819 thoughts on “Two Doctors and a Patient”

1. There are some really abusive and disturbing things that happen in the world, and watching the news regularly or reading the newspaper can highlight the negatives, it’s so important that we do see the acts of love and care in the world, and see the inherent decency in people.

2. ‘…the bottom line is, we are in this business because we truly love to care’ Yes, that was exactly what I was feeling while reading this blog. There must be great love for people, to closely work with them in such difficult times. This needs to be appreciated more as a service offered with care, repairs us much more than just the physical. Thanks for your reflection on that, Jennifer.

3. The ridiculous thing is Susan that all we would have to do to care for ourselves and others more deeply is to stop actively not caring. Caring for and indeed loving ourselves and others is as easy as allowing ourselves to be taken by a current but we fight it constantly, we kick and thrash around, we put constant effort into not caring and not letting ourselves love and be loved. Crazy isn’t it? But true.

4. Just one person deeply and truly caring for themselves makes more of a difference to the whole of Life than an army of volunteers who are in disregard for themselves digging a well for a village in Africa and that is because each of us is a interconnected patch of Life and so how we treat the patch of Life that is us effects the patchwork quilt of us all.

5. Jennifer, what a beautiful read, even though we may not observe this on a daily basis, to know that this still occurs is lovely to read about. We tend to hang onto the ‘what is not’, rather than the ‘what is’.

   As health care professionals, there must be something within us to care about people, otherwise we wouldn’t be in this profession.

   Anything is possible if we just give it a go and allow the true care to come though us. It doesn’t have to come from being dutiful, it doesn’t need to come with emotions, it just comes through with genuine love for people. We just need to keep the simplicity of it all instead of being caught up in the calamity of life.

6. What’s so beautiful Jen, is that you noticed that you notice the communication between two doctors and a patient. When we are fully present, tender and loving with ourselves we are more present and observant of others and world around us.

   1. Kehinde, isn’t it fascinating when we are present with ourselves we observe more of the beauty of the world. When we are caught up in the calamity of life and the negativity we seldom observe this. Amongst the rubbish and nonsense that goes around in the world, there is more caring and love around. We tend to focus on the lack or the negativity, then the richness and love around us.

      If we then placed our awareness or attention to the latter, what would the world and life then look like?

      1. When we love life, life loves us in return.

7. It’s absolutely gorgeous when we can clock a godliness in our everyday ordinary, and that makes me realise it’s that we appreciate, confirm and inhale – our very natural normal, so that we can exhale in expansion.

   1. The fact that we’re always looking for God in the extraordinary means that we miss Him every time. God is in the ordinary, He’s in the me and the you of Life, He IS the me and you of Life, that’s exactly what He is.

8. At the core of all humans lays a deep care and love for each other regardless of our religion, race, creed or profession. It is a deeply gorgeous thing to watch this surface so naturally and so beautifully. It is the truth of who we are.

9. Hence we need to change our system, as it has lost the deep meaning of why we are in the profession, to truly care in our most loving way.

10. Reading about your own appreciation for how much you have changed is very inspiring.

11. I used to have negative beliefs about doctors and Western Medicine but that all went out the window when I attended a presentation by Serge Benhayon at a Universal Medicine event and he spoke about the importance of medical care as part of our self care. I have since made many changes and see my doctors regularly and have had some surgeries, what I have experienced is very decent people working in medicine who genuinely care about others, and I’ve also appreciated their skill and expertise. It’s truly wonderful what human beings can do when we work together with a common purpose to care for each other.

12. When one person in a group, or hospital ward, lives with love and care this can inspire others to choose the same medicine for the benefit of all.

13. To let go of the protective armour of ideals, beliefs and hurts that we have chosen to contract and harden ourselves over with, also heals the deep separation these emotions have perpetuated.
    “One thing that I have come to understand is that we are all genuinely caring and this is our true nature, but sometimes for whatever reason we don’t allow ourselves to show this”

14. This is a great example about being caring and even loving at work and we can live that way all day, every day. It is actually more fun to live that way.

15. When a doctor takes the time to connect with their patients and allows time to talk and discuss matters with them, they get to feel the depth of care that is being given to them, and how lovingly they are being looked after too which make a huge difference to their recovery.

16. “One thing that I have come to understand is that we are all genuinely caring and this is our true nature, but sometimes for whatever reason we don’t allow ourselves to show this” – this is very beautiful, something I would want to deny flat out on some days, but true nonetheless. Thank you for clocking and capturing this moment of ordinariness. This touches me deeply.

17. The sad fact is that we have lost touch with the truth that we all are beings in a human body, equal in essence, and all equally deserving to be treated with love, honor and respect wherever we are, who ever we are with and whatever we are doing. That this is not our normal highlights how far we have digressed in our self-indulgence and self-importance to allow abuse to be accepted in our relationship with ourselves and one another.

18. True Jennifer we are all truly caring beings but we allow hurts, systems, investments to name but a few, to come in the way and than it seems we don’t care but when we start to remove and let go of this ‘coloured glasses we start to see there is so much more to observe of care in action and I agree everyone who works in the healthcare system is truly loving to care.

19. Doctors go into the profession because they care and want to help and they are in a system that is buckling under extreme pressure whereby they are pushed to move from one patient to another at pace sometimes. To be able to stop, take a moment and also to be able to share that moment with us so we too can add to the appreciation is a blessing – thank you.

20. To focus on what is wrong and missing in another, means we fail to see their true essence and this limits both of us.

21. Jennifer, I love what you share here. That you noticed the quality of conversation between two doctors about their patient in the first place and then your honesty about yourself and how you’ve changed. It’s easy to generalise about the medical profession and doctors (I’ve done the same in the past) and a blessing when we move on from this and begin to see and appreciate life and people in new ways. I’ve met many kind and responsive medical staff in and out of hospitals and I’m hugely appreciative of them. And even when I meet those who are less responsive, I’m learning to be with that too, without reacting. Remembering always, how we are with others, reflects how we are with ourselves.

22. Whenever I have been in hospital I have always been touched by the genuine level of care that the majority of the staff have given me.

23. It’s very beautiful when we express our appreciation.

24. The dedication and care from doctors and other medical staff is often overlooked when a patient, or a patient’s family want an answer now. The emotions bubbling away often take over and with it the clouding of the fact that this person is in this profession because they care and want to make a difference. It is simply that sometimes the outcome the patient wants is not possible.

25. Two years on from writing this blog I realise I now love doctors. I have had the opportunity to work with doctors and get to know them at a whole new level over the last few years. What I love the most is how caring they are, how dedicated they are and how they love true support. Not being told what to do, which is what I think I may have done at some point. They love being part of a team, which is no different from anyone. They are not special but they are darn right amazing.

    1. Important proclamation to make ‘ I now love doctors’ They (along with nurses)are life savers, work in intensely pressurised environments and most do truly care. When we break down distinctions between medical staff and give equal value to all of them, I imagine makes for great team working.

       1. Yes it does indeed Kehinde. Working in the community setting, I speak to a lot of GP’s over the phone. Not always having the opportunity to meet them face to face. I got to meet one today in fact and it was a joy to meet each other, because of the contact we had had over the last 2 weeks. Team work with doctors means so much more now.

       2. Jennifer, I sense the beautiful ripple effect of you fully honouring yourself and doctors you work with – the essence true team work.

    2. This is gorgeous Jennifer – as you have deepened your awareness, you have a deeper level of appreciation for the medical staff teams you work with. I agree with you -Doctors are amazing and so to are all the staff who are part of the greater team working in every job in the hospital.

       1. Appreciation allows us to see people on a deeper level and seeing people on a deeper level enables us to appreciate them. I have found appreciation to be the most transformational tool that I use at work with the team that I lead. It is a natural motivator and far more effective than criticism and threats.

26. I have noticed the more we care for ourselves the easier it is to care for others, and we also notice more of our surroundings and what goes on, which in turn makes it easier for us to respond to what is needed.

    1. Yes it becomes so normal. I don’t realise it is not normal for others till others point it out. We are each reflections for each other of deeper levels of care and kindness.

    2. Yes, this is a very strong feedback loop, especially when we are able to deal with the times it becomes difficult to care.

27. Wherever we are when we express in a caring and loving manner that can be felt. So too can anger, frustration and sadness etc. It is important to feel these things and dig them out by their roots. Our conscious choice of expression holds much responsibility.

28. When those in a hospital environment all care for each other there is a healing that is deeper than seeking a cure of symptoms of a patient.

    1. Love and care heals, this kind of infection we don’t ever want to control.

29. You can erode a person’s sense of self and make them perform as a machine according to the standards set by a society, but you can never take away the capacity we all have as humans to connect deeply with each other.

30. It’s like when disasters happen, and it gives people the opportunity to be in true community… The thing is, imagine not having to have illness or disaster to allow ourselves to fill this deep and innate connection.

    1. Great point – to live without the correction in place, is to live the future now.

       1. Exactly… And the more people understand this, feel this, and live this, it provides a reflection that is not there in the world now, it gives people the opportunity to feel that spherical quality that is our true nature.

31. Yes, once we know love in ourselves or even just know love we can see it wherever it is.

32. I wonder if this is why many doctors enter the profession as, as Jennifer demonstrated, it allows them to express love professionally.

33. This is such an amazing reminder. Thank you, Jennifer. And I am also finding it to be true that when I can truly appreciate myself, I am naturally more available to observe and appreciate others for just being who they are.

    1. ‘Just being who they are’. It’s funny isn’t it how we all strive constantly to be someone or something else when all along we are the absolute gold. Our depth and our beauty are unparalleled anywhere outside of us and yet our eyes are permanently fixed on the Horizon of Nowhere which is permanently outside of us.

34. A beautiful blog. I have always found that it leaves a glow when we express love, the way the doctors did or in any other way, even very commonplace ones like shifting our body to a more suitable position.

35. A beautiful moment of appreciation Jennifer – to be appreciated.

36. It is so important to acknowledge and appreciate those moments of true care, however small they are, whether they are for ourselves or if we observe them in another. In doing so we deepen our love and understanding for each other and ourselves, and our own value, and then we are inspired to do it even more!

37. My local GP is the most caring doctor I have ever personally experienced and when you are with her she is so genuinely caring and never in rush to get you out the door and the funny thing is she is always on time with the time the appointment was to start even though she sees so many patients in a day. It shows we can be caring and not in a rush but still get done what we need to do.

    1. That is a rare GP. If she could share that ability and how she came to this amazing point…

38. I think it’s well worth appreciating moments of true quality that we clock, no matter how seemingly ‘small’ we consider them to be, not to take them for granted or dismiss what we have witnessed.

39. Life is full of moments that are full of beauty that we avoid registering or miss out because we are not present. When we start registering them, we find them all over.

40. Beautiful to read Jennifer, I had that sort of attitude for a long time following my training in naturopathy, an attitude that was well and truly bred throughout that course. I too have discovered many, many deeply caring medical professionals along the way, particularly now l’m prepared to see them clearly, without the blinkers I had on for the first few years of my career.

41. When we care for ourselves we see the care in others. If a person complains that there is no care in the world then maybe it’s because there is no care in their world – between them and themselves. Rather than there truly being no care in the world.

42. ” the bottom line is, we are in this business because we truly love to care.” – It’s important to express and share the truth underpinning every profession, otherwise we can get lost in the details and exhaustion of a ‘tough career’ (whatever it may be) and lose sight of just what we’re giving back to humanity.

43. It’s interesting to clock that although we may know what is going on around us, we may not always be aware of the detail and care that goes into so many things. Thank you Jennifer for highlighting this, as to be an observer of life allows us to deeply appreciate others and what we all bring to the world, and the innate care that we all have within us.

44. Thank you Jennifer, and goes to show how everyone has the ability to connect to the care that is naturally within us, sometimes it just gets buried under the hurts we allow ourselves to live by.

45. Our quality of interaction with others is directly related to how we are feeling within. So if we are rushing our interaction will reflect exactly that – rushed, abrupt and maybe even incomplete.

46. Pick any professional and add conversations of deep love and care from those they serve and then watch the potential of humanity to heal.

47. The pressures on the medical profession are extreme, but even amongst it all, I have seen a deep level of care and love for patients, often masked by exhaustion, overwhelm and being so pushed to perform and see a never-ending stream of patients. If we brought more of this innate care and human quality into our health care, making it a genuinely person centred approach rather than a outcome based one, then Doctors would have more space to be people expressing their care through the profession of medicine, rather than being like robots in a system in crisis. It is proven that human touch, care and kindness during recovery is vitally important, but we cannot give to another what we cannot first give to ourselves – therefore self-care as a minimum for our health professionals is not just an investment in them, valuing them and all they give, but is an investment in the health of all of us who may one day become patients.

48. When we are open to everything and everyone and yet solid in ourselves we pick up on what is needed. When we are holding preconceived ideas or a personal agenda then this awareness is often delayed or even not there at all.

49. It is easy to go through life and become disillusioned by the lack of love and care that people treat each other with so I love that you have shared that as you have become more open, tender and genuinely caring of yourself, the more you have seen this in others…. It is also then, when we live this as our foundation, that we are able to not only observe what is all around us but also bring true care to another, reflecting to them what is possible.

50. A beautiful observation, I love when I get more of an understanding for people. We can be so quick to judge but I bet if we all spent one day working in each others field, we would have a deep appreciation for what a day looks like for other fellow human beings. I think we would come to the conclusion that we are all the same, we all struggle and we all care deeply but as you say, sometimes, for some reason or another, that care can be hidden.

51. ‘As I ponder on why I am observing this now and not so much before, I can only put it down to how I treat and care for myself. The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.’ True Jen, when we care for ourselves there is more space to observe, to truly feel what is going on around us and to appreciate others for who they are and in this example for how they care.

52. This is beautiful – what a piece of writing , a shared truth of what we all might have on the tip of our tongue to express, but find it quite difficult. We all are there because we love to care, but at the same time we struggle with care in our own lives and for ourselves, hence that should be all we pay attention to this moment in time.

53. Only yesterday I too witnessed two doctors discussing a patient on a maternity ward, where I volunteer. They were being so caring and taking a broader picture into perspective. Being a former nurse myself I had a picture of hospital doctors from back in the day, when I witnessed consultants – especially on ward rounds – talking over the heads of patients. Great to see changes in 2017, nearly fifty years on!

54. “The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others”. This is so true Jen, that the more we embrace certain qualities in ourselves, the more we naturally see them in others. As some would say, “like attracts like”, so really this is a beautiful confirmation of you also.

55. There is always something to observe, and learn.

56. Thank you Jennifer, I can sometimes get a bit negative too on the fact people don’t care, but actually everywhere you go people express the care they feel for others (including strangers) in various ways. It may not fit the picture of what we want to experience or think care is, but the care is still present.

57. Thank you Jennifer for highlighting just how important is for us to reflect who we truly are, that essentially love is our true way of being. As you have shared we often can get caught in emotions, losing sense of who we are and behave in ways that do not represent who we are. How healing and powerful is it then to be reminded of the truth, to be met with a reflection of who we really are and the love and care we all do ultimately crave to live, be met with and share with each other.

58. The day is full of these moments. Our appreciation is what makes them shine and be seen for what they bring

59. An amazing alchemy occurs time and time again if we see people for who they truly are. Even the toughest and most disheartened of men can turn around and meet you with the care and tenderness they naturally are. The world needs us to behold it, in the truth of our essence – it is then that the harsh pains and sorrows melt away and the essence we have within, starts to shine through again.

60. We all do care, that is so true Jennifer, and despite how at times life may not look like this, underneath it all we do. It’s such an important reminder to look underneath and understand this and to know that how we live affects what we see, so the more we show our care for ourselves and others in the world the more we see care and the more we create a space for all of us to express our natural care.

61. We can miss so many moments filled with joy when we choose to not observe. Observation energises and supports us in our day.

62. ‘In fact I am now a keen observer of all that goes on where I work, and there are many exquisitely beautiful moments between patients, relatives, cleaners, kitchen staff…everyone in fact’ This is true also where I work Jennifer and I find, if I open my eyes to observe, each day offers new moments of beautiful connections.

63. Reading your blog today Jennifer I am realising how, if my level of self care is low, it discolours how I see the world. It is as if I have put a cloudy filter over my eyes so I don’t see the beauty around me.

64. “You may be asking, so what’s so special about this, surely it happens every day?” On the contrary, it doesn’t happen enough. Or maybe if I handle myself with greater care as you have, I will see it around me more also?

65. It is so true that the more we connect with our true loving and caring nature or essence and become more understanding with ourselves in our imperfections when we are not expressing this essence, the more we are like this with everyone else.

66. Something worth remembering at all times: “we are all genuinely caring and this is our true nature, but sometimes for whatever reason we don’t allow ourselves to show this.”…hence this allows us to drop any judgements about another person, and to know that deep within we are all the same and all genuinely caring about each other.

    1. Henrietta that is a beautiful way to view people, that “deep within we are all the same and all genuinely caring about each other.”

    2. Appalling isn’t it that when we are all so genuinely caring that we can construct a world that is so barbaric. Barbaric may sound like a rather strong word to use but I feel it’s very apt. For me it’s not just the fact that we live in a world where we are able to kill, maim and torture one another, it’s that we live in a world that on a day to day level we are all so comfortable with being so horrible to one another, be that in the way that we behave towards each other, what we say to another’s face or behind their backs or even simply that we can think dreadful things about each other. And what’s so awful is that it’s so perfectly normal to most of us that we don’t even question it.

67. This reminds me of my friend who was taken into hospital for stomach pains and ended up in a ward full of women who had liver damage and complications due to drinking too much alcohol. One conversation a Dr had with a young woman who had two small children was that she was going to die within the year if she did not stop drinking. He was very up front with her, but this directness stopped my friend in her tracks as she realised that there was no accident she was admitted onto this ward. At that moment she was feeling her choices and realised that she had to change her life, and the way she was living.

    1. What an awesome doctor and human being. It must take a lot of work on expression for doctors to be able to be so direct with others and thank goodness they can be. It’s very inspiring considering the directness we may avoid ourselves in our personal relationships.

       1. I’ve found that directness – or being very absolute can be very stark but can be very loving. Love isn’t about wrapping each other up in fluffy words, sometimes it’s putting a stop to an abusive way of life.

68. People place a great demand on Doctors by constantly expecting them to heal them by correcting years of lifestyle choices made (and sometimes continue to make) with a procedure or some tablets but we must never forget that they too are only human.

69. Great blog Jennifer which has made me ask myself how much are my eyes willing to see throughout my day and how much any ideals or beliefs I have can discolour what is true.

    1. Awesome questions to ponder Jane.

70. I sometimes wonder if nurses secretly like to hear patients complain about how uncaring, rushed or dismissive their doctor is. This news gives value to the nurse, a niche they can fill by being caring, attentive and dare I say it, self-sacrificing. Nurses can significantly undervalue their own worth and this comparison with doctors can bolster their lack of inner worth. What needs to change for nurses is that they value who they are and what they bring, without any comparison or reliance on what we do for others. We all bring something unique to healthcare and our patients, that’s why we have a team.

    1. I have seen the same but with doctors viewing nurses in an inferior way to bolster their own false sense of self importance. Either way, the comparison erodes the quality of care a team can deliver. When a team can approach their work in equality and knowing the value each person brings no matter the job role it’s a very different experience for all involved. Equality makes for a much more enjoyable and harmonious work place too

71. I love how you wrote that you are a keen observer of all that goes on where you work and I guess everywhere in your life, there is so much care to observe when we have opened our eyes or should I say our hearts for the love that we are and that surrounds us.

72. I agree Susan and it is a revelation to most, as most believe that love comes towards them from another, when in fact it comes from them towards all and everything. Love is an emanation therefore when we are emanating love, whatever it is that we do or whoever it is that we are with, will be embraced by that love.

    1. I love how you have put this Alexis. Love comes from us towards all and everything. It’s not about grabbing at it, when we are feeling empty or bereft of it, as we haven’t given it to ourselves. When we feel this way we should be the first person to be with and consult with. This will grow that intimacy with ourselves and as a consequence refill us as love comes bubbling up from within.

73. Jennifer, I agree, there are many beautiful moments to appreciate when we become an observer of life

74. Absolutely beautiful when everyone works together as a team, taking responsibility for the care of the patient and those involved not only on a medical side but also those on the patients side too.

75. As the article is saying I am sure this care goes on every day but most of us don’t see it or appreciate it or bother to express it to another, after all we are too busy. It goes to show when you take a deeper level of care to yourself how you can then hold this with and for others around you. We for so long have been taught and told to take care of others without turning that care to ourselves first. We treat it as something we need to do and not something to live first. I remember back and also even now the easiest person to see or listen to is someone that has lived what they are saying. As they say anyone can say anything but it is those that live their words that lead the world truly. If you are seeing around you a life that appears it is void of care then bring that care you are seeing is needed to yourself and keep bringing it and then bring it some more. We should never stand back when we see something is missing, we should roll up our sleeves and treat this as a point to go deeper with ourselves.

76. It is true what you say, we are all naturally caring, as humans this is normal for us. We are not perfect and we are forever learning and letting go of what does not feel true. Our openness and tenderness is what supports to go deeper.

77. It is beautiful to feel your appreciation not only for the interaction you witnessed but also for how your increasing levels of self-care have increased your awareness. No doubt this is felt by your colleagues and supports them as they work in often challenging circumstances.

78. A very beautiful observation and particularly about yourself. There is so much we don’t allow ourselves to see as there are also many things we do not want to see. But with this picking and choosing we can never see the whole picture and remain very limited in our understanding of ourselves and others. How beautiful that we can start to see more by simply bringing more care and tenderness to ourselves, as the more we feel at ease with ourselves and in our body – which self-care and self-love bring – the firmer the ground we are standing on and the easier we can meet the world with open arms and eyes.

79. It is true, we have a tendency to see the negative more than the positive and also only talk about things when they go wrong and not when they go very well.

80. ‘The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others’ This is so true. And it is great when we allow ourselves to express our observations around this and to also express our appreciation too.

81. The reason people work in the medical industry is the fact that because deep down we all truly care for one another. Sometimes it is only the dictation of the system we work in that is not supportive in having full attention for the clients we work for, as we have made other things such as administrative tasks more important.

82. It is good to be reminded to see the beauty in life, thank you.

83. “The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.” The reflection of one person more open, tender and genuinely caring with themselves inspires this in others.

84. It is easy to only or predominantly see what repels and disappoints us and then withdraw from life, being confirmed in the arrangement we have made with life and people, and so it is healing and necessary to see what we are capable of as sentient, compassionate beings, actually actively see it in everyone even if it is just a potential, and then meet another seeing and honouring that potential. It changes our view of and attitude towards life radically.

85. Jennifer, thanks for the reminder that when we take the time to stop and notice, there is so much to appreciate in what is going on around us.

86. This is so true Jennifer and great to be reminded of the fact, ‘One thing that I have come to understand is that we are all genuinely caring and this is our true nature, but sometimes for whatever reason we don’t allow ourselves to show this.’

87. We can miss so much by our ideas about how things should be, rather than what is before us.

88. Jennifer your story very beautifully shows the ‘super powers’ held within true observation. We have the ability to enrich our lives beyond measure if we simply make the choice to ‘observe and not absorb’.

