the right time is more rewarding and why I love my job too.
Wow this is inspirational. Wanting to actually go to work, even as we approach retirement age, because it is such a joy. Imagine if that was what most people experienced – how different the average work place would be.
So inspiring Felicity – and I love the simple reminder of not having to be perfect and ‘be there to fix people’ but rather to just simply breathe and be, and know that the quality of presence that we carry is the true support for ourselves, as well as those around us.
Yes Jane, and I feel from us all who have embraced it, there will be a way forward for self care to become a foundational aspect of nursing education.
This is fantastic Felicity! Way to go!
Felicity, I can’t hear and read and feel that one often enough: “I don’t have to be perfect. I don’t have to know all the answers…” Especially in the health-care-industry, there is such a strong consciousness of “having to be perfect”. It seems that also the people with those ideals tend to choose such a working field. Amazing, that you broke this consciousness at a working place with so much pressure on a day-to-day basis.
It is very inspiring to read how much you enjoy your work now and that it is possible for all of us, no matter the circumstances.
Felicity I can so relate to what you have shared. In fact I gave up clinical nursing due to feeling the burden of the responsibility of feeling I needed to do it all. Due to the support of Universal Medicine, I too now enjoy going to work everyday which is simply amazing! Thank you for sharing your experience with the world as I am sure many people like me can also relate.
Felicity, I love your blog and relate to it, as when I was Nursing it was a labourious job for me; shift work, and the physical load was at times exhausting. The capacity to connect with others was the saving grace and I stuck at it for 15 years before changing careers. I miss Nursing, not the workload, but the connection to others it brought. My work now is probably not dissimilar – I still see and have the opportunity to connect with many people – but I can see that without nurturing myself I will lose that.
I love the approach and fun and particularly what you write:
“But the best news of all, was that I didn’t have to beat myself up over the past, I could learn and gradually alter the way I was living so those issues did not recreate themselves every day”.
I’m still learning everyday and recognise Universal Medicine offers a path that can bring joy to others by just being connected to ourselves. Such a simple recipe that we all seem to complicate!
Finally the “I notice how letting go of judgement of others frees them and reduces the tension between people” is the icing that brings the enablement of others. Thank you Felicity, your blog is totally inspirational.
It was lovely to feel the great appreciation for Universal Medicine and the support you have received, I can certainly echo that. What is also lovely to read is how that made a big difference not only in your home life but also at work. If we all took the same level of responsibility, companies would indeed be far more productive and enjoyable places for everyone to be. What’s great is the rest of the nursing staff get to be inspired by you. Thank you for sharing Felicity.
Thank you Felicity, I’ve worked as an AIN in an Aged Care Facility for nearly three years now, and like Bianca have experienced much of what you speak of. Many staff have come and gone; good dedicated staff leave through injury and burnout, while others leave because the work is too demanding and doesn’t fit the ideal they came with. What is lacking, as you say, is the love and care for self and others and a system that truly supports that. As my love grows inwardly it radiates outwardly, and it shows on the faces of all the residents I care for. Thank you Serge Benhayon and the Universal Medicine Team for showing me the true loving way.
Self care should be one of the first things you are taught when you enter a profession, for it is obvious that if you cannot care for yourself then your care for others is compromised. An inspiring blog Felicity thank you.
Thank you for sharing Felicity, I can relate to so much of what you have expressed. I work as a registered nurse and it is only through developing self-care and self-love that I have been able to continue working in the nursing profession. Without the presentations of Serge Benhayon I would not have developed these qualities in my life. Caring for yourself so you could care for others was not discussed during my time at university either. I was taught that to be a good nurse you needed to put the needs of the patients first. I have witnessed first hand how nursing in this way leads to burn out, hardness and not liking being with patients. The more I live in a deeply caring way and support this self-care to continue while I am at work, the more I enjoy working as a nurse.
The idea of learning to care for yourself first, before caring for others, is so true and makes us so much more capable of providing quality care for others. Thanks for sharing Felicity.
It is great to see a nurse that does enjoy her work. I too am a nurse and I too go to work with much more joy than before. I think you touched a very crucial point here, self care is not paid attention to in university, and it could be one of the reasons why there is so much burn out in nurses, and health problems and obesity, when actually I have met in the nursing profession very beautiful, special and caring people, that unfortunately put others first and end up very exhausted and drained.
Felicity I can relate to what you have not that I am in the profession but rather living in disregard so to speak. It wasn’t until 5 years when attending my first workshop facilitated by Serge Benhayon that I became aware of how I could stop being a yoyo dieter. Through taking responsibility for the choices I was continually making that were in turn affecting my health and well being I have since lovingly lost 70 kgs. Which shall never return as the love the I now hold for myself is far more powerful.
wow Felicity, you changed your life and your whole outlook in life, and you did it yourself in the most natural way. I am really glad there is people like you out there alive and alert, full of joy, bringing true care wherever you go.
Very inspiring Felicity. Yes, whatever is going on in our day it always comes back to US and the way we have chosen to live. It’s so great to have this clarity and experience the empowerment this brings when we actually choose a loving way to live.
What an amazing transformation Felicity, very inspiring.
“Were they superhuman or very good fakes?” A natural question to ask when you first observe the practitioners at the Universal Medicine clinic. So true Felicity, there is a willingness to engage with clients and work colleagues alike, a dedication and a steadiness in the way they live. It’s for good reason that they win the People’s Choice, Business Excellence Award. Most certainly not faking it.
Rosanna well said, there is no faking there, just absolute dedication and support. Showing how life at work can be truly enjoyable and rewarding no matter what you are doing.
Yes we are definitely not fakes!
A great article showing that ‘work’ is just part of our daily life and it is how I am with myself that I and those around me will feel.
This is a great testament to the power of self care, and how much the relationship we hold with ourselves affects every other part of our life – thank you.
A very inspiring blog Felicity. Thank you for sharing all your insights which I can relate to fully.
I loved this blog Felicity as I can relate to seeing and feeling the steadiness with the Universal Medicine practioners, which never fails to inspire me. Their level of dedication and commitment to how they are with everything everyday is unprecedented. Thank you for reminding me.
Very inspiring turn around and great blog about something that many of us spend a large proportion of our life doing – working. Imagine if work was not just something we had to do to get money or security, something we had to endure and put up with for 50 odd years, just so we could retire only to find out bodies are in steep decline! What a ridiculous but extremely common state of affairs this is. Imagine if we woke up every day and actually really looked forward to going to work because we felt so yummy in our bodies and so clear in purpose that we could not wait to get out there and share it with the world. Now that would make the world look like a very different place.
I agree Andrew, it’s crazy almost no-one enjoys working, yet we spend a huge proportion of our lives at work. There is a universal attitude that we have to work, and it’s a necessary evil, but never something we’d choose. I personally love to work, and have no problem in choosing to work days nobody else wants to work (i.e. boxing day!). If we were all to enjoy working, how different would life be for everyone?
There does seem to be a common pattern of people just counting down the days to the weekend, the holidays, retirement, yet the fun that is available each day if we are open to it makes not working seem rather empty – could it be our bodies are designed to work? It is definitely worth considering that how we are approaching our work will have a big impact on how much enjoyment we can get from being there.
These words you wrote really hit home for me Felicity: “I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough.” I have just recently begun to really apply that same approach to my work and life in general, and it feels like a giant weight has been lifted off of my shoulders; as if I had previously felt responsible for saving the world and always looking like I was intelligent and having all the answers at work. This came from a false sense of not being enough based on years of not truly taking care of my body. I now realize that something as simple as going to bed early can build that self love that allows me to let go of a negative self-image. I can see how important it is for people in the healthcare industry need to be examples of self-care for their patients, and you have certainly shown you are an inspirational person doing just that, Felicity.
I feel the same about those words, Michael. I used to want to offer advice, fix things for people. It never really worked and I felt less because nothing changed. Now I don’t try and do that anymore, and just let people be. And if that allows them to see the possibility for change, it’s ok, or if it doesn’t it’s still ok, because now I am responsible for my own choices, no one elses.
Great blog Felicity, it is amazing when we stop wasting energy trying all the time, that we actually do get more done and are more efficient too. Also being present makes a huge difference too. Customers feel this and hence would respond in a more positive way. It’s also beautiful that you now love your job that you no longer even want to think of retiring.
What an amazing transformation Felicity from someone who was never keen on work to never wanting to retire and now living a life full of purpose and commitment. Super inspiring.
It was a real delight to read how you have turned a misery into a joy by your willingness to be open and make different choices.
Hi Felicity, I re-read your blog today and could really feel your commitment to life and who you are. I could feel you taking that out into your work environment. Inspiring, thanks
How amazing Felicity, to be able to turn around your relationship with work, patients staff and yourself. I love the way you narrow it down to developing self-love, choices and responsibility… saying “No” and knowing you don’t need to have all the answers. What an eye opener that being very present, loving and connecting to people can bring such joy to our jobs, what ever they may be. I totally agree that presence is a wonderful key to life.