89. I love your blog because it takes us beyond what we see, it takes us to understand doctors and nurses and the care they clearly have to be in the profession they are in. The health service is under enormous financial pressure and this puts pressure on the staff who work in those facilities as there is constantly an assessment of affordability rather than addressing need. The staff on the front line are often the ones who have to deal with not having the special tape or whatever else was out of budget.

90. Great observation and validation of the fact that it touches us deeply when we witness deep care and engagement in others; it is, after all, a big part of our true nature.

91. Of course all those that enter the medical and care profession come with an essence of genuine care and love for and of people, it’s simply in our nature, however not always portrayed through our behaviours. What your article teaches me Jen is that we can have no judgement on another for the day they may be having and thus their attitude at that moment but what we can do is connect, listen to and hold them in the essence that we know they are from.

92. Lovely to read about the two doctors you observed, Jennifer. People go into the caring professions because they do care about people. It’s great to read and be reminded about this. Many years ago when I was nursing on the wards, it was common for doctors to talk over a patient in bed, as if they weren’t there. Disregarding and rude it felt to me at the time. I trust that things have changed a lot since then. My personal experience recently as a patient would confirm this to be so. I have had great experiences with the doctors, nurses and cleaners alike.

93. It is important to observe and acknowledge true care when we meet it. So often doctors are criticised for focussing on task rather than person and treating people as patients not human beings. It’s great to have this example of truly caring doctors and of your own evolving self.

94. Thank you for reminding me that all too often we see what we want to see. We look through our eyes and receive an image but sometimes that image can be distorted by what we have experienced, so we may see doctors who look rushed one day which confirms to us that all doctors are always rushed rather than be understanding about what might be going on in the doctors world that would have meant they were rushed.

95. “As I ponder on why I am observing this now and not so much before, I can only put it down to how I treat and care for myself. The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.” This to me is a beautiful line to read as it confirms to me that the more I care for and am in appreciation of myself, the more I can see ‘love at work’ everywhere I am.

96. There are many amazing things done, and care shown to people in so many ways by doctors and nurses and midwives in hospitals daily.

97. It is amazing Jennifer how, as you say, as we start to observe and treat ourselves with greater care and tenderness, we start to notice the way others do too. It is beautiful to know you have opened up and are able to see this happening all around you in your workplace too, and recognising that this could have been happening before, but you weren’t open to seeing it then.

98. A hospital setting is the place where we can see the best of humanity shine through, where care for others is foremost. Even if I have experienced some Doctors who can be brief and impersonal, I have also experienced many who are deeply caring, and other hospital staff who have clearly devoted themselves to supporting others in ill health. All this is done in spite of the system, not because of it, and that makes it even more impressive and well worth appreciating.

99. It goes to show if we care for ourselves and genuinely start to heal our hurts, anger, frustration, bitterness, resentment, ideals etc we are more open to seeing the care that is all around us.

100. This blog shows what I have often observed and felt in my own work as a health care professional. That generally speaking it is not the people that cause the problems in our health care system but the system itself which does not support true care and equality between everyone in it.

101. “The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.” Absolutely true this has been my experience too. When I appreciate and honour myself I see and feel it reflected all around me.

102. This is particularly visible in the health care field.

103. The more we improve the quality or livingness of our work, the more we are able to notice when others do the same and it is quite joyful when we notice.

104. I love the fact that you can see dedicated people in most workplaces, sure there are systems that control and make some cynical but the fact that others are able to stay caring within these systems suggests there is something we can choose in each moment.

105. i love the end of this blog, and the appreciation that the more we care for ourselves, the more we are aware of the care others provide. It is very true – and to observe what goes on around us can offer us so much.

106. Great sharing Jennifer. Often we can focus on the negative and it’s lovely that you clocked the interaction between these two doctors and their patient. I have to say that in my many hospital visits I’ve always found the doctors and nursing staff to be very caring and most of them with a great sense of humour which no doubt helps given the stress and busyness of their working environment. It’s always good to bring understanding if at times they may be inattentive as usually it’s because there are patients who are in greater need at that time or they may be concerned about a particular patient.

107. We have a similar thing with guests… some seem to attract problems, woes, negativity and if something is going to go wrong, somehow it’s a guarantee that it happens to them. While others are open, warm, present and the place and the staff seem to flow effortlessly round them. It’s interesting what our movements attract.

     1. Yes Simon, we really do set up our own field of expectations, negativity brings a negative response, love is reciprocated, we always reap what we sow.

108. Great blog Jennifer. Reading your blog reminds me of when I used to be so afraid of doctors and hospitals. From Serge Benhayon’s presentations I have built and am deepening love and care for myself and now when I visit the doctors or hospital this is what I see and experience from them and appreciate the care they have and give.

109. How deeply beautiful Jennifer, to not only observe but to acknowledge and appreciate what you did observe. Especially what you wrote here “As I ponder on why I am observing this now and not so much before, I can only put it down to how I treat and care for myself. The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.” I also have found the more I can bring awareness to myself, how I am with myself, I can then bring that to others.

110. It is interesting how we can have a negative experience with say the GP and then taint all of our experiences there after, and forever hold that person in that energy. I had a similar situation where I took my daughter to the local GP and he told me there was nothing wrong with her but she ended up being very ill that very afternoon, and thank god the midwife was doing her rounds and advised me of what to do. This same GP years later tended to both my mother and father who died of cancer and he was so caring and reassuring to them.

111. What a beautiful example of letting go of long-held beliefs only to observe something very loving and caring. I love your honesty and tenderness Jennifer, the deep level of care you have for yourself and others is evident.

112. This gorgeous blog brings to mind the commonly used expression ‘is the glass half empty or half full?’ How we choose to be makes all the difference in how we view the world.

113. Jennifer your blog confirms that ‘beauty is in the eye of the beholder’ – the world is like a giant mirror reflecting back the truth equally for all but many of us use various forms of protection that blurs or reduces our vision.

114. It’s true, we put a lot of effort into not caring for ourselves, treating ourselves recklessly and even abusively, and this must have an impact on the quality of care we can offer to others. The more we learn to look after and truly care for ourselves, the quality we offer to all is so much greater.

115. It is so true the way we view others and the world is strongly dependent on how we view ourselves. This statement offers much explanation and wisdom into why the world is the way it is.

116. During a recent hospital visit to see a relative, we arrived outside of normal visiting hours and as such had a brief glimpse in to the world of the hospital doctor. These highly skilled, dedicated people who had an entire ward of people to care for, make decisions for, ensure their recovery. And what was really sweet to notice, was how each patient was completely trusting of their care, and was willing to follow whatever advice given. So, although the health systems have got their issues and they are not perfect, at the heart of them is people caring for and trusting eachother.

117. “The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.” Our true nature is to care for others, and as we return to being loving and caring for ourselves our way of being naturally extends to caring for others.

     1. I agree Rosemary, as we open up to ourselves then we naturally open up to all others. As we let ourselves in then we naturally let all others in. We become a living two way street, much like the heart itself with its valves that go in and its valves that go out. And I feel that living in this way leads to a very natural transparency, an ability to be seen as well as to see.

118. Jennifer, what a wonderful reflection and confirmation you received from the observation of this interaction that in a hospital would be a regular and routine occurrence. The deepening of the level of care you are bringing to yourself feels like it is opening your eyes, in fact all of you, to so much more of what is unfolding around you, and as a result I am sure that there will be many more reflections like this one coming your way.

119. Much of the medical community are dedicated and caring of all of the patients they see. Appreciating the work and dedication that occurs each day helps us all take responsibility for the way we live.

120. Yes very beautiful blog Jennifer. It is sometimes so easy to look at all that is wrong but what I then forget is to appreciate what is there. True appreciation can do wonders, literally, as when people feel appreciated they can deeply change their ways in which they do things as they feel the beauty that is them and are inspired to bring that out.

121. I love coming back to your blog Jennifer as it shows what is possible and positive in the health system. It also demonstrates the enormous impact genuine care and consideration has on all involved.

122. ‘The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.”- Great observation and reflection Jen.
     In the past I too held a belief that doctors didn’t care about the patients as they were always in a hurry, sleep deprived because of their long shifts, and some had appalling bedside manners. However, now that I am bringing more care and value to my work as a midwife I am starting to see as a reflection other allied professionals doing the same.

123. I’ve had a number of medical procedures and appointments with specialist doctors in the past year, and I have observed how caring and attentive they have been – never rushing me and explaining things in detail and making sure I understand the procedures etc. In fact recently I was seeing one specialist and I wasn’t quite sure of some information and he went out of his way to call in a more senior specialist to answer my questions and provide me with the information I needed to make my decisions. I realise this isn’t everyone’s experience but I am certainly developing a much deeper appreciation of the care provided by many health professionals than I have ever had before.

124. We simply don’t appreciate ourselves or each other enough. So much of our time is spent picking people or situations apart. And this is easy because there really is no perfection with people or situations. There is always room for improvements so there is always something we can critique or criticise. But what if we took our focus off the imperfections and focused on the essence of people and situations. This would make a huge difference as this blog shares. It feels so important that as many of us as possible make the shift into consistently appreciating and be examples to others who may also be stuck in the cycle we once were of imperfection watching and criticising.

125. “The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.” This is so true Jennifer and it is lovely to see this in another and celebrate it.

126. “Bottom line is, we are in this business because we truly love to care.” I love this line Jennifer as it is true. We all in fact could be doctors and nurses as we are all innately caring people if we would allow ourselves to feel that and are able to set aside the false identities we have taken on to gain any self respect or self worth instead. Allowing ourselves to feel that we are innately caring would not let us need any of these false identities anyway and us all living this care and nurturing for ourselves and everyone we live with would change the world dramatically and is actually very needed.

127. ‘The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.’ This is momentous Jennifer! you are right on the money here! What we term ordinary/extraordinary must become natural and you are bringing this simply by your observation and the way you are with yourself. Inspirational! Thank you!

128. Vignettes like these two doctors as described by Jennifer show that doctors deservedly have a good reputation.

129. “The other super important thing here was the fact that I chose to see this moment, for I am now sure that there have been many such moments that I have not even noticed before. In fact I am now a keen observer of all that goes on where I work”, this is so true Jennifer, I am sure there are many moments we miss when we are not present with ourselves, so thank you for the reminder to be present and to choose to see these magic moments throughout our day.

130. Thank you for sharing Jennifer, this is a beautiful confirmation of the power of observation, and what an effect our ways of living have on being able to observe the caring nature of another. We create a perception of certain people, doctors for example. To not feel what we are holding back or not feeling for ourselves. It is great you expose this behaviour, and show the fact in practice.

131. I love this Jennifer, thank you for sharing. Through your sharing offers the opportunity for others to now observe and ‘see’ for themselves what does happen through people connecting around us. It is lovely to observe and take note and feel for yourself what it means to you.

132. We are in this business because we truly love to care. So beautiful and I feel that accounts for every job we do. We all love to be with people and work for people, even though we might think we don’t or act in a different way, but we do. We all care, regardless of what job we do.

133. This is true Jennifer, sometimes it can just be hidden under layers of hurts and protection, ‘One thing that I have come to understand is that we are all genuinely caring and this is our true nature, but sometimes for whatever reason we don’t allow ourselves to show this.’

134. When we unveil our eyes there is much beauty to see in this world.

135. “One thing that I have come to understand is that we are all genuinely caring and this is our true nature, but sometimes for whatever reason we don’t allow ourselves to show this.” This is so true Jennifer, we all do care and when we stop to really observe people it is gorgeous to see the extent people will go to show they care. I feel doctors today while still extremely busy know the importance of taking the time to talk and put the patient at ease by offering support and understanding.

136. This is such a beautiful moment to appreciate Jennifer. Doctors and other healthcare professionals often get caught up in the busy-ness and pressure of working within a struggling system that they lose touch with their true care for and love of the patients they work with. It is lovely to appreciate these tender and caring interactions and they do happen all of the time in healthcare. Thank you for sharing this moment Jennifer.

137. We can focus on the busy-ness all around us, the stress that is experienced daily by so many, the stresses and strains of modern life. But when this feels like it is all around us, perhaps that is because we ourselves are overwhelmed. Could it be that if we step back and introduce a little space, then we will see the love and care that is inbuilt into people and the things we do, and give us a bit more appreciation for this natural expression of love that is so prevalent as well.

138. It is great that you now observe life and see many ‘exquisitely beautiful moments’, between different people, as a result of deeply caring and being tender with yourself, ‘As I ponder on why I am observing this now and not so much before, I can only put it down to how I treat and care for myself. The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.’

139. I too am observing others in the way they interact with each other much more than I did before especially when done with equality and love. I observed my son at the dentist the other week and the care and precision with which the treatment was carried out was beautiful to watch; a confirmation of the developing self love and also opening up to others and allowing myself to feel.

140. What jumps out for me is how you write about the fact that you only saw this interaction between the two doctors because of the care and tenderness that you were meeting yourself with. My own experiences make me know that this is true. It is all there waiting for me. But I have to make the first moves.

141. Genuine appreciation of other is such a powerfully supportive way to live. It is definitely a choice and makes me consider how many beautiful acts there are taking place before my eyes and how switched on I am to seeing them unfold.

142. Amazing Jen! The medical professionals truly do amazing work! They’re pushed through an awful system, which expects so much of them, right from their first year as students. It would be lovely to see more Doctors dropping the guard and showing their true caring nature, which would be a blessing for all the health staff and patients as well as their own health!

143. We do truly love to care Jennifer and you see it displayed over and over around the world in so many different ways and areas. And I also agree with you that our own foundations of self care and appreciation definitely influence how we are with others and whether we are truly caring or not.

144. All too often we forget the fact that many are in medicine because they care. I have seen many professionals burnt out because that fundamental interest in being able to care for a patient is ignored or not appreciated.

145. People do love to care and to be cared for, despite our cranky attempts to show otherwise. In loving and sharing with others we get to feel the love straight back, it serves us all.

146. it is so beautiful for us to realise these words Jennifer that underneath we are all naturally caring and that this is our true nature. I joined a club of a hundred people recently and was amazed at how open and welcoming they were with each other. Of course we do have our off days but this does not negate who we truly are.

147. It is important to realise that most people in these caring professions do deeply care and are negotiating life as we are. There is so much going on for us and them. To be present in every moment is desirable and beautiful but not always what happens. Often I can imagine, the patient is going through pain and emotional reactions. That doctors are truly present in this at all is a credit to them. So many of their patients still consider that the responsibility for the disease belongs to the doctor. This must be something they negotiate all the time. I love that you witnessed the care and dedication of doctors, Jennifer. The more care and dedication we bring to ourselves the more others will be supported to express this too.

148. 18th century European philosopher Jean-Jacques Rousseau wrote in a nutshell that “We human beings are born good but society corrupts us” – we are naturally caring and loving but our ideals, beliefs and hurts come in the way of this natural state. I was visiting my Dad in hospital last week and I could witness the immense care the surgeon had for him before operating on his tumour of the ethmoid. His love, care and dedication for/to humanity seemed to have no boundaries. Thank you Jennifer for a great blog.

149. A beautiful sharing “The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.” This is who we are and loving and caring for others is our natural way of being. This allows true healing and is true medicine and the more we live this way the more we feel and see it everywhere.

150. Jennifer, these words need to be the slogan for all medical professionals – “we are in this business because we truly love to care.” – and from that care builds the foundation of healing for every patient.

     1. This stood out for me too Ingrid. This is the bottomline and why most go into nursing and medical work in the first place. Yet so much focus is given to the system instead of this founding principal that for many this principal is often ignored or forgotten. It shows how many of our medical systems are not truly based on this core principal.

151. I’ve always been a bit of a people watcher. There are many caring and tender moments between people that I notice and it always brings a smile of appreciation at these expressions of love which occur so naturally. I love your example Jennifer.

152. Yesterday I was in a cafetaria and saw the owner and his son gently taking a lot of care of the baking roster as well as the baking process. This was absolutely beautiful to watch. Coming from the heart, rather than it being a belief or a drive to do so. There’s indeed so much to appreciate if we but choose to see and connect to it.

153. If we don’t appreciate ourselves, the things that deserve to be appreciated, we can often come across a bit harsh as that is what we are being with ourself.

154. The fact that you were able to see and appreciate the moment between the two doctors Jennifer is very special; it is also lovely that you appreciate, that you observed, in yourself. Your story highlights the importance of appreciating others and ourselves.

155. I am very regularly deeply touched and blown away by how awesome and caring people are right across the board in every business, industry, at work and also just out and about. People as a rule are lovely and certainly most are caring when given the opportunity. It is just that we seem to give such a louder voice to all the ugly horrible stuff that some people do out of hurt and disconnection to their true selves.

156. This is so true Sally, the more open we are the more love and joy we are able to see and appreciate. Interesting that all of this is constantly around us but it’s not until we start to live it that we begin to see with more clarity and realise that we have been encapsulated in love and joy all along.

157. “I plan and prepare and have no other agenda, so I am not thinking about what to do next.” I have found that this simple tip is very valuable as this is how I am when going into hospital either for myself or to support another. I understand there may be a wait for whatever reason, so as not to feel irritated by this I don’t make other plans for after the appointment or am careful with timings, take provisions and plan childcare should I be held up. If I am taking responsibility in caring for myself then I can not but see that, despite the medical professionals being overloaded to the hilt, underneath they care and do the best they can considering the demands that are being placed on them by the system and patients. It is easy to forget they are human too sometimes and start complaining too quickly.

158. Thank you Jenifer for writing this blog and I have to agree that Doctors and nurses like yourself DO care and sometimes we don’t see that aspect because of our own stuff. I know that when I was uncaring towards myself I could not see a decent bone in anyone’s body, if you know what I mean. Today I can, and the observing thing you talk about is so true. We are not born hard and heartless and something happens or continues to happen that changes our very essence that we know and can see clearly in a tiny baby.

     On another note of real life example – at the busy hospital last week with my mother for a pre-op assessment. The whole day of tests, tests and here and there took around 6 hours. I had a choice to be me and go with it and of course I was very prepared. I had time talking to staff and patients and supporting my mother, which I know she appreciates. Long gone are the days of not seeing the deep care that doctors and nurses genuinely have, but what I can also see is how the majority are really exhausted with long shifts, dealing with emergencies and constant interruptions. I find these hospital visits give me a real pulse of what is going on inside hospitals and the state of our health.

     Today I am off to another hospital all day to support a friend before and after surgery. I plan and prepare and have no other agenda, so I am not thinking about what to do next. Whilst I am not a patient, I have 9 hospital visits this month supporting family and friends, so I really do get to see and feel the level of care coming from different doctors and staff and I am the first to tell them. I never hold back and I see their face light up literally.

159. The level of appreciation of the doctors in this story is so lovely, and I can feel that is something that is missing from our regard for Doctors in the UK NHS system, an organisation the UK government seem intent on pulling apart. Perhaps if we had more appreciation of the job doctors do and the media reporting of hospitals left more room for the personal positive stories we might value more the services we do receive. Surely such an approach would only enhance the level of health care we receive as everyone loves to be appreciated and valuing the work of others would only mean they were encouraged to keep offering high levels of care.

160. People that are drawn to work in caring professions sometimes have unresolved hurts stemming from their own life experience. It is so important for us to take responsibility in our choice to heal our own hurts that have developed the pictures, ideals and beliefs that we have been influenced by and carry into our work with others if we are not truly connected with our essence and expressing love and understanding with everyone we meet.

     1. Yes Margaret I agree some of the people working in caring professions have unresolved hurts. My experience is that if they do not heal their hurts they get ill sooner or later, and so this illness is for them a good possibility to deal with their hurts.

        1. Very true esteraltmiks often people do get ill from holding on to unresolved hurts. This happens to all of us at times I guess but I would prefer to try and be present and aware of my hurts and be aware of how much they hurt me and other and let go of them before my body needs to get sick to remind me.

        2. Margaret I agree, to let go of the hurts before the body needs to get sick to remind me is really the best thing to do.

     2. This for some is the very reason they are drawn to work in these areas, either to understand their own suffering or to feel better by supporting those in greater need than themselves.

        1. For some people focussing on what they perceive to be the greater need of other is a distraction from feeling their own hurts.

161. Something I observe in my work in Social Care is the importance of the connection between the member of staff and the service-user. I also see how all the policies and procedures, guidelines, codes of conduct et al are all about the quality of service and relationship with the service-user, but never quite seem to manage to ensure this ‘connection’ is in place. To me, this is because that connection is something innate in people and not something that can be trained, taught or imposed – in fact, it is my view that trying to impose such an ‘approach’ has the opposite effect – separating staff from their innateness and making them rather robotic, suppressing their human-ness. It is as if we are trying to eliminate the mistakes from life, by taking away what are seen as our human flaws – creating a pool of perfect workers but in so doing, losing that innate sense of being that brings that all important connection to others. Thankfully, that innateness is rather irrepressible and I feel sure, will eventually win through.

     1. Yes, Richard, we cannot be trained to be open and genuinely caring with others as it relies on our relationship with ourselves and how much we let love in and out.

        1. Yes, Janet, I agree. The training comes from the development of deepening our own self care and self love… something that is not found in any workplace educational training… as Jen shared in her blog the training is self initiated, starting with…” The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others…”

        2. Yes Richard, caring cannot be functional alone. For it to be truly caring it can only be based on a foundation of love and connection that we have with ourselves and others.

        3. I completely agree Richard, Janet and Johanne – how much we express our care for others starts with how much we express our care for ourselves. Being told to smile and fix such a look on our face when it does not come from inside or from our eyes turns a true smile into a grimace (rhymes with grim face).

     2. Richard, it seems that this is done out of fear. Fear that the system or people will be abused. But in this there is a lack of trust that people know innately how to connect, and that this is the most natural thing in the world.

     3. I agree Richard that connection is not something that can be trained or taught or imposed. But we have to start somewhere. It may be that training per se isn’t wrong, but methods and approaches used may be. Rather than training, we can offer learning workshops, based on self reflection, honesty, practice, communication and real accounts of patient’s experience. Where participants learn about energy, how what they do and what they bring the workplace affects the whole. It is possible to inspire staff working in hospitals and social care settings to want to make a difference to the lives of others simply by being true to themselves and putting people at the heart of their practice.

        1. Yes, well said Kehinde2012. I agree, there is a place for training – it’s what I do. To me, there is a clear difference – as you have set out here – between trying to copy the behaviours and actions of someone who builds true relationships – and allowing relationship to be facilitated through being who we are. And yes, there is much to be learned from self-reflection and the inspiration and reflection of others.

     4. Talking about procedures and guidelines – I work as an estate agent and believe it or not getting junior doctors through referencing can be very difficult. Recently I had two lovely junior doctors who had been non stop working for 9 years, and because they move around from hospital to hospital due to their training, I could not get an employee reference stating permanently employed, even though the hospitals are all in the same Deanery and they are guaranteed for so many years.
        Needless to say they are very angry about the situation and feel as though they are undervalued and that the system has been set up against them.
        It seems to me that they get it from both ends – patients who are unappreciative at times and an unsupportive system.

        1. Gosh that is terrible Julie and yes it certainly shows how the system has been set up against them and how we are not taking care of our precious doctors. I have heard many other horror stories about how they are treated even worse than that.

     5. It’s interesting that we tend to design these systems to reduce or eliminate flaws in our workplace but the focus is generally placed on perfection and procedures instead of our quality of connection. Like you shared aiming to create ‘a pool of perfect workers’ almost robotic, does seem to take the human-ness out of caring and it is then more about procedures and ticking the boxes ensuring we follow a certain guideline that is not necessarily catering for each person, patient, or scenario with deeper level of care but instead making us more busy therefore it takes us away from truly connecting with each other and what we are presented with.