How lovely is this to read! What stood out for me was this line;
‘I learned about self-love, choices and responsibility and how that impacts on my interactions with all others, whether I like it or not…’
Simply said, we always have a choice, and it will always impact those around us..ALWAYS.
So what you have shared here is that if we see the potential in what we’re doing, the absoluteness that we can offer – then we have made the choice to make the most out of each moment, each interaction, each day at work.
That is just amazing, and its there for every single person to choose
I love the way you bring yourself to work and for others to see how it’s possible to be the same whether it’s Monday or Friday. I like how you trace the day back to how it started, if it hasn’t gone well; that’s inspiring to read and I’ll definitely try it. The steadiness and consistency is noticed by all, as you have noticed it with the Universal Medicine practitioners. It’s great examples for us all.
Thank you for sharing. I have always been surprised and not understood why self care was not part of training when it comes to health practitioners. It does belong in the curriculum. You hear of so many people who are ‘burnt out’ in ‘caring’ roles. I worked in supported housing and at that point often felt very exhausted because I took on the issues and emotions of those around me going through difficulties in life. I have learnt to still be warm and caring but also have a level of observation when it comes to being around other peoples emotional energy. And I have learnt o responsible for my own emotional and draining behaviour. I still offer great support but I am not worn down by issues that arise.
Wow, Felicity, so inspiring. I was sitting here before my working day, wondering how I was going to get through the day. What stood out for me was how you trace back to how your day started and then no blame, just make different choices.
I didn’t go to University, but at a much younger age I learned that I had to do everything right and have all the answers as often as possible, placing myself under that enormous pressure to be perfect. I still get caught in it, but I too have learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. And, this is all from the simple teachings offered by Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine workshops, so very precious and practical.
Thank you Felicity. Deeply inspiring article. I love how you say that you don’t need to have all the answers. That it is enough being there, connecting. This is so freeing. In work as well as life in general we get stuck on having to have all the answers when in truth turning up being ourselves and connecting is enough and all else unfolds from there.
Felicity I love this, so simple how it’s all about us and what we choose. And your realisation that you needed to be present, that’s it, be there, that’s enough is pure gold, no more trying, so much less effort and most of all everyone gets to feel the joy of you. This is gorgeous.
I did retire, well to be more precise I was retired, unable to work, exhausted by putting everyone else first, with no regard to my own well-being.
Since meeting up with the Universal Medicine team and making different choices, I have gone back to work, in fact I have 3 jobs. I am totally re-imprinting what work means. I have so much fun now..and I get paid!
Dear Felicity, wow you have described such a huge shift, from disliking work to really enjoying it. I can really relate to where you say: ‘If I have a day at work that doesn’t feel so good, I trace it back to how MY day started…..and it usually makes perfect sense. No-one to blame, just more choices to consider.’ When I have a bad day I have often blamed work, rather than taking the responsibility to see that something is not right in me, and I created that day to be the way it is, and it is often about the depth of care I am giving myself, or rather the lack of it.
Thank you Felicity. your article is very inspiring. I too have been learning from Universal Medicine about self care and the responsibility I carry everyday with others, building love for myself. Self care can bring such a different quality to others in all walks of life and lines of work. ” I simply have to be very present and loving with people and let them be ” .
Love this Felicity! Can really feel how much you love work now! I have recently become painfully aware of the detrimental impact of trying so hard. It’s such an odd one, the harder you try, the harder it becomes…. I’m working to try less and be still more as a way of conserving my energy but also enabling me to feel what is needed, I would say I’m not “there” yet but in reality I am, I’m just so used to not feeling or rather overriding what I’m feeling that I’m being fooled into thinking I can’t feel!
Having been in hospital a couple of times I notice how tired the staff are but on engaging with them can sense how they do love the people and the job. If only they applied self care the time in work would be more fulfilling as you have shared, Felicity. Thank you.
I remember that awful feeling of wanting something to be over so I didn’t have to feel the discomfort of it any longer, and that made me tighten and harden my body in the effort to get through it. Then the feeling of relief when it ended very often took me into comfort eating. This is no way to live, such a waste of our lives, but when I look around I see and hear how often people dread going to work and only use it as a means to enjoying themselves at weekends. I can still feel that old tug in myself even though I know when I now go to do my volunteer work in school I now focus and enjoy every minute. It is hard to shift that consciousness because as a society we have separated work from play, whereas the way you describe, Felicity, work IS play!
This is very inspiring Felicity, taking responsibility for how you are at work and the benefits this brings to everyone, patients and work colleagues alike.
“I learned to enjoy building the love in me enough so I can actually bring it with me to work and my family” This is beautiful Felicity. Years ago when I was nursing I remember going to all-night parties then straight onto the ward! So much disregard- for myself and for the patients in my care. As you say, even now there is little emphasis on self care in the work-place, although it is coming in some areas. Since discovering Universal medicine I too am learning that “I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough.”
Thanks Sue
Yes there is nothing more rewarding than bringing the love we are, into all areas of our lives, including work. Work is never a chore when we feel the true value we bring with us every step.
Really inspiring, thank you for sharing this Felicity.
This is fantastic Felicity I love this ..”I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough. I have also noticed that I seem to be able to do my job more efficiently, effectively and safely when I am not wasting energy on trying all the time” I too have realised that the less I try and the more present and aware I am the more I get done.
…how simple life is when we stop blaming others and start to live responsibly for ourselves. Thank you for sharing this.
I really admire the level of responsibility you take for the quality in which you now work and for the knock-on effect you know that has on patients, colleagues and visitors. To even be considering the impact of your mood on the wellbeing of those in your care, to the level you so clearly do, strikes me as ground-breaking and yet at the same time as a blindingly obvious way of working. So why aren’t we all living and working this way?! You’re an inspiration for others in your field and beyond, because what you describe is applicable to all walks of life where we interact with and impact others.
Thank you for sharing Felicity, it’s lovely to read the change within your work with the way you’ve approached things and the support everyone feels from this. A great reminder to take into my week.
I have also become aware jstewart that ‘work was something that had to be done rather than a joy and a vehicle through which to express myself.’ Having been inspired by Universal Medicine courses, this has recently changed and I now love going to work and expressing my tenderness and beauty at work.
Harmony and joy in work and the working environment I feel is the most important thing for me in my experiences with everything and everyone and comes from my daily loving choices with myself in every moment.
Thank you Felicity.
“I notice how letting go of judgement of others frees them and reduces the tension between people.” What a great point, Felicity, and so true. As I do that so my interactions with people have been far more relevant, meaningful and light-hearted.
A great blog as for so many, including myself before meeting Universal Medicine, work was something that had to be done rather than a joy and a vehicle through which to express myself.
I totally agree jstewart, before coming to Universal Medicine work for me was just a means to pay the bills. There was never any joy in how I worked and was mostly seen as an inconvenience because I had to get out of bed. Now, work is something I look forward to and I have actually stated to my wife that I love my job. Why the change? – Simply because the more I started to love myself and take responsibility for my actions the more I began to take the whole of me to work which then gave me a totally different perspective on how I was living my life.
Well said Jonathan and Tim, for me, yes work was something that needed to be done, but it was also something I could do to prove myself to others, to my parents, to prove that I was a success, that I was doing well. It meant that I only wanted jobs with a certain air around them and would see others as menial and beneath me. One of the greatest gifts I have learnt from Universal Medicine is that it does not matter what I do rather the energy I do it in that is important. I now, when I don’t get caught up in work, measure my ‘success’ by how I have been with people not whether or not they have bought something. It is soo easy to measure output or figures as success yet if my body has suffered as a result of it, if I have not been fully open and loving with everyone that day, then something is not right and so it is not truly successful. I have found it is easy to do well and excel at something by pushing myself – but my body then suffers and no one gets the true me, rather a stressed and agitated version of me!
This is a great blog Felicity. I too had those same views about work before attending the presentations of Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon. One thing that really opened my eyes was the fact that if I had any issues that were not dealt with I would be taking them with me to every person I met and that is what they were getting from me. As a London bus driver the opportunities to feel frustrated or angry are plenty so I know my responsibility is to make sure the passengers at the next stop get the real me and not the residue of someone else’s actions.
Love your comment Tim. Wonder if it isn’t the responsibility of all drivers, whatever our vehicle, to deal with the anger and frustrations that can so easily sneak in and be part of driving and be more aware of the energy that we leave in our wake.