162. Lovely to read this Jenny, and reassuring also to read … we humans are innately caring, and as we heal the hurts of separation we will rediscover the deep and profound truth of true connection, and how exquisite this is… our true state.

163. Jennifer it is easy to have stereotypical views of people – experience, upbringing, education and religion foster these beliefs in us. As you show, we can at any time start afresh and see people for who they are and not what they represent in our minds. Healing ourselves and the world is possible when we connect to the potential in all of us to be deeply caring human beings.

     1. It can seem so hard sometimes to drop all of our preconceived ideas, our pictures, our ideals, about who does what, when and how. If we however choose to connect to our essence all we can but see and feel is that we are equals and from that a true relationship can be built.

     2. By me learning to love myself more and therefore being open to loving others and allowing love in, I naturally reflect more love and innately feel a greater understanding for all.

164. This week I have worked in a GP clinic and experienced first hand the amazing care and precision that doctors have when it comes to looking after their patients, let’s face it they wouldn’t go through all the training if they didn’t love people. The problem is that there are systems that have become hard for doctors to work in, and the essence they can bring to their work is restricted. There is lots of miscommunication and misunderstanding between doctors and nurses as well as patients. Most doctors I see though truly care about people.

     1. I agree, harryjwhite. It is not the people who practise medicine who are letting us down, but the systems that they must work within which are letting them down, which means that the care we get from these doctors who are more stressed or overworked is more likely to let us down.
        I recently had a family member in the hospital here in the UK and was shocked to hear that the nurses in the intensive care unit were working 12 hour shifts with a single half hour meal break and two 10 minute tea breaks. They were absolutely amazing in the level of care they were giving, and it just made me wonder where as a society we are putting our priorities, when these are the people we entrust our care to when we are at our most physically vulnerable.

     2. My experience has been the same Harry. Recently I have been paying attention whenever I have witnessed doctors with myself or with others. In the UK GPs have been on a 10 minutes per patient conveyor belt for some time, which I can not even begin to comprehend. It can’t be easy, yet I have felt very cared for by them. And when I appreciate them and say so, they seem almost surprised, which shows how little people do express. This is an area most of us – definitely myself – could improve on.

        1. Exactly Golnaz! This always rings true “we are not what we do” classic example. Doctors are people too!

     3. I too feel the love for people that doctors have and their dedication demonstrated through their commitment to years of training. I saw my GP recently and felt his frustration about all the systems they have to work within. It felt rather like a conveyor belt of short appointments, followed by writing a prescription or arranging a blood test – with limited opportunity for them to ‘bring their essence’ to their patient. In a way though this reflected back to me the awareness they have of how important connecting with their patient as a person is and is something that is the heart of their work.

        1. Awesome Richardmills363, “bringing the essence” and as so so amazingly put it “the heart of their work” is what will make such a difference. Burnout/exhaustion levels will change, patient care will change and the truth of medicine will begin to be restored.

     4. Harry that’s so true, when I consider all the years of medical training, gruelling hours, exams, liability discussions then there must certainly be a real will and wish to help people. When you ask a child what they want to do when they grow up and they say “a doctor” you can more often than not feel it’s to care for and look after others.

     5. I like what you have said Harry. The box that healthcare practitioners are required to work within is restricting, and can be a source of reactions and complaints. However, when we learn to live fully within these restrictions, it communicates just what is possible for everyone.

        1. Absolutely Matthew! It even shows in the way doctors communicate with nurses, often coming up to them whilst they may be doing something, and saying “this this this and I need this” but I’ve seen that this is because their schedule is so tight. They have become narrowed and self focused, and essentially protective, not wanting to make mistakes and hence disregarding connection with people in the process.

        2. I agree with what you have shared here Matthew Brown and this applies to many service industries not only with healthcare practitioners.

     6. That is also my experience harryjwhite as I am working in a hospital I only can agree that most doctors and nurses are truly carrying about their patients but that some systems around them are not very supportive. These systems are mostly supportive to have a form of control over the costs – I can understand that this is needed – but my experience is that they are not designed to see the patient and their health first.

     7. Great point harrywhite the systems place a lot of demands and restrictions on both doctors and nurses restricting them from offering the true caring work they signed up for.

     8. Thank you for highlighting this Harry. It is so true that people who choose this profession are certainly deeply drawn to caring for people. But like any other profession when we lose sight of appreciation for what we bring and what others bring we can easily lose interest and quality in our level of care and therefore tend to function through duty instead of true care.

165. Jennifer its really lovely to read this and appreciate just how much we all naturally do care, how deeply we care and its simply the fact we’ve allowed the “busyness” of life and other things to get in the way of our natural expression of love and care for all others.

     1. Absolutely David, as you express your appreciation it struck me that this is exactly what is missing from us on the whole for our own caring nature and that in others.

     2. I agree David, the saying I have heard over the years is ‘I’m too busy’ or ‘I have no time’ and yet the truth is we always have time and we are never too busy to stop for a moment and act in a caring and loving way, so these ways of thinking are an illusion that we make a reality by the way we choose to live.

        1. I like what you said here Amina, all illusions and excuses.

        2. Ouch! The word excuse brings up a lot with our levels of responsibility and how far we are willing to go, knowing that we would love to be treated in the same way.

     3. So true David. We are indeed all naturally very caring, but when we are not it simply means we have disconnected from ourselves by choosing to be run with busyness and rush. Often we tend to choose this when our work load increases thinking we have to push and drive to get things done but our quality and level of care is then compromised. Leaning to not drop our quality of being or work no matter what our conditions or environment brings is key, by choosing to stay connected our natural caring nature can be expressed and we do not feel depleted of energy because we are moving in line with our natural way of being.

        1. It’s very important to really feel those excuses, we’re actually choosing the busyness over the love and care for another person, which means our life becomes about the busyness and not love, care and people.

        2. Yes I agree Laura. When you put it like this it seem so crazy, why would we ever choose busyness over loving and caring for people? It really shows how disconnected we have become from the choices we’ve made and are still making. When we are connected to ourselves and others, our natural way is to care and love each other unconditionally regardless.

166. “…but also connected to this patient as another human being.” – This should be the foundation for every conversation held on this earth. How many times of the day do we actually do this?

167. This is a brilliant and essential extension to all of our understanding of the health care profession. Taking care of each other – bringing care into our every interaction – is a super simple and hugely impactful practice. A something that just needs to be an integral part of any health care training.

168. We do all care. That is the bottom line. In understanding this we then know that what we are dealing with, in ourselves and others, that is not caring, is not the real deal but the layers we have adopted over time to ‘cope’ with life’s challenges. Getting back to the roots of our natural caring nature and appreciating it in others, are great opportunities to relinquish the false layers.

169. Thanks Jennifer , I really like this part “I can only put it down to how I treat and care for myself. The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.” this bring helps to bring appreciation acceptance and understanding into the picture of everyday life.

170. …”the bottom line is, we are in this business because we truly love to care” – and we have to remember this. Sometimes ‘the system’ and circumstances are pushing us into function and we lose the bottom line, lose our connection. But by noticing and appreciating caring moments, we give focus to our true impulse and stabilise our careful standing in the chaos around us. Well done Jennifer!

     1. Absolutely Sandra. Reminding ourselves of why we do the jobs that we do – because we love people and want to support them in whatever way we can – is a great step in re-establishing our commitment when things get tough.

        1. It is such a simple and easy thing to do: remembering that it is all about people. I take this into my day, into work, everywhere and remember it when things went not easy – Life and all is about people, not results.

171. Observing and feeling the true beauty and care we all hold for each other, is a beautiful gift, once we appreciate and honour our self and then get to feel what is on offer to receive a reflection of love and care back.
     The more I look at what I have set up for myself and the images I have put in place – that has allowed more love and care to emanate out of my body and blossom out the woman within for the world to see and feel.
     Everyone I meet these days whether at shopping, work, walking or at the petrol station, they get all of me – a hello, smile or a little chat.

     Jennifer really love your sharing and your observation in your everyday life.

172. I agree Susan, caring is our true nature and often we let our personal issues or fear of consequences get in the way of true connection with people.

173. Donna, this is a great reminder that when we choose to be impatient or frustrated we are not being caring and therefore not being the love that we are. These behaviours can so easily to slip into our daily life, as we focus on what needs to be done, rather than the quality we are doing something in. So often we continue without stopping ourselves and accepting that these patterns are not us. As I start a new day today, I am going to observe how often I become impatient or frustrated and look at ways to be more present and more caring in what I do. It is not something solely for the medical profession, caring is something we all naturally are and can be, whatever our profession.

     1. Hello Fiona and I agree. It’s important to realise that if we are being “impatient or frustrated” then this is in our “daily life”. We at times break the world up in pieces and say I’m only this way at work or it’s only this way when I speak or see this person or it’s only when I am driving I’m like this, but this is a dream and not reality, everything we do to everyone is there with as in every moment, every time. No breaks, just at times a different setting, face or day and so our living quality, the way we are with everything is important. So simply being in every moment and not pushing to the next or getting something done to get out the door etc is important. What we find is we don’t need to “look at ways to be more present and more caring in what I do” I just simply need to dedicate to presence and allow my body to be still in that moment and express my next step from there, then dedicate the same in the next step, the care is very natural from there because you are already living it.

        1. We become a Disco ball with all the small mirrors reflecting our light everywhere in very small bits and always in motion. As you have said Ray, we need to stop and be all we are.

        2. Love the Disco ball Steve and maybe showing our age with that but I agree.

        3. Yes, well said Ray. All life can be the same and there is then no compartmentalising, time outs, different personas or lesser versions of ourselves. As you say, all we need to do is commit to the quality of our presence by staying connected to our body and what we are feeling.

        4. Hello Janet and thank you. It all seems so simple but yet it’s not the norm. Life is about movement from one moment to the next. It’s not concentration, right or wrong etc but simply about the quality of our movement in and out of each moment of life no matter what the heading. Every ‘move’ counts whether typing on a keyboard or flying a plane, dedicate everything to every move.

174. A recent report on ‘doctor burnout’ has found in the US over 50% of doctors were suffering from stress and the shocker of the report was the increase of suicidal ideation, with the highest increase from surgeons. The ‘physician heal thy self’ needs help! Is there any other profession that requires a person to sacrifice themselves for the care of others at the detriment of self? What are the other 50% doing? They could be the reflection for the others, but without caring for your self first… the numbers are in. With the tools, training, medicine and self-care there will always be amazing medical professionals.

175. Thank you Jennifer I really like your appreciation for yourself and for the two doctors. I am working in a hospital as well and I too had such not so nice beliefs about doctors in the beginning, but that changed very quickly as I could observe how deeply caring they were. Every day they open up to the best of their ability to listen and to understand. What made me wonder is how sometimes patients treated them not in a friendly way and how they stay in contact and let the patient be. I love to appreciate our doctors whenever I feel to do so – in the beginning they were not able to handle it but now they like it.

     1. It is lovely reading both Jennifer and you have been making a point of observing and appreciating the deeply caring nature of the doctors, although at times they may show otherwise. I know from personal experience that although I am a deeply loving and caring person, it is possible that at times I react to the challenges of my day and lose those qualities – yet when I have others around me who appreciate and relate to me in a way that reminds me of who I am, it is so much easier to snap out of it and return to the love and care that is my true essence.

        1. I agree Golnaz: “I know from personal experience that although I am a deeply loving and caring person, it is possible that at times I react to the challenges of my day and lose those qualities.” And then I love it that our doctors were appreciating me – appreciation is really worth it and unfortunately so missed in our daily life.

     2. Most of us respond to appreciation in the same way that flowers respond to the sun, we open and we soften, appreciation really is an energetic balm.

176. We have the same system here, at least with my doctor’s surgery and local hospital. I am regularly deeply touched by the care I receive from both, and love to express my appreciation face to face and in writing.

177. Last night I was in Accident and Emergency at my local hospital. From the moment I arrived I felt the care of the lady that greeted me at reception. She was busy and focused but light hearted with me, clearly aware of my anxiety. I was then seen by a nurse without any delay who immediately relaxed me by telling me the information I needed to hear. He cared about how I was feeling and knew what was needed to immediately to put me at ease. Shortly after I saw a doctor who was equally caring and highly professional. The service and advice I received was exceptional. I felt truly cared for and well looked after by all of those I came into contact with and I observed the same caring treatment of those around me. It was beautiful to observe.

178. And as well, the more we are willing to see, the more we will see.

     1. Very true Emma – we only see what we want to see unless we are open to all that there is.

     2. Yes there is more to see if we open up the blinders. But then we have to handle that and maybe have to take back a lot of ideas and beliefs which did hold us ‘safe’ but also limited.

        1. And once seen, what action will we take? I have been posed with this situation numerous times recently and have wondered, what is it that needs to change here? Certainly, the re-claiming of my true insight is the essential first step and from there, walking each moment with truth, regardless of any discomfort.

179. “The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.”

     How amazing is this? A very beautiful formula for life.

     1. That is true emmadanchin and I like to add also such a simple one as well.

180. It’s incredible Gill that you’ve noticed a significant difference in the patients that are cared for and supported by the doctors, not only medically but in every area. I feel more emphasis needs to be put on this in the medical profession, as it is as important as the medicine itself considering the impact it can make.

     1. True Susie, in fact it is medicine.

181. Being naturally caring should be something we know about ourselves from birth, yet along the way for many this awareness is lost in the dramas of life, and competitiveness, comparison and jealousy flourish. What a shame because as you point out Jennifer – it’s us that are missing out, because caring acts are constantly available for us to observe and feel, and our awareness of this is certainly heightened if we have at least made a start to care for ourselves.

182. Our natural and innate way of being is love and therefore to be anything less than caring we are coming from our hurts or that which has tainted us to act in this way. Bringing understanding to others assists them to reconnect to the innate love that is there residing within.

183. “we are all genuinely caring and this is our true nature, but sometimes for whatever reason we don’t allow ourselves to show this….None of us are perfect and we have some not so great days. But the fact that we care does not alter.” I love this reminder as we can easily focus on our faults or appreciate our intention.

184. I was fascinated when I first started to observe Serge Benhayon in workshops – I especially noticed it when individuals were rough-mannered, he seemed to always see the most divine and precious aspect of each individual regardless of how they were presenting themselves and he always honoured every individual by addressing that which I now realise is the true essence of all of us. Always loving the person unwaveringly whilst noticing that which does not represent who they truly are and calling it out if that is supportive. This has been a great reflection of what a true loving relationship looks like.

     1. Beautifully shared Golnaz. Every person has a precious and divine aspect and people wouldn’t choose caring for others if they really weren’t interested. It’s not a profession that you can just go through the motions for personal gain.

185. It is more often than not our preconceived judgements of others that prevents us from seeing the deeper underlying truth of things.

     1. I agree Adam, the ideas we hold about people prevents us from seeing who they really are. When we judge another like that it is us who miss out.

     2. Your remarks Adam and Elizabeth bring up, if we have these preconceived ideas of others… what else have we closed ourselves down from feeling?

     3. Yes, Adam, we are very good at putting people in boxes so that we can make sense and cope with life, but we miss out on so many spontaneous gestures of love by living in this way.

     4. and if we have preconceived judgments of others…where are we at in ourselves?

186. The care of one human being for another is always a thing to behold, but particularly when one is impacted by ill health, it is an opportunity for care and love that is forever remembered.

187. What is interesting Jennifer is how your observation and this article show that our beliefs actually colour and control the way were are prepared to view the world or indeed perceive what is going on around us..”One of these beliefs was that I thought doctors didn’t care, being sometimes put off by their manner, which could be abrupt, impersonal and rushed.” You had blinded yourself to the caring nature of doctors you worked with…and missed out on the enjoyment of those small moments. Thank you for this great example of the limitation that beliefs hold us in.

188. “One thing that I have come to understand is that we are all genuinely caring and this is our true nature, but sometimes for whatever reason we don’t allow ourselves to show this.” And in this knowing it makes a difference to focus on this rather than the ‘bad’ otherwise we begin to only ‘see’ the lack of care others. Appreciation of ourselves and natural ability to care opens us up to much more.

     1. Julie I love what you’ve pulled out from the blog, the fact is that each and every single one of us is deeply loving and caring, yet in some cases we don’t allow this natural self to come out. As a result the very opposite of who we are can be the way we live our entire lives.

189. Wouldn’t it be great if we could all start observing the good things in people instead of focusing on the bad. I suppose it really does all boil down to how we view and treat ourselves as well. It would all make for such a better and brighter world.

     1. I love this simple question, statement. Divinely Beautiful, “Wouldn’t it be great if we could all start observing the good things in people instead of focusing on the bad.”. It’s like little kids, “I don’t like you, because you are not nice to me”. How childish. We’re often waiting to express appreciation to others because no one is appreciating us. Where it is actually so Lovely to both express and receive appreciation. And I understand that it might be difficult in the beginning to receive or express because we’ll be confronted with the fact how little appreciation we might have held for ourselves… But do we – as a society – want to continue this momentum or are we the generation that breaks it? With no perfection, I’m part of the generation that’s putting energy in more and more appreciating. And, it’s so Lovely! Worth having a go at… Thank you Kevin!

     2. Wouldn’t it just kevmchardy. All too often it seems that we have a negative experience whilst either visiting or being treated in the hospital and then forever more we carry that experience around with us and it resurfaces from time to time.
        I know from my own experience the more care I take of myself before and during a hospital procedure, the more positive my interaction with the hospital staff is.

     3. Absolutely Kev, ‘Wouldn’t it be great if we could all start observing the good things in people instead of focusing on the bad’, after reading this blog recently I have started seeing the good in people and it makes life so much lighter and more joyful rather than always seeing the negative.

        1. Hello Rebecca, I agree and use the word appreciate. For me if I’m seeing good or bad, right or wrong then I know something is out of balance in me. I go back to appreciating the simple things around me, the smallest gesture, things in my everyday. I know that if I dedicate to the appreciation of life around me consistently then that becomes my lived future. In other words, live life in a way that you would like to receive it. Don’t wait for the world to show you how to be but connect with how you truly are and live that now, the world will change because of the change you have made. You don’t watch for the change but you appreciate again and deeper to what this feels like in you.

        2. Gorgeous what you have shared Ray about appreciation. I have had thoughts whirling in my head and when I let myself appreciate what I have, who I am the support around me, it clears the fog so I can see a truer picture.

     4. Even in the bad times, when people have not lived up to the expectations we have, we can see the real person through the fog of who they are not. This helps to dissolve the expectations and instead focus on who they (and we) really are.

        1. During the bad times as you have said Heather people in these dark times shine even brighter in the contrast of their situation when we look and feel the real person.

     5. I agree with you Kev, It really is that simple to start changing the world by seeing the good things.

        1. And not just seeing the good things as there are some not so good things, we can’t turn our back to, but seeing what is true.

     6. Starting with what we ‘say’ when we look in the mirror? Are we criticising and judging, stopping on the surface of physical shortcomings? Or are we smiling from deep within acknowledging that we are so much more? Yes this is life changing and the ripple effects are endless.

190. Have we forgotten to appreciate ourselves long ago? It’s stunning what happens when you begin to appreciate. The whole world around you changes. I especially like the phrase:
     “None of us are perfect and we have some not so great days. But the fact that we care does not alter.” This is so loving and tender.

     1. I think we may have as a society forgotten to appreciate ourselves, and thus all around us the appreciation is diminished. Through appreciation the walls between us disappear.

     2. Hello Felix, I agree and when you continue to appreciate you see there is no boundary, no end and the only thing that stops this growth or expanded awareness is you.

191. What a great twist to the tale Jennifer, that yes caring things do happen and doctors do care, but your appreciation of this is wonderful because then as an observer you are breaking down images about doctors and showing that there is another way to relate and be. Awesome.

     1. All these human beings who choose to take the path of being a doctor are brave souls. They commit to support people at their worst, they deal with all the unrealistic expectations people have of being fixed, they work very long hours. Thank goodness for doctors.

        1. I agree, Heather. I take my hat off to anyone who has committed their working life to supporting others who are sick and ‘at their worst’. Perhaps we need to look more closely at the systems that make it hard for them to do their job, but also take more responsibility for why we get sick in the first place.

        2. True Heather. There is an unrealistic pressure and demand on doctors (that is ever increasing) as the world becomes sicker. The more we care for our own wellbeing and bring responsibility to the table, the more we allow doctors to do their real job without the unnecessary extra burden of dealing with patient irresponsibility and expectation that the doctor can ‘fix’ everything for them.

        3. What you share here Heather is very true and I have a new respect for my medical colleagues and appreciate them everyday now, whereas once upon a time I did not.

192. What I got so clearly from reading this today as when you hold a picture of how you think life or a situation is/should be, that filters so much of what you actually see. When you remove the filter, you can see much more clearly. For example, if you think Doctors can be uncaring, then that is what you will see even though they are deeply caring at times.

     1. Yes Sarah, it is always good to drop the picture and give ourselves a chance to see what is actually there. We can judge so harshly, and this does not contribute to a kind world.

        1. The pictures rule our lives, that is how we keep ourselves safe, by thinking we know how the world should be.

     2. Very true Sarah and this is the responsibility we don’t see for the same reason “you hold a picture of how you think life or a situation is/should be”. So if we have a picture of life or how we are suppose to be and act then you have a fixed point you always walk to and are ignorant to what else is going on around you. To see more, we need to make the change with how we walk through each moment, open up to possibilities. All life cycles around us and yet we are largely ignorant to those cycles and at times pretending that they exist for everything else but we live outside of them. Just the unchangeable fact alone will see us act and walk different, if we know everything we do and say is coming back to us at some point, how would you like to receive life? I’m not talking about physical possessions either, I’m talking about the quality of how you live.

        1. Ray I had a strong image of someone walking around with a selfie-stick but at the end of the selfie-stick is an image/picture of how to be/act and when you focus on that, you do not see the rest of the world around you nor are you open to the other possibilities. And thanks for the reminder that what you do and say comes back to us – I had (in) conveniently forgotten that – a good reminder and good note to self today. Check.

        2. Great to check in Sarah and thank you. We have always known this, “what you do and say comes back to us” and we still speak about this unchangeable fact in conversations but for some reason don’t adhere or dedicate directly to it. It’s not about being nice to everyone either, we are talking about a quality of living, a quality of presence that no matter behind closed doors or in the town square it holds everything and everyone in a deep care. We are society of compartments, world, home, weekend, weekday, family, friends but it matters not what the setting but always matters what the quality is. As we are saying whatever we are is the quality that is coming back, cycles remember.

     3. Well said Sarah and so true. We have allowed pictures to set us up rather than seeing the world for all that it is in each moment. To drop the ‘picture’ is to drop the control of how we expect things to be and allow them as they are.

        1. These are great comments and messages from God today – thank you.

     4. Thank you Sarah. Your comment offers a lot of clarity “when you hold a picture of how you think life or a situation is/should be, that filters so much of what you actually see.”