It’s lovely to read of your experience at work Felicity and how you changed your whole feeling about work around with the support of the Universal Medicine presentations. To also stop wasting energy on worrying about not having all the answers, I wonder how many people don’t enjoy work because of the pressure to be someone. Very inspiring that you were able to connect with yourself and appreciate what you bring as a nurse. Bring on the day when they teach self care to all medical staff, in fact everyone everywhere doing any kind of job.
This huge shift from enduring work to loving work is something so many people who are choosing The Way of the Livingness have experienced. I have found that when I step into work connected to myself and joy-full about the hard work ahead, I am ‘fed back’ by every interaction.
It’s lovely to read how your life has unfolded from the before and after attending presentations by Serge Benhayon at Universal Medicine courses. I love your reflection of the consistency of the way the practitioners work, and how you looked at your choices.
Your journey mirrors mine, learning about choices, self love and responsibility. I used to feel the same about work in the past being very overwhelming, but am now working past retirement age and loving every minute. It’s an amazing journey to share with you Felicity.
This is so lovely Felicity, thank you. I recently started work as a carer and can relate to what you have written about “I can see and appreciate how much people respond to me being very present with them”.
I can relate to everything you have written, but from a teacher’s perspective. I had the same burn out and resentment of the education system and a feeling of being squashed by it like you did with nursing. Already at the age of 31 I was looking forward to retirement! Then came Universal Medicine at the age of 34 and everything changed. I have also learned to look after myself and self nurture. Now I love my job too!
This is so important for all of us, to care for ourselves first and foremost before equally caring for others.
Thank you for sharing your turnaround and that there is another way to approach work in caring for ourselves first. Even though this article is written in relation to you as a nurse, it is transferable to any profession as there is a level of responsibility in every job as we all bring the quality of how we look after ourself and live to it. Inspiring, Felicity!
A beautiful journey Felicity, presenting self care to students will come, when we humanity ask for it and that asking has begun. The presentations of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine have inspired you and me, all the student body to connect and live love so now you inspire others in your livingness and in this blog which reflects it, thank you.
That’s amazing Felicity. I have always enjoyed working but recognise it came from not feeling good enough and as I was good at work that was enough for me. Now like you I love work, more because I feel bright and alert and vibrant as a result of understanding myself and my body and making more loving choices in my relationship and care of myself. This too has been inspired by the teachings of Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon.
Hi Felicity, what a timely blog for me to read exactly today. I am feeling the impact my choices have in my state of being and just realised that to the no-one to blame for these choices applies also for blaming myself and not just blaming others or something. ‘More choices to consider’. Thank you for this revelation.
” I learned that I don’t have to have all the answers for me to be of use; I simply have to be very present and loving when I am with people and let them be. That is enough.”
beautiful – thankyou Felicity. As an ex-nurse I remember feeling as you did – over whelmed by the enormity of the misery in the hospital of both staff and patients, and my own misery too. We were never taught to care for ourselves back then- and maybe student nurses still don’t receive this awareness yet. Since coming across Universal Medicine I am now aware of how my choices, of thoughts, words and deeds, impact on everyone around me. Choosing to be “present and loving” is the way forward.
I love your commitment here to your presence. very inspiring.
Love it Felicity – I too have experience a dragging kind of feeling to go to work, after I finished a tough day at school there were times I just wanted to go home and escape (watch TV or eat), when actually the best possible way to not take on the energy/let go of the day was to work and focus on the joy of supporting other people.
This is very inspiring Susie and something I will try myself more often.
Loved that Susie, it helped me to see how sometimes I come home to escape from the world.Thats a huge revelation for me about the habits I have at home, that I don’t have any where else.WOW! Thank you for your insight.
Thank you Felicity as Gail says you have written for us all, what ever profession we are in, we need to take care of ourselves first, look at how we are and this can make a huge difference in the whole work place. i know when I have pushed myself on previous days, I start to become anxious that I will be able to get through the day. That anxiousness comes out in everything I do, as I try to cope with the day. I want the day to finish and this comes out in how I speak and how I walk and in all my movements and people can feel this.
Thankyou for sharing your experience Felicity, I love how you acknowledge there is no need to beat yourself up about how you did it in the past, but simply choose from here on in to do it another, more loving way. You can be my nurse anyday 🙂
This is indeed a great point Suzanne and I too loved reading how the ‘beating up’ does not help at all and we have the opportunity to simply make a different choice. It feels a bit hard in practice because of the familiarity of the previous choices but it is inspiring to see that we can break this cycle with brand new choices.
Great point Suzanne and as you say Priscila it can be hard to break the cycle but as Felicity shares, it is possible. “those UM practitioners are not superhuman or fakes, I have learned they are people just like me.”
This is a SUPERB blog, Felicity, and provides ways people in any occupation can support themselves to work more efficiently, effectively and safely. It’s wonderful to not be wasting energy on trying all the time and have a brain space free of distractions because of one’s choice to be very present and loving and make no judgement of the people you encounter each day.
Your welcome Ariana, we are all in this together and you could hear it, so thank you for your openness
Thanks Felicity .. Yes all the sharing of stories that I have read and UM has brought awareness around my past.. family , friends and work.. Moving forward ..
Thank you for your blog Felicity. Writing as a nurse makes it really obvious that the Way is to care for yourself first and then caring for your patients is naturally more enJOYable. The hidden beauty in your blog is that it translates for everyone – no matter what their profession. We need to care for ourselves before we can do our job in a caring manner. This is just as true for a secretary or a janitor or a car mechanic, because we are all in the business of caring for others.
Well said Gayle. I expressed that just yesterday to the wife of a colleague who cares for the elderly and vulnerable. Even her bosses tell her the same thing. I explained to her that the level of care we have for ourselves is the level of care we will have for someone else. She understands but still she feels the need to put others before herself.
Yes Tim. I know for a long time I thought it was selfish to put myself first. Now I’m learning through the teachings of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine the truth of what you and Felicity have shared – ‘the level of care we have for ourselves is the level of care we will have for someone else.’ This is so important in the work place, especially if you are in a caring profession, but I’m also aware how this applies to every area of life.
So true Gayle. We are all in the business of caring for others and that starts with ourselves. A beautiful article Felicity.
So true Mary, we are are all in the business for caring for others, so it’s very important we start with the self.
Well said Gayle and Mary – whatever job we are doing we are looking after and caring for others, bringing this to the fore brings a new purpose to going to work. Also as you rightly say we have to start with caring for ourselves first and then we can truly care for others.
I felt the truth of us all being in the business of caring for others Gayle. Every interaction we have is an opportunity to ‘make someones day’.
I totally agree, Gayle. I work in a retail environment and have found this blog translate itself perfectly. I too have learnt it’s super important to take care of myself first, otherwise it’s just a show I put on for others whilst my body gets exhausted from the false front.
Agreed, I don’t (on the face of it) work in the care field, yet there was much in Felicity’s blog to help me as I go about my working day. The reminder that we do not have to ‘fix’, and have all the answers was particularly helpful. I also loved Felicity’s sharing that ‘simply being very present and loving’ is enough and explanation of how it frees her ‘brain space’.
Thanks for sharing how your attitude has changed through making more choice to be aware of how you are. I feel this way too.
Thank you for lovely blog Felicity.
I too can relate to all you have said-
Coming from a hospital based training I have for many years felt I needed to “fix” or “rescue” patients from their ills-like Florence Nightingale, who was my mentor when I started nursing in 1981.
Oh- What a relief and blessing when I too came to realize, with the help of UM, that I can just be Me- that is enough!
And I am not responsible for the patients’ state of health if they deteriorate- it is not a reflection of the care I give them.
I am now learning to let/accept patients and staff be where they are at, and not judge them for their ill choices to live their lives.
Today I feel less burdened and more vital, and look forward to going to work – bringing the love that I am to everyone I meet.
Felicity, I like how you said when you are having a bad day you trace it back to your morning and it makes sense, and there is no room for blame here, rather just an opportunity to review and maybe make different choices. For myself I have found this a vital part of loving myself rather than berating myself, thanks Felicity.
I love your description of this awesome turnabout from outer-based to inner-based living Felicity. What a beacon of light now shines at the hospital touching all the staff and patients, and indeed, all the world.
Well said Lyndy. I love this blog and its inspiring tale of how we can turn our lives around by being more responsible for how we are in our day, how much enjoyment this brings to everything we do, and how it affects everyone around us. ‘Outer-based to inner-based living’ – love it!
I too love how Lyndy describes the process of taking that responsibility over “my” life. In fact I really feel the ownership in her words. I too can express the benefit and contrast to a life where I look back in my day to look at my choices, and why I might be feeling the way I am feeling. Good or bad It makes the moment about reflection, appreciation and fun. Reminds you in an instant that you are living and have a responsibility to yourself.
I like the way you have explained this Phil, reflection, appreciation and fun, a great approach to taking responsibility.