193. I recently spoke to a doctor about the care plan he and his team had devised for a relative. The doctor spoke with such obvious care explaining in detail about the decisions made and why, including what was likely to be causing the problem so I had the same understanding as he did. He treated me as an equal and with the full understanding of my connection to his patient. He was someone within a system that was no doubt asking a lot of him, yet he was able to choose to do all of his work with a deep level of sincere care for others. In the short time we spoke I felt truly connected to this doctor and as we finished up I gently said to him to “please take good care of yourself.”, and he responded with surprise and appreciation. I felt how much we all contribute to each other when we truly express our care. Doctors need this just as much as patients and families do.

     1. Beautiful Melinda. What a gorgeous reminder of the ‘human-ness’ of doctors – there are doctors that truly care and they all need self-care too, to provide this.

194. As I understand the language and of love and appreciation, it is easier to see in others as well as the fact that others for many reason choose to behave in a different way.

195. I agree, Jennifer, my experience of being in hospital was super inspiring, as I observed only genuine care and respect from the dedicated staff who looked after me.

     1. Me too Janet – I was recently in hospital for a minor op and the staff were very caring and supportive through the whole process. Inspiring when we consider some of the demands and pressures they are under in our health service.

        1. You cannot be in such a job without holding care for others as a deep value, even if it is not expressed perfectly due to the high demands of the system.

196. While care can be brought to how we do any job there is something quite demanding about working in health care; juggling time restraints, delicate situations with patients and their families, and even the personal strain of shift work is no small commitment. I applaud both doctors and nurses as no doubt that at the end of the day, from their hearts, they care. Could the care deepen? Absolutely, but as you found Jenny, only when the health practitioners care deepens for their own health and well-being first will this be possible without depleting themselves.

197. The experience described here in this blog clearly shows there is a lot of love and care in the world, we only have to be willing to see it.

198. Medical staff have a true dedication to care at their core. It’s palpable, just that under time, resource and cost pressure, they’re stressed from juggling too many balls and that’s what can get clocked as the primary experience when journeying through the system as a patient. The health and wellbeing of those who care for us is paramount and I only wish this were higher on the agenda in those places where they work.

     1. Yes Cathy, rather than try to push medical staff to squeeze the ‘most value for money’ out of them by extending their hours to such a level that their own self care will be hindered and patient care will suffer, why not go the other way, support our medical staff to have the time to truly care for themselves so that their mental well being and efficiency is at its optimum.

     2. Well said Cathy, and it may be that if medical staff dedicated more of their time to taking care of THEMSELVES that they would feel less stressed, more supported to care for others to the best of their ability and more confident in the example that they’re setting for patients.

199. When a person gets given news about a serious health condition it always has a big impact initially, much like a car accident. The initial impact is soon followed by how and why as the shock of the event starts to sink in. How we are as health care professionals matters enormously during this time, as it can bring stuff up for the for carers as well as it does for the patients themselves.

     1. This aspect of health care is equally important and perhaps opens up another role within healthcare, perhaps for a medically trained counsellor- able to handle clinical questions and help a patient to process and understand the diagnosis. After the initial shock passes this role could also explore those naturally arising questions like ‘how?’ and ‘why?’ Enter Esoteric Medicine and the role of a physician’s assistant.

     2. Knowing ourselves outside of our roles of ‘patient’ and ‘health professional’ helps us to truly connect and know a person beyond their mistakes or what they do.

200. Jennifer, thank-you for sharing your appreciation for this ordinary moment, it is truly confirming when the care we dedicate to ourselves is reflected back in others. I’m filled with wonder at the potential these self loving choices have to inspire a move away from the accepted rush and time pressures lived on a daily basis.

     1. There is so much of our lives that we choose to put ourselves in the pressure cooker and turn up the heat. Making self-loving choices removes pressure from our lives.

        1. Removing the pressure does take time and this needs to be appreciated.

201. ‘One thing that I have come to understand is that we are all genuinely caring and this is our true nature, but sometimes for whatever reason we don’t allow ourselves to show this.’ Isn’t this just crazy? – in not showing it we are actually not living it either. In effect we are choosing to live something else that is not us and we actually go as far as to think we have convinced ourselves that we are not that which we are, but in fact that which we are not. Ridiculous.

202. This is the current ‘extra-ordinary’ experience of many (simply because it is not experimented by the majority), however it is in fact the most ‘ordinary’ and natural experience in the world.

203. Good call and great question Alexis – how limited we are in our way of seeing the world and truly responding to others until we have enough humility to see others point of view and change our set stance.
     “We’re only ever prepared to see what we want to see, rather than what’s actually there. Or is it that what’s actually there is dependent on what we’re prepared to see? Hmmm…”

     1. Yes, brilliant question. I am more aware of choosing to see the world through the filters of my hurts. I’ve become more able at feeling and so discerning when this is at play and it’s often very obvious. So often I used to not want to see the love reflected in others – I chose avoiding my hurts, the greatest being my not choosing love. No, I preferred blaming the world and remaining the facilitator of my own misery!

     2. Seeing with our eyes alone (one tool of sight) or seeing with our whole bodies (a multi dimensional approach – with a much more complete view!)

204. Burnout is extremely common in health care professionals and one of the classic signs of it is depersonalisation or dehumanisation, where basically the health professional stops caring for their patients as human beings and becomes cynical about their work. So supporting our health care professionals to take care of themselves first is key, so that they can truly care for others.

     1. Well explained Andrew, and then ‘cynical’ becomes cloaked or justified as being ‘clinical’.

        1. I like that Deanne – cynical becomes clinical and is deemed a normal part of being a health care professional. I have witnessed this first hand in many a hospital ward, clinic and staff room.

205. How much could we change the medical system by merely appreciating its people?

     1. A brilliant question, Felix, which gets a resounding ‘HUGELY’ as its answer.

206. Reading your lovely blog Jennifer I also realise and deeply appreciate how many truly caring people working in the health field I have had the pleasure to meet. And just recently I needed to call the police service, thinking I would get fobbed off, as my issue was not of huge importance,but was affecting me enough to feel I needed to get clarity what options I had to address this situation. The lady policewoman who answered the phone, on a busy Saturday night was so caring and supportive that I was rather stunned. She was really listening to me and explaining how I best proceed and how I could get their supportive services to assist me in this case. Her care and love was impossible to miss. How amazing what we all can bring to each other every day, in all and any life situation at all.

     1. Isn’t it interesting the thoughts we can have before we do something, such as your example Esther. It’s then even more interesting that we end up being surprised by the complete opposite to what we were thinking. This very same thing has happened to me on more occasions than I care to remember and proves to me that we receive nothing from thinking.

        1. Absolutely Jennifer. The images we receive through thoughts set us up to expect an outcome in life and live in a reality that is void of the beauty that is actually possible when we live from our body rather than the mind.

207. There is always time to express our appreciation to doctors and nurses. When we do they can suddenly let go of the intensity of the work load they carry and relax, you can almost feel the hardness built up from anxiety and stress melt, and then they take that with them into the rest of their appointments that day. It only takes a moment, but that moment becomes many moments for many people.

     1. This is very true Joan, I have experienced that in my nursing work. I have found that it is important to let the appreciation in as it can be easy to not really take note. It’s also important that we as health professionals come to the understanding that appreciation begins with ourselves and appreciating who we are and everything that we bring, moreso than the actions we undertake and skills we may have.

     2. Moments of appreciation arrest the push of doing and drop us back into our ‘human being-ness’ and relationship with each other. It is incredible to observe these moments and the impact and change they bring.

        1. Yes Matilda, in that moment they lighten the load of anxiety and stress and bring a flood of warmth from the heart, and then love is present and connection is made.

208. Observing the care that others offer is something I have often taken for granted amongst my family and cousins. I see my family taking care of elders to the smallest details, and and yet I have not stopped to truly appreciate what has been offered. This blog has just reminded to appreciate every moment.

     1. Coming from old hurts around not being treated with care and love, we can demand being treated this way, and instead of appreciating one choice to be loving, we live with an eagle eye for every gesture that isn’t loving and use this to confirm the hurt and misery we have chosen to carry.

209. Jennifer something else that your article has caused me to reflect on is how our beliefs directly influence what we are prepared to see. I have been aware of this in myself at work. If I have a certain idea about something then I tend to see whatever evidence supports my idea and the same with my colleagues, they seem to see things that support their way of thinking. It seems a rare occurrence for people to say ‘you know what, you’re actually right, I can see what you see’. We’re only ever prepared to see what we want to see, rather than what’s actually there. Or is it that what’s actually there is dependent on what we’re prepared to see? Hmmm…

     1. I would say Alexis that there is a difference between what we project on to a situation and perceive it to be (based on our own beliefs and ideals) and feeling energetically what the truth is. The former comes from our minds and the latter from our inner hearts.

210. Jennifer your sharing has caused me to reflect on my own beliefs around the medical profession. 30 years ago when I was studying to be a nurse I saw a woman given a critical diagnosis and then the curtains pulled around her bed and she was left by herself. I only spent 3 months on the medical ward and this experience seemed to sum up my feeling that the nurses didn’t have enough time to actually be with people. What I have just realised is that I have not re-visited my belief about the medical profession since, I have simply carried my very stuck view around with me from year to year. I am grateful that through your sharing I have unhinged my stuck belief somewhat and am ready to feel anew.

     1. You make a good point here Alexis that often we have one experience in life either positive or negative and then set our beliefs about that type of experience at a certain point which we recall every time a similar experience or situation arises. We get stuck with a certain view or opinion about something. I know I have done this many times. However it has been my experience that things change all the time and it has been far wiser for me to learn to feel and discern the energy of any and every moment as it comes rather than rely on a recalled memory or event.

     2. It’s fascinating how such a small observation and short experience can influence our views on something for years… With the negative press on the medical profession and the NHS in the UK I have no doubt that many share a negative view and perception of it. This may be similar in other countries too?

     3. That’s great Alexis. It’s amazing how we can form a firm judgment on the whole of something because of the actions of one or two. All beliefs we have are definitely worth re-visiting and re-questioning, even if we come to the same conclusion.

     4. The more I read blogs like this and others on this site, I feel how much the patients have to offer in reflecting back to the professionals about the importance of relationship, connection and presence. We can all become lost in the systems of working, adhering to ‘good practice’ et al, but without that relationship with each other, bodies may recover, but what of the beingness that lives within?

211. Those moments that we have simply observing the very ordinary, can be very beautiful and confirming of what is our true nature – and of course, what is not.

     1. Absolutely Rosanne, observing those very ordinary moments reminds us of our true nature. The problem often is that we don’t take the time to observe these moments, as we are so caught up in the doing and rushing around, forgetting to appreciate life around us.

        1. All of the above confirming that beauty is in the ordinary and everyday. Whatever we look out at and the way we do so reflects how we are back to us. That in itself is beautiful no matter where we are at. So much here to appreciate. Loving the appreciation and beauty in these comments also.

     2. And our ability to observe comes from the relationship we have with ourself, with no need to ‘see’ life in a certain way, but simply as it is.

212. The lens with which we view the world determines the quality of our experiences.

     1. Kate this is a powerful and wise quote. It needs to be broadcast down the Internet and through the press!

     2. Beautifully expressed Kate and oh so true!

     3. Yes – simple. The choice of lens is ours.

     4. Beautifully said Kate. We can also continue to adjust our lens so that what we see and feel becomes much clearer.

        1. Perhaps even to see and feel things as they are, with completely clear sight.

     5. Gorgeous sharing Kate, our world is a reflection which reflects how we’re living and the relationship we have with ourselves.

     6. How true that is Kate, we choose what we see.

     7. I love what you have written here katechorley. The lens can often mask what we are not willing to see.

213. I too have begun to witness the love that people express, whereas years ago I would have been oblivious to it as you were. I definitely attribute it to changing my relationship with myself, being open to evolution and therefore my entire perspective of the world transformed.

     1. It is easy to only focus or see the lack of love in the world but it is important to really stop and appreciate how much love there is in the world also.

        1. I agree Andrew, when we live that love ourselves it is much easier to see all the love that is actually there in others.

        2. I agree Andrew and Kate, only yesterday in a shopping centre in the space of what seemed moments I saw a little girl hand in hand with her mum walking and looking adoringly at her mum whilst the little girl was talking to her; a little boy stopped from running across a busy road – playfully; 2 men greeting each other as only old friends can do, and the shop keeper where I was holding some of my shopping so I didn’t have to carry too many bags. Beautiful moments are really everywhere if we see them.

        3. Absolutely Andrew. There’s Love everywhere as well as there’s the not-love everywhere. It’s up to us to see what we a) want to see and b) to which of the two we want to contribute, pay attention to, give energy and c) are we doing so in an observing and loving way or in an absorbing, sentimental and / or judgemental way? Personally I’m learning to let Joy be part of my everyday life once again. There’s Joy in everything. Writing this comment and pondering on the subject of appreciation, how it works for me and to feel all other people’s comments is in itself a wonderful and joyful thing to be with and to do.

     2. I know that when I am feeling hard on myself and only focusing on the things I can do better in, I do view the world in a more judgemental way – only seeing the problems and issues. When I take the time every day to connect to my body and deeply appreciate my own essence and stillness and the gorgeousness of that, it supports me to see the world in a much more balanced way – observing it all without judgement or critique.

        1. the science simply explained …

        2. What an inspiring way to show how we can all let go of judgement, thank you, Andrew

        3. So true Andrew, learning to connect to our inner stillness, appreciate and visit it often through the day, it affords us some space in the midst of the busyness and rush that enables us to observe and be curious about the world and all we meet, rather than instantly reacting and getting caught into the drama of it all.

        4. So well said Andrew. When we relate to the world from our essence it is such a magical place.

     3. I feel the same way Kate, as if my entire perspective and understanding of the world has shifted since I started to truly care for for myself and others.

     4. Reading your comment made me remember that yesterday I felt the appreciation for my parents that we always had dinner together as a family. I can’t recall any evening that one of them weren’t there. I’ve never allowed myself to feel (!!!) how much I enjoyed that. There’s Magic if I allow myself to feel and deeply appreciate. Such different relationships with both myself and others!

214. All people, in truth, have the ability to deeply love and honour each other, however, there are many people who, for numerous reasons are not choosing this. Appreciating moments where we do see this caring and honouring is important because it confirms the truth of who people really are and their natural way of expressing together.

     1. Agreed Kate. There are very few people who would choose to not be their caring self, however, unfortunately get caught up in a world that values performance over quality.
        By appreciating that this is our true nature, we are able to build a deeper trust and surrender with all people and not be in protection in those moments when we are not met with the love and care we know we all deserve.

        1. Kylie I agree. It is the act of surrender that disarms the protection that holds us apart from others, and thus we feel our connection with all humanity. Such joy is felt in those moments.

     2. Absolutely Kate. I recently spent some time with my relatives and cousins and was quite shocked at the way they treated one another – calling each other names, swearing, yelling, getting frustrated and being quite abusive with one another, but it occurred to me that because they were all confirming to each other that this way of being was okay and acceptable (the parents doing the same thing too), they weren’t aware that there was a different and much more respectful way to behave around family. Thus I had the responsibility to show them this, and could not judge them for the way they lived as they had not been given a choice previously to do any different.

     3. I agree Kate, appreciating these moments confirms the love and care we see in ourselves and others. This acknowlegement creates a ripple in the Universe giving others the opportunity to be more too.

     4. I agree Kate, appreciating these little things we see during our day and making that our norm would go a long way to changing our lives personally and how we are with each other.

     5. So true Kate – I love how you have expressed this. Oftentimes it seems to me that when those folk who choose to not be honouring their innateness could be hiding a sensitivity or perhaps there could be a belief that they are not able to accept, or possibly there could be a sadness or deep hurt that is begging to be addressed. I find it to be quite a beautiful moment and experience when I witness unexpectedly the natural exchange of a caring and loving gentility between people. One has to wonder why would such an event be seemingly exceptional and not of the norm in some arenas of our world, country, town, school, home etc.

     6. Yes, important point katemaroney1 – in the appreciation there is confirmation and expansion of the moment. To me the appreciation is as crucial as the act itself.

215. When we stop and observe what is going on around us it is lovely (and sometimes not!). There have been many moments where I have seen acts of kindness or love between people. I did this the other day, I was driving down a road that was really long towards the town centre, and saw an elderly frail lady very slowly walking down the road to town with a battered old trolley. I drove passed her wondering about her life and then thought: Why did I drive past her?! So turned round and drove back to offer her a lift to the town centre. She accepted. It felt good to support another.

     1. Where do these moments of unsolicited support come from? That never end or require any requisition. They are from our heart and the love we have for everyone.

     2. How cool to be as connected as to be able to stop at any moment, be alert of what’s going on and adjust your movement according to what is needed.

     3. I enjoyed reading your story about helping the old lady Vicky and it reminded me of this elderly lady holding onto a lamp post because it was so windy, and this guy came along and helped her down the street. It’s lovely to see that these little moments do happen between people, who do not know each other.

     4. Lovely to feel Vicky how this gesture came from your beautiful big heart and not because it was the right thing to do.

        1. Beautifully said Simon V, I totally agree.

     5. A beautiful experience shared here Vicky, I love that. Very inspiring and I like the fact that you went back to her.

     6. Vicky a beautiful reflection of self responsibility and love. We can sit back and observe what is going on, tut tut about all the injustices in the world, or we can roll up our sleeves and do whatever we can to support another in every small way.

     7. Helping another when impulsed by the heart is the most rewarding experience ever. It can be in the form of an offer of practical help, a smile or silent steady presence … it feeds our soul like nothing else.

     8. Vicky – what a lovely gesture of assistance given to the frail lady.
        When we are openhearted and supportive of others, this too will come our way in return. I feel it is important to read the situation and offer help when needed.

     9. Vicky this is beautiful and very natural and it’s such a great way to support others, and yet it can be easy to go past and say it’s not up to us, but in fact we’re the ones who change things, all of us – so thank you for sharing this.

216. This is so true, I feel like the care and compassion has to be there for a doctors to commit to the absolute large study required to become a doctor. At some level we all have this care for people! I love what you’re sharing here Jen.

     1. I agree Natasha and often I find people forget or do not appreciate how passionate they are about their role and so the purpose goes and they are left with the feeling of ‘why am I doing this’

        1. True Amina, I also find that people often forget what inspired them to the roles they have chosen to contribute with in life. It is lovely when we take the moment to appreciate others and remind and confirm how precious and valuable each of us is, not just by what we do, but by what we bring to what we do. It is wonderful reading about Jennifer appreciating the caring nature of the doctors.

        2. Very true Amina – health care professionals show great dedication in both being able to complete what is often arduous training and continuing to work in challenging circumstances within struggling health care systems.

217. It’s true, Jennifer, life is full of those moments worth appreciating. I had given up on humanity and thought we were a bunch of cruel corrupted beings, tried to escape life. But once I truly looked I found lots of love at the core that’s worth to appreciate and thus deepen and expand.

     1. such a beautiful comment Felix. I can relate to all that you write. Appreciation is truly magical.

218. My experience of doctors generally has been very good, and I have indeed felt cared for. It is great to hear that this if the experience of many others as well as all too often, we are quick to blame and complain.

219. What I love about this blog is the value of appreciation. That you observed and appreciated this conversation, and built the appreciation to share with us an insider’s view of the world of medicine.

220. I also love what you shared when you said… ‘that we are all genuinely caring and this is our true nature, but sometimes for whatever reason we don’t allow ourselves to show this.’ Understanding this about ourselves and ALL others is a revelation that will be transformative for most of us as a society.

221. Furthermore, it shows that there are those within the medical system who despite how overworked and stressed most are, can still make it about the patient. That is worth appreciating for sure.

     1. Agreed Jenny our health care professionals could use some well deserved support. Their jobs are not easy, especially with others demanding that they make them feel better. This is a lot of pressure, and expressing appreciation towards them can go a long way towards supporting those in a very stressed and over stretched system.

222. Thanks Jen, your insight is actually very significant. We do have beliefs around the way the medical profession are with patients and while there’s no question it is true for some, it is by no means representative of all. I have come across more deeply caring professionals in the field than I have uncaring ones.

223. As I write this I am sitting in hospital by the bedside of an elderly family member. What has struck me since being here and observing the care he has been receiving is the level of dedication of the medical team to their patients, but the healthcare system in the UK is set up so that same level of care and dedication is difficult to give to themselves unless they have the awareness and commitment to put themselves first. The Nurses and Healthcare Assistants work 12 hour shifts, many with virtually no break as the wards are so short-staffed, and often staying late to ensure they give a full handover to the next team. I see them holding off drinking, eating, peeing – all basics self-care needs, so they can be there for the patients. Many are exhausted and unwell themselves and yet still put the needs of others before their own. I’m not being critical here as I understand why this is the case. We need to change the way we perceive care in this world. It is not laudable to put the needs of others first – we all need to support each other to see that if we learn to put our own needs first, take care of ourselves first, that this is not selfish, it supports us to then truly care for others and to be strong enough to sustain this as opposed to the self-sacrificial way caring is so often perceived which them leads to burnout and illness.

224. I agree we are at our heart naturally caring people, however until we can truly and deeply care for ourselves, we might want to care for others but in truth we cannot.

225. Great that you allowed the space to notice and observe the interaction between these two doctors and the confirmation that deep down, no matter how rushed or distracted we might at times be, we are deeply caring and committed.

226. Jennifer you have said a huge amount in only a few lines ‘As I ponder on why I am observing this now and not so much before, I can only put it down to how I treat and care for myself. The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others’. We can only see outside of us what we first see inside of us, and so it makes what we see inside of us so incredibly important, as it is this that colours our world.

227. In the hospital environment it is easy to forget that doctors and nurses have their personal lives too, where perhaps there are the regular challenges and struggles of family life, financial concerns, personal aspirations etc. that can affect their working day, just like anyone else. So, like anyone else, when they are able leave their problems at the door and give full and complete dedication to their day the results are tremendous.

228. We never know who is watching us. It is worth taking the time to always care about the way we interact. Not just for ourselves and the person we are talking to, but also with the knowing that others will see and feel how we interact. The ripple effect is profound.

229. Health Care staff also could take much more responsibility about how they take care of themselves outside work so that when they are at work they are able to offer a level of care that is completely respectful of all their patients and colleagues. There are a lot of great moments in our health care centres and hospitals but we need to raise the bar in terms of consistency and depth of care and love and respect that we offer each other.

     1. Andrew although I agree with you that ‘Health Care staff also could take much more responsibility about how they take care of themselves outside work so that when they are at work they are able to offer a level of care that is completely respectful of all their patients and colleagues’, I am actually coming to feel that the responsibility to care for ourselves is equal within us all. When my butcher cuts my meat then the quality that he cuts the food that I am going to eat will be affected by the energetic quality that he’s in, when my hairdresser cuts my hair, if he has a hangover or has had a row with his girlfriend then that goes into my haircut. That said it’s not only the people who directly touch us or our food or the products that we use that need to be responsible, we all do because we are all affecting everyone constantly because we are all one interconnected whole.

230. I know as a health care professional who has worked in the public and private sectors it is easy to become jaded and even cynical when faced with the enormity of illness and disease. There are enormous pressures placed on health care staff by patients to fix and cure conditions without them taking any active responsibility for what kind of body they are bringing to the consultation. I am not being judgmental or critical here as we could all do this more, including health care professionals. It is just that we need to be honest about what is going on and start the conversation about this if anything is going to change.

231. If you are overwhelmed, stressed and exhausted it is very difficult to truly care and be compassionate with another. We need to keep exploring why we are allowing our health care professionals to end up in this state in the first place and is there a way we can support them more to support themselves.

232. I agree as a health care professional most of the people I have worked with including doctors have a deep love for people and humanity. The education system for doctors however is a crushing sausage machine that produces academically and perhaps practically gifted doctors but leaves the trainees exhausted before they even start work. There is very little about self care or looking after yourself in the training. This is where things need to change.

233. Beautiful example, that we only see what we allow ourselves to see. There is magic all around us and it’s our own images and beliefs that blind the eyes and shelter the heart.

234. From experience it has become obvious to me that until we deal with our age-old hurts and have no further need to be in self-protection, we will continue to keep ourselves hidden and unable to express our true divine nature.
     “One thing that I have come to understand is that we are all genuinely caring and this is our true nature, but sometimes for whatever reason we don’t allow ourselves to show this”.

235. Jennifer you have written an article that on first glance appears to be addressing just a couple of main points, but it’s not true; you have threaded such exquisite wisdom all the way through, so much so that I am actually a little lost as to what to comment on first!

236. So beautiful to be observing this Jen. It’s true, all too often appreciation can be a missing ingredient in health care iespeciallly when we get swept up in rush. Appreciation not only of each other as colleagues but also of ourselves for what we bring to the work and for who we are. Dedication, loving care and concern, support for another to heal, team work, true compassion, all such beautiful qualities deserving of much appreciation.

237. Beautiful, Jennifer, to feel your openness to appreciating these gestures of true care. When we observe each other and are not caught up in our own reactions, the space can open up for beautiful moments of grace like this.

238. As Rachel says earlier, when we may feel there has been a lack of care, can it be that it is a reflection for us to feel how we have had a lack of care for ourselves.
     It has been easy for me not to notice similar situations in the past, because I didn’t have that awareness within my life, but I see more episodes of care as you describe now Jen that are amazing observations to feel.

239. Doctors work in an extremely stressful environment. Not only do they need to deal with limited funding and long work hours, but equally the unrealistic expectations of patients who in many cases turn to medicine with a “fix me now” attitude, and have no willingness to reflect on their own part in their own health. Doctors are in many cases doing their very best, and it is about time as a society that we realised the true service they strive to provide, and understand how we can contribute to alleviating the incredible stress our medical system is under simply by taking greater care with the way we live.

240. “As I ponder on why I am observing this now and not so much before, I can only put it down to how I treat and care for myself. The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.”
     Yes Jennifer, as we become more loving and observant of our selves, we cannot but become more observant of the love around us, as it reflects back what we are living and expressing.

241. Jennifer, reading your blog was such a pleasure. I have experienced both ends of the scale with doctors and nurses, but have been blown away by the tenderness and care I have received sometimes. Despite the stress some practitioners show I can feel that underneath the is care there.

242. Yes a system can interfere with the way that people interact with each other, but it is important to recognise that the system doesn’t support and find a way to express. It is very simple, for when we speak truth and make it about people, it becomes a whole lot easier.

243. It is great to get another view of doctors, a more tender caring one than we sometimes see.
     We often pigeon hole people in different professions without taking into consideration the pressure and time frame they work under. It is true that the more we become aware of our own tenderness and love for humanity, the more we will see that reflected in others. Thank you Jennifer.

244. Having gone through a serious illness and spending a lot of time in hospitals several years ago, I was delighted by the absolute dedication and love that I felt by so many doctors and nurses. My experience offered me a deep appreciation for the amazing work and support that is offered (with no perfection) under hugely stressful conditions.

245. A beautiful sharing Jennifer and it feels awesome that you have taken the time to clock and deeply appreciate the level of care that is present amongst Health care practitioners.

246. Thank you Jennifer and its is very true, we are innately caring beings and I too have noticed that the more caring I am of myself, the more I recognise and appreciate this quality in other people. And when we really understand this, it supports us to know that if a person isn’t expressing their natural care, there must be a reason for it, it enables us to be compassionate towards one another.

247. “One thing that I have come to understand is that we are all genuinely caring and this is our true nature, but sometimes for whatever reason we don’t allow ourselves to show this”, is a great realisation as it opens the door to being considerate and compassionate of others, which then allows and supports them, and ourselves, to express our innate nature to be loving.

248. It’s great how you have widened your powers of observation and in this you are seeing a lot more care and love in the world.

249. What I love about this blog is that it is showing us the beauty of reflection and how if we are truly caring for ourselves the we will see this in others.

     1. Thank you Heidi for this pure Wisdom:

        “IT IS SHOWING US THE BEAUTY OF REFLECTION AND HOW IF WE ARE TRULY CARING FOR OURSELVES THEN WE WILL SEE THIS IN OTHERS”.

        This is revealing the Beauty of life that is all around us, in every single moment as well as the responsibility we hold to connect to ourselves as much as we can in order to be part of that reflection. How deeply, deeply Beautiful is this. We can be so deeply inspiring, just by living the Love that we are.

     2. Well, said Heidi, it’s hard to see what shines in another when have not allowed it to be seen in ourselves.

250. Jen what a beautiful piece of writing. I think we could all say we have experienced interactions with medical professionals that didn’t show the depth of care and dedication that they feel. This reminds us that underneath the rushing and overwhelm of workloads/time frames etc that these people are here because of how much they deeply care.

     1. I agree Vicky – it is very worth feeling this truth when we meet health care workers. It may just offer them a moment to re-connect to their own true purpose of why they chose to offer their loving service. Being with ourselves in our own vulnerability without defenses supports anther to drop theirs. Nothing seems to bring this to surface quicker than illness.

     2. Hello Vicky and I like where you are taking this. We could say in any moment bring the deep care we know we have to everyone and everything, including ourselves. So if we see “medical professionals that didn’t show the depth of care and dedication that they feel” then bring that care to them so they can feel it again. So often it would appear we react and walk away at times when we expect something to be a certain way and possibly instead we should be seeing this and then bringing what is needed for everyone. Everything is a relationship and how we are in these relationships is the key, don’t wait and watch for others to bring something we can see is needed.

     3. Yes Vicky, I agree with what you have said and appreciate the eloquence and grace with which you have expressed it.

        1. I am discovering that the more that I am willing to see the depth of care and love within someone, the more they are willing to share it. It’s like if I see it they then feel safe to share even more of the love they are. This is always so touching to experience.

251. Is it possible that the mistrust and experience of carelessness is a reflection of how we are with people and with ourselves? Being ill and having to be in hospital is for many people the result of a very uncaring life lived prior to this situation. We generally live in a very uncaring way and this is reflected in all our structures and relationships. So starting to be caring with ourselves and others is definitely a game changer.

     1. It’s an interesting thing to consider Rachel that when we perceive that someone (be it health professional or not) has not been caring towards us, that this is an invitation to ponder on how we in fact have been caring for ourselves and therefore an opportunity to take this to a deeper level. When we look at in this way, self-care expands greatly beyond what we do to the more intimate details of how we go about everything during our day.

     2. It is ironic that what can overwhelm medical staff is so like the blood that flows in our veins… always under pressure and never ending. You fight this pressure and lose yourself or you accept the flow and choose to be your self and just ride the flow.

     3. Absolutely Rachel. What we see is our own behaviour, patterns etc, being reflected back to us. The more we live that we care, the more this is what we bring to the world and becomes our experience of the world.

     4. Beautifully said Rachel.

252. I love your reflection Jennifer because what you show is how simple and easy it is to be caring and loving and how this can be felt by others.

     1. And how we can be easily inspired by others and how they are if we so choose.

253. The more we live the love we are, the more we see this love in others. Love never hides, we simply turn a blind eye to its beauty if love is what we are not choosing.

     1. This is so true, Liane. When we are observing the world with love in our hearts, we cannot deny that it is our true nature.

     2. Love this Liane and so so true. Whatever you live you are, so it’s well worth living something that is true and in that living the “love we are” there is no better place to be, for all of us.

     3. This is a profound point Liane. “Love never hides, we simply turn a blind eye to its beauty if love is what we are not choosing.” This also shows how one person can have a terrible experience and one a great one in the same circumstance, and also how Jennifer has found, as she has increasde the level of love and care in her own life, she has been observing more of it around her.

     4. How simple this is, and how gorgeous too.

     5. I agree Liane – we need to claim and live the love we are, to fully see it in all its tender and deeply touching glory.

     6. Beautifully said Liane, we do indeed turn a blind eye to love’s beauty when we are not choosing it for ourselves. Nothing takes the ‘shine’ off life and relationships faster than choosing not to be the love we are in our essence.

     7. Love never hides, yet we hide from it. An extraordinary statement, considering most would say all they want is love. We could then say that, love asks for something that perhaps we are not prepared to give. Being loved requires an openness and willingness to heal, if someone does not want to feel that which needs to be healed, they will hide from love, as it is love that exposes all that is not.

254. What strikes me here is that all too often we focus on what is wrong with a situation other than what is right. That is, we tend to look for and notice the negative at the expense of the positive, which in this case is that deep down we all are naturally caring and loving creatures and it is very normal and simple to express this. Thankyou Jennifer for taking the time to pause and observe this and share it with us.

     1. Absolutely agree Liane, we are all genuinely caring and when we ourselves express this it is reflected back to us. This is how life is really lived, as a reflection of how we are.

        1. Yes Rachel and when this is reflected to us, we then have the choice to deepen this with a conscious effort to appreciate what we bring.

     2. Hello Liane and we call this an ‘attitude’ problem and while this is partly true, the whole truth is this is a ‘living’ problem. In other words how we live with ourselves gauges what we see in any situation. I’m not saying be positive and everything will be positive, more live true to what you feel and life will reflect back to you your next step. So if you are one to “focus on what is wrong with a situation other than what is right” check how you speak to yourself in any moment. Do you replay events in your head that eventually lead to you being hopeless, bad, wrong etc. If this is the case this is ‘how you live with yourself’ and so this is what you will see in others. So when these thoughts come in, don’t just let them run wild for days, months or years. Have the thought but then dedicate back to what you are doing, the next moment. Whether you are walking, talking or doing nothing, it’s important to stay present in any moment you are actually in.

        1. “…live true to what you feel and life will reflect back to you your next step.”

           Very wise words Ray and great advice. Although this can at first seem difficult to do because we are so fixed on ‘getting there’, from A to B and having a set plan in how to do so, living true in each moment actually guarantees the quality of the final destination by virtue of the quality of steps taken to get there. In other words, it is not where we get to that matters as much as the way we get there. Steps walked in and with the love we are, will naturally lead us to more love and thus open more gates and more opportunities with a smoother path there. Initially trust is the key, to surrender to the body and override our propensity to think it all through first and from there, it becomes a knowing that how we walk governs the nature of the landscape we arrive in.

        2. This is it for me, Liane Mandalis and with each ‘arrival’ brings a new path forward to be walked in the same way. Each time unfolding a new level of love that seemed not possible from the first step, there is no end point. So if you are stopping for a break or pushing everything to a destination or have a final destination in mind, again all this keeps us from the step or detracts from the quality of the step.

           I understand that at first every step may “seem difficult to do” and this is due to a momentum of “getting there”. At this point if we bring a deeper awareness to the quality of the step and realise anything else is a distraction away from this very thing and dedicate deeper again to always putting our foot firmly on the ground. Build a momentum of this and when it ‘seems difficult’ you won’t get lost in the difficulty, you will go simply to the quality of your step and watch the world change before your eyes. Again have a picture, or take a step and rest waiting to see the change, and you have lost your step; step carefully and deeply with all that you are and never wait.

     3. Liane, having read this article I felt the same, ‘all too often we focus on what is wrong with a situation other than what is right’, after reading this article I noticed that I can be quite critical of people and situations and realised that I was missing out on seeing and enjoying the positive things; the caring and the joy that was there, and that seeing and appreciating these things makes me feel much lighter and more joy full.

     4. The hurts of our past that we hold onto colour our view of the world. It is almost as if we have a radar looking for things to confirm that people are cruel and cannot be trusted, which then confirms our stance to shut people out. In my experience this simply does not work, it created a self-imposed prison which I then went to the ends of the earth to try and get out of! Thank God for my choice to return to the love that I am, and now see people in a very different light, one that is true.

     5. Exactly Marika. We make mountains out of molehills to mask the truth of our magnificence. We are love first before we are anything else. Seeing and confirming this will help all that is not this, fade away so it can no longer be the self imposed roadblock on our path back home to our true glory.

255. Jennifer, it a great reminder for us to stop and observe what is going on around us, as there is beauty happening around us all the time. It’s so easy to get caught in the self and the we miss everything. When we see life is about everyone, we are able to observe the beauty around us. We are often reflected the behaviours we have added to our rhythm. If we have loving caring rhythms we will see these in ours lives.

     1. True observation builds closeness and intimacy and is a most beautiful way to contribute to others and the quality of their life.

256. “The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others”.
     This is lovely to experience Jennifer. Once choosing to be more consciously present with our body and the quality of moving it – whether being gentle or tender in touching our skin, opening door handles or wiping down the kitchen surface, this changes our level of self care and thus able to be seen more easily in others.

257. Jennifer I love reading this. As I’m starting to be less self-absorbed and more observant I’m seeing so much more care in the world around me. I’m realising I can trust people and am loving all the caring expressions I see in my day. It’s been so habitual to only look for the exceptions where someone is having a bad day/life and isn’t handling it well and using that to colour my whole outlook on life and the world. I am often blown away by the genuine care people show one another that has no ulterior motive other than express the natural care we have for one another.

     1. It’s fascinating how little of the world around us we observe and feel when we are absorbed in our own issues and complications.

        1. Well said Susie and shows just how much we miss out on when we make life about ourselves.

258. I love the way you have expressed that the more love and care you offer yourself, the more you can see the same expressed in others. I have recently been noticing the impact of taking a moment to appreciate another – on both myself and the other person. I have noticed that most people respond, they relax their chest and breathing, soften their shoulders, and become more open in their face – even when it has been on the tube with strangers and I have not even said a word and even if they are not looking at me.

     1. So true Golnaz, appreciating people breaks the momentum and drive, if only for a moment and reminds us that we are beautiful and worthwhile beings. It is amazing to see how our bodies respond and open up, it has an incredible effect on our health.

     2. Everybody feels – deeply. We can sense when another is judging us even though not one word has been spoken. To be open and accepting of others allows others to just be and to be just where they are at. That is love.

     3. Wow Golnaz, that is powerful and worth exploring further. Thank you.

259. ‘As I ponder on why I am observing this now and not so much before, I can only put it down to how I treat and care for myself. The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.’ This is true Jennifer. It gives us the space to truly appreciate.

260. It is beautiful to observe the magic of God when observing other people. Sometimes we are too busy and miss out on these magic moments

     1. Absolutely Anne, it is incredible when we are connected and walking with us to see how much magic there is around us, then stop and realise that that magic is there all along, we have just not chosen to see it.

     2. You are so right Anne, those magic moments are forever around us. The faster we live, the less we see and feel, till these moments appear to vanish in the blur.

     3. Yes Anne, even to understand these moments are ‘the magic of God’ is a revelation for many… bringing God into our everyday is so important, and being able to feel this through moments like Jennifer has described is deeply touching.

261. Jennifer thank you for sharing this beautiful moment with us. Behind all the rush and busyness of our lives the caring natural of others still exists and it’s so important to appreciate this in each other when we observe it.

     1. I work as a support worker and carer, and truly appreciate the genuine caring that I see expressed by my fellow workers….the gentleness and concern as well as the playfulness I see shown to clients by some of my co-workers is very touching….observing this deepens my love and appreciation of others.

        1. I agree rosemaryliebe, that’s so beautiful to see, that it’s happening in many areas of professional life; I work in finance and I’m always touched by how caring the finance consultants talk about our clients and their needs, and deeply considering how our services can support them the best in where they are at and where they want to go.

        2. Yes Esther it is deeply touching and inspiring to feel and see the genuine care, consideration and support that many professionals extend/express to their clients.

     2. I agree Kathryn. Jennifer has also offered a beautiful stop moment for us to consider what is being reflected to us in our lives.

     3. Love is our innate and natural way of being and appreciation deepens our connection to and with our love.

     4. That’s the amazing detail of this blog – Jennifer could observe this moment in an immensely rushed environment. It shows how strong the natural ability and joy to care is deeply ingrained in all of us.

        1. Agreed Felix and shows just how deeply touched we are when we see someone caring for another. Confirming that at the core of each of us is a deep love and care for each other.

     5. The love and caring nature of human beings never goes away, as it is who we are, so appreciating the many moments that this shines through is a beautiful acknowledgement of what is true.

262. When we judge people or build beliefs around bad past experiences it’s like putting coloured glasses on and not allowing ourself to see what is actually happening around us in the present. Thanks Jennifer for sharing your experience here, I know I’ve opened up to people more too through the support of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine.

     1. I agree Fiona, and then this becomes a dangerous game that is played without realising it, tit for tat sort of thing, which does not support in seeing the true essence of the person.

        1. We’re indeed playing a game here on earth. Every time we judge or compare we’re actually adding separation to ourselves and so to the people and life around us. For most of my life I’ve tried to hide the fact that I judge(d) and compare(d). I can’t deny now anymore if I do so – due to the fact that I’ve built a far more loving relationship with my body which in turn shows me clearly if I judge or compare. I still may choose to deny what I feel at times, but I’ve also learnt and experienced that in those moments, I can deny and bury what I feel – or I can make a different choice (!!!!!!) and drop into my heart and choose appreciating. It’s lovely to (slowly) end the war inside and re-connect to the loving relationship with myself.

     2. This is so true Fiona. I am constantly reminded that it is sooo important to be willing to let things go. Yes let’s say what hurt, but not hold onto it as this really does stop relationships from developing, and holding onto hurts and bad experiences can lead to illness and disease.

263. Stopping and appreciating the value and the gift in these moments helps me to understand the responsibility I have when interacting with people and that the things i do can and do make a difference.

     1. Yes, it is a great reflection to inspire us to be all that we are.

     2. Most things we buy today are 2x, 3x, extra concentrated and more value for your money. The magic moments of observing and participating in these moments of connection from the heart with others will always be priceless and precious.

     3. Same for me Nicole, I also feel the responsibility this brings with every interaction I have. When we bring in the appreciation, I cannot but wake in the morning and look forward to all those people I am going to meet that day.

264. Just with everything and everybody in life, this blog shows the importance of appreciation and how much this is needed. We have to look beyond the faults, mistakes and moments, and see people who they truly are and what they bring. I feel that this is very much needed in hospitals. Behind every white coat is a beautiful person.

     1. I agree Mariette – it’s beautiful to take a moment and appreciate the amazing service we receive as patients.

     2. Yes appreciation, that is what also came to my mind when reading this blog. It is when we start to appreciate ourselves there comes an openness to appreciating others and these beautiful moments. It is through this appreciation that the world can change, by appreciating what is true life starts to become full again.

        1. Agreed Lieke, appreciation plays a huge role in how we feel towards ourselves and others. We have so many pictures of how life should look that we do not stop enough to take stock and appreciate what we do have. Pictures of how life should be always leave us asking for more, whereas appreciation leaves us knowing we are more.

     3. It’s a real win win isn’t it Mariette, the more we appreciate others the greater our view of the world. I always feel more settled in my body when I am able to see the qualities in others, it is a very affirming and enjoyable way to live.

     4. Gorgeously put Mariette, seeing beyond any actions or mistakes to who the person truly is, and see the love and care each of us brings. There is such a joy to understanding and seeing life in this way, and as Jennifer shows here, you begin to ‘see’ more than just those everyday tasks.

265. Doctors have a general reputation for treating the disease first, patient second, and maybe that is just our twisted view, and we need to feel Doctors first, see their actions second. Same with everyone – it’s easy to be critical of our colleagues’ actions and blind ourselves to their deeper essence and what they truly bring.

     1. Yes Carmel, it seems so easy to fault someone and find their flaws, but how much ease do we take to appreciate what they bring and honour them in their unique expression and ways?

     2. A fabulous point you make Carmel. We are holding doctors to a standard that most people, in fact, do not live by. In most jobs we would find people put the task at hand first and then consider that they are at least being polite, often the priority is to get the job done even if it is at the cost of another’s well-being. As a manager that has a number of jobs to delegate and be delivered, I can relate to these pressures and how easily we can all be caught by them. So yes, Carmel, let’s see doctors as people first too.

266. It is a tragedy if we stop perceiving the beauty and love of the world, just because the ugliness of a separative way has been introduced to it.

267. I have enjoyed reading your blog Jennifer – thank you!
     From personal experience of visiting our local hospital with a family member over the past year for appointments, scans and procedures, I absolutely agree with you that all the hospital staff are deeply dedicated and caring people in spite of being very overworked in a very stressful and demanding environment.

268. Deepening our relationship with ourselves, through self-care and self-nurturing offers the potential to alter how we engage with what is occurring around us. The more intimate and aware we are about how we feel and our own well-being I feel, the more we are able to feel the quality of what occurs around us. And so, as you say in this article, more appreciation and observation of the care and love that is present in the world can be felt.

269. Jennifer this is beautiful to read. It is so easy to see the faults, pick up on the flaws in the system. Even just reading your blog I can feel a tenderness, understanding and appreciation within me, yet know that I too chose not to see these moments. Thank you for highlighting this.

     1. Yes Jenny, I know this too that I can get totally critical and pick everything apart at times, but how does that serve anyone? And I too appreciate the inspiration that Jennifer offers us with her sharing.

270. What I have observed and appreciate from reading this article is how often we can miss the care and love that is shared by others because we haven’t been observing what is going on around us. The way some one looks at another, the tone their voice, a gentle touch, all of these are small moments that can be missed if we are caught up in our own thoughts and agendas. Lack of observation can leave us feeling lacking and like we are missing something, which is true, we are not appreciating life as much as we might. Observation offers a deeper knowing, understanding and appreciation of ourselves and others.

     1. Yes, davidsonsamantha – when we observe without judgement or critique everything is to be seen there from the essence of all. “Observation offers a deeper knowing, understanding and appreciation of ourselves and others”.

     2. This is a great point you are making here Samantha, we walk around so blinded by our own concerns that we lose the capacity to observe what is going on around us.

271. Thank you Jen and Elizabeth, I agree, the more we appreciate how loving we are the more we see the love and caring that is in others.

272. Elizabeth this is an awesome reflection ‘The fact that you can now see the beauty in simple everyday interactions is gorgeous and makes life so much more joyful.’

     1. Well said Kehinde

273. Jennifer, I love this article, since reading it i have been noticing how much people do naturally care even if it is not so obvious, I can feel how this is our natural way to be, I have noticed this with children at my local school, a little boy got left behind when the line of children went off to class and a girl from his class came back, held his hand and walked back in with him; a young boy wanted to play with some french elastic, I saw a group of much older girls playing with it and went to ask if the boy could join in and they said yes and lovingly showed the young boy how to play. It is beautiful to notice and appreciate these moments of care and love between people.

     1. I love how you have shared these moments Rebecca. They come in big and small ways.
        At the traffic lights in the city the crowd of people crossing was huge and there stood a blind person struggling to cross. I watched this girl come out from nowhere, boldly walk up to the man and usher him gently across the road. Classic hey? This simple gesture warmed my heart because it reminded me that we all feel like supporting others when we are open, confident and connected.

274. What an awesome blog Jennifer, I love how you say the more loving, tender and caring you are with yourself the more you see this in others. It is so true and something that is super simple yet in the rush of life we can often forget about the importance of caring and looking after ourselves. How we care for ourselves directly impacts the way we then see life.

275. How many people start their day and have no need of coffee? That are ready, willing and looking forward to the day and what it brings? Everyone has this as a choice. When we care for ourselves as you have said Elizabeth life becomes simple.

276. Such a sweet simple thing to do that sweetens up my day: appreciation. On a day on which I appreciate myself and others I actually feel less hungry for sugar.

     1. Agreed felixschumacher8 – deepening appreciation for oneself and thus for others is a key for our true wellbeing and simply gorgeous to bring into practice more and more.

     2. Yes Felix, I have noticed that I need no ‘fillers’ when I fill my day with love and appreciation.

277. It’s Awesome how Universal Medicine helps to lift the veil of illusion we have been so blinded by that we can now truly see and appreciate moments around us without making assumptions. It is also great to see all that is not working in the world as well instead of wanting to check out or bury my head in the sand. However, there is still so much more to feel and be aware of.

     1. There’s so much more to be aware of and at the same time I’m already so much more aware then ever before. So appreciation and commitment to constant evolvement are key here. It is so lovely to feel how the people that I meet do more and more respond to the love that is shared.

        Last week I had an open sharing about Chakra-puncture and she could very well hear it. To me this is remarkable and I felt that indeed the two forms of medicine will one day unite. Maybe even sooner than I could have ever thought about.

278. What if beauty is ordinary? What if magic is usual? What if the magnificence we’ve all dreamed of, already exists in life, but we can’t see it simply because of how we choose to live? It’s like we live in paradise yet the way we choose to be, means we see ‘everyday hell’ as our reality. This ‘hell’ is not true at all, but just the end result of our lack of appreciation and connection. Thank you Jennifer for being one who is here, reversing the trend, and with such tenderness.

279. We should all take the time and appreciate whatever we see going on around us and not judge if it is not so caring, doctors may get a bum wrap sometimes but I can only imagine what the stress and work load must be like in some cases. My personal experience with doctors over the years with various broken bones and a couple of operations is one of admiration, the care I was shown was superb, the after care sometimes may not have been the best but that may relate to the lack of care I had for myself at the time.

280. It’s amazing how much responsibility we each have in this world on a minute to minute basis. Our every move has ripple effects.

281. I recall being cynical about the medical profession, albeit mainly with regard to the GPs I’d encountered. Some of what irked me had merit, but a good deal of it did not and was a direct reflection of my own lack of self-care. I’m pretty sure though I wouldn’t have been able to fault them on their dedication to people.

282. I can really relate to what you’ve shared jennifer. I have a couple of difficult colleagues who in the past would have probably broken me, but these days I choose to see past what they present and know that underneath the facade lies gentle people. This is by no means always easy to see, but with the continued practice in taking care of myself and understanding how I am, I am able to remind myself of this when I’m feeling overwhelmed by certain behaviours.

283. What a beautiful observation Jennifer, first of yourself and then of the doctors and patient scenario. It really is amazing what our eyes begin to see/notice when we genuinly start to make loving choices for ourselves.

284. Jennifer this is a very humble blog. Very often pride can get in the way and so we actually want and chose to hold onto certain beliefs about people when they have long moved on or what we experienced was a momentary behaviour. I feel that there’s a lot that I can learn from your sharing. Thank you.

285. I recently had a family member admitted to intensive care after emergency surgery and I was so impressed with the care that the nurses gave not only to their patients but also the families. It is sometimes easy to look at doctors or nurses and say that they must have numbed themselves to the suffering they encounter every day, and I’m sure that many do. But these are people who like so many of us, care deeply for people. So much so that they have dedicated their lives to them. This is a great blog, thank you.

286. This is very beautiful Jennifer, ‘One thing that I have come to understand is that we are all genuinely caring and this is our true nature, but sometimes for whatever reason we don’t allow ourselves to show this.’ Reading this I can feel how true this is that people are genuinely caring by nature, I have observed this when I have been with my son since he was a baby, people genuinely want to help and you can see people that may have appeared hard on the surface melt when they see babies and little children. Or I have observed that someone may not look very friendly and caring but if i approach people for help then you see how caring and helpful they truly are.

287. I agree Jennifer with the support of Universal Medicine my eyes, my heart have been opened to a much bigger picture of life instead of being held in old beliefs that would fog my view and opinions of others.

288. We often approach the medical profession with an expectation that they will fix us. That expectation already puts our relationship under enormous pressure. Yes, its their job and they have been trained to do the best they can to get us better, but how we are with them, our fellow human beings after all, will significantly impact how they are with us.

289. I can draw a similar parallel with what you say here and what I see in the nonprofit sector, albeit in a slightly different way. Although much of what takes place in the sector has nothing to do with love and a lot to do with self, at the heart of much of it is the impetus to care and or support humanity. The thing is, there can be no true care or love for others if we have not developed it for ourselves first. If we haven’t developed self-care and self-love, we’re coming from ideals rather than a lived understanding.

290. Appreciation of all that is there and a willingness to see all there is allows us to open our horizon so to speak, letting us see that there is so much more to life than we could ever imagine.

291. We all deeply care but often do not show it and or have adapted behaviours that seemingly negate this deep caring, but as it so strongly comes out in your observation Jennifer, we do care, deeply so and more than we want to admit.

292. A beautiful blog sharing the real caring and love we all are, and the more we feel this for ourselves the more we can appreciate it in others. We are all beautiful caring beings and it’s only our hurts and protections that make us act and not feel this, and these are simply our choices in how we choose to live.

293. Jennifer, you are living proof that if we learn to care for ourselves first then we will be able to care for others in a whole other way. The fact that you can now see the beauty is simple everyday interactions is gorgeous and makes life so much more joyful.

     1. So true Elizabeth, ‘The fact that you can now see the beauty in simple everyday interactions is gorgeous and makes life so much more joyful.’ I feel very inspired to appreciate these everyday interactions, I can feel how often we notice the things that don’t feel great and don’t notice/appreciate the simple, loving interactions between people.

     2. Yup, the self fulfilling cycle of seeing the aspects of life that we deem most important, means we can choose to connect to the hurt, harm, stress or to the care, quality and sensitivity in us all.

     3. Yes Elizabeth and Jennifer, it is a True Joy everytime we’re connected to the Beauty, Warmth and Care in which a lot of people do their job. It is only when we let go of ideals and beliefs and (start) letting other people in, that we are to re-connect to the appreciation of other people. Simply because we’re appreciative about ourselves first. Witnessing and appreciating and even expressing the gift we’ve been reflected is deeply Powerful and Connecting.

     4. There is nothing so powerful as someone’s lived experience, and in this seemingly ordinary moment that Jennifer observed she received such a wonderful realisation that will no doubt change not only her life, but also the lives of others who she has shared this with. It has certainly got me to stop and observe more deeply what is going on around me.

     5. This is true Elizabeth. Nursing is not easy work, so this is a sure fire way to return joy to nursing.

294. A great sharing Jennifer. Over the years as a Patient I have come across a few Doctors who have poor bedside manner, but again, to judge them when I don’t know what their day has been like really isn’t fair, so I take your point and realise that they would not be in a caring profession if they weren’t at heart caring themselves. It is also our own responsibility to be love too as others have mentioned.

     1. So true Roslyn. It can definitely be hard at times to accept that we really don’t know what is going on for the other person, particuarly when we are feeling vulnerable. But the magic of being able to detach ourselves from our expectation of how another should be with us leave us with how we are with ourselves, which means we then have the choice to not take another persons behaviour personally.

295. I wonder if different hospitals have different cultures? I visited my Mum in hospital on the weekend and was taken aback to see a sign on the reception desk reminding the nurses they were there to care for their patients! Surely this is nursing 101 if not the point of nursing altogether? Over 2 half days in the hospital I could see why they needed the sign – there wasn’t much interaction with the patients, it was quite perfunctory and there was a lot of loud talking by staff outside patient rooms. It’s great to hear not all hospitals are like this.

     1. Having said that, I love what you present here Jennifer. I have found it to be true if I’m not open to something or someone it’s because I’m holding on to a belief, ideal, expectation or judgement. Doing so clouds what I see.

     2. Reading your comment here is not surprising to me at all Victoria. I have worked as a registered nurse in many hospitals and have see the system become very robotic and disconnected. For there to be that sign there must mean that someone has recognised this, and is attempting to make some changes, albeit a sign to remind nurses to care.

     3. Wow that’s pretty shocking Victoria. What I know about signs in hospitals is that they are often ignored or not seen, even if it’s right in front of your eyes.

        1. I had the sense that might be the case Jennifer in this situation. The staff seemed involved in a lot of extraneous activity that seemed self rather than patient-focused – sort of oblivious and caught up in internal goings-ons. Of course hospitals are not the only workplaces where this occurs but it’s one where you’d hope it least happens. We have a long way to go.

296. A beautiful blog sharing the real caring and love we all are and the more we feel this for ourselves the more we can appreciate it in others. We are all beautiful caring beings and it is only our hurts and protections that make us act and not feel this and are simply our choices in how we choose to live.

297. As we only see what we want to see or are open to see it indeed tells something about oneself. Most of us are very keen to see the things that disturb, irritate or even hurt us, thereby continously find ourselves in the same patterns of reaction to life and people. The moment we clock ourselves seeing something outside of our routine or pattern shows that something has changed in us and in your case as you say you have let go of beliefs that blinded you and developed a level of care for yourself so that you are now open to see the same quality in others. Quite amazing how life changes when we start to change and thus our view of life.

298. Imagine how much the expressed level of care will increase just by observing and appreciating it. Appreciation is the wind under our wings; it literally lifts us up and supports us spreading our wings.

299. Super inspiring blog! For a long time I held a mistrust of doctors and largely resisted (& avoided!) the medical system. As I have begun to develop care and love for myself this has changed for me in many ways and I now really appreciate my own personal relationship with my doctor as well as those I have been in contact with when I’ve needed additional support.

300. I see and appreciate more and more the love and care that people bring to their work, and how we all contribute our part to the whole, what ever that part may be its no less than any other part, because that part makes up the whole.

     1. This is important Thomas and is a way of staying connected with what is going on around us and appreciating the whole. Each day we are given glimpses of the the true beauty that is forever present.

301. Our fears and strongly held negative beliefs and pictures of the medical system and the people in it, can cloud our perceptions and in fact we can create a negative experience for ourselves. The opposite is also possible when we are open to meet receive the doctors and Nurses as genuinely caring people who truly love to care, and allow ourselves to surrender and receive that care.

302. “As I ponder on why I am observing this now and not so much before, I can only put it down to how I treat and care for myself. The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.” I experience this too Jennifer, the more I take care of myself and am more open and less protected in my interactions with others the more I observe the loving acts of others, all the time throughout my day.

303. “the bottom line is, we are in this business because we truly love to care.” This feels really important to state and claim Jennifer, as its very true I would say most of the time, I think that the huge work load placed upon people in the medical profession, often means they cant offer the level of support and care they would like to, but none the less it doesn’t change the fact that they love to care.

304. Jennifer, not having a preconceived picture of something opens us up to observing even more and seeing the truth as it is. How can we drop the unending pictures that we carry, certainly that is not a head decision we can just say we will make a choice in doing, as we must have experienced how although saying we will, the pictures will still creep in. So it is how we treat and care for ourselves as you have shared,, how we move with ourselves and others in life, that allows this freedom and openness.

305. If we view humanities problems to be big and unachievable then that breeds the belief that things are just unchangeable, this then allows a “so whats the point anyway attitude” to creep in and with that, responsibility gets hung out to dry. Jens blog address these belief systems that we all carry and supports a way out, paved with love, care and appreciation for herself and others.

306. True Jennifer, caring is our natural way and just like you I work in this business because I love to care. It took some time to truly appreciate this fact and to acknowledge I love people and I am able to see the love and beauty in every client.

307. True Doug, when I rush it is all about me and time, it has nothing to do with people let alone caring for people.

308. I can apply everything you write about the health industry to education. All teachers deeply care and love students; and I see it every day in my interactions with them. However, I could only see overwhelm, rudeness, and anxiety too, if that was all I was prepared to see.

309. I also feel from your sharing Jennifer, how important it is to understand people and their situations. Knowing we are all from love and wish that to be our expression super supports with understanding others.

310. If we want to see situations that confirm the world is uncaring, it can give us an excuse to give up on the world and shut ourselves down to our own love in order to protect ourselves from this unloving world. It becomes a handy excuse to check out from ourselves and the world. And it will be what we will continue to see everywhere. You, however Jennifer, now only see love and this what you reflect to the world. You trust and have not given up on humanity and so you reflect this and observe this. You are then able to bring this natural essence out in others and make the world a greater place because people can start to see there is hope in the world.

     1. This is another reason why TV is to be avoided and why we scrutinise the media’s portrayal of the world. Rarely do we see images of beauty, truly loving relationships and people caring for each other in ordinary everyday situations. Only offering a one-sided view of life builds a picture of an uncaring world, and many people, as you say Gina, use it as as an excuse to give up because they believe this is ‘how it is.’ . Beauty is everywhere. With stillness and presence we are more likely to feel and see it.

311. Brilliant Jennifer. What you are alluding to is how we see things – and if we have an idea that people don’t care then that is what we receive. But through your own self care and self love you have come to understand and observe that everyone in their essence is deeply caring – so this blog is more about how we only see what we want to see.

312. Thanks Jen, having this understanding as a Nurse in your hospital, would bring so much to the other staff that you work with. People love it when they are understood and have space.

313. What a beautiful observation Jennifer. I too have worked in a busy hospital environment where no one ever seems to have enough time to be with patients or demonstrate their care. It is so important to observe these interactions and re-imprint our own beliefs about the system so that we don’t hold this in our body. If we do hold these beliefs in our body, then we are reinforcing them with our every movement rather than breaking them down.

314. Valuing and appreciation is needed for all professions. The more we value what we bring and the difference we make in the world then the more joy-full it is to do our job, and we can become a master!

315. Wow, thanks for sharing Jennifer. One day the medical System will have to change, and more doctors are needed. It is truly remarkable what Doctors do and they really do go out on a limb to make sure their job is done properly. It’s a shame that the job comes with so much stress. More of this valuing and appreciation is needed as it confirms that there is a light in our day and there is a purpose to all that we do in medicine.

316. I completely agree Jen, that at the core of every one of us is our innate care, and when we take responsibility to do so first for our own body, then quite naturally we cannot but show the same care to all others too, no matter what industry we choose to serve within. I love that you have made this potent observation in your workplace, as when we do, we give fuel to more.

317. Hello Jennifer and spot on for me. The world has its things for sure, but the key is how we are in that world. As you are showing, change how you are and the world changes and further, possibly it doesn’t change, just your view of the world changes. If we want the world to continue to ‘be’ the way it is, then we could go on confirming all the things we see that are wrong or we can take a deep look, a deeper care and all of a sudden we see things that were always there, but we were busy seeing other things. It’s great to see people confirming how much we care, thank you Jennifer.

318. This is a great reflection Jennifer…we can miss so much in life if we aren’t connected to ourselves. When we aren’t feeling who we are and are focusing on everything outside of us we don’t get to appreciate these magical moments for the beauty and wisdom they offer.

319. I have always found it easier to judge others and when I walked about in society I would cast my judgments on all who came into my line of sight. Really that was a reflection of how I treated myself and how I felt about me. It was also a convenient way to stay contracted and not engage with humanity. But as I’ve changed the way I treat myself I too have begun to appreciate others and no longer blind myself with consistent judgments. Just yesterday I watched a couple getting out of the car at the supermarket and the woman waited so that she could hold her partner’s hand. Nothing extraordinary but a gesture that was filled with love that I was able to appreciate.

320. I found my prejudices about doctors (and people) coming up as I read this. I was waiting for the part where you would say how uncommon it is for doctors to do this and give some miracle reason as to why these 2 doctors were so caring. It can be easy to remain shut off from people and the world when we perceive everyone to be uncaring. When we let people in we can see something entirely different.

321. It is very beautiful to feel the connections between people as you have observed in your work, Jennifer. Sometime we can forget the power of connection in big workplaces such as hospitals where there is a tendency to be in “rush” all the time. Connecting with another need only be for a few seconds – it is not a time consuming activity, but is a very powerful one.

322. It is beautiful to be reminded of the deep care people have for each other when witnessing a moment like you did. Sadly the system does not seem to foster the expression of this care with patient time being somewhat of a rarity in the face of understaffed hospitals and overworked staff, for when a patient experiences and feels this care directly, it is deeply supportive to their healing process.

323. Thank you, Jennifer, for sharing your observation with us. By sharing what you have become aware of you give me the opportunity to also realize where I observe ‘love’ around me, especially in a work environment. And the more I appreciate myself, the more I am able to see the beauty other people are and bring.

324. How gorgeous that you have come to simply observe your surroundings. So often we simply don’t pay attention to this because we are caught up in our stuff or don’t feel it relevant, but observing can show us so much, and confirm in our bodies what we know to be true; that people are naturally caring and naturally want to connect with each other, just as you observed these 2 doctors doing towards their patient. This allows for so much appreciation, and a reflection to you that this way of supporting the ill is your marker of what is true.

325. Because life is so intense and a lot of what we experience and see is ugly, we tend to shut off and stop to observe and feel life, and walk around in a state of dullness, unaware of what is going on. The sad thing is that we then likewise miss out on the beauty, the love and interconnection that is there and could be seen and felt as well.
     So thank you Jennifer for making us aware of that fact.

326. That’s very true Jennifer, that once we start to recognise qualities within ourselves we start to clock them all around us too. I’ve also noticed it can work the other way round also…noticing a quality in someone else and then beginning to appreciate that quality within myself also.

327. I have found that often when a doctor or nurse is brusque and rushed, and even irritated or angry, it is often because either I have come in with a defensive attitude or they are genuinely caring but anxious about any complications or time restrictions and are actually wanting to do an efficient job. All I need to do then is not react, open my heart, feel what’s going on, understand, and shine my light, then all is taken care of, and they melt a little, relax, and feel accepted.

328. I love when you get an amazing doctor who takes the time to really consider what is going on for you. It makes such a difference. There are many amazing people in health care. I had a hospital stay in recent years and was a bit nervous about the treatment, the doctors and nurses were amazing and very supportive the whole way through – I was amazed, as even in the late hours of the night this care didn’t change.

     1. It feels very comforting when this happens Kristy, especially for patients in an unfamiliar environment. Hospitals can be very scary for some and feeling the care of another can really help us through this process.

     2. I love your comments Kristy and Jennifer, it does make a difference when you feel well cared for, especially when feeling so vulnerable. Having spent New Years Eve in the emergency department a couple of years ago, my experience was very positive and considering the difficult circumstances for the staff, I was well looked after.

     3. The local doctors office, one of the hardest job’s would have to be the receptionist. Everyone you meet always has a need that they require it to be fixed. We treat our body’s like our cars. We use and abuse it then take it in and expect some else to fix it. The medical profession with all the people involved from the cleaners to surgeons are amazing individuals. Do they see through the illness and appreciate what lies with-in? What a great job!

329. If we are all naturally caring, then I have to query what gets in the way of that caring nature expressing? Could it be that we too often reject that care from others and so over time they grow reluctant to show it? It is time to start reflecting our true nature to each other, our truly caring, loving and nurturing natures like these doctors, and stop holding back. Holding back hurts everyone.

     1. Hello Jeannette and these are great questions that I think Jennifer has answered in her blog. Make the change in yourself and the world in front of you changes. As she is saying, what she saw was possibly there before but she had never taken the time to appreciate what she had seen. Jennifer bought a deep level of care to herself and then was open to see the same in the world, in people. If we keep confirming what we are not then this will dominate our view, make a change yourself and start to see all that we are and at some point this will be the world view.

330. It’s an easy concept to adapt to, the greater care you treat yourself, with the greater care you will treat others with.

     1. Hello Joe and it truly is that simple. We get stuck in all manner of other things but simply the deeper care you are and have for yourself then this is the same level that touches all else after that point. There is no end point, no rest but an endless depth of care until the outside is equal to what we already are inside.

331. Jennifer, very beautifully observed and it reminds me that everything we see is through the prism of how we are with us, so if we take greater care and love of us, naturally we are willing to see this around us and in others. And how confirming and gorgeous for you to see those doctors in their discussion and to further understand that we all care, we do, it’s just about allowing ourselves to show that, and not having a set way on how it should be. Thank you, you’ve given me a great insight into how it’s about meeting people and allowing them to express their care in how they do, not how I think they should.

332. Yeehaa! The more appreciation the better, then we actually clock the care that is innate and bring more of it to the fore.

333. Appreciating the innate care in our caring professions – this is a beautiful testimony to all those that choose to work in support of others.

     1. Yes, when you choose to be a doctor you are signing up for a job based on care. That’s the foundation of being a doctor. So even if things do get stressful and rushed, the basis of why you are there is still care. This is not something I have appreciated.

     2. Also one that is sorely lacking Matilda, if we stopped for a moment to appreciate the dedication of medical staff we would perhaps offer the world a new model for medical care.

334. Such care among our Doctors and nurses is often taken for granted and rarely recognised yet is expected as part of their day to day practice. Thank you Jen. To the health professionals we all owe much as humanity would be in a far worse place with out them

335. This is a great observation on all people, not just doctors – people do care – I always thought my mother didn’t really care for us, but realise now, some years after her death – she did care in whatever ways she could – she loved her daughters, her grandchildren and her great grandchildren – and they in turn loved her back. Sending her daughters to boarding school was her way of caring. I never really fully appreciated that till now.

     1. This is so true Carmel, we tend to just look at situations from our hurts and judge people from there, but once we truly let go of our hurts our view broadens and we see the bigger picture.

336. I was thinking the same thing Marika. What we see depends on how we are living with ourselves.

337. Catching these moments where we see others caring is a gift and a confirmation of how we can still look after each other in a busy and sometimes very stressful environment. When we make it about people first, everyone wins.

     1. It is testimony to who we truly are when we make it about people, all equally ourselves included and doing so under circumstances and in a system that is not constructed and run to support loving care is highlighting the fact.

338. I always noticed when a doctor was off hand or less than attentive so it is lovely to equally observe when they are truly dedicated and caring. These days it is my experience that they are very caring and if they are distracted I can see why. These days I am much more caring of myself so that I align more quickly with someone who is having my health interests at heart. I find I am also interested in the doctors self care so if they are late I am not annoyed because I have an inkling of how busy they are, how emergencies can present and that they are human beings with the need for rest and food just like me.

339. Thank you Jennifer, this is refreshing to read as it has become common to hear about the complaints in regards to the service and care offered by medical professionals. My experience from what I have received has been very caring in recent years however the care I have shown my self has changed during this time which means I have not expected to be fixed by the doctors but rather to appreciate the expertise they offer our physical bodies whilst caring for myself deeply. It makes sense therefore when you say “As I ponder on why I am observing this now and not so much before, I can only put it down to how I treat and care for myself. The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.”

340. A very touching blog Jennifer. We are usually so quick to judge people based on our past experiences and beliefs about people in particular professions etc. But fundamentally we are all human. It is lovely to read of the care that you noticed from these two doctors. Thank you for sharing.

     1. I agree Rebecca, the stop moment Jen took was played forward for me too in reading of the observation that took place, appreciation feeding appreciation, beautiful!

341. Thank you for sharing your appreciation of the care these 2 doctors took to connect with the patient whilst being professional. So often the system seems to work against this but it is great to acknowledge the genuine care delivered by so many in the health services around the world at a time of ever increasing pressure on resources because of escalating rates of illness and disease.

342. My experience of Doctors is that they are often rushed and can appear quite cold and distant. Yet I am sure there is so much more going on for them and the stress and demands of their job make us less likely to be witness to the type of situation you describe Jennifer. It is great to read of your appreciation for the Doctors and show that they care. I read recently there is a website that is appreciating all the great things that happen in the UK NHS, as the press choose not to print anything but the negative and this does not reflect the real story of the many positive stories that occur everyday.

     1. Great point Stephen, as we can either tend to focus only on what we ironically don’t like/want to see, all the while grumbling and moaning it shouldn’t be that way, or we can see all there is to see. This all starts from what we’re willing to see of ourselves first, when done so without judgement and with loving care, then what is observed can be appreciated for all it is showing us to learn from.

     2. This is a good point Stephen. The press have a great deal to do with how we perceive doctors and have so much power and influence in what the public get to see and therefore think. Yes, doctors can be rushed and are usually very stressed, but this does not change the fact that they are human and ultimately are in a caring profession.

     3. Yes Stephen this is yet another example of what the press withholds. There is so much excellent work and great things happening, but that doesn’t make for news worthy headlines. We never get the whole picture with the press, but reading this blog and the many comments has opened my eyes to the fantastic job our healthcare workers are doing.

343. I agree absolutely. I’ve spent more than my fair share of time in hospitals recently visiting a beloved relative, and when I put aside all the negative press, the crazy hours, the millions of bits of paperwork… the care and total dedication that Doctors and Nurses exhibit is quite extraordinary. In particular this was a Oncology unit, and watching the skill and humanity with which the Doctor would see patient after patient literally discussing life and death situations I was humbled. When it came to our turn, and the news was not good, there was no question that we felt met and cared for to the very highest degree.

     1. Thats an incredible story Simon, thank you for sharing it so generously. I have a great respect for Doctors and Nurses as it is a very demanding job on so many levels. It just blows me away that so many people are willing dedicate all that study and then long shift work in order to care for others.

        1. Speaking to the Doctors and Nurses, it does seem to be a life choice… to dedicate them selves to these long hours, the study and give up many other aspects of life in service. Yet when I took some time to connect with them I could see that the job satisfaction was enormous.

        2. That is very true, I can imagine it would be very hard but also rewarding.

     2. This is a great sharing and shows that we often refer to systems and structures or professions, like hospitals, doctors, etc. forgetting that they are all people and that everybody is genuinely caring. If there is lack of care it is the pressure to perform that often takes the care out of everything we do and nobody feels good about that, we are just so used to perform that we often forget what our true foundation is.

344. In a way we see what we want to see to confirm the beliefs and ideals we hold. I can imagine we sometimes see only one part of a conversation that confirms our belief when if we would have seen all of it, it would have been a different picture! Great blog because it shows how our perceptions can be so tainted by how we care and look after ourselves first.

345. You have really got me pondering with what you so beautifully share Jennifer, as to how much I actually observe that is going on around me as closely as you did in this instance; how many ordinary, but at the same time amazing, moments am I missing out on experiencing and learning from because I’m not taking the time to stop and observe? Today I will take this time.

346. You are so right Doug, when we rush, the world and everyone in it disappears… including ourselves.

     1. So true Steve

     2. A great statement Steve, and rush has a huge impact on our bodies too.

     3. Beautifully said Steve, when we rush, i.e. go against our natural flow there is no benefit in it for anybody as it brings disturbance to us all.

     4. Yes, so true. I have experienced this. It feel awful to be in a rush, it doesn’t make us work or move efficiently and quality goes out the window. We lose connection with ourselves and with others.

     5. Very very true Steve, when we rush we disappear as we lose our quality, and our movement introduces a quality that is not who we are. Love it.

347. I love this jen. You really get me thinking…..again. I will definitely try to put this focus in practice more at work. I do find myself thinking a lot about the negative things I see and feel at work as a RN. And it is having a huge negative impact on my career. Thanks Jen. Love this.

     1. The people in our medical systems are under such pressure to perform, and sometimes (incorrectly) a huge burden placed on them to “save” people. Understanding through observation is a skill that would support many in expanding their appreciation for all the work being done.

     2. Hi Skye. One thing that I have found the most supportive is how I am appreciating myself and not just the things that I do, but appreciating the quality of how I am and how this feels in my body. So for example clocking when I am being gentle and the effect that this has on another, but also myself has been key.

348. “One thing that I have come to understand is that we are all genuinely caring and this is our true nature, but sometimes for whatever reason we don’t allow ourselves to show this.” I can feel that this is absolutely true for me and that it is important to be consciously aware of, as we tend to see the world as only bad because we put our emphasis on that, but if we truly open our eyes there is a lot more to see and that is that love is all around us, which is mostly reflected in the way people are caring for one another. I have learned, as you have Jennifer, that I am only able to see these reflections of love because I have allowed that same love that lives in me to be part of my life. Before I could do that it was much harder for me to see the love and care that everywhere lives in our societies.

349. Thanks Jennifer for sharing a lovely moment. It is interesting to recognise that there is a reciprocal relationship between self love and what we see and how we process interactions going on around us. Tending to our own self love and care, has an positive impact in the relationships we have with people and with life.

350. Thank you for sharing when so much of what we share is how we are not seing this in our health systems, and what a great testimonial for those doctors, particularly seeing as it sounds like it was a completely normal occurrence for them.

     1. I agree Lucy, most of what we hear or read about the healthcare is what is missing, or how care for people is missing. Jen’s testimonial makes it very clear, the system can be impersonal but most of the staff is there because of they love to care.

351. I wonder if the doctors received a confirmation of their being caring by you observing them being caring. We are all connected and notice what other people notice.

     1. Only your wondering about it confirms to me already that they did.

     2. I agree, Christoph, if we appreciate another it is felt by others. It establishes a foundation of trust.

     3. My personal experience is why make them guess… the simplest way to let them know is to appreciate them at every turn.

        1. So simple so true – Thank you Simone.

        2. Yes Simon I agree. In my experience that is a profound difference felt and a beautiful foundation that is established in a relationship when we express how we feel through the words we share in appreciation of the love and care we feel. A great way of building a relationship of trust and confirming the activity of love and truth we feel for ourselves and with others.

        3. That is a truly excellent point.

        4. Absolutely Simon, we don’t have to wait for other to claim or ask for it, we just can live in a deeply appreciating way, which also does not have to be in words all the time. To confirm our true grandness is the way forth and out of the illusion that makes us believe we can live in a way defining ourselves by what we are not.

        5. Yes Simon, I have started the habit of expressing my appreciation for colleagues at work and also to my family and friends. Not only does it feel good for the person receiving it, it also feels good to me saying it.

     4. That’s a great point that you raise Christoph. No I didn’t confirm my observations with the doctors at the time. But I did with one of them later on. Appreciating each other is super important in health care (and any where else too). To be honest it really doesn’t happen enough. This is something that I am going to work on to a greater capacity.

     5. I was considering this a little more this morning – why is it that I have held back in appreciating others? There is an ugly wart of comparison that stands out… that often I’m too busy thinking ‘why didn’t I make that choice, do that thing, be that loving’ so it all becomes about me, and the opportunity to simply appreciate the other person passes. What a waste!

352. Life is about being always on and not checking out and letting things pass by and your sharing here Jen shows beautifully the joy of being always present. Every moment counts and has something to offer for the all.

     1. We are not born with an on/off switch, but we create one. We are only here for a short time why would we wish to waste a single moment!

        1. Love it Steve, there is no on/off switch built in and it is a massive illusion to believe that we can constantly switch off from life. We miss out on the true beauty we could be living when constantly on and serving the divine plan.

     2. Awesome reminder Rachelandras, and how much we actually miss out when we are not fully present is huge. We can then lose sight of the magnificent and beauty that constantly surrounds us.

353. What a beautiful connection, situation and energy between two doctors, and others, that you observed and deeply appreciated. This reflection back to you is such a confirmation of the care you take for yourself and others. Thank you Jennifer for this inspirational and wise blog, a simple yet divine reflection for us all.

354. This is so true Gill. When we stop and realise that this person needs support and that we are able to offer this, we can’t but step forward and be there for another.

355. Jennifer this is truly a special moment as it shows the level of sincere care and love these doctors have for the profession and what this brings to the patients in their care. They were seeing beyond the diagnosis and what this means for the loved ones in this patients life. Truly beautiful to read.

     1. I agree nb. It would be incredible to see this taught at every medical school across the world – that patient AND self care is super important and needed in order to support the patients at hospitals in full, and see beyond just the diagnosis.

356. You have named a big issue in healthcare Doug – time. It seems like whole shifts can be spent racing against the clock, trying to get everything done. But what patients appreciate so much is you just being there with them. You are right that just one person like Jen stepping out of this whirlwind can allow others to see that they don’t need to do this either, and allow them the space to express the care that is there.

     1. That’s true Fiona. I recall the day and I was actually quite busy. So how could I notice this exquisite moment whilst being busy and dealing with many other patients? The truth is it is a choice what we observe and how we are observing something. If we observe something with an investment of how it should look like, then we are automatically seeing through a filter and more likely to observe through the eyes of judgement.

     2. I agree Doug, we underestimate what influence we have on each other, the same way we get caught in the whirl of stress because everybody is abiding to it we can bring a presence that does not follow this stream of motion but brings a different quality to life.

357. It is great how you observed this moment and then appreciated it as well as reflecting on how much you have grown and changed being able to see others in a different light and no longer make assumptions. Doctors and nurses do such a terrific job ✨

358. Awesome Blog Jen. It is amazing how we have filters on what we see depending on how we are feeling ourselves. As a nurse I have also observed the doctors who may be brilliant at their work but don’t have a good bedside manner. But these are the minority and although they may appear uncaring, they may just need to learn how to express this care. I agree doctors are extremely caring and aware of all the issues that can affect a person’s health.

     1. One person’s version of care may look completely different to another person’s. For example one Doctor may see care as being on time and ensuring every patient is fully reviewed and informed. This may not look caring to some from the outside, but the care is a clear dedication of commitment to the wellbeing of the patient.

359. A beautiful sharing and so true from my experience also. The more i am learning to care and love myself the more i see this in everyone else. Seeing humanity in the beauty and lovingness we all are and the deep care we have for each other is a truthful place to come to and allows one also to call out what is not loving in ourselves and to heal our hurts also and brings a great clarity to life .

     1. Beautifully expressed Tricia. It’s like we get back the ‘awe and delight in life’ glasses we had as little kids, when we feel that within ourselves. Perhaps the world wouldn’t be the way it is if we all took steps to put these glasses back on.

     2. And it has a ripple effect. We treat ourselves with more care and we can then see that in others. This then ripples out and we treat others with more care. When we treat another with such care it can inspire them to treat themselves and others with more care and on it goes. The first drop in the pond is the way we are with ourselves.

360. Yes Jennifer, it is amazing how the world reflects back to us what we see to confirm so much to us.. when we are prepared to see, as so often we can overlook or dismiss the effect that gestures of true care and love, or its opposite, say for example abruptness/harshness can have on us.

     1. That’s true Zofia, when we are prepared to see, we cannot block out anything. We see everything, and it’s not all pretty.

361. Thank you, Jennifer. This was a great prompt. I realise how I was holding up an image of perfection, particularly for those in professions such as doctors, teachers etc. to be somehow faultless, and I was less patient and understanding towards them, and never really appreciated them to be as equally human as myself.

     1. I can do the same Fumiyo and I am now reflecting on the fact that I also vary in what I offer to people each day depending on the level of self care I am providing for myself. So it’s a two way street. We are all human and so imperfection is always going to be present. But I realise I can take more time to notice and appreciate it when others are quietly going about their day in a caring way and to likewise remain accountable for what I am offering others.

     2. The appreciation of ourselves and others is a quality sorely missing in society, and yet one that is so simple to introduce.

     3. I like this observation about perfection Fumiyo. I’ve had this tendency too, which means it’s a demand I also hold for myself. I guess what we’re saying here is whatever lens we view the world through – be it love, perfectionism, care or devastation – this is a direct reflection of the way we are with ourselves.

362. I often clock uncaring behaviour and seldom appreciate interactions like the one you describe. I have an expectation that everyone should be that way all of the time, and when they are not, I am disappointed and judgmental. Thank you for the wonderment that you express – as you share, caring is natural for everyone, we just don’t always choose that behaviour.

     1. I can relate to that tendency to clock the abrasive and dismiss the wonder in life. But the more we do clock the wonder the more we see and things bring balance and understanding.

        1. I can relate to this tendency too Fiona, and have often wondered why? Maybe it is that the “abrasive” as you put it has the drama in it that I used to fuel my life. I am beginning to notice more and more of the ordinary interactions in life and can now see how much they offer to me, the observer.

        2. Why is it that beautiful gems of interactions that occur in our day can often be swept aside by an instant of drama or negativity? Accepting, confirming and appreciating all beautiful happenings in our day, down to the smallest detail is so important, and we can be surprised at just how many there are.

     2. It’s weird isn’t it how we can so easily focus on the negative. For me the key is understanding… if I take a moment to consider what the other person is experiencing (which I can feel, I don’t have to know every intricate detail of their day), then I am not so quick to judge.

        1. That’s always important Simon to bring the understanding. I am also learning the more I do this with myself, like not judge myself for the not so great choices, the more I am able to be understanding of others and also the more I support and appreciate myself, the less I put expectations onto others to be a certain way.

        2. Great point to share Simon. Understanding is key, through which we are able to see clearly what is truly going on rather that reacting and judge another for the separation of Love that they are experiencing in that moment. We then understand that it is an energy coming through and not from them as in essence we are all Love first and foremost. For me this allows us to be Love and hold the Love we are through which we are appreciating that in essence we are all the same Great Love.

        3. Yes Simon I agree, having the awareness, which allows us to pause and feel what might be going on for the other person stops that knee jerk reaction and judgement gets replaced with understanding.

     3. Yes we need more appreciation and confirmation of moments like this as it is our inherent nature and essence. Yet we spend so much time noticing where we do not get the care and love we want.

        1. and in so doing forfeit a deeper healing that is forever awaiting us. Yet the more we choose to appreciate, the more our observation broadens, the more opportunity to deepen our love, and the greater the healing for all.

        2. I did this recently my daughter and I had had a great morning together but then in the last 10mins of getting out the door we got very cross with each other and it was horrible, as we were walking down the street I said what I had appreciated about the morning, and it totally shifted how we were with each other. It is so easy to make the 10mins feel like everything when in fact it was one part of a whole, but we need to appreciate the whole.

        3. Great observation Vanessa. I can do that at work as well. I have a great day, but one small thing goes wrong and I can make it feel like the whole week is wrecked. What a wonderful way you switched things around with your daughter by appreciating the morning you had together. Thanks for sharing that.

        4. I agree Jenny and Vanessa, sometimes there is too much focus on the bad moments instead of appreciating the whole.

     4. This is really important to recognize Carmin as I often do a similar thing, often seeing the negative and not celebrating and appreciating the positive. Thank you Jennifer for sharing this lovely moment.

     5. Or sometimes circumstances make it hard for the person or people we are observing to be caring in that particular moment – maybe something has happened that has thrown them off balance. Our judgements in these moments (or in any moment!) are not helpful.

363. ‘The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.’ – a gorgeous relationship to develop; one with others through ourselves.

     1. Yes Michael, one that is true, allowing the love we are to be.

     2. It’s like the best kind of self-fulfilling prophecy – one we can embrace rather than turn away from. By investing in ourselves we invest in mankind.

        1. The key to brotherhood is living the understanding we re-develop of ourselves, with all others equally so.

364. Thank you Jen, for a great article, I went to a club meeting the other day and really noticed how caring and accepting the people were with each other, beautiful to observe in ourselves and others. As you said this innately who we are.

     1. Love is there everywhere if you look for it. It may not look the way you expect it to but it will be there. How can it not when that is who we are?

        1. That’s a huge one Fiona – that love may not look the way you are expecting it to look, or the way you want it to be or need it to be.

        2. Yes Kristy and Fiona, we have so many images of what love should look like and be it gets in the way of the love! We create our own prisons and then wonder why the world is so horrible and violent. We are the gate keepers of our world inner and outer.

        3. I agree Fiona and this only comes from the way that we care for ourselves. The more loving and tender we are we see and feel that in another. The opposite is also true. The harder and harsher we are with ourselves, we are more likely to see and feel that in the world.

        4. Beautifully said Fiona, how could love not be there shining through wherever we look when that is who we are.

        5. That is beautiful and so true Fiona, and perhaps also what I am learning more is that love is not what I thought it was and so love will not come in an emotional bundle, but instead be in an act that is more pure and not attached to need or desire.

        6. Great observation Fiona! The logic is irrefutable – love is who we are so it must be there. Sometimes it might just be a little buried or hidden in the other, or as you say, obscured by our expectations.

     2. What we will allow ourselves to be observers of creates our own internal view of the world. The challenge is we when think that internal view is the real thing, when really it is our version of the world, based purely on our interpretations.

     3. I have been observing and appreciating this more of late too Jill. It is amazing how once we develop this within ourselves we can then more clearly see and appreciate it in others.

365. Yes, there is much in life that does not feel true or loving. But the more presence and observation we bring, judgement free, the more we are able to appreciate the beauty that already exists in life. Your words suggest to me Jen, that living in a loving way will not come from radical re-arrangement of our world but through us building deep appreciation into every part of our day.

     1. Love it the appreciation revolution!

     2. I agree Joseph, there does not need to be any ‘radical rearrangement’ as you say, but a commitment that is simply about making more loving choices and yes, making appreciation a foundational part of each day.

        1. It is a wonderful thing to realise that how we feel about ourselves is colouring what we are able to see in the world, it is pervasive if it is a negative view but equally a deep beauty when you chose to be more loving with yourself.

     3. Yes, Joseph, it is not a massive shift of mental constructs that needs to occur but a step by step building of appreciation and care in our lives, for ourselves as a steady foundation, and then naturally so for everyone else.

     4. Indeed Doug, changing the world from within ourselves and then outwardly. As Jen described we can offer so much reflection by deepening the relationship of self-love and care for ourselves and an important part of this process is the appreciation of our own preciousness.

     5. Love what you’ve shared here Joseph about the more presence and observation we bring – the more beauty we see.

     6. Very true Joseph. There is much in this world that is untrue, unloving and not worthy of appreciation, but within us all there is far more that is worth appreciating. Interesting to note that these loveless ways stem from a lack of appreciating our worth, who we truly are. The more we appreciate who we are the more we build our confidence to bring our truth and love to our relationships through the way we live and the more we are then able to discern the ways of love and truth that are also being expressed and already are present in this world.

     7. Yes and I love being able to see all the little moments in nature and in others it is truly beautiful seeing harmony in action which is what nature is.

     8. What an awesome contribution Joseph, thank you for the reminder to keep things simple and build this appreciation into our day.

     9. Absolutely Joseph. I have found that appreciation of self and others has been fundamental in deepening my connection to self and connection to love.

     10. I agree Doug and Joseph, appreciating all the same things in life makes such a difference. It turns the so called trivial and mundane into something enjoyable. There is so much around us we can learn from and appreciate the more we open our eyes to it the more we see it.

         1. A no brainer indeed Doug, but yet it is something most of us find extremely difficult and struggle with. However, the more I appreciate myself the more and more simple and natural it becomes. I also see the depth of beauty in other people and appreciate them far more as well.

         2. I agree Doug, it can turn a miserable day, one where everything appears to be going wrong completely around. By stopping to appreciate life, ourselves and everyone around us we get to enjoy the magic and beauty that abounds us and is on offer if only we choose to open our eyes to it.

     11. I love what you have shared Joseph. That has certainly been my experience having gone through radical rearrangements previously in my life as well as building deep appreciation. The latter is the thing that has made a huge difference, not only at work, but all throughout my life.

     12. Doug it will change the world, one ripple of appreciation at a time, and every once in a while there might be an explosion of bile by those for whom appreciation brings up too many past hurts.

     13. Alchemy by reflection – our way of being and expressing resonating in others and inspiring not only change but development towards a unified loving togetherness.

         1. Yes, it is the alchemy of love that inspires another to transform from what they are not, but identified by, to simply who they innately are without any imposition, ideal or belief.

     14. The lack of true appreciation for who we are and what we really bring is something for all of us to deeply consider, for the key to growth and development lies there. Appreciation is such a crucial ingredient to build into our daily lives and to never forget to nominate. So opposite from what we have been fed to believe that we are ‘up ourselves’ is we do that.

     15. To live a un-loving way of life is the real radical re-arrangement that is not natural.

     16. Very well said Joseph!

     17. You can see how, with it’s 24-7 litany of unendingly terrible events, the news works to undermine our appreciation of the world. It’s observation and reporting only reinforces a negative world-view. Clearly not a lot of loving’ going on there!

     18. Absolutely agree Joseph. It is so true and an awesome reminder of how powerful appreciation is. The more we express appreciation the more we contribute to true change.

366. I loved reading of your increasing awareness Jen, of how what we observe in others is a reflection of our own willingness to be with ourselves as well as with others, re-igniting that natural side of ourselves that can learn and evolve through observation. What we see around us is a direct reflection of what is within us at that time, whether it’s positive or negative, it’s all there for the learning and evolving if we so choose to accept it.

367. It is wonderful to read through the observation of one who works within in the hospital system, as you do Jennifer, of your appreciation of your fellow workers and receive the assurance of the deep level of care that the medical team and staff provide to their patients. To realise and understand this has come from the more loving care you are willing to provide for yourself demonstrates, what we reflect out is what is reflected back to us.

     1. Thank you Deidre, much like the style of Jennifer’s blog, you have put this beautifully and simply “what we reflect out is what is reflected back to us.”

     2. Most definitely nobody enters the health profession unless they are wanting to serve others as it is such a gruelling pace of work and the money is not great compared to say banking. There is a real purpose and calling that most are responding to. I have so much respect for these professions.

     3. So true deidremedbury. It is difficult to see that which we are not open to seeing but when we work on our own self love and care it becomes more apparent when we observe this in another. It is lovely to appreciate these qualities in another as it also confirms them in us.

     4. So very true Deidre, what we reflect out to others comes back to us, so we hold a great responsibility in all our actions, for ourselves and for all others.

368. Thank you Jennifer, I loved reading your insights and your observations. Thank you for sharing your genuine appreciation of your colleagues and fellow human beings. I could feel your joy at being in the space to be able to take it all in.

369. You have described perceptions and images Jennifer and they way they stand in the way of what is going on. We want caring to look a certain way, but often, in the intensity of life it will not look like that at all. That does not mean it is not caring.
     This does not mean that we are to ignore awful behaviour and call it ‘caring’. But we need to be more understanding of our doctors, more willing to see them as human beings, with all of the frailties, and vulnerabilities we all have.

     1. great point Rachel! There is a huge image/perception about what caring is. The truth is that medical staff are under a lot of stress, so its hard for them to care. Treating people as an equal and like a friend is a great start! Doctors are often thought of as ‘Doctors’ and identified with their role, they’re people too and would appreciate if they were treated like a person too!

        1. We are called to look at situations more deeply, not through the filter of what we think ought to be. Some doctors don’t want to be treated as people…that is OK too, because like it or not they are! What I love about this blog is that it acknowledges appreciation of what people and doctors do bring…just as they are, doing the best they can in a difficult setting.

     2. That is a great point Rachel, understanding – getting rid of the set picture we have, is such a beautiful thing, and to be held with this by another in life or at work is equally beautiful and spacious to experience.

        1. We yearn to be seen for who we are…no matter how apparently powerful our position, how smart or how qualified.

     3. Caring for others comes naturally and does not need to be taught for it is genuine and heart felt – it is gorgeous however to watch it deepen and expand when we apply the care to ourselves as well.

     4. I agree Doug. More is being written about this in medical literature as burnout rates in medicine have reached a critical point. Again, this is not a rationalisation for putting up with poor treatment or behaviour. But we must consider that as the population gets sicker with more complex disease, the pressure on doctors rises exponentially. We are creating illness faster than the literature and training can keep up. And so many of those diseases are preventable. How many people make the changes that work with the doctor? How many people refuse to change and want the doctor to make it go away?
        It is time for us as patients to look at life from the doctors perspective and appreciate the dedication they bring in overwhelming situations.

370. What you’ve shared Jennifer is interesting, in that you seeing the care between others more so than ever, is a result of you being more caring with yourself. So the more we love, care and nurture ourselves means we see the smallest ways in which other people do this for themselves and others. It’s all in the detail.

371. Jennifer, this is very relevant and key: “The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others” – this is something that I too have experienced and love when it happens to my level of awareness. There is a joy and a genuine uplifting experience when we recognise a beautiful quality in another, and the reality is that in order for us to recognise this in another, we must have that quality within ourselves too! How amazing is this!

     1. Dear Henrietta, this stood out for me today as well and I know this to be true because it is my experience as well. And it is exquisite to notice a beautiful quality in another and to observe life as it truly is without any pictures or ideals/beliefs around it.

        1. When we look at life with pictures or ideals and beliefs then we miss out on what is really there – and yes there is a lot we won’t like to see, but there is so much of beauty and love there too to support us, to hold us, and help us understand all that is around us. It is simply for us to be open and take things moment by moment. And hence as you have said Sarah, when we drop the pictures an ideals and beliefs, then we open ourselves up to feeling the qualities in others.

     2. Agree Henrietta, we are the reflection to others and others are the reflection to us. It all flows together and we live the responsibility of it.

        1. This is the way we can piece things back together, how we can return to the wholeness that we once came from. Each person reflects on aspect, one quality specifically “needed” by each of us. This is about brotherhood – all of us coming together and sharing in full our qualities with one another, no holding back. And in this we can learn from each other and grow and unfold into the next phase.

     3. I love this beautiful truth Henrietta of appreciating the Love of another – ‘in order for us to recognise this in another, we must have that quality within ourselves too’. To truly know the Love of one is to truly know the Love of all. Thank you sharing the wisdom of our Love with us all.

        1. Words of a Master, Carola: “To truly know the Love of one is to truly know the Love of all.” – you have nailed it here. And hence we can turn it around and say too that you cannot think that you love another more than you love yourself or someone else. Love is (yes, just simply IS) and Love has no calibration – and so you can only love everyone equally, including yourself.

     4. Yes, I agree Henrietta and beautifully expressed. The joy we feel when we appreciate others and ourselves is certainly incredible.

        1. It is incredible Chan – far better than any chocolate cake or ice-cream or treat we could shovel into our mouths! The joy we feel when we appreciate others and ourselves is like a gentle volcano of joyful bubbles bursting out from the body and then we feel an openness and an expansion and a lightness of being. Well this has been my experience, though of course others may experience it slightly differently – the commonality will be the lightness of being and expansion or confirmation of ourselves.

        2. Awesome Henriettta, I have a very similar feeling. When I am like this I feel a fullness and expansion in my body, I tend to eat less but have more energy and feel amazing. So I realise when I appreciate myself and others through being deeply connected to myself, being soulful, I literally feel FULL.

372. Really lovely to feel and read how your awareness of self and the way in which you treat you has had such an impact on the way you now see and perceive others Jennifer. It is amazing to appreciate when we actually stop, observe and clock these interactions between people because what gets reflected (as you so beautifully expressed) is the fact that underneath all the rush and motion of life we get caught in, is a true desire to care, nurture and connect with each other.

     1. It is gorgeous that amoungst all the seeming chaos of life you can observe moments that are so heart warming they remind you of the immense beauty that is possible between people when we don’t allow all the outside interferences or pressures of life to enter.

373. Jennifer I love this observation of our true caring nature in action that you have shared in appreciation with us. I agree that this is who we are in essence, yet at times we lose sight of and touch with this truth. I also love the appreciation of the loving choices you have made to deeply care for yourself, as the more we do appreciate our loving way the more we are able to recognise the same in others, and when we express this we confirm the truth being lived in that moment. It is so important to express these moments of truth that we observe, big or small, as this appreciation of ourselves and each other confirms our natural way, the qualities of love that we innately are and are born to live.

374. Dear Jennifer,
     I loved reading your observation here, how you now see around you the love and care of others and how your understanding and love of yourself has literally opened you to see this. It is so very humbling to feel the impact of true self love. As with out this key factor, we are all blind to the exquisite beauty of care and love that is lived by many people, everyday.

375. Reading your blog Jennifer I too am reminded of the genuine care and love that I see displayed by my medical and nursing colleagues every day. However this ability to continue to care for people who are ill rests on our ability to care for ourselves first and foremost. If we do not self-care then burnout occurs and this is what is happening in medicine and nursing currently. There is a huge need to learn to self-care. I certainly had to and it has completely changed the way that I live and be with people now.

     1. There are huge pressures put on our healthcare workers and they are often stretched to the max. I agree with you Elizabeth that developing self-care is an essential element in avoiding burnout and upping the quality of care for all.

     2. This is so true Elizabeth, no matter what the industry we are all subject to burnout without a solid foundation of self-care and self-love. This also includes learning how to be in the world without taking on the emotions of others.

     3. That is huge Elizabeth.. as you say the pressures are enormous, and the system itself may not be geared up to provide either the best patient care or look after the medical staff. But if you introduce responsibility into the equation, for Doctors and Nurses to also look after themselves… then that has the ability to transform both the system, and the patient care.

     4. Beautifully said, Elizabeth. Self-Care needs to be part of our job remit – an integral responsibility – so that we can deliver high standards of care consistently.

     5. The pressure in the health care system is immense and burnout prolific. It makes absolute sense that self-care be a priority to not only be able to cope with the intensity but to be able to reflect to others the importance in looking after yourself. There is a true strength and vitality in self and in service that can come from supporting yourself in this way.

376. “The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.”
     Jennifer, this is such a game changing statement for me as it allows me to appreciate the true beauty in others, as it is first in our essence which goes for all of us. I could feel the deep honouring you felt when observing your colleagues which is something I appreciate in you so much. Thank you

     1. I agree Anne, appreciating this heart warming exchange grows our awareness and expands our hearts

377. How Lovely and Light to read this Jennifer. I can feel your Joyful wonderment of what is going on in the hospital. I agree, we are all very, very caring beings – yet to show that in full is something we seem to have lost. Yet in Truth we’re so hurt and hardly see reflections of the Love that we are, that we often choose to find an anonymous way through life. Seemingly anonymous that is… Because in Truth, everybody is important. We don’t have to know everything, we’re allowed to make mistakes, we’re all learning. How Beautiful is it to live in a world where we are together on the one big school called Life. If we are to confirm and share these Beautiful everyday experiences we’re to experience a total different life. It is indeed up to us what Life reflects.

378. I too have no doubt that we are naturally caring Jennifer, but we can forget to do this when we are stressed anxious or rushing against time. That is why it is so lovely to read about the two doctors taking the time to make sure the patient was well looked after, as we so often hear stories of doctors under pressure and being rushed and acting in a cold dis-interested manner.

379. I have often heard the comment that “it costs nothing to smile”. This is true, but to be able to smile outwards we have to smile inwards first, we smile at ourselves. When we build a loving relationship with our own body, it becomes impossible to not love outwards and the world needs love right now, it’s a smile and a love that doesn’t need anything from anyone, but it is just awesome to see it and feel it.

     1. Beautifully put Matthew. There is a huge difference between a smile that is orchestrated to achieve an outcome or a smile back, and a smile that’s natural with no strings attached – just love!

     2. I love this comment Matthew. A ‘put on’ smile that does not come from the inside first can easily be spotted. And yes a smile costs nothing. Sometimes when I receive a genuine one from a random stranger or a work colleague, it does brighten up my day.

     3. Indeed Doug, there more I make it about me, I am pushed for time, do not take the time to be present in the moment and unable to be there for others.

380. When you open up to caring, not only you practice it yourself, but also start paying attention to other people doing it. Only this allows observations based on facts and not options that are only fed by images that may not be true.

     1. True Eduardo, taking time to make this part of your daily practice makes it much easier to be more aware of how you look at life.

     2. Yes only by embodying it we can truly let go of the images that have governed us for lifetimes.

     3. Yes Eduardo, and I also find appreciation plays a big part in how we see ourselves and others.

     4. There is definite distinction on caring for others based on our images of what service is or what is expected by our organisation. What is so lovely in this instance is that if was noticed that this was needed in this moment and how people so readily respond.

381. Thank you Jennifer, truly awesome work. I love how you share so openly ,that which is so often not said not expressed not shared. And that by virtue of the beliefs you held, you were unable to truly see what was happening at the time, and so had missed moments that there was indeed a true care. As it is so important to stand still and acknowledge when love is expressed, as continuously looking for errors is simple. Let’s encourage ourselves to truly ignite the true beauty within.

382. Very beautifully expressed Jen. Thank you.

383. Great article Jennifer and the line ” The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.” really stood out as this has been my experience also. I now see this genuine caring and tenderness in so many situations that I would not have previously expected to see it, as my ideas were essentially blocking what I saw in the world and influencing the way I interacted with others.

     1. The more I bring genuine care to myself the more I also recognise the moments which stand out where I get caught up in life and am not offering this equally to others and in doing so deny them a moment of true care and connection. Something before self-care I did not even contemplate let alone be able to recognise and address.

        1. Beautifully said Samantha!

384. This is a truly gorgeous sharing Jennifer. You have me wondering how many beautiful moments I have failed to recognise over my lifetime! I love the link you make between your relationship with yourself and the way you view the world. It helps me to understand that everything is a reflection.

     1. I totally agree with you, Leonne. While I was too busy protecting myself from all the evils in the world, I was blinding myself from the loveliness in the world just as much.

        1. Indeed Fumiyo, to protect myself from hurts I used the very ugly attitude of cynicism. As this now drops away through the way of the livingness and my deepening appreciation of myself as a woman the whole world and other people are also there to appreciate.

385. “we are in this business because we truly love to care”. And you do, all of you, and it feels important that we keep on observing and appreciating that, as all those people out there working in hospitals are first and foremost human being, and can like you say, have a bad day as well.

386. Jennifer this is a wonderful acknowledgment of your growing awareness. lt makes sense that when we take care of ourselves our sensitivity develops for others and the ripples we begin within ourselves grow ever wider and wider. lt is so important being part of your workplace that you support your fellow staff members. l feel sure that they could feel that utmost support you gave them and l have no doubt that your choice to appreciate them enabled them to do a lovely job with the patient. So inadvertently everyone wins. That’s worth celebrating. You are an inspiration Jennifer. Thank you.

387. Thanks Jen, my experience has been the same, the more I have explored the way of the livingness, the more I have begun to see and appreciate a range of so amazing qualities people bring to their lives

     1. I have found honouring ourselves through applying self-care to our lives allows us to see amazing qualities we possess not previously recognised that are worth cherishing and sharing…. ultimately this fosters an appreciation for self previously denied, that when embraced supports others to live and do the same.

388. Jennifer I agree that we are all truly caring people. I am often astounded by the lengths some staff will go to to support our students (I work for a tertiary education provider) simply because they care, even though we work in a system that is harsh and constantly demanding more of staff due to dwindling resources. What makes me and others get out of bed each morning is that we care about the people we serve. Although my example is not exactly about medicine, we provide education for nurses, allied health professionals, social workers, psychologists and financial administrators who are all future or current health workers or policy makers. Since embracing the teachings of Universal Medicine I too have learned how to care for myself so that a greater quality of care can be offered to others, especially in the super busy times.

389. It is so good to hear about doctors and hospital staff being genuinely caring. Often they are put down by the disappointed expectations of the patients without consideration of the hard and often overwhelming conditions of the medical system.

     1. This is an important point here Alex and I certainly agree, they are not seen for all their hard efforts but instead for what they are not living up to.

     2. Well said Alex – so many healthcare staff are working in health systems which involve working conditions which are far from conducive to the outcomes which patients expect, in turn the health care systems are also under such pressure due to the exponential increase in disease and illness, ultimately from lack of responsibility for how we all live. So when people complain about poor experiences of doctors, nurses and other healthcare staff, they are looking to blame others and not seeing the experience they have as a result of their own or society’s collective choices.

390. This beautiful exchange, one of many you have observed is a confirming reflection of Brotherhood alive in Humanity. As you have commented Jennifer – ‘ As I ponder on why I am observing this now and not so much before, I can only put it down to how I treat and care for myself’ – is evidence that it all begins with us claiming ourselves, claiming how tender and precious we are and then this will be reflected everyday in the life we live. Brotherhood in action.

391. The dedication to care that I have seen in hospital staff is very humbling.

392. By being self observant, especially in the case of beliefs and ideals we become professional observers of life also.

393. Jen as I read your blog I remembered how I felt about doctors and nurses as a little girl. I would feel how much they must care to have gone into the profession. And yes there are some that might go into medicine for other reasons, the kudos, the financial success, but that sense of the caring doctor and nurse was a strong one I had as a child.

     As life took its path I saw things I didn’t want to see and started to have a less innocent and open view of life — and I would be mistrusting of doctors, hospitals and nursing staff. This has changed in the last few years as I’ve learnt to open up so much more with myself, care for myself deeply and from there naturally open up and feel the love in others too. Recent visits to the doctor have not been uncomfortable — I have been met back with that care I now have for myself.

394. In the UK there is a lot of negative light being shone on doctors and the NHS, and I’ve read many articles about working 50 hour shifts, doctor suicide rates being the highest they’ve ever been by a mile, 80 hour weeks, how not many doctor’s feel they make a difference and so forth, and although all of these things must be addressed I feel we are missing out on the ‘good stuff’ that doctor’s do and experience, and testimonies from those that really love their job and getting up each morning. ‘We are in this business because we truly love to care’ – thank you for sharing this Jennifer, it is a breath of fresh air 🙂

     1. Yes, news is completely oriented towards the negative and anything positive in my experience is only written up if it is a sensation “cancer cured!”. People doing a beautiful job might be news that is too confronting for many people…

        1. This comes from how we are with ourselves that we then view everything around us in the same light. I realised years ago now that I was mostly only looking for the negatives in my self, therefore in life around me. There is so much beauty out there to be seen every day.

     2. That is what I felt Susie, it was great to read an article appreciating the amazing dedication and caring presented by these doctors.

        1. And when we meet this, caring doctors, it’s so good to let them know. My GP practice has listened to patient comments and has made changes, and are far more responsive to patients than before. Whenever I experience a doctor that is gentle and warm, or a helpful receptionist I let them know, it may be in a word, a smile, something to show my appreciation. Doctors and nurses are so often criticised, whenever I can, I leave messages of appreciation whenever I’ve witnessed loving patient care.

     3. I agree Susie, we know working within the medical profession can be very stressful and that is where all the focus goes, but how many moments of genuine caring occur on a daily basis within our hospital which go unnoticed and undocumented.

     4. Beautiful Susie.. its so easy to get lost in the horror stories, the negative press etc., yet having spent some time watching how people get cared for in hospitals, I have been struck by the dedication that underpins the whole system. It’s not like a desk job where you can simply put the pen down and come back to it tomorrow. It’s life and death, and that is both demanding and also hugely rewarding.

        1. Absolutely Simon. There are certain jobs that have a very negative light shone on them, but often when you actually go in and talk to the people who do them day in and day out, they each have a reason for doing the job they do, and some really appreciate the things they do.

     5. It is a shame that so many doctors get into the industry because they genuinely care only to discover a system desperately trying to keep up with demand, monopolises their time to such an extent they don’t get to put this natural expression into action like they would have liked to. Sadly this is a great disservice to doctors and patients alike.

        1. Absolutely Samantha; to run the health system based on money and figures at the bottom of a finance account clashes enormously with what medicine is naturally designed to do – focus 100% on supporting the public. As soon as patients become just numbers on a sheet there will be collision between those working to ‘keep up with demand and monopolise their time’, and those in it to truly support each patient.

395. Lovely to read your appreciation of the Doctors Jennifer, our lives are always so much richer when we can appreciate others and in this regard I could feel how much more joyful your work environment would be from having that awareness and appreciation of others.

     1. This I agree with Stephen and having brought this way of being to my family I have been able to see how amazing they are naturally, this is a total turn around.

396. Love this Jennifer. Not letting a moment like this pass by without feeling/observing the genuine tender, loving, professional care that is offered by another (Dr’s in this case with their patient). I feel that by bringing more self-love, self-care into our own lives certainly opens up a whole new awareness of focusing on the positive exchange between others. For myself in the past having not lived daily with a lot of self-love the focus could often be on the uncaring world, others lack of care and commitment to another. How would I recognise that wonderful exchange if it was not already present in my own way of living first. Just as you share Jennifer.

397. Beautiful Jennifer. The qualities we see in other are a reflection of the qualities held within ourselves. What I have found is that on the flip side, if there is something I react to in another, bringing it back home to how I am with myself opens up a space for understanding myself and likewise the other person, then the reactive feeling fades out and the relationship can change.

398. I really enjoyed reading this blog this morning, and it seems to me that there are many moments like this that go unnoticed and unappreciated, and yes, maybe as we become more aware and appreciative of ourselves we will be open to seeing and feeling these moments happening everywhere. I feel inspired to observe these moments in my own work environment.

399. Jennifer I have learned also how important it is to clock those tender moments between people and to express my appreciation of them. So often we are quick to complain about moments that cause us stress or reaction, but how often do we stop and say to someone “thank you” that was gorgeous! Quite often those people in those situations may not fully appreciate themselves or their quality in that moment, so how amazing to have someone without agenda come along and confirm them for the love that they are and have just expressed.

400. “The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.” This is such a poignant statement showing how we experience the world is a reflection of we feel about ourselves.

401. Jennifer with self-care and love, we see and feel more. What is beautiful is that you noted the interaction between with the two doctors and the level of care in their approach. I am meeting more doctors relating to patients openly and inclusively. After many years of experiencing doctors who are remote and communicate with patients not as people, I appreciate the the way some GP practices and hospitals have put patient care at the heart of what they do. And that makes a whole lot of difference to the patient experience of care.

402. Training to be a doctor is long and arduous and most go into the training because they care about the wellbeing of their fellow human being, there may be a few who are attracted by the recognition and kudos of being a doctor and see the patient as the symptom to be ‘fixed’ rather than the person. The way the doctors and all the hospital team interact with patients can make all the difference in how the patient feels, whether they symptom can be ‘fixed’ or not. When all work together it is a truly caring profession.

403. What I love most about your blog Jennifer is that it is filled to the brim with care. Each word written carries the deep level of care you hold for yourself, your patients and the doctors you witnessed in conversation.

404. It is beautiful to allow ourself to feel the true essence of others and see that we all actually deeply care for others, but are sometimes so caught up in all our own things that this is not shown.

405. The amount of time and effort it takes to become a doctor is not always about a well paying job at the end of it. We all have a part to play, as you have mentioned the varied scope of people that work in a hospital that are a unified team of caring for others. This is not a job but a way of life.

     1. Well said Steve, as the study and dedication needed is a massive commitment. Then the job of Doctor, Nurse, or infact any health care professional is never a 9 to 5 job, as nights, weekends and long days of work are the norm in this industry. An industry you would not stick with if a deep care of people was not at the core of our being.

406. It is so true that if we are not loving and caring with ourselves we are less likely to see that in others. It is incredible how life works, the more we build a loving relationship with ourselves this is then also gets reflected into all our relationships. So, no one gets left out, when we are loving it naturally transfers to others. Incredible.

407. Wow Jennifer, this is a beautiful blog. I love your observation, it feels exquisite reading about your awareness and care for others. ‘The more open, tender and genuinely caring I am with myself, the more I see this in others.’ This is an awesome reminder for us all. We can often get caught up in the day to day rush and forget to stop to appreciate the simple observations in our everyday life that are simply magical. Thank you for sharing with us.

     1. Such a great point…. it is so easy to get caught up in the busyness of life that we can miss the beauty and magic in the moments all around us that remind us what’s truly important.

408. I agree with you Jennifer that deep inside we all love people to the bones and from there we do truly care for on another, no matter of how hard and well protected people, the outer shell, may look like.

     1. I agree Nico, learning to remain open and full of love, and not shut down when I feel another holding back their beauty is a continuing process, but a process I am embracing and one that is constantly showing me the depth of love and care I hold for myself and others.

        1. Well said Leigh, because being open and vulnerable, it is our natural way of expression, we are innately committed in returning in full to that state of being with life. In our vulnerability we continuously feel the love we hold for ourselves and for all of humanity.

409. “I can only put it down to how I treat and care for myself.” and to me this is the key Jennifer that makes us able to see there are, always have been and always will be people that do take care for one another, but we can only truly appreciate its true value when we have found this quality in life also for ourselves.

410. Beautiful to read what you now observe around you Jennifer by caring for yourself and being open to seeing that in others. I’ve been amazed also by how much my view of people has changed due to how I now see myself. When I judged and criticized myself that is what I saw all around. It’s like taking a set of polluted glasses off and replacing them with crystal clear ones.

411. “and there are many exquisitely beautiful moments between patients, relatives, cleaners, kitchen staff…everyone in fact.” so true Jennifer. The more I have given myself some space, the more I am able to recognise these moments also. The more love I am, the more love I recognise and accept. It’s gorgeous to be able to observe, catch these moments and appreciate them.

     1. Dear Emily, it is so very beautiful to live our lives, truly, joyfully live our lives. The more I surrender to myself, the more I experience exactly as you describe here.

412. That is awesome Jennifer, so often we can cloud people and situations with our pre-conceived thoughts and judgements. Just because somebody may have acted in a certain way in one instance does not mean they will in the next. The more I am able to allow people to simply be in all their glory and imperfections the more beauty I see in them and in life.

     1. To add to this James, the more I accept and allow others to be, the more joy I feel and share.

413. Thank you for this blog. I have been guilty in the past of criticising both nurses and doctors for their lack of care. I now realise how important it is to appreciate the care that is there and to realise, as you have shown, that we are all naturally caring.

414. I love how you describe the true caring nature of people, Jennifer. We go into the ‘caring professions’ such as medicine and nursing because we do do care, however it is the system that affects people so they can be too busy to spend time with patients sometimes. But it is possible to meet and connect with our fellow humans even if we only have a short time to spend with them.

     1. So true Sueq2012,
        when I am present and in full appreciation of who I am, I meet everyone, as this then happens in bare moments.

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